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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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Original poster

Does IVF ever work first time?

21 replies

KC11 · 14/04/2009 14:53

I've just found out my first attempt at IVF has failed. I am 35 and desperate to conceive. Been trying since Feb 2005.

OP posts:

londonlottie · 14/04/2009 15:20

This reply has been deleted

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guineamango · 14/04/2009 22:17

Hi I know a couple of friends with ivf babies. It took each of them a different amount of time to conceive. One first time, another 3rd time and one after 9 attempts!! and then 1st time with 2ND baby.
I wish you lots of luck it really must be a huge roller coaster for you.

spongebrainmaternitypants · 15/04/2009 08:38

KC11, I'm so sorry to hear your IVF failed - it's devastating to invest so much in a cycle and then end up with nothing .

It took us 3 cycles to have our gorgeous DS - I do a few who managed it 1st time but they're in a minority tbh.

Do you have a review planned at your clinic where you can go through this cycle and see if you can do anything different next time?

We didn't change anything, we just got lucky. And luck is sadly often what it comes down to in the end.

Original poster

KC11 · 15/04/2009 17:00

Hi Sponge. What you say makes good sense. I am really cross that my hospital (as we're being NHS funded) has not bothered to call me despite emailing them yesterday and today. I cannot get through to them on the phone. in fact i've never been able to get through by phone. The line is permanently engaged and there is no answerphone!!!!!

I just assumed that we would be the lucky ones who had success first time around. The hospital did not warn us that the first time IVF is almost guaranteed to fail. I have fallen from a great height.

lottie I have just re-read the whole of the other thread assisted conception and all the bits in between. You have had a rought time of it too. I must remember that there are women out there who have partners who don't want to pursue the baby dream. My DH does want children. I keep thinking that I will reach the age of 50 and have no children. I feel angry and tearful today. I am trying to find myself a local reflexologist who i can see in the evenings and weekends. I really need something to calm me down. I should really get myself some counselling but the hospital counselling service is really busy and the only appointments they have available I cannot take as I can't get the time off work.

I know I have to pick myself up fom this. I just didn't know I'd feel so awful. I won't be having a baby before 2010 now at the earliest. That depresses me. And I think mr B.I.L.'s fiancee is pregnant.

OP posts:

mummydoc · 15/04/2009 17:19

KC11 - sorry to hear your ivf didn't work, do you have embryos stored you could use ? I was LUCKY and suceeded first time , actually had triplet pregnancy but lost one at 5 weeks nad second at 12 week sbut third embyo now bouncing 9 year old. try hard not to dwell on what might be the worse case scenario

AG13 · 15/04/2009 18:53

Hi KC11,

I am so sorry to learn that your first IVF did not work and it is even more frustrating that the clinic is not providing any feedback.

I am going into an IVF cycle soon and crossing my fingers. I thought IVF procedures have a rather high chance of success. My doctor advised I do not wait and go directly into IVF after only 1 IUI trial. What she actually told me is that IVF has about 50% success rate. I do not know if she is saying this based on general statistics she knows about for age 35 (my age) or it is the clinic she operates in which has this high rate of success. I will see her next week and inquire further. I know friends of mine who succeeded with the 1st trial of IVF but they have been told that they need to be very relaxed (not stressed out with the outcome). Now they have beautiful twin girls. I also know another couple who tried several times with no success but they are in their late 30s or maybe early 40s. So i guess, there is no rule.
I am trying not to have high expectations though I know how depressing it will be if it does not succeed.
I wish you the best in your next IVF, but maybe you have to change the clinic if you're not very satisfied with their service.

Be positive, it is not the end of the world. Keep looking at the bright side of your life and the chances of happiness you still have.

MarieMorgan · 16/04/2009 16:53

Hi KC11,
Really sorry to hear your IVF didn't work this time. I have two children through IVF, the first worked first time but the second took seven goes so I would agree with Sponge that luck plays a part. On the other hand, the people treating you will have learned a lot about how you respond to treatment and so can tailor your next cycle accordingly. I had my last child at 41 so you've got a few years yet. We changed clinics because we moved house while trying for our second. The negative of moving is that they have to get to know you all over again so you need to balance that against feeling you may get a better service. At the end of the day you want a baby so their success rates are probably much more important to you than whether they answer the phone. Have you checked the HFEA site. Also, if you haven't found it yet you can get loads of support on the fertilityfriends site. Hope you're feeling more positive soon and best of luck if you try again.

Original poster

KC11 · 24/04/2009 14:19

Hello marie thanks for your advice. I am overall happy with the clinic at Barts. I do agree that their success rates are much more important than whether they pick up the telephone. From being in their receiption waiting room I know the ladies in the department barely take a moment to sneeze or nip to the loo so I know they are run off their feet trying to look after all the fertility patients as best they can. Every person who has sat with us in the consulting rooms has made us feel comfortable, has not rushed us and has always answered our questions knowledgeably and clearly. It's not their fault I didn't conceive this time. It helps to get these tings off our chests.

