How long can you realistically not see your family for?

[YourNameIsSenNow]

I know the simple answer is 'until lock down is over'

However, I took my kids out of school a week early.

We've followed every lockdown rule since then.

Complete isolation for the kids. Just walks in fields. They've been near no adult but us.

I'm feeling so lonely.

As is my sister. Single parent.

She lives a short walk away and we've not seen each other for a month.

I'm seriously considering asking her over for the kids to play

She's been isolating too completly.

Highly unlikely any of us have it. No symptoms at all.

It seems like A&Es are very quiet

I know I'm probaly being unreasonable but we've followed every instruction and I feel like I'm going insane for some adult conversation and normality.

I can't do this much longer

My parents are dead, haven't seen my DB in 18 months and I never see my extended family who live all over the country. PIL/SIL live an hour away and we usually only see them every three months so this side of the lockdown isn't too big a deal for us tbh.
I'd rather my year 10 and 12 could get back to school.

I’ve been on my own now for over 4 weeks, I’m normally very happy to be on my own but even I’m starting to massively struggle now. I FaceTime DP everyday, we’re finding it hard as we’re both on our own so there’s really no risk (We wouldn’t temporarily move in due to pets!) but obviously we won’t. I don’t care about anything else I just want a relaxation on visiting other people sometime soon because I don’t know how much longer I can do this.

I'll probably get flamed for this but I've heard that UK lockdown compliance levels are much higher than expected, so if you're both single parents with no vulnerability in either family I'd probably do it if you trust each other and do everything possible to avoid infection (eg no ordering items online, keeping shop visits to an absolute minimum, disinfecting everything that comes into the house etc).

I know siblings who are effectively locking down across two very nearby households and I don't blame them - one would be completely by themselves otherwise and that comes with health risks of its own.

If you have a partner I think that's different. Firstly you have adult company and secondly you're putting another person in the mix (children being low risk sol was concerning).

That's why they kept schools open for as long as possible.

Haven't seen my mum or dad for 8 years. Sisters for 3 and 2 years. We keep in touch with phone calls about twice a month and facebook messenger or whatsapp. Yes, I miss them, but there is no reason people need to break isolation to see family when technology has so many options. heck, we even did a god awful 4 household group video call the other week. Not my cup of tea, but the option is there.

Me and my DP don’t even have kids, the only reason we couldn’t lockdown in one house together is because of our pets. We both WFH, and have spent the past 4 weeks alone and apart.
I won’t break the rules, and even if I wanted to I’d be too terrified of curtain twitching neighbours!
I’m just hoping to god one of the first things is that you can visit other people. At least for people who are completely on their own right now!

My parents are in their 80s and live 3 hours from me so I haven't seen them since Christmas

What's pissed me off is my sister so still going round their 3 times a week because she apparently can't cope without seeing them, nothing to do with what they can or can't cope with

If you, as a family, and your sisters family have not seen anyone else and have been isolating since lockdown then I would. You have to think of your own mental health.

Much as you would like to, keep your distance.

I know of several families where the husband crosses an international border on his commute. Husbands took a suitcase, and are living on someones sofa. The family is split, and all they can do is wait it out. You need to do the same.

No idea when we will get to see our families - all my side are in Belgium, PIL are in Canada and DSIL in the US. We talk daily but usually see each other regularly. As soon as the lockdown lifts and flights are resumed, we’ll be off to see them.

My family are 90 miles away and DH's are 40 miles away. We miss them a lot but we make do with Skype/Zoom. I stay off camera as I don't much like how I look at the moment but I love the group chats.

Mumshappy some of those of us who live abroad and usually fly back fairly often are now not allowed to fly to our home countries at all unless for essential work or a funeral (immediate family only, no kids) - is that your idea of easier?

I'm struggling to see the logic in some of this. We are in a similar situation. My DC have not been near anyone else for 5 weeks. Dh and I are both working from home and we're getting food delivered by local companies. We have had no human contact for 3 plus weeks. I have elderly relatives who have been completely isolated as well, no shopping trips etc. Why can't we see them?! Why can't they see their grandchildren if we've all been isolating for over 14 days (the whole of lockdown!) then we are not a risk.

Also if we can have coffee with neighbours while social distancing outside (front garden chats) then why can't we go and infrequently visit relatives and have coffee in the garden etc while adhering to social distancing rules. Some of this makes no sense to me.

@YourNameIsSenNow go see your sister!!

'anothermotherone i meant if you live near to family and see them daily then it will be a bigger daily change. If you live abroad thats your choice. Ive chosen to live near my parents and see them daily and thats been taken away from my children and me. I know it will be hard for you too not being able to fly over.

I get on well with my parents and siblings - I haven’t seen them since last July. Lots of people who live apart from family don’t see them for years. It is entirely possible to never see your family again and certainly doable not to see them for extended periods.

I cant be bothered to read the whole thread, so it may have been done: why can't you speak to your sister on the phone?

I'll do it as long as long as advised and likely longer. Just to keep my family safe. I want them to be safe. I ONE is totally isolated.

I work in a public facing job so I am very careful about not coming into contact with anyone outside of my household for fear of spreading the virus. I definitely wouldn't visit my family and might not be able to for many months. My brother is terminally ill and could die before I see him next but I don't want give him cv obviously. If I was at home 100% of the time and had literally not seen another person in several weeks I would consider that I am likely to be virus free and might decide to visit my brother.

I also know lots of people who are exposed to the virus and have decided to break the rules because it suits them, for childcare or to support an isolated relative. I don't think its right but I guess they've weighed up the personal risks. I think a lot more rule breaking is happening as the lockdown continues. People have started to get bored or lonely or fed up and decided to interpret the rules to suit themselves. I don't approve and it's very frustrating but I can understand why.

Lockdown happened just a few days after we took DD home after a NICU stay.

I am not a natural to motherhood and my mental health is suffering not being able to see family or go to meet new mums etc. My emotions seem to hit a peak every so often and I feel like running away from everything.

This lockdown I am sure will contribute to higher levels of PND with a lot of new mums. I am not entirely sure if I am there yet, but I feel like I am teetering extremely close to the edge.

If you keep 2 metres apart I can’t see the problem.
I bumped into my relatives when we were both exercising in the park.
It was lovely having a catch up.

@Alarae that sounds really hard. I know there are lots of virtual mums groups and I know it's not the same but could you join lots of those? Perhaps if you have a local FB group for your area you could post on there and start one yourself? I'm sure there are lots of mums in the same position. Congratulations though!

My mate's husband spend nine months of the year on an offshore rig...

I'm struggling to see the logic in some of this. We are in a similar situation. My DC have not been near anyone else for 5 weeks. Dh and I are both working from home and we're getting food delivered by local companies. We have had no human contact for 3 plus weeks. I have elderly relatives who have been completely isolated as well, no shopping trips etc. Why can't we see them?! Why can't they see their grandchildren if we've all been isolating for over 14 days (the whole of lockdown!) then we are not a risk.

The only risk would be if you contracted it through a delivery of food, through the post, on a daily walk etc and passed it on. That risk is low, but is of course multiplied with more people in the equation.

I know of a family doing just what you suggest however. They live rurally so easier to avoid people when out for a walk, and they live very close (on same street). They are mixing with the GPs as normal (after doing 14 days strict isolation).

Iv seen my family now. Utterly fed up and my grandad is terminal And near the very end. We all went to his house as he’s about to go into a hospice and we won’t be able to visit at all so he will probably die alone.