My husband has said I can quit my job if I want to.

[QueenofmyPrinces]

I’m a nurse, obviously anxious about what dangers and nightmares lie ahead, and my DH has just said that I don’t have to go to work if I don’t want to, and he’d rather us live on just one wage if it meant I could be kept safe.

Has anyone else working in hospitals ever felt so nervous about what’s to come that they’d consider leaving?

Everyone is praising the NHS and it’s staff right now, but has anyone (in power) ever really appreciated them before. I know I certainly felt undervalued. The NMC never even asked my reasons for leaving, such is the value that is placed on one nurse.

I have worked on my current ward for about 10 years but that’s in two blocks. After 3 years on the ward something happened that mentally made me feel like I just couldn’t stay so I got another job. When I handed in my notice not one of my Managers (3 of the them) asked me why - there was just no concern at all as to why one of their nurses was leaving. I returned to the ward about another 3 years later and have been there ever since.

One of our Matrons once told us that we are all replaceable so she doesn’t care if someone wants to leave.

It’s really charming isn’t it.

You should leave. Honestly. You don't need our permission. Or anyone's.
Sorry but they need to get army in. They are trained to face death. Not you

It’s just so messed up.

My husband is so passionate about the lockdown, he is sticking to the guidelines like glue, keeping himself and our sons in the house in order to do his best to keep everyone safe. But what’s the point?

I’m probably in close proximity to about 75 people each time I go to work so although it’s good my DH/DC are isolating to protect others, they themselves aren’t being kept safe at all because of me.

You should leave. Honestly. You don't need our permission. Or anyone's.
Sorry but they need to get army in. They are trained to face death. Not you

This has so much wrong with it I don’t know where to start. How many trained nurses do you think the army’s got?

Our daughter is an ITU nurse, she loses patients every week, she knows that will happen, it goes with the territory. She’s worked 12 hour shifts this week and is being accommodated in a hotel and not allowed to go home. Her hands are falling apart. And still she smiles.

'Our daughter is an ITU nurse, she loses patients every week, she knows that will happen, it goes with the territory. She’s worked 12 hour shifts this week and is being accommodated in a hotel and not allowed to go home. Her hands are falling apart. And still she smiles.'

*Also there were four people in AE today. FOUR.
And there are empty beds on every ward.

The hospital feels more like an actual functioning working hospital instead of a sort of community building with cafe with members of public wandering around blocking corridors so the emergency teams can't get past , asking for updates when we are working at the computers checking investigations.
Much more efficient. An actual hospital instead of being full of ' visitors' filling up the car parks and wards expecting to speak to doctors while they are busy working.
And the sheer reduction in admissions is amazing. Something has to change when this is all over.*

It's absolutely extraordinary. Whole wards are empty. Apparently my hospital is just over 50% bed occupancy, in preparation for what they think will be needed. I haven't a clue where all these patients have gone. Today someone was discharged who has been occupying a hospital bed for TWO years. I have no idea what was achieved today that was impossible to achieve over the past two years.
And whenever I look at the A&E admissions there seem to be about ten people there, compared to queueing down the corridors just a months ago.

Ok @AlexaAmbidextra .....plz show me which of my posts have been particularly nasty. I’m going to bed soon as up early for another shift from hell. Stay safe people x

@Alsohuman... god bless her, I can’t sleep but am up in less than 8 Hours. Hugs for hercxxxx

OP, I haven't read the last few pages of responses, but whatever you decide, reading all the news stories is really unhelpful and anxiety inducing for everyone and particularly to you in your circumstances. It's just not a good idea now. Switch off, only focus on the main news and on what affects you directly, i.e. the situation in your trust and local area. Otherwise it's extremely easy to become overwhelmed and this would be unhelpful now. Take care 💐

@FannyCann

The hospitals are empty because they have cancelled all planned admissions.

Eg those who were expecting to have a hip replacement, Knee surgery, a heart bypass or cataract surgery.

