What has this situation taught you?

[Bearbehind]

Mine are

• Individually, we’re each pretty insignificant
• A lot of day to day shit really doesn’t matter
• There’s somethings that are so far beyond our control it’s pretty much incomprehensible
• There's an awful lot of selfish fuckers out there who think rules don’t apply to them
• There’s an awful lot of people out there who put others before themselves and do what they can to help

How much I hate it!

I realised that the liberalism of Britain that made me feel welcome here, where no one would want to normalise you because everyone is left to their own devices and where no system can possibly work well because it would need to be all-encompassing (not possible in the UK) works so much against the country in the conditions of an epidemic.

That so much work is unnecessary.
Most work meetings are an incredible waste of time.
That I don’t mind seeing other people.
That I don’t miss physical contact with other people, especially all the kissing between friends that became a thing in recent years.
That I can’t cope with my children 24 hours.
Routine is what keeps me motivated, I can’t be arsed to learn new stuff now unfortunately.
That it would have been cheaper to make nursing an attractive career and to support people training to be nurses by not forcing them to do degrees and charging them for the privilege. We’ve then had to rely on agency nurses and poaching foreign nurses. I can’t see how the staff can continue much longer.
That people don’t really care about viruses if they are far away/within a non-western culture.
That you can’t rely on being able to buy stuff, either on the high street or online.
The internet is amazing.
I spend too much time going on holiday and visiting places rather than appreciating where I live and who I live with.
A great way to get people to exercise is to tell them they’re not allowed to.

That we don’t actually need most of the stuff we buy as in terms of clothes, etc, not that we spend a lot on them anyway.

If it were not for this, we’d (DH & I) would probably pop to the shops mid-week before our youngest would finish school just to get something that we ‘needed’ be it a birthday card or i’d ‘need’ a hair serum (even though I’d probably still have about a quarter of one left, just wanting to try another one! We’d probably end up spending triple of what we planned for.

Being in lockdown, you just make do with what you have & suddenly a new top or new make up doesn’t seem that important anymore.

The actual going out for meals or to pubs isn’t something we did regularly anyway so I’m not missing that. I miss & can’t believe I'm saying this but I miss work in a way. I work in a primary school so I would be off at this time anyway but I just miss that little escape of working.

And I make excellent cakes! 😋

That many people are duplicitous.

That I actually love spending time with my wee family 🤷‍♀️ husband and I get on better without the stress of day to day life!
Life can change in a second never take anything for granted!

That I’m a better mum than I thought, when I have less stress going on. So many elements in my life have stopped and I’m calmer and so much more engaged with my toddler especially

It has reminded me that DH is great fun to be around and a really, really wonderful human being.

That family and friends are the most important things in my life. I am blessed to have mine and in the grand scheme of things, nothing else matters.

That, as my elderly mother always used to say, “there’s nowt so queer as folk” to put it mildly! (I have seen some people acting truly awful and downright rude, probably due to their fears - one woman repeatedly and loudly used the f word towards another shopper about his somewhat stunned 12-year-old boy because his social distancing wasn’t quite to her liking. Very sad.)

How much I miss the familiar faces on the school run and how important some of those people have become in a very short period of time.

How much I value the volunteers that run my dc clubs. Swimming, diving, football and rugby. How important they are to my kids.

How selfish people are.

How stupid people can be.

My understanding of maths is no better now than it was when I was at school!

How glad I am that I have a milkman.

How much I need social interaction even though I thought I didn't really like people.

How much I miss someone giving me a hug.

How important exercise is to my mental wellbeing.

How scared I am when the kids are asleep and I realise I'm alone and they look to me for guidance and support and I don't know if I've done a good job that day.

That a hot bath at the end of the day is glorious (shower broke 2 days into isolation).

That I can be content with what I have and quite enjoy mending and making do.

That staying home is great actually, but I would go mad if I didn't have my wee garden.

Parenting 24/7 is fucking hard but there are a few good moments in amongst the nagging and moaning. I'm trying to concentrate on those.

Practically: I've learned Twitter because of DS school, how to put up shelves, how to mend a hole in my top. Currently learning how to build a (very rickety) greenhouse out of scrap wood.

Watching too much news is baaaaaad for my MH.

That I’m much more introverted than I realised

That my kids are brilliant and chilled without school

That I really must divorce my husband

That my lonely life is now 1000 times worse as I think work was more important to me than I realised

Waking at 5am worrying about things and having no-one to cry to/with (been single a long time)

Discovering the area around me, and that I don't always need to hop on a train to London to find something to do

I feel like I only have one friend in the world. Everyone else in my family has someone. Except my mum, and she is 250 fucking miles away and I am not even allowed to travel to see her. The last time I saw her, I'd left her in a hospital bed as had to come back to work. She's out now but god I wish I could be there to look after her.

That I have a daughter in the same town as me and she barely gets in touch.

