Assisted conception and the bits inbetween Part Two!.......

[spook]

Hi everyone.
New thread starts here....

Issy I don't have much information to share, because I don't know what's normal for that scan. However, I did want you to know I'm thinking of you. Fingers crossed! Please keep us posted.

Hi to everyone else!

Hi dup, yes this is my first IVF. Enjoy eating all those things you're giving up tomorrow today . Good luck with going to bed early - I never manage it, I'm an extreme owl. Getting up at 6 for 7:30am scans is a killer - I usually get up around 9am. You can tell I'm ttc#1 . Try not to put pressure on yourself about your friend. One of my best friends is due in 3 weeks and I was always hoping to catch her up, but your children will still be friends even if there's a small age difference.

Lottie - Someone on FF told me that she was fine about 2-4 hours after the GA because you're under for such a short time and that's the same resting time my clinic recommends for the sedation.

Thanks for the good wishes Islegrin.

Well, got my blood test results back. My beta is only 7.
The nurse says it's not high enough to say I'm preg and it's not low enough to say I'm not. But it's all very low and doesn't look good. I've had 3 other pregnancies start low and then not develop right so it's feeling too familiar...
I have to have another blood test on Wednesday.
I'm just so sick of all this crap and I'm sick of everyone saying it's all going to work out...
By now I have this heavy feeling inside that it's just all useless. I can't do this anymore.
Sorry to be so depressing but I feel like I'm falling apart here

Hello everyone. Especially islegrin. Thanks for your kind words. I have deliberately not logged on to MN since last Wednesday as I needed "me time". I am feeling better than I was. Have to keep finding disctractions which really helps. So far I am:-

• waiting for a reflexologist to call or email me.
• organising DH's 40th birthday party in late June.
• planning on starting some type of exercise at a local sports centre (just need to pluck up the courage to walk in there for the first time).
• intending on sprucing up my garden and making it look tidier and more colourful.
• planning on weeding the flowerbeds more than once a year!!!!
• planning to keep on top of the laundry and housework.
• listen to my favourite CDs in the house rather than having the TV talking to itself.

All of the above helps take my mind off TTC. I am not going to count any days or take my temp or buy ovulation test sticks. I am going to enjoy my life and have wine when I want to. I am not going to stress about ovulation or luteal phases at all! Hurrah for me!!!!!!!!!!

I hope everyone is OK and not having too bad a time.

NPA - sorry to hear your news. I feel your pain.

Lottie - good luck with the egg collection. You only need one good egg. I was not given any choice and had to have GA. I was as sick as a dog for about 18 hours after. Maybe I was one of the few who reacts badly to the anaesthetic drugs. I was told 3 times that they had harvested 14 follicles. And the first thing i asked my DH when I woke up the fourth time was did they get any eggs? He thought it was quite funny. I am known for my love of sleep and lie-ins. Knocking me out is just asking for trouble.

Must go out and buy a healthy lunch now. Take Care all of you wonderful ladies.

Lottie I love love love your faux pas with the scanning monitor. That's the sort of thing I would easily do.

NPA - what do you think of acupuncture. I tried it but was not that impressed. Do you think I should give it another go? Do you think the person doing it makes a big difference? I did not feel that comfortable with the lady I saw. she kepy popping in and out of the room to answer a phone and talk loudly to the builders decorating her kitchen!!!

Lol Lottie - that's just the kind of thing I would do . Great news on your follies - sounding good.
HeidiS - So sorry about your news. Keeping my fingers crossed things improve for you.
KC11 - Good luck with all those aims you have.
Gilly - Well done on managing to avoid the breastfeeder.

Had my day 5 stim scan today and it's all very scary as similar to the results of someone on my FF thread who ended up with OHSS. Have 14 follies already, 6 between 1.1 & 1.6, 4 at 1.0 and 4 below. Womb lining is 5.8. They're concerned I'm overstimulating so want to see me again tomorrow, but haven't reduced my gonal-F dose yet. They also told me to make sure I take it easy, so just as well I've cancelled my dance lessons for 4 weeks.

