Where Emmsy's established friendships continue to support us on our journeys.....

[SparklyPseudonym]

Here we go again . Let the good news flow....

Afternoon all

Well. I finally got my results! Can you believe it?!? Although I only got them having adopted my 'keep-phoning-until-you-get-to-speak-to-someone-who-actually-sounds-like-they-know-what-they're-talk ing-about strategy' Which finally paid off this afternoon. The 2nd smear showed very borderline changes, she made it sound like they were hardly there at all, and the biopsy showed some inflamation but nothing nasty. Apparently they're in the pile for the consultant to go through, but he hasn't actually looked at them yet ! And then he'll have to do his dictation which apparently takes quite a while so goodness only knows when I'll get a letter through! I asked if it might be another week, but she didn't seem very optimistic! It's just crazy, really makes you understand why people go private. But the lady I spoke to was very nice. I explained our situation and how hard it's been and she said she'd wave the results under the consultant's nose and ask him to do the letter, or failing that she'd phone me if he says anything other than that they're fine. I have to go back for a repeat test in 6 months if I'm not pg. Pray god I will be by then!!

This is day 3 off the booze, quite worried how much I missed having a glass (or 2 ) of wine last night while I was cooking dinner... Have decided to try to stay off it til christmas, although I'll probably have a couple of glasses over the weekend, we have to got to the in-laws 40th wedding party all day on saturday, I'll need all the help I can get to get through that! Mind you, I also bought a new skirt to help ease the pain. Very naughty as am totally skint, but it had 25% off and I needed cheering up - here What do you think? Haven't decided what to wear with it yet, safest bet would be a fitted black polo neck with 3/4 length sleeves. Am contemplating fish nets, but we'll see

Mibbes so glad you got the red bag - def the right decision!

hi kate im glad you have had your results and there is nothing sinister going on well done on giving up the booze hopefully the results are a sign that TTC is almost ready to start
xx ei xx

my best friend has just announced her surprise preg to me on msn she has 2 kids already by 2 different dads and now she will have a 3rd by another fella again!! its not fair!! she had the implant in and only got it taken out about 3 weeks ago and she is already preg!! i cant believe it i feel like a total bitch but i was hoping it wou;d take her ages so i would get caught before her am i the most horrible bitch ever or what
xx ei xx

Ei Hey sweetie. You are NOT an evil bitch. It's very hard to be happy for someone when what they have it what you want so desperately. We've all been taught that we have to show this compassionate, happy face to the world because it's 'bad' to show your true feelings. It's fine to smile and be happy for her. But its also fine and completely normal to feel incredibly pissed off. Especially given what you've been thru.

Kate really really glad that the test results have come thru and that they (hopefully) look normal. You're in the home straight now love. Good luck with giving up the booze. But also, don't beat yourself up if you have the odd glass or two. Am sure that the stress of not drinking won't do you any favours. How about some of those fab 'bright' tights to give the outfit some colour? And a killer pair of heels? Love that look.

Waves to everyone else. Hope you're keeping warm. Bbbrrrrrrr.

Oh, and we've got basement walls now. Wooohoooo. Concrete poured today!

Evening ladies! Still here Bouncing on my gym ball and hoping baby comes soon!
Mibbes How are you doing?
Ei Your reaction is totally understandable under the circumstances. Life just isn't fair sometimes (((Hugs))) to you.
Kate I'm so pleased the results showed nothing sinister. Roll on ttc Good luck with giving up the booze, it's all in a good cause. Love the skirt btw - I do like Coast's clothes and can't wait to get back into mine. Their trousers always fit so perfectly they're definitely worth the money. I wandered in one of their shops the other day just to have a look at what was in this season...
Georgie Glad you're feeling a bit more positive and had a nice time with DH. It's good to take time out sometimes and suspend everyday life.
Scully Really hope 2009 is your year.
No news from Fruity, Teehee or Mollie? Hope you're all OK ladies.

Ei you're not a bitch at all, I think there are a lot of us here dreading friends' "announcments". It's a really really tough thing to cope with, especially when it seems to always be so easy for some people We're all for you if/when you need to rant, no apologies necessary!

