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Original poster

Is anyone thinking of keeping kids off school in Aug/Sep?

384 replies

user8558 · 11/07/2020 08:57

I know a lot can change before then.

And I know lots of kids are desperate to go back and parents desperate for them to go back.

But is anyone considering at this stage keeping them home a little longer?

OP posts:
NotShiny · 12/07/2020 20:43

"So if your children arent attending school but are still seeing and have contact with friends that probably are in school what's the difference? "

I was referring to the other poster. But for myself, my child has met with a couple of friends, some have taken up the offer of half a day catch up one day a week, most havent.

"The friend who is attending school could quite easily spread the virus to your dc outside the school setting."

There is still less chance catching it from one child, socially distanced, outside, than there is in a school year group bubble of 100 or more, not socially distanced. In our school, there is often 3 squeezed to a desk, so they are physically squashed in.

"If you are going to enjoy a normal life outside school you may aswell enjoy life inside school too otherwise whats the point?"
That's not true though is it, as I've explained above. Meeting one child socially distanced outside, is a whole different thing to being squashed 3 to a desk, in school.

Uhoh2020 · 12/07/2020 21:08

@Notshiny Ok its different for you as you live in wales as you've said many times.

However for those in England NOT wanting to send their children but at the same time giving them an otherwise "normal life " (your quote not mine, my version of normal by the way is as it was before not a SD meet with 1 friend occasionally at the park because that was never the norm before this) is just hypocritical.

NotShiny · 12/07/2020 21:16

"However for those in England NOT wanting to send their children but at the same time giving them an otherwise "normal life " (your quote not mine, my version of normal by the way is as it was before not a SD meet with 1 friend occasionally at the park because that was never the norm before this) is just hypocritical."

Uhoh, it was you who used the term "normal life"...I was clearly quoting you.

NotShiny · 12/07/2020 21:21

"If you are going to enjoy a normal life outside school you may aswell enjoy life inside school too otherwise whats the point?"
This is where you used the term "normal life uhoh.

NotShiny · 12/07/2020 21:27

Also uhoh, you make great pains to point out I live in Wales, mumsnet is not just for the English you know, it's for everyone, so I am allowed to come on here and say what I like. It is not your thread, it is everyone's thread. The question the op put up was to parents, not just English parents.

GinFling · 12/07/2020 21:32

@CallmeAngelina I know as much as anyone else watching what is happening around the world, where outbreaks are popping up all over the place and schools are having to shut again.
I’d love to see any evidence for these outbreaks? It’s certainly not something that’s widely reported Hmm

duffeldaisy · 12/07/2020 21:33

We're going to go by what the figures are doing.

I desperately want the kids to get back to 'normality', but the virus does its own thing, and if there are hundreds of deaths happening each day and our area has a high rate then no, I'm not sending ours back to a huge bubble.

What I'm hoping is that over the summer there will be more developments in treatment, and a vaccine will be closer, and ideally the virus will mutate into something much weaker.

At the moment I'm furious that places like pubs, where social distancing is going to be really hard, are being prioritised, rather than keeping things locked down longer so that the kids can go back to school later in the year.
I'm dreading cases and deaths steadily increasing now, so it becomes riskier just in time for schools reopening.

I don't want to keep my kids off, I really want them to see their friends again and learn normally, but not at the expense of everyone's health/lives.

Uhoh2020 · 12/07/2020 21:34

I think its here YOU quote normal life @NotShiny

Uhoh2020 · 12/07/2020 21:35

@NotShiny

"I feel so sorry for children in this situation, how long are you going to deny them access to other people, their friends, a normal life." What an awful comment to make. You dont know the poster. Not sending them to school doesnt mean they are being denied access to other people necessarily. Nor does it mean not seeing their friends or leading a normal life. Theres a massive difference between seeing friends and being squashed into school with hundreds of others.
This is your quote of normal life not mine
Greydrapex · 13/07/2020 00:28

No, my daughter has been going full time for the last 4 weeks anyway.