Hope everyone is well.

Could I ask what FF is? Am I missing out?

Gosh, I took the weekend off and look at all the posts!

LL thanks for updating the list for me. Good luck with your EC on Wednesday! I will be thinking of you. I'm not at Guys, I'm at a private clinic in Kent as we live right on the Kent/London border, and so it's only a 10 minute drive from home. It was a recommendation from my GP, and so far I have generally been happy with them. They have asked me to repeat my FSH test, and also want to do an AMH test before the start of my next cycle so they'll know exactly what's what. It's interesting what you say about stress being bad for the whole process. I was massively stressed during my whole cycle, due to the unfamiliar process, worrying about the what ifs, worrying about how I'd manage at work etc. I ended up spending most of the weekend sleeping which felt like my body recovering after all of that was lifted, even if in an unwelcome way. Next time, I will try harder to take things more easily. And LL - with that in mind, do remember that managing your own rental property is terribly stressful! (been there, done that, it's fully managed now )

Issy I do hope that you're not developing OHSS - I was also told to drink minimum of 2L of water a day to guard against this, if it's any help. Best of luck for your next scan. And by the by, I didn't get on with the Gonal F pens at all, I much preferred the old-fashioned syringes for the Buserelin. Though I was injecting the Gonal F into my stomach, and the Buserelin into my leg, which may have made a difference.

KC11 I'm glad to hear that you've taken some me-time, and now have plenty of activities to keep you busy. I am planning on doing that later this week, as it's payday on Wednesday and so I shall be going shopping - I haven't bought any new clothes for ages on the off-chance I'd need a new wardrobe, and so there's a couple of new dresses out there with my name on them! Oh and I really enjoyed my acupuncture sessions - they were in a clinic near where I work, and I found them very relaxing. As I mentioned above I was very stressed, and the sessions became a real retreat - after the needles were inserted I normally dozed off for 20 minutes. The only problem was the cost - I was seeing a "fertility specialist" practitioner at Canary Wharf, so the sessions were fairly astronomical.

Heidi, I'm so sorry to hear you're having a tough time of it. There's nothing anyone can say to make it better I know, but be kind to yourself, and just take it one day at a time?

HI GILLY Hope you are bearing up OK. Family day at the gallery must have been tough for you. It's a constant kick in the teeth isn't it! What time frame are you looking at 'til you next attempt at IVF? How many attempts does your particular Primary Care Trust fund?

How are pinky and dharma? Feeling nauseas yet? I hope not. Keep us posted if you move onto other threads. We want to hear the success stories to keep us motivated.

By the by, I have a sneaky suspicion that my brother in law's fiance has a bun in the oven but she's not said anything yet. She said something very strange to her DP recently when she thought me and my DH were deep in conversation, but I heard every word she said and I'm convinced now. I know it sounds mean but I don't want her to beat to the finishing post. I know I am awful to be so childish and jealous but I've been trying to over 4 years and she must have only just started trying about 2 months ago. I will of course be nice and suuport her, particularly as her family all live overseas. It will be very difficult for me to see her bump growing and then when the babba arrives, but i can do it. For my brother in law (who is a really nice chap).

A little piece of me jumps for joy at the bits of good news and sinks at the bad bits.

Heidi - we're with you!!!

KC11 I'm so glad you took a couple of days to recharge. It sounds like it has done you some good. You've got the right mindset about BIL DP, if she's pg. You'll feel a lot of things, but you'll still be gracious and helpful.

LL - you made me giggle, and that's always a good thing. I'm so glad it was just a mistake rather than things being abnormal. We tend to worry about lots of things at this stage. (probably won't change once we are pg, will it???) Best of luck on Wednesday!

Issy hang in there, little setbacks come and go. Sounds like you can help counteract this with plenty of water - hopefully that's all it takes. You are well on your way, though - and progress is good!

