Feisty & Fabulous at 40+ - the continuing adventures of TTC

[fruitbowl]

Erm hope this will do as a continuation thread. Hello to anyone new to the thread. All welcome... xx

What's up VSF? I'm sorry you feel tired and hormonal. Is it just work piling up?
I'm on the pill - microgynon - did I say that?!?! [comes over all senile]
It's OK, but for the past two days I have been feeling really lethargic and negative and anxious. I'm trying to talk myself out of it with affirmations, but I'm not sure if they are doing anything. I don't know, I might be feeling worse if I didn't do them.
Have you had a holiday yet VSF??
You never know clomid might make you feel better, not everyone has negative side-effects.
Fingers crossed for this cycle, for both of us.

Just dropping in to hand round some home-made choccy truffles! These will smooth out our ups and downs and calm all the "what if"s and "maybe"s and taste bloody great!

Rowing (with a light, affectionate clout of handbag). I feel that the counsellor gave you negative vibes. Watch out I'm mounting my high horse (oh that sounded wrong) as I'm training to be a counsellor and you're right, she should be listening and empathising. She's not paid to have an opinion!! Grrrr! (and dismount)

Can you go to someone else? Or are you only doing it short term.

Fifi - I think me n you have been hanging out on that same corner (although I'm not sure if you've been swigging cider like me). I keep looking at DDs baby stuff and am slow-l-y slowly giving bits away. So hard isn't it? Well done for doing it (extra truffle)

xx

fruitbowl - yummm thanks. Have a vision of you standing in a kitchen covered in cocoa powder at this moment!

That's right TFLS - but I've licked it all off now! Night night, night owls...

Everyone seems a little down right now, including me. The last couple in our NCT group for DS has just had their second child, and we are the only ones in the group who haven't - one is even pregnant with her third! But I'm trying not to let me bummed-outedness get in the way of feeling happy for them all.

Hmph!

Hope you're all feeling a bit happier in the morning.

Thanks for the choccys! Yes Fruit - it is hard but you know I saw a friend and her 3 week old yesterday and thought I was dreading it I actually felt OK. Baby was sweet and lovely and it was lovely to hold a lovely wriggly baby but my DD was there running around and playing and I felt so much joy at seeing her have fun. I think I am slowly coming to terms with not having another one now.

I can't say I am over it but slow slow slowly getting there.

Hello everyone,

Fruitbowl thank you for the truffle v kind.

Must keep positive and remember my favourite word 'hope' (I'm telling myself more than any of you) sorry Fifitot what is 2ww? I concieved naturally at 45+4mnths and I am certain it was just my bad health that lost me that one and remember Cherie Blair (rather selfishly I'd like you not to give up but you must do what is best for you). I'm really onto being in the best health possible now. I saw the programme and was very uplifted by it - it's actually given me more time. Programme makers definatley have their own agenda well they have to sell it to the moneymen. Loved the Indian Doc who said danger is everywhere every time you get in a car you could die (especially DH says in India) I so feel at least these babies are wanted - so much better to be wanted and loved by an older family than never wanted and abused by anyone young-or old. Not to be on a downer but last yr I heard of a 24yo who died in childbirth 2nd DD - there are no cerainties so what do we do carry on living or shake in a corner?

Fatladyscreams yes TCM is traditional Chinese Medicine it can be pricey, though mine isn't as bad as some but my Dr treated a 46 who had 1st DS at 47 so not impossible - again the emphasis is on good general health better here he says than China.
I did go on Sat and he also said in China if you want to concieve be around babies so Fifitot holding one could be a great bit of luck - yes I love all that stuff (I'll try it all) here's to positive thinking I keep telling myself "I am pg" am I unhinged or just looking on the sunny side?

two week wait - that awful time you spend analysing the signs after ovulation and before your period due!

Morning everyone. Here's hoping for a more positive week for us all - a little bit of sunshine wouldn't go amiss either. I don't think all these grey clouds are helping our mood.

