Hi Terrier and Katie - been busy in rl the last few days, going ob trips out and things to lessen the stress of TTC!
Katie I really feel for you, I went through the same crisis of confidence in having a reversal but always got advised it was best to try for a reversal first - even the GP and family planning said the same I found the follwing (cut and paste) sums up the advice I got from most people!:
The pros and cons of vasectomy reversal and IVF are the following: If a vasectomy reversal is successful then it can lead to natural conception which for most couples is most desirable, cost effective and fun! It requires only one procedure be done and then most people are on their way. Reversal is about one half the price of a single cycle of IVF when all expenses are added up. A study published several years ago showed that total costs were three times as expensive to deliver a child conceived with IVF versus a vasectomy reversal. The cons of reversal are that it doesn?t always work, some men don?t want to have a reversal and that it may take a fair amount of time to conceive after a reversal. The mean time to pregnancy is about 12 months following a reversal but this is distributed on a bell shaped curve (Gaussian) so some people will get pregnant sooner and others later then 12 months.
The Pros of IVF are that it offers the quickest way to get pregnant in a given month but it doesn?t always work, as a matter of fact most couples will have to go through more than one IVF cycle to deliver a baby. Remember that pregnancy rates don?t mean a live baby. IVF is an excellent alternative if a vasectomy reversal has failed or if there is female factor infertility as well as male factor problems.
The cons of IVF are several fold. IVF is expensive, much more expensive for the same statistical result as reversal. Many women do not react well to taking two weeks of fertility injections and the medications can have side effects ranging from very mild to very severe. Many couples are hesitant about having a test-tube baby unless it is the only alternative. The whole process also requires that a man undergo a procedure to get sperm for IVF although is it not as detailed as a reversal procedure. Lastly, there is close to a 30% chance of having multiple births with IVF that can compromise the health of the babies and complicate the pregnancy in certain circumstances
Myth #6: If you only want one more child then In-vitro is a better option than vasectomy reversal and than having a vasectomy again.
Fact: Since there is a 30% chance of having twins or triplets with IVF, vasectomy reversal is usually a better option for couples wanting only one more child. Couples are often told to have IVF rather than a reversal and another vasectomy. This is usually very appealing to the husband but not so for the wife who has to go through the injections and egg harvesting procedure. The truth is that it is still way less expensive to have a reversal and a second vasectomy if needed down the road than IVF. Now with the no-scalpel vasectomy, vasectomy is a quick and relatively painless 10 -minute office procedure. Remember that it will take time to conceive and carry the pregnancy to term so most men won?t need another vasectomy by the time it is all over.
But having read all that I think you have to make the decision for your individual circumstances. I would research IVF, the costs, the physical process etc and decide based on that - its very very hard to know what to do for the best.
Good luck with it, we'll be thinking of you xx