NotShiny · 13/07/2020 10:12

"21:34Uhoh2020

I think its here YOU quote normal life@NotShiny

Bookmark

Yesterday 21:35Uhoh2020

NotShiny

"I feel so sorry for children in this situation, how long are you going to deny them access to other people, their friends, a normal life."
What an awful comment to make. You dont know the poster. Not sending them to school doesnt mean they are being denied access to other people necessarily. Nor does it mean not seeing their friends or leading a normal life. Theres a massive difference between seeing friends and being squashed into school with hundreds of others."

"This is your quote of normal life not mine"

Oh dear uhoh, you really arent understanding what quote mark's mean. Somebody else said the term "normal life", and I copied the quote and commented on it. ITS NOT MY QUOTE. Then YOU also used the term "normal life", and I commented on that too. Do you understand now, that it wasnt my quote to begin with? I commented on yourself and another poster using it!!!! So you cant then say I'm the one who is hypocritical.

NotShiny · 13/07/2020 10:23

"16:13lifesalongsong

Bignet182

"Yes, better safe than sorry."

"I feel so sorry for children in this situation, how long are you going to deny them access to other people, their friends, a normal life."

See uhoh...it was the poster lifesongalong who used the term "normal life", at 16.16 yesterday. I then commented on it at 17.05. You then said...
"If you are going to enjoy a normal life outside school you may aswell enjoy life inside school too otherwise whats the point" at 18.56.
So I replied to you. You cant then turn that against me, saying it was my phrase, not yours, as you clearly said it at 18.56. So it was yourself and another poster who used this term, not me.

NotShiny · 13/07/2020 10:31

Anyhow, it's irrelevant really, life is not normal currently, but we can make it as normal as it can be (and it's not too far off normal). My kids dont feel at a detriment at the moment, they mainly chill all day, talking to friends on social media, go and meet one or two of them every couple of days at a social distance, and come out with us on days out. They are living the life really, with no school, just doing the odd bit of work online. Of course in September, they wont be able to chat with all their friends as probably most will be back at school by then, but think theyd be pretty happy if I kept them off a bit longer, if that's what I decide to do. I cant understand comments from others on here claiming kids that wont go back will be hard done to in some way. If mine dont go back, it will only be temporary, based on covid numbers in our area. I just want to make an informed decision at the time really.

lifeonhardmodept2 · 13/07/2020 11:00

I totally agree with this. DD is autistic and hasn't been in school for 2 years. Lockdown has provided us with opportunities we wouldn’t have normally had, like Joe Wicks, BBC Bitesize, Oak National. We were doing plenty of other things before these came along but they are a fantastic resource.

My youngest has been flourishing with his learning as well. He hadn’t really learned anything in the few years he has been at school. He can now read better, he knows about continents and planets etc. The school said that his behaviour (ADHD) made it impossible for him to follow the curriculum. At home, because there are less distractions and it is easier for me to focus them learning around his interests, he has improved so much.

My eldest suffered with school anxiety which reduced his attendance massively, but as a particularly academic child he wrestled with his mental health issues and his desire to learn. Now he can just get on with it. No pressure.

I have gone back and forth on whether they will return in September or not. Partly due to the virus, which is not gone, but mostly because the difference being out of school has made to my children. For some people, it is about more than whether or not it is safe. I would never have had the opportunity to try "homeschooling" without fear of consequences before. Now that I have, I am not sure it is the best environment for them to be in. Socialisation is the main reason I am still considering letting them return. However, school will not be providing many opportunities for them to socialise in the usual ways any more.

lifeonhardmodept2 · 13/07/2020 11:01

Excuse the typos. I'm on my iPad with youngest on my lap.

doubleshotespresso · 13/07/2020 11:07

I don't think any parent can decide this yet...

We will be keeping a close eye on figures late August and making some decisions then.

If it still feels a bit too hairy then we will keep DC home until we are satisfied it's safer. This also hinges largely on quite what kind of approaches the school adopts in terms of distancing. Currently the plan is normal classes of 30 which seems ridiculous right now.

If there are fines imposed so be it.

NotShiny · 13/07/2020 12:18

Doubleshotespresso...I totally agree, I'm so surprised at what seems to be the majority of people on here just blindfully wanting their kids back at school when this danger hasnt gone away. I want facts, figures, reassurances first.

