Been trying for 10 months...no luck....can you advise please?

[Nelli29]

Hi everyone, we have been ttc for nearly 10 months with no luck. My cycle is a standard 28 days with my fertile days falling on the 14th day (text book) but we have had no luck and my dh suggested perhaps its time we went to see our GP. My dh has a child from previous marriage, so I'm feeling if there is anything to be found it going to be with me. Any thoughts?

Hi Nelli ..welcome

Questions that immeditely pop into my head are

How do you know you're ovulating on the 'textbook' 14th day .. are you using OPKs or charting?

How old are you?

Are you BD every other day around your fertile days (best for sperm production

Then some comments

Don't worry too much, the average length of time to conceive first child is 18 month and that accounts for people who conceive within a month and those who take up to 3 years

You could go to the docs to get initial investigations done (DH will need a sperm count too even if he does have another child things can change) .. if you decide to go for tests, tell the GP you've been trying for over a year

If there is 'a problem', which is unlikely, it is probably best if it is with you as there will then be more treatment options available, many of which are non-invasive.

Good luck Nelli .. wander over to the latest TTC thread .. they're always very supportive there

HTH

Nelli29 - poor you, it's horrible isn't it? How old are you and your dh? If you're 29, like your nickname suggests, you may be in luck, depending on your gp. Many gps will refer couples who are around 30 or over if they've been ttc for a year; some say leave it for 18m. Hopefully if your gp decides to run some tests you and dh can have the inital blood and sperm tests to rule out anything obvious, without having to refer you. You'll just have to see what your gp says. there's no harm in going along. but do try to not get too wound up about it, as stress can hinder things. the good news is that a huge proportion of couples who have been tcc for a while get pg within 18m. good luck x

twiglett I have been using the clearblue ovulation kit and I have just turned 30 which is depressive in itself!!

Sorry might seem a bit dim but don't know what bd means?! If its what I think then yes

Thank you for your replies, I think I might just go for the initial blood test just to put my mind at rest. Glad I'm not on my own!! x

being 30 isn't depressing, its fabulous .. I had a lovely early 30s

30 is a good age though so no worries there

bd means 'baby dance' .. sex to conceive

I would really try to relax (worst advice ever given to anyone trying to conceive) but if you want to start the tests going remember to exaggerate how long you've been trying

Hi there!
It took nearly 4 years for me to get knocked up - we put off going for tests as long as we could to avoid medicalising the whole thing but eventually did get them done (all normal) and we were about to start IVF when I conceived naturally so in retrospect I am glad we didn't do anything faster. However that is with the benefit of hindsight and it was horribly stressful as all our friends seemed to be suddenly getting pregnant at the drop of a hat. I used to time holidays for mid cycle and we did conceive on holiday. The other thing that may have helped was reflexology - it's supposed to have a pretty good success rate & I got pregnant within a couple of weeks of finishing the course - cheaper than IVF anyway. GOOD LUCK!

Go to the GP, it's well worth a check. But don't worry much about it, sometimes a single box of tablets can make the trick.

it took me ages to get preg with my daughter.

Stupid as it sounds I only did the bum up on a pillow thing for one month and fell pregnant with her. Plus sex at least 3 times a day when on a 'fertile' day

used the OK kit too.

your age has nothing to do with it. i was 19 when I started trying didnt fall preg until I was 21

and I think stressing about it doesnt help. 10 months is not a long time. People may tell you they get pregnant first time but LOTS of people takes ages and ages but just dont broadcast the fact to everyone they know and meet

Hi there, a few people have recommended the persona kit - costs 60 pounds and then 10 pounds a month - I have used it for my second month now and it tells you the day you ovulate. A number of people claim to have gotten pregnant straight away using it as it is so precise.... the digital ovulation kits are also worth trying. I have discovered that I ovulate on day 8 and not later as I had thought... Good luck!!

Nelli29, I wouldn't normally talk about the positions we bd in but for the sake of trying to help someone else get pregnant, I will because I swear it worked for me. If you haven't already tried this, go for a rear-entry position, what I mean is lie on your side with your husband behind you - and do your bum on the pillow thing afterwards. We accidentally did this on about the 8th month of ttc - and it worked! I did it again when trying to conceive dc2 - and we got him in just 2 months! - and agin with dc3 - and we got her in just 2 months too! Apparently if your cervix tilts backwards this is the best position for pregnancy. And how do you know if your cervix tilts backwards? You don't!! At least I didn't, until my midwife examined me in labour (because we were told in ante-natal that she would have to move it forwards for some reason...)

I hope that is of some help. I was 33 when we first ttc - I had on OPK and thought I was doing all the right things... but I'm convinced it was this postion that made the difference in the end. Best of luck!