Hi everyone,
sorry I haven't been on before, but felt a bit of a fraud when I was only taking the pill - didn't seem very exciting.
However, I am now freaking out because I am supposed to be injecting myself with merional today and I can't figure out what to do.
I only had a very cursory demo from the nurse in Hungary and I just can't see how it all goes together to be a syringe.
Somebody please help, I'm totally stuck!!

rowingboat I have no idea how to help you sorry, but can Google help you? Is there no leaflet with the syringe kit you've been given?

KC11 I know just how you feel. Two of my good friends and my SIL are currently pregnant, and two of them only started trying just before Christmas. I am very pleased for them, of course I am, but there's still a little voice in my mind wailing that it's not fair that they get to be having children before me, when we're 2.5 years down the track. Emotions are funny things....

NPA and Lottie, thank you!
It turns out I need a syringe, just assumed there would be one in the pack or something.
This is what happens when you are too frightened to look at your medication until the day you need it. [knees knocking sound]
So will just have to take it tomorrow morning as soon as I can get a syringe.
I got the needles from a needle exchange after losing the batch from the hospital (put them away somewhere 'safe')

KC11 I love your list of items you are doing in the meantime...

I started a thread of "things to do" on the tww - if anyone wants to take a look or add some ideas, having a bit of fun:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/741596-Things-to-do-during-your-TWW-grin

Rowingboat, did it all go alright in the end?

Lottie - at least they told you to take of your nail varnish! They didn't tell me when I had a laparoscopy last year, or the woman ahead of me in theatre, and the anaesthetist yelled at the nurses (in our earshot) to make sure they took it off. Not terribly professional! I am guessing that they need to be able to check your finger tips while you're under to check they they're not going blue? [notreally medical]

I think lots of projects for the 2WW is a good idea. That or watching dvd boxsets....

I had my cd10 scan today... one follicle on the left and one on the right. The only down side is that 24mm on left side is the tube that's blocked. Right side is 14mm. I wanted to cry, but came home and ate comfort food instead.

It took some wind out of my sails for sure. Walking in there I felt like I had two loaded six-shooters on my hips, ready for anything! Now I feel more like I have a can of bug spray on one hip and sunscreen on the other! UGGGHHH expectations are a KILLER!

IUI is scheduled for Friday, but I'm seriously considering if we should go through with it. Maybe we can just bd on our own and save a few bucks for next cycle, when hopefully the RIGHT side will have the lead follie. raspberries!!!

gilly Glad to hear you survived the family day ok, it must have been difficult for you. I'm really lucky that I already have my dd, but the downside is I'm forever going to toddler events and absolutely everyone with children her age (or much younger) is holding a baby or has a big bump.

lottie great news about your lining, after all the worries. I'm just as bad as you always trying to spot some information that I'm convinced the drs are hiding from me. I'm forever questioning my drs advice because of things I googled somewhere, I'm sure they'll soon be fed up with me...Best of luck for your EC!!!

heidi All the best for your scan tomorrow! I really hope you get some good news, I'm sorry that you are so down, but it's completely understandable.

KC11 Glad to hear you're feeling better! I think it's great that you've found so many things to keep you busy, I'm convinced that's the best thing you can do for yourself. I think you should give acupuncture another go, but with someone else. I go and see this really calm practitioner and find it very relaxing. not sure if it really improves your chances, hasn't helped me so far and I have been going there for over half a year, but it does calm me down and I get someone impartial to talk to. I know what you mean about being jealous, it's hard to see other people conceive so easily, even when they're friends. The number of people I know who had babies less than a year after their wedding - some of them significantly older than me. Unfortunately life isn't fair, but it's great that you have the strength to deal with it.

How did your scan go issie, hope the water did the trick and you don't have OHSS.

Hi islegrin, sorry about the scan, is there a possibility that the smaller follicle will catch up to some extent? I once had one small follicle and one large, and two days later they were both the same size, strangely enough. the hcg trigger would then release both of them wouldn't it? What did your dr say, did they give you any advice??

I had my dummy et and hycosy today. it was uncomfortable but ok, the worst thing for me was the spotlights pointing at my bits and someone rummaging around without me seeing what was going on. oh well, better get used to this I guess. I also got my buserelin and progesterone, so everything will kick off soon. will start dr one day early on 30 april.