CallmeAngelina · 13/07/2020 12:24

I want facts, figures, reassurances first.

Yes, and preferably ones that we can believe and trust are correct.

labyrinthloafer · 13/07/2020 12:25

@doubleshotespresso

I don't think any parent can decide this yet...

We will be keeping a close eye on figures late August and making some decisions then.

If it still feels a bit too hairy then we will keep DC home until we are satisfied it's safer. This also hinges largely on quite what kind of approaches the school adopts in terms of distancing. Currently the plan is normal classes of 30 which seems ridiculous right now.

If there are fines imposed so be it.

This is my thinking too, and have said same to the head.
Lovingmummy9 · 13/07/2020 12:25

So happy to see more balanced views other than ‘if you don’t send them you’re bad parents’. I think for now my decision will be based on what’s happening with the virus at the time and also may wait to see how many outbreaks happen at school first and see how they handle it. I can assure all of you that think all children are suffering that mine aren’t, they’re very very happy. I find homeschooling hard with a young baby too but gosh it’s not that bad especially for primary! It’s not like they’re doing a PhD. We have had an amazing time in lockdown and I really question why they seem happier now compared to when they’d come back from school and feel anxious about someone being mean or a group of girls leaving them out. Have we forgotten how nasty school can be sometimes too? Why is all of a sudden a place of bliss for children? Always seemed like a headache to mine and only good for education. My children are very academic so that’s the only reason I suppose I want them to go back but as far as the social side, I prefer to pick my own bubble of decent friends and family for them to play with rather than 30 children that keep breaking up each week causing anxiety!

SueEllenMishke · 13/07/2020 12:42

I find homeschooling hard with a young baby too but gosh it’s not that bad especially for primary! It’s not like they’re doing a PhD.

I think you are completely missing the point here. It's not that the work is hard it's trying to fit it in while working full time. That is the challenging aspect.
Plus for a lot of children school is their safe place - home isn't always a sanctuary.

HesterShaw1 · 13/07/2020 12:46

@user8558

Yes it's safer now.

But if numbers start to increase between now and then - if deaths are forecast to be back up to 800 a day by November, there has to come a point when it no longer is safe.

What is that point?

I think many people here would be sending their kids to school if deaths were steadily 1k a day.

But there must be others that a nervous.

It's not health anxiety if you are very vulnerable to a the disease.

When deaths were 800 a day, that was because of the massive number of infections in March, when the virus was absolutely rife. With everything we have done since to suppress the virus, what makes you think deaths will be back up to 800 a day?
Jrobhatch29 · 13/07/2020 12:52

I still dont understand people saying I will keep them off until I think it is safe. It is not how schools work. If the government say it is compulsary then they have to go if you want to keep their place. It wont be like when they pop off to spain for 2 weeks and get a fine. They will not just keep fining you until you decide you are sending them back. When will that be? You will lose your place. Schools aren't drop in centres and many schools have waiting lists, especially gor reception and y7 if other families did not get their first choice school. Ultimately if it goes on for longer than a month or so there is unlikely to be a place to go back to.

Uhoh2020 · 13/07/2020 13:03

Their education has suffered enough as it is, whilst I'm grateful of the the learning provisions that have been provided in no way do I feel it was on par with the education they would have received during the school setting had this not happened. A few twinkl worksheets and some oak academy and bbc bitesize web links are certainly not the same as a teacher classroom led lesson.
Those especially in secondary schools doing GCSES need a full proper taught curriculum.

lifeonhardmodept2 · 13/07/2020 13:13

@SueEllenMishke

I find homeschooling hard with a young baby too but gosh it’s not that bad especially for primary! It’s not like they’re doing a PhD.

I think you are completely missing the point here. It's not that the work is hard it's trying to fit it in while working full time. That is the challenging aspect.
Plus for a lot of children school is their safe place - home isn't always a sanctuary.

I think the point here is that school isn't always a sanctuary either. My child had a nervous breakdown that has taken our family months to recover from. It was caused by school. She was a complete wreck and if I had only kept her home when she needed me to, we might have avoided a lot of heartache.

Schools aren't always the safe haven they are being made out to be.