Hello all - I'm curled up on sofa ignoring the sunshine outside, after having an ERPC yesterday at 9 weeks. We found out last Saturday at a private 'reassurance' scan and I feel like the last few days have just been whirlwind of appointments, phone calls, scans, decisions, tears, blood tests and lots and lots of internet searching.
Physically, I feel ok, I seem to be recovering from the op well and my bleeding has subsided a lot just in the one day. Emotionally, well...I'm unpredictable - the prospect of actually talking to a real live person, a good friend, feels too much especially if they're going to be sympathetic. So far I've mostly been in contact with my mum and best friends via text message or email.
I've found reading this thread really helpful in not allowing myself to get despondent. I know that we'll start again TTC, and seeing the list of everyone else whose made that decision - and some who have been successful - is heartening. I have this support in real life too, but I'm aware that my two closest friends who knew about this pg and mc both have their own fertility issues as well.
So...I'm 36, have a DS who will turn 2 next weekend and I have PCOS, was taking metformin to regulate cycles when I conceived and will go back onto this in a couple of days. This is my second mc, the first was extremely early at 5.5 weeks and didn't need any treatment, I conceive DS after two cycles following that. This one was what they used to call 'blighted ovum', there was absolutely no sign that any embryo had developed at all, just an empty sac - still fooled my body into having all the symptoms though and no hint that anything was amiss until we saw the scan.
I think it's this that freaks me out the most. This feeling that symptoms don't mean a thing is very depressing, especially for someone like me who likes to at least pretend she knows what's going on with her own body.
Hey ho. Onward and upward.
I'd appreciate it if someone could put me in the waiting TTC list, I'm planning to do a few cheapie tests to check hormone levels are down and start temping to see if/when I ovulate after all this. As far as I know we'll then start again, unless I don't feel up to it.