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Original poster

Anyone missing just being on their own?

90 replies

MilkTrayLimeBarrel · 02/05/2020 10:32

Just that really. Before lockdown I had my own routine for doing things and having the house how I like. I am beginning to find DH's habits really infuriating. Examples are:

  • making endless cups of tea and coffee, always with a new teaspoon which he leaves on my clean tea towel
  • never ever washes up an empty milk bottle - just leaves it until I have to do it!
  • stands behind me when I am on my PC/tablet and comments on what I am looking at
  • throws all his shoes, clothes and jackets either onto the floor or into the bottom of the wardrobe
  • never cleans his bathroom unless I nag and nag
  • won't clean his desktop (glass) even though I leave the spray and cloth on it and ask him to do it

I know these are small problems in the way of things, but they all just make me crosser and crosser. I NEED time on my own!

OP posts:
bathorshower · 02/05/2020 19:06

I've found my people - others have said 'lockdown is easier for introverts'. Not if they're surrounded by their family it isn't!

For those who wonder about retirement, DH is a lot less hard work than DD, though the chances of him making it to retirement age aren't great. But you don't have to spend all the time every day together when you're retired - surely it's normal to have some separate interests?

Wewearpinkonwednesdays · 02/05/2020 19:07

I probably get more time alone now than ever. I'm a childminder so obviously I'm around kids from 7.30am till 6pm, than I still have my own to look after. DP is hardly every here between work and foor ball but now he he here all the time. I am going a walk or a run myself every day. I go for shopping myself (which is very rare usually). Think I might struggle to go back to normal.

JacobReesMogadishu · 02/05/2020 19:11

Oh god yes. I’m currently On the iPad in bed just to have some space while dh is watching tv downstairs. I might sneak downstairs in a minute for a chocolate raid and come back to bed with it.

loopylindazdaughter · 02/05/2020 19:13

YES!! for me it's the hardest thing about all this

Peanutbutteryogurt · 02/05/2020 19:14

God yes. When this is over I'm booking a days annual leave and sending DD to nursery and just being home by myself.

chunkyrun · 02/05/2020 20:19

God yes. When this is over I'm booking a days annual leave and sending DD to nursery and just being home by myself.

That sounds blissful

LunaDeet · 02/05/2020 20:56

That’s the first thing I’m doing as well. I’ll pack DD off to nursery and just sit in silence all day! Once she’s asleep DP goes downstairs and I stay upstairs every evening now so we can have an hour to ourselves. It’s just not enough for me, some days I really struggle.

Stellaris22 · 02/05/2020 20:57

Yes!

I have my routine of school run, then leisurely time with the dog and socialising (dog with her doggy pals mostly!) before going home.

I feel like I've had a non stop headache for over a month and miss my quiet time. I know I'm lucky but I really miss my quiet time and relaxing cup of coffee by myself to unwind.

Hairwizard · 02/05/2020 21:04

@CornishYarg
Ive been doing the same. Otherwise i feel cheated 🤣🤣

CornishYarg · 02/05/2020 21:10

@Hairwizard Exactly! Once it gets past midnight, I keep thinking I'd better go to bed soon but I'm enjoying the quiet so much I don't want to Grin

Perfidy · 02/05/2020 21:23

Yes, dh used to work away a lot, I just want a night on m6 own when I cook something I wan5 to eat and tv I want to watch. Or no tv...

Early morning bike rides are good.

MotherofDogs3 · 02/05/2020 21:26

Hell yes i do! Just before lockdown we have had to take on my neices who are 5 and 7. I have no idea when they will be going home as my sisters mentaly unwell and now social workers involved. So i have gone from no kids and a partner at work allday 5 days a week to having no time at all looking after two hyper active kids! My partners still working luckily. Im self employed and did work from home but no longer Able to. Im starting to get used to things now but was really hard for me at the start. Luckily they quite good kids who we both adore and they have given us a good tester for when we decide to have kids lol i think id rather have them home all day then my partner he does my head in enough as it is 😂

Pomegranatepompom · 02/05/2020 21:29

Yes - I really miss time to myself, a tidy house and lying on the sofa in total silence, reading a book.

