Has anyone not sent their Y1 child back?

[BatBoo]

When it was first announced that YR, Y1 and Y6 could go back to school, there was a definite feeling of it's too soon, using our little ones as guinea pigs etc. Because I am able to WFH we decided not to send either DD1 (5) back to Y1 and DD2 (2) to nursery. Most parents I know did the same and the ones who couldn't WFH and had to send them felt guilty.

Now, it seems to have changed and people have the opposite feeling on the matter, that all children should be at school and our kids are being failed missing out on their education and socialising with others their age.

So my question is... should I send them both back even though I am at home? Is being at home with me in their best interests? Or would they get much more from being at school/nursery? I initially felt I was doing the right thing but now I feel like a bit... I don't know... cruel.

I wouldn't be led by how other people feel. What do you think? Would they even have space in the school at this point?

My Y1 is back (well, she was always in the KW bubble anyway but now she's with her year) but only half the parents of the year group decided to send their children so you definitely aren't unusual.

I don't think it's possible to change your mind at our school though because the bubble is full. Probably not the case everywhere though.

I don't

I haven't but only because the school said they can only take 9 out of 27 kids due to the distancing. They don't have enough staff apparently to make more bubbles so they're operating a waiting list system. As it stands mine won't go back until November at the earliest.

I haven’t sent mine back. Her Y4 brother isn’t due back in and I’d rather have them both at home to entertain each other while I try to WFH than have one wanting my attention all the time. Plus without wraparound care, the school run would be an issue with WFH.

I don't have a Y1 child, but this definitely happened at our school. Slow take up to begin with, but more and more children are taking up their places as it all seems to be going well.

Still, it's up to you OP. Make a decision based on your view of the benefit versus the risk to your child.

I’m a stay at home parent, I don’t need childcare. My year 1 is back at school, happy and settled, learning stuff, playing with friends and basically being a child again. I have actually welled up watching him and his friends at playtime (I can see the playground from my daily walk). Don’t feel guilty about sending him back and never did. Several parents of his peers who were adamant their child wasn’t going back until it was “safe”, they wouldn’t be guinea pigs etc and were quite judgey about those of us whose children returned now lament that their child is missing out and say they regret not sending them (no space left now).

I’d have sent my nursery age child too if there was space left in their class bubble, unfortunately they could only take those going up to reception next year. I’m really sad for them about all they’re missing out on.

I would also question if it’s even possible to change your mind at this stage. Most schools are now full and have planned according to the numbers who initially said they wanted to send their children back. If my children had been offered a place initially (they weren’t as they’re yr2 and yr5) I would personally have snapped the school’s hand off but as you say it was controversial at the time and it felt like there was a lot of judgement of parents who did choose to send their children back. There was also so much negative PR in the media. It’s no wonder parents were left doubting their decisions.

My year 1 is back since the beginning of this week- in his year, 20 out of 30 children are back but school are not accepting anymore now. In the other local school about 50pc of year 1s are back but they are still accepting more children so it really depends on the school and the child. Some children in my DS class are so so happy to be back. I think
my DS prefers being at home but he was becoming so quiet at home I thought it would be better for him to go back for a bit as the summer holidays are going to be long and I felt 6 months out of school would just be too long for him. He is quiet and compliant and not very sociable.

In my child’s class 28 out of 31 went back as soon at the school opened so maybe it’s quite area dependent? Certainly not just people who couldn’t work from home and I’m not aware anyone feels guilty about it.

If I'd had the choice, I would have definitely sent my Yr2... But not my Yr4. Very different children. Before Lockdown the eldest had just got over a bout of school anxiety, so I'm not sure she would have settled back in easily, plus I don't think the teacher/TA could have used their normal strategies with her, which include hugs.

Some children are happier at home at the moment. Some are better off in school. Some have no choice.

All 3 of ours could have gone back (pre school, nursery and year 1) but we've kept them all at home. We're WFH, so the logistics of the staggered drop offs and pick ups, and the different location for the nursery made it really difficult without the usual wrap around care. We could just send our eldest back, but he's a godsend when it comes to keeping his younger sisters entertained!!
I'm not that worried about infection right now as we're not in a vulnerable group etc. It looks (from a class zoom catch up today) that around half of year 1 are back.

Why November @Cherrybakewellard?

At my ds school you now cant send them back even if in the returning year groups. Bubbles are full and they don’t have enough teachers at the moment to open anymore. We didn’t send him back as felt it was a bit too soon and we have dd (3) home anyway. We possibly would have sent him back a couple of days a week in July if that had been an option, but decision has been made for us now.

When I sent DD back to nursery, there was 5 kids each day. Now they are having to turn parents away. I fully predicted this would happen & formed part of my reasoning to get her back ASAP! I didn’t think schools would cause major outbreaks during summer nor did I think children would be traumatised by the changes. And both are true. Now parents have seen the ‘guinea pigs’ 🙄, suddenly they feel a bit jealous of the other parents not juggling work & childcare or that their kids are in fact missing time with their friends..

Don’t let other people influence your thoughts, do what’s right for your kids & your circumstances.

There were 6 kids in DD's Yr 1 bubble (out of 15) on the first day, there's 11 now. They aren't taking any more kids, so there's only a few kids still not attending, and yes, those were the "my kids won't be guinea pigs" parents in the beginning who now feel their kids are missing out.

Really? All the parents who kept their children at home now lament that decision? That doesn't sound remotely likely.

My DC have benefitted so much from going back. Confidence resumed, they get to play, learn and socialise with other children.

Each to their own, but going back was the right choice for us.

Ds 11 went back on Monday. Ds 5 is at home. He has asthma and was premature.. No regrets about my decision.
Dc were happy also.

Not all the parents lamenting, obviously. Plenty had very good reasons for their decisions that still stand - most of those parents weren’t the judgey ones. But those that were most vocal about not being guinea pigs or statistics are now most vocal about wanting to come back. Maybe they’re just the most vocal people?!

We haven't sent did back Initially not many went back but more bubbles have been created and lots more are now going back on Monday.

Ds is year 5 and it made more sense to keep them together as they have adjusted well.

Noisy people do tend to have the most black and white opinions. Most people just make their decisions and quietly get on with it.

I sent my yr6 DD back. She wanted to go and I was very much on the fence about it but I'm glad I did now. It's given us all a boost. Given us something to work for, a routine to keep to - which we desperately needed. I have other age kids at home still so I'm not back to living it up or anything but I'll definitely be sending the others back when their age groups open up because they need to and it's the right thing for us.

My reception age dd is back and so glad she is. She loves it and is learning as well and seeing her friends. My husband is still furloughed so she could have stayed off for a bit longer but he will be back in the next couple of weeks I think and if we had said no at the start we wouldnt have got a place for her later as they have said no more kids can be added now. Think a lot must have been asking as they have sent a message out about it. We were struggling to do much home schooling as I am working and her dad has our 2 year old to look after as well so not much quite time to do school work.

I have kept my Y1 child at home. We are bored but happy. Our school are chocablock so I imagine they're happy with things too.

I'm a teacher, but have kept my Y1 dd at home by juggling with dh and my adult dd.

I couldn't see the point. It's not that sociable and they wouldn't be with familiar teachers.

Also, they are doing the same work as is being sent home.

It's a personal decision, so do what is right for you.