Ghouly basement walls sound like a huge step in the right direction You'll be picking out paint colours before you know it! Sadly I haven't got the legs for colourful tights - they really don't need the publicity! But I def like the way you're thinking!

Cricri glad things are ok with you. Are you getting impatient yet or still nice and relaxed?

Well, we had dinner at SIL's tonight to finalise arrangements for the ILS bash on saturday... and my not drinking didn't go so well! Although I only had one glass of red, and I figure maybe it doesn't count as it was at someone else's house? And anyway, I needed one when I saw the table plan. Not only do I know practically no-one who's going, but DH's charming parents have put us on different tables ()

So I figure Georgie's quite right, a glass or 2 is practically medicinal isn't it?!?!

Night lovely ladies, sweet dreams

Hey girls, I was just in the middle of typing a big post and my laptop shut down and restarted so I don't feel like it now, but just wanted to say I am here. Had internet issues at the weekend and this week is the anniversary of my mmc which I think has affected me. I feel a bit funny posting when I am having a wobble as at least I am pg and so many of you are banging your heads against a wall but I figured I'd fess up and be honest.

Anyway I have been lurking and promise to be back later to catch up with you all properly.

Kate Am sure that a few glasses of wine to take the edge off are better than skining up a fat joint to chill you out at your in-laws bash! Although, might be tempted to do that. Just to see their faces .

TeeHee Hello dear heart. Very nice to hear from you. No apologies for feeling sad with your approaching anniversary. We all know how awful these dates are. And just because you're pg, it doesn't take away the feelings of sorrow that are left from such a traumatic experience.

Taking the DD's to see Disney on Ice tonight at the O2 Arena. Wish me luck. Libby has turned into complete devil child . Little hell bat at the moment. Taking all my parenting (super)powers to control the little sod!

halloween tonorrow! Yipppeeeee. LOVE Halloween.

Hope everyone else ok. Love to all.

really sorry for not posting in here in so long . have been pure flat out with wedding plans at the moment, only five weeks to go

Fruity thank you so much for the info, it has helped my friend , she is now waiting to see a specialist. best of luck for your 4d scan! i'd say you cant wait!

Emmsy HUGE CONGRATS to you lovely lady! and a big welcome to lovely miss amy too!

georgie sorry your having trouble with the building work, i will have it all ahead of me in a couple of years.

Kate glad you got some good news from your docs re results. I also had "borderlinee" changes to my cervix a couple of years ago 3 years i think, they did laser surgery for me, and removed the dodgy cells, i had to have repeat smears every 6 months for 2 years and now only have to have them every year. (though to be honest i still opt to have them every 6 months)

Ei your not a bitch at all! its so horrible when someone announces like that how they just fell pregnant so quick when we all have been trying for so long We will get there though xxx

Cricri it must be getting near for you now! i'd say you cant wait

Teehee Big waves, how are you feeling.

Sparkly hope you are well hun xxx

Scully & Mollie Big Waves!!!!!!

As for me, we have stopped charting and ttc now until afer the wedding, i dont want to be boob prodding on my wedding day

Very quiet in here today. Am back to catch up properly

Kate I really don't think a couple of glasses of wine are going to hurt, try and be a bit kinder to yourself. Also what does your consultant say about TTC. From what you say they haven't found any medical reason that you can't carry to term and the test results are all good so if you feel ready....? The things that concern your acupuncturist - are they just going to mean it will be harder to get pg or harder to stay pg? On the other hand if you don't feel ready emotionally then there isn't any hurry. Just my opinion but thought I would give it anyway. Hope Lola and Nemo are settling into there new situation. Can't believe that you and DP are being split - I mean why? Just to be awkward?

Ei I got so tired of feeling a bitch when I found it increasingly hard to smile and say congratulations when yet another pg was announced. Please don't feel bad, it's how you feel and you are entitled to feel that way, it is so understandable. It is just unfair how easy it seems to be for most people and they just don't 'get' us and those like us. Hope you are coming to terms with the news a bit more and that the mammouth BD'ing is helping! Fingers crossed.