They don’t want to do these procedures because they might need a space in ICU.

It’s only maternity care and some cancer treatment that’s going ahead.
All these Patients will still need treated after this is over, waiting lists will be longer.

"doggybiccys" you seem really angry, you should support our colleagues. As a frontline nurse I am Manning my position as are most of my colleagues however, some people cannot deal with the situation. Have the compassion I am sure you afford your patient's.

It's not just cancelled elective surgery - the tsunami of visitors who visit aren't in either.

@Doggybiccys

If only everyone had your work ethic. You should be commended for you outlook to your role. We could do with more people that share your attitude

Look for another job that would use your training, occupational health is well paid or consider applying to a private hospital, most patients there are in for routine operations & don't stay in for long, I don't blame you for wanting to leave when staff can't be provided with adequate PPE, it must make a hard job even harder.

I think all this clapping for the NHS stuff and all this glorification of NHS workers that is suddenly happening is because people are worried that NHS workers will quit once the death rate soars and it all becomes to dangerous and too much. There is no danger money paid and no war widow salary given to the family of NHS worker that dies. I think the government will need to start giving NHS workers some sort of carrot in order to avoids mass walkouts because no job is worth risking your life or your family’s life for.

@Nat6999 I don’t think that will work right now as all nurses are being redeployed to help the pandemic.

Queen, YOU and your family are your first priority. A job comes second. My husband left the NHS because of the appalling conditions, he now works in private healthcare - earns much more, better conditions, managers are nicer. He is happier. NHS workers are not martyrs and they’re not cannon fodder either. The absolute hypocrisy of a Government slashing and slashing at the NHS and sectors that feed into it, blocking pay rises, making staff pay extortionate parking... then asking you to risk your life. I say fuck that. Most NHS staff I know are furious. Of course you all went the best for your patients and want to help others - you wouldn’t be doing this job otherwise! Not wanting to engager yourself doesn’t mean you’re not fit for the job, what an absolute crock of shit.

....reading all the news stories is really unhelpful and anxiety inducing for everyone and particularly to you in your circumstances. It's just not a good idea now.

I wish I could avoid it. Death rates and percentages of infected medical staff is always the hot topic at work. Every single member of staff feels uneasy and panicked so there’s no ‘safe place’ to disappear to.

When the Government announced last week that letters would be sent out to the most vulnerable stating they must isolate for 12 weeks I can’t tell you how many staff were praying they’d get one.

We do try and keep morale up whilst we are there and we put on smiles for our patient, we joke amongst ourselves, have light hearted chats about various things happening in our lives etc but it’s just a front. Underneath everything is the undercurrent of panic.

We have oncology patients on our wards who are being treated by doctors who 10 minutes previous were in a Covid Bay with nothing but a flimsy paper mask over their face. There aren’t enough doctors, there aren’t enough nurses and the health (and lives) of staff and patients is like walking on a tightrope. I can’t imagine how quickly the virus is spending throughout the hospital as a result of poor PPE and disorganised care.

I was watching a news item yesterday and there was a fantastic doctor talking, and not holding back, about how disgusting it is that staff aren’t being protected from the virus and tested for it when we are on the frontline as we are probably causing the contamination rates to multiply through no fault of our own.

I have since read though that frontline staff are going to be tested now but it feels like too little too late.

I don’t want to leave, I love being a nurse, I love my job but watching the chaos unfold with no real consideration for the patients and staff is both demoralising and petrifying.

The absolute hypocrisy of a Government slashing and slashing at the NHS and sectors that feed into it, blocking pay rises, making staff pay extortionate parking... then asking you to risk your life. I say fuck that.

Exactly. We’ve been treated like shit for God knows how long and now suddenly we’re all angels, we are the answer, we are all expected to risk our health and our lives and we all deserve a clap for doing it. When I saw the footage of Boris Johnson clapping I swear I wanted to throw my TV out the window.