That it's important to appreciate the life I have - in work, happily married, with two kids and no real financial worries
That a lot of the socialising I used to do was not because I really liked all of these people but for fear of missing out
That my children are much happier without school than I expected

How much stress I put myself under due to socialising with others.

Life is quiet but I am not chastising myself for the tactless comment I made or stupid quip I made. I quite like it.

That winning the lottery would actually make me happy, I love being at home with my family it's work that makes me miserable, so if I didn't need the money I really think I would be happy for ever.

• Being around your family 24/7 sucks
• I love working remotely
• Life looks empty without the hobbies (my beloved photography had been taken away since people cancel their meetings and lots of shows, etc)
• Learning something may be funny. I know now how to make a photo look old and scratched! Well done, Covid, I usually have no time to practice that
• I WANT A DOG. Even more than before, I mean
• The internet is boring once it becomes your only entertainment

How well DH and I actually get on, when the day to day stresses of rushing around to get to work/school/meetings (and all associated stress) are removed from the equation. We've gone back to basics again in some ways and it's been quite nice.

Also how funny my kids are! When we aren't with them much (due to working full time), we miss out on so many little things. Like the funny little comments they make, the way the youngest sings to herself whenever she's concentrating, and just playing without feeling like you need to be doing x,y,z like everyone else.

It's also confirmed how much of a homebody I am

1. That my kids (two teens and a five year old) are ridiculously resilient
2. That I take too much for granted
3. That we never really have as much control as we think
4. That I am far more adaptable than I ever knew
5. That my little family all get on really well and are very tolerant of eachother
6. That I don't need to keep going out all the time - there's actually a lot to do at home
7. That I have wonderful family, friends and work colleagues and I'm surprised how much I miss them
8. Some people just can't abide my rules and regulations ...however serious the implications are
9. What my 5 year old learns during a school day
10. How much I loved my work and cared for my students
11. How lucky we are to have social media/face time etc

1. How unbelievably lucky we are - I knew this but this global situation has put it into sharp focus - to be financially secure, to live in a peaceful land, with a great NHS, to live in a lovely home in the beautiful countryside and have green fields, clean air and abundance of food and clean water.

2. How resilient we are as a family - we have been through tough times with our health and that of one of our kids (who had a transplant) and in a way it has set us up to be able to keep a lid on the worry of Covid 19 and know that ‘this too shall pass’.

3. How much money we normally waste on ‘just nipping into town’ or online shopping. How little we actually need in terms of clothes and material stuff.

4. How great it is having a milkman.

5. How I’d forgotten how to truly slow down. How much I enjoy having less pressure and less expectations.

6. How important exercise is to me, I feel so much better (mentally and physically) when I move my body.

That we absolutely could make significant changes in our behaviour in order to save the planet

@Bargebill19 Thank you for all the work you do. I'm not a keyworker but my partner is, and they work in care homes, mainly, with the elderly and vulnerable (we're both ex-NHS).

We have been beyond horrified at the way that those working in, living in, and serving care homes are being treated. Frontline NHS is well, the frontline, but there are many other environments that need support too.

I ended my previous post with a joke about loo roll, but we didn't stockpile (we had - note, had - a regular subscribe and save which had been delivered literally just before Lockdown started, and we're both prepared, if necessary, to, er, adapt, especially if it means that more vulnerable people can have what they need). Like you, I've been beyond disbelieving at the way some people have been behaving.

On a slighty separate note, I don't wish Boris any ill, despite my intense dislike of the man and his party's policies, but I do hope, if he comes through his illness, that the penny might finally drop about things like PPE.

Thank you again.

Three years ago we increased our mortgage by £100,000 just to move to a nicer area. New house is slightly smaller. We are really appreciating this now we are in lockdown - having a pleasant view outside, and a garden to relax in, has made all the difference.

I know we are incredibly privileged and my heart goes out to people living in flats in run-down housing estates (like where we used to live).

Empress mcschnozzle - thank you.

I hope Boris survives too. No ill feeing for him as a person.

Today we’ve not received our deliveries of milk, fruit or vegetables. I’ve spent the morning trying to find alternative supplies.
We now have flimsy aprons to wear, but no hand gel and we are rationing soap. Disposable surgical masks are having to last us one per person per week minimum, preferably longer. We are supposed to have supplies of disposable mops - we don’t.
The number of deaths in this industry are reaching horrific numbers, but they aren’t reported. Staff are trying really really hard. But no we have to accept new hospital cases ....... No one wants to catch this virus, staff, residents alike.
We feel we are just sitting and waiting for the virus to just walks in through the doors like an army. It’s no longer a case of ‘if’ we get it but ‘when’ will it hit us and who are we likely to lose.

That I need more red wine in the house. I have none currently and won't go out, specifically, for some.

That I was wise to put money into a savings account for a rainy day.

That the village I find boring in the muddy winter is a good place to be in a pandemic.