Georgie Hey lovely, you have had a rubbish couple of weeks haven't you? Things seems to be looking up a bit, no? I mean to say - walls and disney on ice - what more could a girl ask for.

Cricri Are you getting fed up with waiting yet? Keep letting us know how you are as when you are away for 24 hours it seems we all think the same thing, that she has arrived!

Scully You can so be bothered - fishing, camping, huge BBQ's. Mind you I guess you have the weather for it. Camping here at the moment would be a bit nippy.

Fruity You are only a couple of weeks ahead of me but it always seems like you are miles ahead - v/exciting that your scans are just round the corner. How are you feeling?

Sparkly & Mollie Where are you? Are you OK?

I am on holiday this week and am trying to decorate our downstairs bathroom but it is slow progress as also trying to take it easy. Having a real wobble this week - keep fearing that something wrong, I think maybe just cos one year on is on my mind. No logical reason to be scared - still feeling a bit sick and tired and having indigestion and no bleeding so need to try and stay positive - trying to listen to the logic! Finally bought some maternity clothes - jeans and 3 tops and a non-maternity caridgan that just does up at the neck so I can expand out the front.

Going to see my nieces tomorrow and am going to tell them. My brother says they will be excited and they are the only people who won't looked concerned and temper their reaction because of our history so am quite looking forward to it.

Anyway good to be back. DP virtually ordered me on to MN as he knows it will make me feel better!

TeeHee Hope you feel better after your MN fix - good to see you Sorry to hear it's been a difficult week for you though, these anniversaries are never easy. How many weeks are you now? When is your next scan? You should start to feel flutterings very soon and that will help to reassure you - it certainly did for me.
Georgie Hope you enjoyed Disney on ice and sorry Libby is being such a nightmare.
Piper Good to see you! Best of luck with the final wedding preparations, bet you can't wait Hopefully you'll come back from your honeymoon with a BFP
Kate I agree with Georgie, a glass or two of wine won't hurt. Can't believe the table plan - it's going to be a fun day isn't it
No news here yet - DH and I are going to go and see the new Bond movie on Saturday (EDD) if nothing has happened! I'm fairly relaxed as baby will come when she's ready. However, I am also getting impatient to meet her now!
Will let you know as soon as anything happens - with hb I should be able to post once things start for real
Hope everybody else is OK.

Right it looks like some of you lovelies need a good telling off!!!!!!

Kate You are not useless If you are then most of on here are as well, and you would never call us useless so you can't use it to describe yourself then either! Like the others have said, don't be too hard on yourself if you slip a little with the "no alcohol" and I love the rolling a fat joint idea at the in-laws party, how dare they sit you seperately, evil people! So pleased you have got all your results back, at least you can rule those out of your waiting to TTC issues, and just concentrate on the accupuncture part and once that's sorted there will be no stopping you
Georgie Sorry to hear things were a bit crappy at home, glad to hear you have cleared the air with DH, how come around anniversary's even more pg people crawl out the woodwork?? Hurray for the basement walls, let's hope it continues smoothly for you hun
EI You are not evil or horrible or a bitch, I had all these feelings when we found out about SIL last week, still have a few issues about it, but it's totally understandable, I talked to my counsellor about it and she said she'd be worried if I didn't feel that way. I even told her that at one point last week I actually hated SIL with a passion!! It feels like a knife twisting away at each announcement, but we are strong women who are surrounded by love and support here and in RL and we WILL get through it and we WILL have babies (hopefully in 2009) like Scully said! Hope you are feeling a little better hun x
Piper Hello stranger Not long til the big day now, I hope you will post pictures for us to nosey at, you know how we love to nose!
TeeHee Glad you fessed up, why should you feel different just coz you are pg? An anniversary is an anniversary, a wobble is a wobble, these fears unfortunately are only natural considering your history, just make sure you come and vent on here regularly. Sending you hugs and hoping things will get a little easier for you soon x
Fruity Can't wait to see the results from your 4D scan, how exciting for you and don't feel you can't share with us on here
Scully Will look forward to photos's on FB, hope you have a lovely weekend away
Sparkly Stop wearing yourself out with work and come and spend some time with us soon x
Waves to Mibbes CriCri Emmsy
I plucked up the courage to go and see newly pg SIL last night, it was a bit awkward, what is that saying . . . . like there was an elephant in the roo m?? Think that's what it is, anyway neither of us mentioned it which was odd, I think if it's like that next time I see her I will just get it all out in the open. Sorry I haven't been on all week, work is extremely busy, doing another new job but finding it much easier to cope than last week! Strangely I am looking forward to not TTCing for a couple of months, but give me another week or so and I'll probably be champing at the bit!