I used to have to pay £30 a week just to park my car. It took me 2.5 years to get a parking pass and that’s even taking into account that I live in a different county to where I work.

Like I said, I love my job but the disdain the Government has shown towards us, and the disregard our employers and managers have for us, it’s no surprise that nurses are leaving the profession and I think this Pandemic will be the last straw for many.

OP, what you do is absolutely amazing and you've been really brave to go into work knowing you're putting your own family at risk. However, if your gut is telling you to leave, then please do and don't feel guilty about it. I'm a teacher and am expected to look after key worker's children. We have absolutely no additional protection, schools aren't being deep-cleaned, there are still 20-30 per class and the school environment is a breeding ground. I can't tell you how delighted I was when my GP told me to stay at home for 12 weeks. I absolutely did not want to put my own children at risk by mixing with other peoples'. My anxiety was, and has been, through the roof. I was petrified at the prospect of having to go into school. Good luck OP, I hope you make the right decision for you!!

I also worry about how many nurses we’ll retain through this and afterwards. There is a lot of talk about kindness at work but not much in evidence. We’re losing most of our specialist oncology workforce in the next week to care for covid patients. These people are the safety net for the many cancer patients on outpatient treatment. There will be a tiny skeleton staff to triage calls, manage symptoms and arrange interventions and treatment. And hold the patients whose treatment is on hold and disease progressing. And the senior management want to take that workforce for covid too. No acknowledgement of safety risk and not even a thank you.

A cancer patient on tv last night whose prostate surgery had been indefinitely postponed said that cancer patients were being sacrificed for covid patients, and he had a point!

There are 4 hour sessions running (2 hours on paperwork!) on how to care for inpatients, iv refreshers etc for nurses who don’t normally work in that setting. Some haven’t worked on wards for decades. To be done in groups of 50!! Staff who have attended so far say it’s cramped and rushed. A covid risk in itself.

Not to mention travelling to work on packed public transport, the almost constant exposure to the virus, no testing facility. Reams of staff on full pay at home not doing much work while the clinical teams have steam coming out of years. Corporate nursing staff tweeting all day about pride and almost a level of excitement, like it’s a fucking great How fucking lovely to have time at work to do Twitter.

They are utterly in panic about this and there was very little planning for it, despite us having 2 months to get ready.

We’ve said we could cope if we knew it was for a month but this thing will run on for many months.

I’ll also have a very short fuse for downing tools and walking away. So don’t feel you’re alone.

It's completely understandable you're feeling angry at how you've been treated for years and at BoJo's and the Conservative's hypocrisy right now. It doesn't help in a situation where so much weight is put on your shoulders. I really would ignore him now, I completely understand why you wanted to throw your TV out. Know that we know that you guys (NHS nurses) should have been treated better, more should have been invested in your wages, training and recruitment over the years. We (as patients) are on the same side as you and can only hope that despite all this you won't leave en masse right now. That is the honest truth. I think the fear of not being cared for properly for reasons mentioned above has been present amongst people in some areas for a while. Some have already received poor treatment and I understand there's a lot of reasons behind that. This fear is obviously increased now. I have hope and trust in you all (nurses) because you deserve it much more than BoJo. This guy better changes his ways and invests & rewards you better, I think we'd all agree on this point without a doubt.

I’m with you you @QueenofmyPrinces as soon as this is over I’m leaving. The absolute lack of leadership and disgraceful attitude towards staff who are worried about lack of PPE is terrible.

@I0NA Stopping elective procedures in no way adds up to 50% hospital capacity! Our elective orthopaedic ward is the smallest in the hospital with 18 beds. They stopped elective stuff a week ago and are now filled with trauma as one of the trauma wards (about 34 beds iirc) has closed and is being repurposed for additional respiratory + more ICU.

From someone who works in community were working extra hours and pulling in staff in order to care for patients at home who have been discharged earlier than they should. Children and adults. Community staff are working hard to support the hospitals