TTC for 18+ months and feeling low!

[Natty2]

I'm fairly new at this forum and decided to join after TTC since the start of 2022
We discovered earlier this year that my DH morphology was low, although all other results were normal. He implemented life style changes straight away, and even went through a varicocele embolisation a few months ago, so we're waiting to see if that's helped.

Having gone through the rest of the year undergoing tests everything seems normal, so the NHS are not letting us even get on the IVF list until 2024. It's been such a long, physical and emotional journey and there seems to be no end in sight.

Anyone else going through similar things? I feel like I live life in 2 week cycles and it's so hard to try and not think about it all!!
Any tips?!

Not a lot of help here but I was ttc for 3 years before I actually fell pregnant. The gp was lovely but not much help was given and I was told that it will happen sooner or later.

I then decided to stop trying when I had the first covid vaccine as I was encouraged to wait 2 months before trying again. Just as I wanted to start again I got the second vaccine and told to hold off again. I went 4 months of not trying and actually felt I relaxed massively. The pressure felt off for both dh and I and it almost felt like we could be ourselves again without the horrible 2 week wait. When it came to try again we decided against it and to start again 6 months later. We were just feeling happy. 2 months later and I was pregnant. I know it’s just a thing that happened, we weren’t taking any vitamins, we weren’t pushing ourselves and we definitely weren’t ttc. I genuinely put it down to both of us feeling relaxed.

I really hope for the best for you. It’s a horrible time and just makes you doubt yourself.

Hi. Yes I'm quite fed up too. We've been trying since I had my copper coil removed in March 2022. We've missed 3 cycles here and there. I'm just starting cycle 15. Waiting for my first appointment following our fertility referral and hoping they will at least order some more tests. We've already had some tests (some of which were private) and there's nothing that has flagged as to why it's taking so long.

I am totally fed up and sympathise! Doesn't help that everyone else has been popping out babies left and right.

@Hiddenvoice I'm pleased to hear that it finally worked for you! We've heard a few times that as soon as people stop trying it works!
Will need to try and work on that more... or not try! 🤞

@Hiddenvoice ^ that was still me 😅 I was trying to change my username earlier. I'm still very new to this so not sure how it works 😅

@LucyLoopyLu
It really doesn't help does it! We've had a few friends say it had worked first time too and that really gets to us!
I do always try to keep the faith but it's hard every month when AF arrives.
We had to have private tests done too, just to help keep things moving along otherwise it just adds more months to the process.

What tests are left for you?

@Natty2 its much easier said than done , I kept saying we would stop ttc but each month I’d want to try again. I guess I only stopped because I was told to. I was desperate for a baby and was very upset at first as I felt I was kissing my chance but the longer I went without ttc the happier I became. My dh and I had even spoke about maybe going down other avenues and that children might not be for us when I realised I was late.

@Natty2 my husband has had 2 SA. Something bame back slightly below optimum range both times, but it was different - 1st time motility, 2nd time morphology. They were 6-ish months apart. But overall count was very high which offsets some of the concerns about slightly low %s.

I've had AMH testing (twice), an ultrasound scan with antral follicle count, and hormone testing (day 3 and day 21). Everything came back normal except I have high testosterone. Doesn't surprise me as I have severe hormonal acne (according to dermatologist).
I would like to have another ultrasound with AFC as I had 28 total (left and right ovary together) and if it was 30 then with the high T I would be diagnosed with PCOS. I think this is fairly likely but in my case probably mild. I have fairly regular cycles and day 21 test shows I'm ovulating so it shouldn't be the reason I'm not conceiving, but it would be useful to know.

Only other thing I believe is to check tubes are clear. Unless I am missing something.

How about you?

Gonna jump on here, have nothing helpful to offer but nice to be with people who know the struggle!
Cycle 15 no luck yet 😪 lap & dye done and all clear, day 21 test shows I am ovulating but not had day 3 tests yet...

@missmoosh oh hi 🖐 fancy seeing you here

@LucyLoopyLu sounds like you've had most of the tests. I've had the same, but also the tube dye test a couple of weeks ago. Hopefully you can get booked in for that when you have the fertility consultation 🤞

@LucyLoopyLu Hahaha we meet again 😂😂

@missmoosh it's exhausting isn't it?! good luck for the blood test hopefully you can get that booked in soon 🤞
I'm going to try and take the advice on here and maybe go easy this next cycle.. starting with no bbt measuring, it can become so obsessing to wonder what each day means 😫

@Natty2 it really is, I am hoping to contact doctors tomorrow to ask them for repeats of everything ahead of my gynaecologist appointment in October. So that I can at least speed up any next steps!

Pressed send to soon, yeah I sometimes enjoy taking a month not tracking if nothing else its a mental break for a moment from it all.

@missmoosh mine is in October too, good luck!

@Natty2 we will have to keep each other updated as to what they say!
I have just contacted the GP to request repeats of all of the bloods and got my husband to ask for a repeat SA. Hoping then if it's all normal I can just be referred straight through to IVF... odd that I'm excited about that prospect 😂

@missmoosh definitely!
If it's helpful, as well as the hormone blood tests they also need to do a Rubella test before IVF. What's annoying is I had mine bloods done last month and they didn't test for it so I'm having to get it re done next week 🙄
I do hope they can get you on the IVF list soon if that's the route. We were really disappointed when we were told we had to wait until we had tried naturally for 2 years before getting on the NHS IVF list, because they still hope it will work naturally. It might be different if you are over 35, but we are 34!

@Natty2 funnily enough I requested that one too, as I had heard it mentioned previously!
So we tried for several months a while ago but stopped due to health reasons and a wedding! So we have actually been trying over 2 years now. Though I personally don't count the several months as my thyroid was out of control so there was no chances!
How frustrating for you! When is your 2 years done? Are you able to get everything set up so you can go straight for ivf if you haven't been successful?

@missmoosh hopefully once I've had my blood test next week and my husband gets his SA next month following his procedure, then we should be all good to go! 2 years will be Jan 2024, so not that far away... but still feels like ages after all this time!

@Natty2 I hope the time passes quickly for you! My original gynaecologist appointment was January, so I totally understand the feeling! Fingers crossed you won't even need it!

OK GP has agreed to do day 21 and rubella test but not day 3 ones...guess I will have to wait for the gynaecologist to ask for those. Looked at my cycle predication, I will be right in the middle of a cycle at the appointment, so be a couple weeks after until I can even get them done!!! Hoping they can put me forward for ivf without them though 🙏

@missmoosh good luck! Roll on October 🎉

Hi @Natty2

I just wanted to join you and say that I’m sorry you’re going through this. It really is so crap!!
AF arrived yesterday and we are officially at 18 months now too and not a hint of BFP.

Although I have very supportive friends and family no one we know has taken this long to conceive so as much as they try and understand it’s difficult for them to know what to say etc.

Sorry to hear we’re all in this position and I hope it’ll be our turn soon!

I'm in the same boat, 18 months (and just approaching the end of something like cycle 20 with BFNs despite a ridiculous amount of dtd over the holidays) and just feeling really shite. I've only got a couple of months more left in me before I think it's time to close the door on this and accept there will be no DC3.

@Foreverhopeful92
I'm sorry to hear it's been so long for you too! Completely understand that it's not the same when speaking to family and friends. That's part of the reason why I joined this forum when my last AF arrived, so we can hopefully find support in each other!
How are your tests going? Have you managed to see a specialist?

@curliegirlie I'm sorry it's been so long for you too! I'm new to the forum lingo, but is that for trying for baby 3? How did you get on previously?