Thanks for that SummerSky. I felt so much better after last week's session and have another one booked in for this Thursday. Not sure if it's the accupuncture or just the sensation of taking control and doing something - but who cares if it makes you feel better hey!

Glad holding your friend's baby was OK fifitot - you've got it out of the way.

Kiwikat - that must be very mixed feelings. Here's hoping your time will come soon.

fruitbowl - I lost 2lbs over the weekend (fatlady is trying to be less fat) so bless you for your zero calorie truffles! Now can you just rustle up some zero calorie wine for me (fatlady does her best cheeky, hopeful face)??

Love the idea of zero calerie wine! Am munching on a carrot as I type this, bent on becoming less hefty - I'm convinced that my being a stone lighter when I conceived ds had a bit to do with it. That and being four years younger, of course ...

What's the latest on the acupuncture - who was trying that? And who was trying the nasty-tasting TCM, which made them feel amazing? My memory has gone out the window.

Hi all - just back from college reunion. 25 years since graduation. Great fun but a reminder of how the years are flying by.

Starting to brick it a bit about tomorrow's session at the clinic. Summer the tests I had were all blood tests measuring hormone levels and another one to make sure I was ovulating.

First session at the clinic me and DH both have to attend - we assume that is so they can check that we are in this together as it were.

While I was away DH sold DD's travel system to his cousin who is expecting DC. So that's a bit more gone.

I think there must be something going round as AF arrived early for me too.

Hope everyone's feeling a bit more upbeat and thanks for the choccie Fruit

Evening everyone,
Really sorry about my appalling spelling. I'm doing the vile herbs at the mo Kiwi and the acup really chills me out - I do get very anxious about things. I also read Randine Lewis book (amongst others)

FLS I agree just feeling that you are taking a bit of control is important - I've dawdled for too long so now I'm like a jack russell with a trouser leg, I'm going to do everything I can to not let this one go - then at least I can say I tried.

Glad to see you back Spiral I'm sending DH to Docs tomorrow to ask about tests - I'll write them down for him that way I don't have to see her disapproving face. I have had 3 concurrent MC but no investigations due to my age. (I hate GP's I feel I'd get more help and sympathy from the milkman)

Good Luck with the clinic tomorrow is it NHS or private? Have you had the test results back already or do you get them there?

Must go now and take herbs also on CD10 so I suppose BD should start.
V Happy to see the sun today at least some washing dried.

Best of luck for tomorrow, Spiral.

Just saying hi before going away for a few days. Glad you all enjoyed the chocs.

I have taken on board TFLS's request and am now serving zero calorie / non hangover wine. Drink as much as you want! Red or white. Would you prefer an ice cold chablis or a tasty cabernet sauvignon? Coming right up!

See you all soon x

Hi everyone - just got back from a week in Corfu. Gorgeous!
Summersky - hi I am still here, but as you see have been away. I am going the the Chinese dr for my next visit on Monday. Have finished all of round 1 of the vile herbs and must say I seriously feel a difference. So I am optimistic and willing to take the next dose. Will update you after the appointment.

Grownup that's great about the herbs doing such a good job. It's onwards and upwards!

Fruit [lightly cuffs with clutch purse] where are you off to?
I didn't know you were training as a counsellor, is that outside your regular job.
You are right of course - I did an intro to counselling at work and I know she isn't supposed to be giving so much 'advice'. Funnily, another woman on another forum had trouble with this counsellor. Apparently, she was very insensitive to this woman, when she was feeling very vulnerable.
I'm thinking of cancelling the next appointment and asking the nurses about changing. I know it would get back to the original counsellor, so perhaps I could leave feedback, hopefully she can improve her methods.
Spiral, hope the clinic is helpful and you feel better informed after. Let us know how you get on.
Summer that's funny sending your DH. I don't know if I could trust my DP with that kind of information. He would probably come back with a prescription for athletes foot.
TFLS what kind of diet are you following? I'm off to acupuncture next week, not sure what to expect, but let's give it a whirl.
Fifi that's great about the baby. I think you can surprise yourself sometimes with they way you react. I find the thought of meeting pg friends/family worse than the reality by a long chalk.
Kiwi how's the escape plan going, is that on back burner for now?
VSF any side-effects yet??
I'm just off to relexology - one of my friends does it, so a nice natter and a bit of chilling.
Sat up late last night watching 'The Dark Knight', so knackered today. Bit sad seeing Health Ledger, he was an amazing Joker, but not a lot of laughs.