homeschoolmyarse · 02/05/2020 21:30

Oh god yes
All my waking hours I have to hear “look Mum” every fucking minute

Weatherforducks · 02/05/2020 21:32

Yes I do miss time on my own!! But my life has changed so little compared to the rest of the family...so I can’t say this out loud in real life. My kids are adopted and so the decision was that I would stay at home for at least 2 years until they were both settled in school. Eldest was loving school, youngest was thriving going to nursery twice a week and being at home with me the rest of the time...she really gained confidence not being in her older sibs shadow...and I had a very precious 5.5 hours free on a Monday and 5.5 hours free on a Friday. Having this free time felt so indulgent, I sometimes watched Netflix and ate garlic bread with cheese and ham, but mostly I was gardening. I had started to grow veggies and planned to get some chickens. Now I have to fit in my gardening around the DH’s conference calls (which does not give me much time). I know how spoiled I sound btw, and I am... I know, i’m very lucky. But as I currently don’t have a career to focus on, I had found something that was just mine, separate from everyone else and i’m missing it.

norbert23 · 02/05/2020 21:40

Yes! 4 year old and 8 month old who is crawling. 4 year old constantly asking me "when you were 4, could you do this?" as she does some half hearted balance/ jump / dance etc and if it's not that she's hungry all the time despite cooking her whatever she wants. I'd pay good money for a day alone reading in bed and a hot cup of tea 😆

Defenbaker · 02/05/2020 21:59

Yes, I feel the same. DH and I are both on furlough and are getting under each other's feet a bit. We live in a small semi and have a small garden, and the last few weeks have made me wish we had more space, indoors and out.

I go for a long walk most days, which helps, but lots of other people are also doing the same thing, so the pavements can be quite busy. Walking is not as relaxing as it used to be, due to needing to constantly dodge out of the way to keep a safe distance. DH usually plays golf twice a week, but the club has been shut for 5 weeks. Sometimes it's difficult making conversation as neither of us has anything new to talk about, because we're both living a very dull life in lockdown. I'm lucky that I can still enjoy my hobby, which is gardening, but many nearby neighbours are also home on furlough so my garden isn't as quiet as usual.

I realise I'm lucky to have a garden, and lucky to have a decent husband who tries to give me some personal space, but sometimes I could scream. I'm bored, I feel hemmed in and depressed, and I miss work, I miss random conversation with work colleagues.

tinkywinkyshandbag · 02/05/2020 22:16

Yes!!!

UntamedShrew · 02/05/2020 22:42

God yes. A million times yes. I really miss... myself!

yearinyearout · 02/05/2020 23:10

Yes! Was bad enough when DH worked from home most of the time anyway, but at least I could be out and about. As well as him I've got adult dc here for lockdown and I just can't get any time to myself. If it's not one of them wanting a piece of me it's the dog.

ChippityDoDa · 02/05/2020 23:14

This is my biggest issue too. I’m a SAHM to a 7 year old and a 3 year old so they’re at school/preschool. I do a bit of freelance writing from home but obviously I currently have no work. I adore being in my own in the house and I miss it SO much. House is a shit tip and DH habits annoying me. To top it all my DH is sulking tonight because earlier he criticised my efforts at home schooling so I quite rightly told him to give it a whirl and see how good he is at it. Bloody hell, when is this going to end?!?!

TheSandman · 02/05/2020 23:42

God yes. A million times yes. I really miss... myself!

I said to a friend today (we met in a shop on my once a week trip to the nearest town) that I don't think I have had an original thought for the last month. I haven't written anything, drawn anything, made anything that wasn't reactive. I've hardly done anything in my sketchbooks or sat at my drawing table. My muse has buggered off somewhere because it can't cope with all the endless chatter.

homeschoolmyarse · 02/05/2020 23:50

My sky box is completely full with my programmes, just sitting there begging me to watch them with a cup of tea and a biscuit

bellabelly · 03/05/2020 11:35

I think that is what I miss the most - having the house to myself and just doing what I want. I keep wanting to cook a fry up just for me but I can't - everyone else will want one too and it won't be an indulgent treat, just a hassle!

Original poster
MilkTrayLimeBarrel · 03/05/2020 11:41

I find I can't be alone in any room of the house (except the loo!). Just this morning, DH came into the kitchen to make yet another cup of tea so I went into the sitting room. He followed me in and started playing with his phone while waiting for the kettle to boil, so I went outside into the front garden. He opens the front door and asks what I am doing! Aarghhhhh!

OP posts:
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