Here here! Mollie

Just popping my head in to say hi

Piper Lovely to see you! I think if you can manage it (I know how impossible it is), a more relaxed approach to ttc sounds like a fantastic idea. You'll be so caught up in the wedding you probably find yourself pregnant and not find out till you're about 8 weeks gone - here's hoping anyway!

Keep us updated with the plans. I'll need some ideas too! I've put our wedding on the back burner for now. At least we've got the venue booked.
It's a bit difficult at the moment because my Mum and Dad aren't talking and I don't see much of my Dad (he's paying for the wedding ) so trying to organise it at the moment is virtually impossible just now anyway.
I find it really awkward to talk to my Dad about the wedding as everything is so expensive and I hate asking for things. My Mum is usually the go-between.

I've discovered Tesco Finest Prawn Cocktail and I've stuffed it between two slices of bread. delicious!

My MIL is helping me to look after my neighbour's 7 year old son. We've had him today and yesterday. He's really stressful. He's got ADHD and Aspergers (sp?) and he just constantly answers back and is obsessed with guns, killing and poo. My DS thinks he's hysterical which makes controlling him really difficult. Ive really noticed DS's personality changing overnight. He copies everything this boy does. Not sure I'm cut out for looking after him actually. I won't be doing it again, especially not on my own.

I feel bad because he can't actually help it, but there's just no reasoning with him and I haven't the patience.

I've been showing off my new Phil and Teds all week I don't know why I've never had one before, it's fab!

Aaah girls - thanks I feel better already. DP was right should have leant on you ladies days ago! Mollie you sound upbeat which is great. Glad you are starting to look forward to TTC. Positive thinking lady - 4th time lucky for both of us hey!!

Fruity ADHD & Aspergers - no wonder he has a bad effect of DS. Hope you are enjoying the Halloween madness.

Cricri We will allow your DH to give live updates as it is a HB - it will be like Autumnwatch but kind of not!! . I am 17 weeks tomorrow and seeing the midwife on Wednesday so hope she will listen for heartbeat and put my crazy mind at rest.

Piper Nice to see you haven't forgotten us. Exciting, wedding only 8 weeks - enjoy the break for TTC. Don't be a stranger.

Big waves to everyone else...

Happy Halloween - Mwwwwaa Mwwwaaa Mwwaaa (thats a scary laugh by the way!! )

Fruity Sorry to hear that things are a bit awkward with the wedding plans, but don't forget resident wedding planner Mollie will gladly research/sort things for you Not surprised you're having problems with DS being influenced by your neighbours son, sounds like he could be rather a handful Glad to see you're still enjoying your food, have missed updates on your diet
TeeHee So pleased you are feeling better lovely, I hope to follow your example next year with 4th time lucky
Well AF is still here, I know I moaned that I wanted her to come but there's nothing like outstaying your welcome, CD6 today I know I'm not going to TTC til after consultants in December but I wish she'd bugger off!
Hope you all have a wonderful weekend planned, x

Fruity What date are you getting married? i think you told me before but brain is frazzled at the mo The planning end here is finshed now thank god, just rushing and racing around making sure everything is paid up and nothing has been forgotten The printer was 2 weeks late with the main invites and now we are waiting for the evening invites which look like they are going to be late too Cant really ring him up and complain though cause my dad is sorting them and i also find it hard to talk to my dad about wedding plans so dont want to put him off taking interest DH2B just had his stag party last weekend and got v drunk and decided to ask his other brother to be a groomsman aswell (he already had one brother and two friends doing the job) which means we now have 4 groomsmen and only 3 bridesmaids, i have spent all day trying to find another bridesmaid dress [ahhhhh!!] I cant wait to see some lovely pics of mini fruity from your 4d scan!