Congrats on your two IVF babies. You've been in the place where I am now mentally. You've proved to me that there are successes and that you've been lucky to have two wonderful children. What ages are they? boys or girls? did your family know about the IVF whilst you were going through the cycles?
Kerry

OP posts:

scruffystevie · 01/05/2009 10:40

I'm about to start my first cycle and keeping my fingers and toes crossed! Not knowing yet what I'm letting myself in for I just have to believe it's going to work.

I have friends who've had twins after first time, others who it's not worked for three times, it's a hard one so I have to be prepared.

Sorry to hear yours didn't work, but don't give up! What men don't have to get into eh...?!

Stevie

Original poster

KC11 · 07/05/2009 14:35

Hey Stevie. When do you start taking your meds? We're friendly on Mumsnet and we share lots of information (sometimes too much information)

I am ever hopeful that some first-time-IVFers do succeed. There are statistics that support it!! you could easily be one of the lucky ones to get PG first time around. I hope you are. Any questions don't hesitate to ask me.

OP posts:

svy · 07/05/2009 21:48

I spent eight years TTC, had various tests etc for my infertility, no diagnosis. Had loads of other treatments. First attempt at IVF worked and gave me my lovely DS. I am so lucky.

IVF is a real rollercoaster, not something you can understand unless you've done it. I know loads of people that had successful attempts but the majority had to have several cycles. Its so hard but so worth it in the end. Don't give up.

ivfagain · 24/01/2011 11:05

KC11, so so sad for your news. Don't give up, it will work. Our first time round we had just 1 embryo and now I have a gorgeous 3 year old little boy. I've just started the process again. For us, IVF is the only route as the issues are on my Husbands side. (I've decided to track my progress on a blog - you're more than welcome to read if you like. tinyheartbeat.wordpress.com/2011/01/24/ivf-kick-off/)

Also, a friend of mine had 6 miscarriages before going to see a doctor in Galway who specializes in NaProTECHNOLOGY® - she's now pregnant with her second baby. Google it, it's worth a shot before putting yourself through IVF again.

smiles19 · 25/02/2012 19:10

im on my first cycle of ivf, been ttc for 3 n half yrs. i was so scared at the start of it even taking the synarel nasal spray ( started sniffing jan 23 2012 ) but u get used to it after a while. i had to take it for 3wks 2 sniffs morning 2 in evening before i had my blood test to confirm baseline, then i moved onto menopur injections every night, im on my 11 injection 2night and its my last of menopur wooohooo. i was sooo scared to inject at first took me 45 mins to do it, only takes me 5 mins now. had my scan on my ovaries yest everythings looking good for egg collection tues 28th feb ( my bday ) wot a present :) sooo scared tho. im feeling really down but excited, i just hope this cycle works first time :)

chipsandpeas · 25/02/2012 21:15

sorry to hear it didnt work
ivf did work for one of my friends first time - her issue was she had a damaged tube

Janet84 · 27/02/2012 15:31

Hi all, sorry to hear to about ur ivf failing, you must be devastated. I am currently on my first cycle with icsi treatment and having my egg collection tomorrow, very nervous about it all but trying to stay positive. Really don't help when you have people saying " don't get ur hopes up" Really hope it all works out for us :)

eurochick · 27/02/2012 15:40

BTW, this is a zombie thread. Which is fine if it was ressurected intentionally, of course. I'm just not sure if people have noticed.

Janet84 · 27/02/2012 19:13

Zombie thread???

AnEcumenicalMatter · 27/02/2012 19:17

Zombie thread = one that is long since dead but is resurrected a long time later.

This particular one was started nearly 3 years ago.

Pocket1 · 28/02/2012 08:07

Hi kc I'm so sorry that it didn't work out for you this time. It's all do incredibly stressful - ironically at a time when we need as little stress as poss. I also worry about being 50 with no kids and won't let myself imagine that!! Are you going to try again? Did you freeze any eggs/embies?

My first ivf (with donor egg) did work but then I mc at about 6-7 weeks. I'm hoping to go again in the next month or so when everything is back to normal.

Why dont it join me as some other lovely ladies on the 'assisted conception and all the bits inbetween' thread. You'll be in good company and there's always someone to hold your hand.

You never know, we might end up being cycle buddies!!

Pocket1 · 28/02/2012 08:08

Sorry about all the typos and hope you get my gist!!

babyconcern · 06/06/2016 10:48

Hi KC11,

Hope you are doing fine now. Have you tried with second cycle of your IVF or ICSI? Did you find success result. How is your stress level now. I am almost in the same position of you and i am very frustrated. I am very scared to go with these IVF/ICSI methods.
Post you experiences please.

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