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Original poster

Ex won’t have kids until lockdown is over

21 replies

biggirlknickers · 30/03/2020 15:54

That’s it really.

He says it will increase the risk of transmitting the virus to him and his family.

Anyone else is a similar situation? Is this even a reasonable position? They are his kids! They normally spend 2 nights a week at his house. They see it as their other home.

OP posts:
Dljen · 30/03/2020 16:14

Im currently 22 weeks pregnant and my children havnt seen there dad for 2 weeks (my choice) I am very worried they will catch the virus and/or pass it onto me.He is still working with the public so that's the reason I am so worried.If you and your children are staying at home and away from other people though I wouldnt of thought there would be much possibility of passing anything on.As far as the government guidelines on the current lockdown children under the age of 18 are still allowed to go between homes to see there mums/dad's .

tenterden · 30/03/2020 16:21

Well, he is technically correct. What does his family consist of? Is there any chance his partner is pregnant and they haven't told people yet? Anyone vulnerable?

It must be frustrating but I think you will have to suck it up. I would possibly ask for increased CM for the duration though?

Hannah021 · 30/03/2020 16:24

interesting post! you're officially the only lady i saw wants her kids to go to their father, and the father is refusing...

are his family vulnerable?

CallmeAngelina · 30/03/2020 16:26

him and his family.

do your kids not qualify as his family too, then?

MonkeyToesOfDoom · 30/03/2020 16:26

Up til today I've had to take my daughter to the ex. I've hated it. It puts her and me and my ex and their family at risk.
I know the government says you can, but I'd only move kids between homes if it was absolutely unavoidable.

norajanelane · 30/03/2020 16:27

My children have both been to their dads. I have two 4 year olds and the youngest has SEN, he thrives off routine and needs to see his dad. Luckily there's just me and the children in our house I aren't working at the minute and his dad lives alone and their dad has been working from home for around 2 weeks.

The Govt guidance says children can move between the homes of separated parents. I suppose it's dependent on the situation you're in. I don't have to worry about step children or partners or any other families. So I don't have to worry about them coming into contact with anyone else.

I drop them off at his door on a Friday night and he drops them back at mine on Monday. I'll continue with this unless anything changes.

pinkunicorn20 · 30/03/2020 16:28

Exh wont see our kids until this is over, we agreed this together. It's not worth the increased risk of germ spreading.
Truthfully hes never been the most proactive in maintaining regular contact anyway but at least we are on the same page for this.

Hippofrog · 30/03/2020 16:28

Why would you want to put your kids at greater risk?

blackcat86 · 30/03/2020 16:28

We wont be seeing teen DSS until this is all over. He lives 2hrs away and stays EOWish. We have a toddler and I have asthma. DSS thought it was fine to go out daily to browse the shops, his mum went on about how she had flu but went to work the next day, their flat is dirty and cluttered and they live in a high footfall central location. I wont risk it. I would rather we all live through this and can do something nice afterwards like a holiday. We've all had lots of video chats in the meantime. TBF we also havent seen either set of GPs due to their risk factors either.

Mysocalledlifexx · 30/03/2020 16:36

Kids are better staying in one house not going from one to another, your ex is right.

iheartislesofwight · 30/03/2020 16:47

i'd want dc to stay with me given the situation.

Oldbutstillgotit · 30/03/2020 17:11

Although DC are allowed to go between their parents, it is better if they stay in one house to reduce the possibility of contracting Coronavirus. Do you not want them to be as safe as possible? My DD has told her ex that DGS won’t be visiting him until the lockdown is over . Ex is usually a bit of an arse but he is totally in agreement with this.

yatapina · 30/03/2020 17:16

Yes, it's reasonable given the circumstances.

It is safer for all of you to have them stay in one home.

SnoozyLou · 30/03/2020 17:42

He's right. Plus it also doubles your household's risk of catching it too.

Flummingbird · 30/03/2020 18:20

I know it's so much safer not to send them but after 10 days home alone with DD(3yo) I'm really struggling and debating sending her to her dads for a couple of days. I'm getting so snappy and my mood is so low, it's so draining and not fair on her. I just don't know what to do for the best Sad

GaraMedouar · 30/03/2020 18:22

My kids are not seeing their respective dads at the moment. They are speaking on phone and Face timing . Just cuts risk down.

PumpkinP · 30/03/2020 18:24

Personally I would rather keep my kids at home in this situation anyway, I wouldn’t send them to exes, as it’s stands he hasn’t seen them for 3 years anyway so moral of the story, you can’t make anyone have their kids if they don’t want to

givemeacall · 30/03/2020 18:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BarbedBloom · 30/03/2020 18:41

I think it is reasonable. It could be that his partner is pregnant or vulnerable in some other wayv

canigooutyet · 30/03/2020 18:48

It would depend on if the family are on the risk group.
If no issues and they can be moved between households whilst still maintaining social distancing, I would go for it. It could be their daily walk or bike ride.

RishiSunakFanClub · 30/03/2020 18:56

It seems totally reasonable in the current circumstances.

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