Even extremely intelligent, otherwise logical, people can be truly shocked when they are told that a ventilator is not the right next step for their relative. We are a nation brought up on 'Holby City' and 'Casualty', where everyone who is ill gets taken to hospital, diagnosed, treated and fixed within an hour.
When I started working in ICU, I was truly shocked that there were discussions about the patient who was 'too sick for ICU'. It had never entered my mind, despite qualifying in 2003, that a patient could be 'too sick' for ITU.
Intensive care is barbaric medicine. It causes suffering. It causes pain. It causes distress. It pushes the body to the limit of endurance and forces it to keep going when it has had enough. It is only ethical to give intensive care to patients who might realistically benefit from it in a meaningful way. Otherwise, you are simply denying a patient of a relatively peaceful death.
Many, many relatives spend their hours hoping and pushing for recovery rather than treasuring their last moments with a loved one, because their loved one is in 'Intensive Care', so they think that they will do well. A high proportion of relatives are absolutely blind-sided when they are told that nothing more can be done for their loved one.
I feel for this man, but the reality is that it is unlikely that it was simply a case of 'no ventilator'. He could have been moved to another hospital if necessary.