Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Covid

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

'D'H let someone in our house...

88 replies

Chilver · 08/04/2020 12:35

...what do I need to do to make our home safe again?

Absolutely livid, H let a client into the house whilst I was in shower. Client stayed for 20 mins and H maintains they maintained 2m but I find that hard to believe. Have made him bleach every surface in kitchen and front door, open all windows, and wash the dog (he jumped up and was stroked!). H won't change clothes and says I'm overreacting, although I even heard him say to client 'wife is upset you're here as she is in the at risk group'!!! (I am!)

I'm still hiding in bedroom with child. What else can I do to make the house 'safe' again?? (Aside from getting rid of H!)

OP posts:

Cheeseandwin5 · 08/04/2020 13:51

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

TiddyTid · 08/04/2020 13:54

Jesus wept. It is not an overreaction. If we all just let things slide, even a one-off, what's the point of trying to protect us and others in the first place. The OP has cancer and unless this client is immune to this virus then this is completely unacceptable.

Your husband is a twat.

TiddyTid · 08/04/2020 13:54

So is his client

PicsInRed · 08/04/2020 13:54

He's done that in purpose to wind you up.

And knowingly put your life at risk as a result.

How was the marriage before lockdown?

PicsInRed · 08/04/2020 13:55

Strongly suggest you seek advice on the relationships board.

CaroleFuckinBaskin · 08/04/2020 13:55

If you have lung disease and cancer (are you currently on treatment?) then I don't think you are particularly overreacting. However, you need to be careful with how your child sees all this and 'hiding' in the bedroom with them may well create a lot of anxiety? 8 years old is a tricky age as they are old enough to understand everything but not old enough to rationalise it.

Charoltteli · 08/04/2020 13:57

I was going to say yes YABU you’re overreacting even though he absolutely shouldn’t have done it
Saw your updates about your health conditions, absolutely YANBU!! I’m sorry this has happened

Frenchfancy · 08/04/2020 13:58

I don't think you are over reacting given your health condition has he opened the windows to air the house?

Mysocalledlifexx · 08/04/2020 14:00

I wouldnt be happy either so i can see why u are feeling this way. Its a big worry to what we are going through just now.

T0tallyFuckedUpFamily · 08/04/2020 14:00

Your attitude stinks and shows a manipulations and control which will obviously appealing to yourself will be deeply troubling for both your DH and your DC.

Are you fucking kidding? The OP has serious and life threatening conditions and is amongst the most at risk groups. He didn’t make a ‘mistake’, he chose to let a person into his home which goes completely AGAINST the current advice. Advice that was put in place to protect people, especially people like the OP, from DEATH.

Charoltteli · 08/04/2020 14:01

However, you need to be careful with how your child sees all this and 'hiding' in the bedroom with them may well create a lot of anxiety? 8 years old is a tricky age as they are old enough to understand everything but not old enough to rationalise it
I entirely agree with this. Could cause OCD, health anxiety or generalised anxiety. I speak from experience

Charoltteli · 08/04/2020 14:02

@Cheeseandwin5 for fuck sake, did you even read the updates?!

MaxNormal · 08/04/2020 14:02

Wow How lucky your DH must be to have such a prefect Partner as you, who obviously doesn't do anything wrong.

What a shitty thing to say to a frightened cancer sufferer. You should be ashamed.

Randomschoolworker19 · 08/04/2020 14:04

You didn't over react.

The OP is in the at risk category.

I feel the same way. I have to go to work with the children who's parents work for the NHS so if there are any infections the viral load will be high.

My apartment which I live in by myself is my sanctuary. No one comes in but me. Post is left in quarantine for a few days. Shopping is wiped down. Soon as I come home clothes are thrown in the wash, I shower and wipe down things like my phone, keys, wallet and ID badge.

Your husband sounds like an arsehole.

People don't understand how serious this is. The government haven't updated the recovery rates in weeks but when they were the data was appaling.

Only 10% of people hospitalised recover. 90% die.

Bungobingi · 08/04/2020 14:04

Wow How lucky your DH must be to have such a prefect Partner as you, who obviously doesn't do anything wrong
OK he has made a mistake- If he has done all the things you say then he has more than made up for it
You are now using your child to punish him further
Your attitude stinks and shows a manipulations and control which will obviously appealing to yourself will be deeply troubling for both your DH and your DC
And you are disgusting for typing that out and posting that on a thread started by someone who has serious conditions.

OP DON’T LISTEN TO THAT POSTER!!!!!!!!!!! What a twat

TildaTurnip · 08/04/2020 14:06

Wow How lucky your DH must be to have such a prefect Partner as you, who obviously doesn't do anything wrong
OK he has made a mistake- If he has done all the things you say then he has more than made up for it
You are now using your child to punish him further Your attitude stinks and shows a manipulations and control which will obviously appealing to yourself will be deeply troubling for both your DH and your DC

Are you kidding? What a nasty post that shows complete lack of govt guidelines, understanding and compassion.

Disressingtimes · 08/04/2020 14:13

OP you are not overreacting.

DH is in the shielding category. I wouldn’t let anyone in our house so that he is protected.

Your husband is awful. He should definitely shower and change.

diddl · 08/04/2020 14:15

What twats they both are.

What about households not visiting each other are they both too stupid to understand?

Original poster

Chilver · 08/04/2020 14:27

cheeseandwin5 you should be ashamed of yourself. Disgusting post.

I actually asked how can I make my house safe again, which was a genuine question. Thank you to the posters who have responded to that and who have supported me.

As to hiding in my bedroom with my child, possibly, hiding is the wrong word, but when you live in a 2 bed flat, all open plan, I was not sure where else to be whilst the cleaning was going on.

My child is fine, thank you for the genuine concern and fuck off to those questioning my parenting

OP posts:

StrangerDays · 08/04/2020 14:29

@Cheeseandwin5 it's not that long ago we were all saying how important it is to be kinder to one another - whatever your thoughts about OP, you may want to reflect on the unnecessary nastiness of your post. Sometimes being so aggressive reflects that you're in a bad place, so I hope you're okay.

Original poster

Chilver · 08/04/2020 14:40

I am still genuinely confused as to the posters saying I am using my child to 'punish' my husband? Was I really supposed to let my child sit with husband and client and/or let them go play as normal touching possibly infected surfaces until they were cleaned? Are the government giving guidance about social distancing and closing playgrounds due to touching of surfaces for no reason?

OP posts:

rjebgf · 08/04/2020 14:43

Your dh sounds moronic

StrangerDays · 08/04/2020 14:45

Ignore them, OP. Sometimes a poster will say something initially as a negative and then a load of others jump on board as an echo chamber, you've done nothing wrong!

The guidelines are clear, and you're at high risk. I would be upset if my husband was so bloody thoughtless to let someone from another household come inside, too.

It wasn't essential, or unavoidable, he was reckless and it's your (and your DCs) health it's risking so it's not a decision he should have taken - what he's done would make anyone upset.

LouLouLoo · 08/04/2020 14:49

Even without underlying conditions, households should not be mixing! Why anyone finds this ambiguous is beyond me.

I would be furious if my husband let anyone into our home at the moment. The more people breach the rules the longer this will all go on for.

Mushypeasandchipstogo · 08/04/2020 14:49

YANBU. Your husband is an absolute idiot and please ignore the trolls such as @cheeseandwin5.

Flip

1 2 3 4