Ah, it was Grownup who had the amazing change after the yucky herbs! Do they make you feel good too, Summer?

Rowing, we're still hankering to escape but really don't know what to do about it, so are doing nothing. Classic avoidance.

Enjoy your hols, Fruit.

Spiral, how'd you get on?

Fatlady, really interested to hear more about the acupuncture - and from anyone else re this. If we don't manage it this round, then I'm going to sign up for a course.

CD22 and symptom spotting like crazy (although there aren't any to spot). I was on Facebook just now and realised that a friend back in NZ was p with her 2nd, then the next person below her is p, and the one beneath HER - three in a row! But to my credit, I didn't get upset. I think I'm starting to realise that other people's pregnancies aren't anything to do with me, and that they're not 'using up' all the available babies.

Yay for rational thought!

Hi everyone

Hope the clinic goes OK today Spriral.

Summersky - you made me burst out laughing. I have this very worrying mental image of you as the jack russell !

fruitbowl - hope you have a good couple of days and thanks for the vino. Anything white and chilled suits me - you can tell I'm a choosey type of girl!

Hope you've bought some sun back from Corfu, grownupbabes (looks up hopefully...)

rowing boat and kiwikat - I've only had one session of accupuncture so can't talk from much experience but I'm really looking forward to the next (this Wednesday). My lady is also a herbalist but so far no evil tasting herbs for me (touches wood). I went to see her after my m/c as apparently it is very effective at realigning the body. That evening I was a bit tearful (but a light, relaxed sort of tears, very strange). The next morning I woke up calm and not unhappy - the first time this had happened since the m/c. I'm generally just trying to eat healthily (low GI type diet with loads of fruit and veg) and my lady agreed that this was important. I am pretty overweight - I've lost 1.5 stones but a lot more to go and the accupuncturist did say that losing the weight quickly would really help. So I'm now obsessed with the scales as well as TCC. At least my obsessions have company! [wink}

Applaud your rational thought Kiwikat. I have never noticed so many pregnant woman until now!

Hi everyone,

I would like to propose a new sport for the 2012 Olympics "Being Moody" at which I would win the Gold, Silver and Bronze hands down. Will chat more later when am in a better frame of mind - must be hormones wish I knew which ones and why.

Clinic report:

Local NHS clinic, consultant got called away on an emergency but we saw Senior Registrar instead. Got asked all the kind of questions you'd expect - how long we'd been trying, had we been successful with other partners, had DH had anything like mumps/testicular problems/injuries and my history how heavy were periods, any problems with them, any gynae type problems. How often were we bd-ing and when.

(TMI Alert: We admitted that bd-ing was happening at least 4 times a week most of the way through my cycle. She said this was a huge help as too many people concentrated on bd-ing only at fertile times and that plus use of ov sticks was not the recommended way of trying to get pg. Particularly as it added to stress levels)

She then went and conferred with consultant and we are now going to have semen analysis, more day 2 and day 21 bloods, clamydia swabs and a hysterosalpingo contrast sonography for me. Sounds like a bad hand at scrabble but is just an ultrasound of my uterus etc.
We then go back in October for a chat about the findings and options.

Turns out my last oestrogen test (day 21) was at the top end of the normal range which is not as great as the GP suggested but not a showstopper. We said we really wanted to know if we were barking up the wrong tree when it came to the possibility of another child so that if that was the case we could just move on from trying and continue to be very thankful that we have DD.

