So what happens now?

[Lizzzombie]

I have a DS (2.5) who was concieved by accident. I daftly thought that getting pregnant again would be totally easy.
So far its been 6 months and not a bean. I am totally regular and always have been, and have not been on the pill for a vast amount of time in my life so its not like I have a back up of chemicals that I am waiting to pass iykwim.

Anyway, so I came on last night after convincing myself this month was different.

I don't know what the next step is though.
At what point do you go to the Drs and say "help?"
At what point do I/DP get tested? How much is that going to cost?

At what point will everyone I know stop asking me when we are going to have another baby?!

And it doesn't help that I work in a well known babycare retailer, so my customers even ask me if I am trying to get pregnant again etc.

Can anyone point me into the direction of a step by step guide of what happens next?

If you're 35 or over its usually advised to visit the doctor after 6 months of ttc without success. Would urge you to go and have a chat asap.

Both of you should now be tested further; simple investigative tests can be done to start with (on the other hand the GP may well decide to refer you anyway). These include a semen analysis for him (that test should always be repeated) and blood tests for you.
In the early initial stages at least you are safer under the NHS.

Subfertility is not the sole preserve of the woman; it is important that both of you are tested in tandem early on.

For us we had to keep trying for a year before the GP would carry out any fertility tests. Then I went for a sperm analysis. That is important becasue there is no point in you taking fertility drugs if DH/DP is not fertile. Then when I was given the all clear DW went for basic tests such as ultrasound to scan her ovaries. Even if you got pregnant easily first time things can change. On the other hand 6 months is not that long even though it feels an age.

However, that was a decade ago and women seem to be getting put on Clomid much earlier and much more quickly now as it is a fairly quick and easy first step after the initial tests have been carried out.

Others will have more recent experience.

Thanks for your quick replies to me - much appreciated.

Can I just ask. The GP tests you have mentioned - are they free of charge on the NHS or will we have to pay for them?

Any tests your GP sends you and DP/DH will be free of charge on the NHS. Good luck.

Yes all ours were free.

Its only the later stages of IVF that people have to pay I believe but varies from area to area. Your GP would answer those questions but you are a long way away from that stage yet.

You will probably have to have been trying for a year at least before your GP will refer you to your NHS fertility clinic. My advice would be to lie to the doctor about how long you have been trying. Say a year instead of six months.

The GP should (as others have said) offer you blood tests and your DH should go to his GP and ask for a sperm test to be done.

Try to find out what the age restrictions are at your IVF clinic as some won't see women under or over a certain age. You need to get refered before they will do anything like prescribe clomid or check your tubes etc.

Where I am if you're over 37.5 at the point of referal then you don't get a free go at IVF. I have been prescribed Clomid but anything beyond that (IUI/IVF) I will have to fund myself because I was refered 2 months too late.

Having said all that try not to panic as it's only been 6 months and you do have time.

Hi, just wanted to add, don't panick

My 1st ds was concieved easily by accident and it took us 7 months to concieve number 2.

Anything up to a year is considered 'normal' when ttc.

Have you tried temping/ovulation predictor kits etc?

Am totally new to this, so have no idea what a temping/ovulation predictor is. Will look into them.

Thanks for your tips.

We went to our doc after 6 months of trying to conceive number 2, we lied and said it had been a year as I was 37 at the time. Anyway they were great and referred us to the infertility clinic at the hospital straightaway, we got all our tests and scans etc - all free - and all came back okay. We are still trying and are now about to start IUI (on the NHS) with 4 cycles free, so its worth looking into it. Also though, 6 months isn't long to have been trying, don't give up hope....its very frustrating I know, its been over a year now and I wonder if my son will ever have a wee sis or brother....good luck...

Lizzzombie I would recommend "Taking care of your fertility" which is a really useful book talking about temping and all other fertility signs so you can BD at the right time, and also it shows you how fertile you are (in some ways). You can record the data and take it with you to the docs which is really useful as for instance, if you're clearly ovulating and your luteal phase is ok, they are unlikely to put you on clomid and you may focus on getting your partner tested first. On the other hand if you are not ovulating, they can target that. It's all in the book - loads of people here recommend it.

Personally I would say if you are 31 and after just 6 months, I would not panic - try to just relax about things and give it a few more months at least before starting to think about tests.

Like someone said above, I've heard it's normally a year before GPs would consider it to be a problem; and I've also read somewhere that around 7 months is considered "average" (which means of course for some people it could take several months more, without there necessarily being a problem).

Also, having lots of tests etc will just make you more stressed about it and that itself could make it harder to conceive; so better if you can to just chill for a bit longer, time is still on your side. Good luck!

I'd second the advice to get to know your own cycle and keep a record of it (and the TCOYF book is fab). It lets you feel that you're 'doing' something, rather than just passively waiting to get pregnant, and if there is a problem it can help to highlight it.

I'm in a very similar position to you (DS of 26 months, been TTC2 for 6 months). My charts show that I've got a very short luteal phase, and although it might not be a problem (the medical jury's still out), my GP agreed to refer me to a gynae earlier than normal because I could demonstrate that there might be a problem, IYKWIM. Without the charts I'm pretty sure he'd have sent me away and told me to keep trying for a bit longer.