Mollie dont worry, there shall be loads of pics! Are you taking a break from TTC too? i am finding it very strange but pleasant not to be reaching for my themometer every morning.

Well this post has turned into a big wedding rant Big hello to Sparkly Mibbes Cricri Teehee Kate Georgie Ei Scully and Emmsy there, think i have got everyone

Morning

mollie at AF outstaying her welcome.

piper Not till next September. So ages to go yet. Something tells me it will fly by though The trouble is, it's too much time to have a change of mind

Got two parties today. One's a 4 yr old's birthday/halloween. I have no idea what the other is for It's at one of my mindee's houses. It can't be mindee's birthday as it's not until the end of the month. I'm gonna have to text to ask. How embarrassing I'm sure she's told me.

can you tell who it is yet??

Morning ladies
No news here yet before you start getting excited EDD was yesterday so I'm being kept waiting Oh well, she'll come when she's ready! Mw is coming this afternoon for a check-up and possibly a sweep, although I haven't decided about the latter yet.
Fruity Hope your two parties went well and that you found out what the occasion was for the second one!
Ei Love the name change
Piper Hope you get all the wedding invites sorted out. There's always lots of rushing around in the last few weeks leading up to a wedding but everything will come together don't worry. Look forward to seeing your photos!
Mollie Hope AF has packed her bags and left for this month.
Hello to everyone else and hope you all have good Sundays

Morning,

cricri I'm sure you know that 1st babies are notoriously late In fact I've even put my own due date this time round back by two weeks to avoid disappointment as DS was nearly 2 weeks late.
You'll, no doubt, get those terribly annoying texts/phone calls asking "any sign yet?" I would politely tell them once that you will let them know. Then ignore any further pestering. I had this for two weeks by one person in particular and believe me, after all that time I could have developed a violent streak
I do hope you don't have to wait too long

That party was a Halloween party I sort of thought it might be but being after the actual day I thought it might be something else.
Took me ages to get there too. Tomtom said 37 mins. Took me 1hr 15 Bloody London traffic.

Ei Love the new name. You're so inventive with your names. I'm always impressed

I was lying in bed this morning looking at my belly and I actually saw it move! It sent waves of fat like a Mexican wave across my tummy I'm finally half way there now. Scan a week on Thursday. I can't believe how amazingly fast it's going. DS seemed to take forever!

I managed to give myself whiplash yesterday while straightening my hair. I flicked my head back awkwardly and it's been really sore ever since I can barely move my head. I was hoping it might be better this morning but it's not. Now gotta go and pick DP up from Kingston. Driving isn't easy when I've gotta move my whole body to look for cars

Ah well, I'd better jump in the shower now or he'll be waiting all day - wish he'd just jump on a bus ffs

Fruity LMAO at your whiplash incident, hope it's not too painful, sorry to laugh but it sounded so funny
EI Love the new name x

Feeling rather delicate after my drunken debauchery yesterday! Went into town with DH to do some shopping but ended up in the pub instead, got home very drunk at 6pm, so early to be legless! Just about managed to watch X factor then passed out! Oops! Oh well, may as well do it while I can

cricri was thinking of you today, I knew you were due around now as we both had our FDLP on the same day Amy will be a month old on Friday and the 0-3 months clothes are still huge on her! It wont be long now m'lady before you have your precious baby in your arms. Try and stay calm when labour starts, remember that giving birth is a natural experience, our bodies are made to give birth, focus on your breathing and the end result, try not to be scared, I know you will do just fine, you sound like a very strong lady & that will definately help you, I can't wait to hear your good news, lots of love and strength to you my lovely friend xxx

sparkly Amy loves her Blankee, thank you! I'm sorry you have been feeling a little low lately, it's not surprising really. I really hope you can find some time to chill out and get your mind and body back on an even keel, I knew you were taking on too much emotional stress, not just in your real life world but on here! (I haven't helped)I wish you all the happiness you so much deserve, lots of love to you XX

Hello to all you other ladies, as soon as Amy starts to sleep through the night(if she does!) I will be back in full force to try and offer any support that I possibly can, stay strong for each other, you are all lovely,lovely ladies xxx

Stop the world, I want to get off . Bloody shattered. Another weekend spent running around like a blue arsed fly. Have just decided that there won't be any 'me' time for the forseeable future as too much to do. Bit like drowing really. Once you accept the inevitable, it's actually rather liberating .