Doctor said that we shouldn't write things off just yet but ours was a very positive attitude. She was really nice and didn't laugh us out of the room which was reassuring and what we had half expected.

DH isn't overly keen on the prospect of having to produce a sample but that's a couple of weeks off yet. *He claims to be out of practice and worried his hand might fall off

Sorry this is all me, me, me but hopefully it
is useful information. Wanted to let you all kknow how it went as we're off to France in a couple of hours so didn't want to leave you hanging.

Happy bd-ing while I'm away and take care of yourselves...

Hi Spiral, that sounds really promising. Good to have things moving along.
I've had an HSG and it was fine, if you don't mind carrying your clothes around in a shopping basket.
My DP was not at all keen to produce a sample, but of course he did manage, I just let him get on with it. The most yucky thing was me driving the sample to the hospital because they wanted it before 9AM. Eeew!
Just wanted to say 'Well Done'!!!!
Back soon... dins is calling

Hi everyone

Sprial - so glad your appointment went well. Your doctor sounds both empathetic and good - great combination. Hope the sun shines in France and you have a great break.

Summersky - hope you're feeling less blue today. But you may need to share some of those medals with me. Having a bit of a downer this morning and trying for No1 at 40 years old seems daft. Just feel I'm setting myself up for the next few years of miscarrying (sorry for the pity party). Anyone else trying for their first?

Need a slap with a wet fish today . Anyone got one handy?

Hi everyone,
So much better today possibly as well because DD has gone to Aunts for 3 days (longest we've been parted) Time to think and clean[hnm] and type.
FLS Sorry you are feeling down - sorry I don't have any wet fish but maybe the wet weather has a lot to do with it, someone find the tap and turn it off! Really good luck with the diet. On a strange positive note at least you have concieved once so it's working (sorry I know that's little comfort at the mo as I've been there too). I had my 1st pg at 40. Have you looked at www.foresight-preconception.org.uk/ at your age and with them on board they'll be telling you to paint the nursery.

Grownupbabes Glad you had a nice hols lovely to see the sun and relax - I concieved on last years hols, FruitGood Luck Glad the herbs are helping you feel so good. I'm sure it's working for me too. Thanks for asking Kiwi I do feel stronger than last year. Any signs yet? Fifitot any for you too or are you letting it go like the babystuff. I'm holding on to mine so the next one has to like pink or I'm in trouble. I'm not giving up until I hit the 7.

VSF Hope all is well with the Clomid.
Rowing I've heard great things about Reflexology, I loved having it done, apparently massages all the right TTC areas. I think our DH must be v similar as the joke was the same one he made to me when I told him he should go to the Docs, for my part I want him to show his commitment as I'm so into this now and when I'm reading one of my many fertility books he's ooggling 'What Car!'
Spiral
Thanks so much for that fantastic report it really helps to know in such thorough detail and it's sounding very hopeful for you both, can't wait to hear what happens after your hols. Hope you have les tres bonnes vacances.

I've just sent off for an ebay FSH test kit, just to see in the meantime that my menopause hasn't kicked in though I know with help it could be reversed if it has.
Hope I haven't missed anyone lets keep our chins and legs up!

Good news Spiral

Summer - let me know how you get on with your FSH test kit. I was thinking of getting one!

BTW felt I was coming down with swine flu today! Slept for 4 hours this afternoon but had awful stomach pains and the runs. So more likely to be a tummy upset. Tried to convince myself it was a pg sign!!!! Feeling drained and achy.

Hope you are feeling better Fifi and it's not that flu (though I kind of think if we are all going to get it best get it out of the way and build up immunity before Autumn/Winter when it will be at its worst). I find emotions very draining too and all of this TTC and baby stuff is the very essence of emotional.

I just wondered if anyone knew what the references to grapefruit juice were with TTC - it's been bugging me.

DH goes to the Docs tomorrow - I feel it's a little like being summond to the Headmasters room, fingers crossed he doesn't come back with any foot cream.
Night all.