Hello Fruity. How's the whiplash . Am laughing with you my love. Not at you! Have cricked my neck many a time when brushing my hair so can sympathise with how damn painful it can be. Really sorry to hear that the wedding has been postponed. Can't be nice playing piggy in the middle with your parents. Hope things smooth themselves out soon.

CriCri. C'mon. The suspense is killing me. Get a move on.. Only joshing. Hope the wait is nearly over for you.

Ei LOVE the new name. Does this reflect a more positive Ei?! Or have you done like me and just said, 'feck it' to the world and let yourself go your own merry little way?

Mollie Has AF buggered off yet?

Kate How's Lola settling in? Are you getting any sleep?

Sparkly Where are you? All ok?

Emmsy Lovely to hear from you. Can't beleive how old Miss Amy is already. God, time flies when you're having fun !

Piper Hello! Can't wait for the wedding pics. Are you getting excited? Lovely to hear from you. Although it does all sound rather stressful. Will be worth it on the day though.

Hello Scully and Mibbes. What's occurin in your world?

TeeHee. Sorry lovely lady. Didn't mean to leave you out. Did you finish the decorating? And how did it go when you told your neices?

Emmsy what a lovely post to Sparkly & Cricri Fantastic to hear from you Have you posted your birth story yet? Sorry if I've missed it. Really glad to hear you're doing ok, I hope you're taking your own advice re not taking on too much stress

Ei Love the new name! Is there any particluar reason for you being so happy...?

Cricri what did you decide to do about the sweep in the end? Am very , but can't wait to hear your wonderful news, and see the first pics of your gorgeous girl

Teehee Thank you so much for your message. I think my acupuncturist is worried that it would be harder for me to get pg if I started trying now, but also that I'd be more likely to mc, and after what we've been through I'm too scared to go for it when someone is telling me not to... But I'm seeing the lady who runs the naturopathic centre this aft, she is effectivly the acupuncturist's boss, so it'll be interesting to see what she says... If she reckons I'm ready it could be go go go as soon as next week !! Hope so, though of course I'm quite scared... I can't believe you're 17 weeks though!!! FANTASTIC!!! Let us know how it goes on Wednesday, I'll be thinking of you You're nearly half way there!!

Lovely to hear from you Piper, glad to hear the wedding plans are going well, you've picked a fantastic time of year to get married (It's our wedding anniversary on 26th of this month) In many ways 3 years have flown by, although I'm glad I didn't know in advance how tough this last year was going to be... As I've just said to someone on another thread, I hope there are happier times ahead for all of us - and a wedding is a fantastic way to start

The ILs 'do' on saturday wasn't too bad. The hardest bit was during the speeches when I could see DH playing with his cousin's little boy who was born in January, while FIL was going on about how marvellous it was to have all the grandchildren there and how there will hopefully be "at least one new member of the family by christmas" Don't know how he got to "at least one" - one of DH's other cousins is pg, the baby's due next month, but surely that's just one not "at least one" So I was quite tearful around then, but otherwise ok. The best thing was that I met another of DH's cousins for the 1st time (he has hundreds of them - bear in mind this was a do for family only and there were nearly 70 people there....) She has 4 children but has also had 2 mc's, the first at 37 weeks and then another mmc at 14 weeks. The first had downs (they didn't know in advance) and the 2nd had Edward's syndrome. She's now given up her very high powered corporate job to work training midwives to deal with mc. She was lovely, and told me to call her/email her when I fall pg again, and offered to support me through it any way she can, which was very kind of her Nice to know she's there to add to my support network (that means you lot! )

I'll let you know how it goes this afternoon, wish me luck

Hello to everyone else, sorry for the long rambling post