Would you try for a December baby

[Lola19]

I don’t know if I’m being silly here.. I think we have missed our chance to conceive this month which I am gutted about. However next month would mean a December and then a January baby. I always feel sorry for my friends born in December/Jan as I feel their birthdays get overlooked a bit.. plus I can imagine it is difficult buying birthday and Christmas presents for your little one at the same time! So just wondering if anyone has an opinion on whether they would intentionally miss out trying for a December baby or am I being ridiculous because at the end of the day that could be the month that we do fall?

It all depends on you, really. My birthday is Christmas Day and my parents made it absolutely amazing and special for me, every year. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

December birthdays are not great if you are sporty as many sports are now based on calendar year.

They are good for 3 year old funding though.

My view is that Feb / March is the best time to have a baby.

Middle of academic year
Good for sports
3 year old funding kicks in from 1st April
Not heavily pregnant in the heat of summer
When a baby is born you are generally in a “newborn haze” for a few weeks. By the time that lifts the weather will be starting to get nice and you will be able to enjoy a lovely summer hanging out with your baby in beer gardens.

No, I wanted to avoid a summer born baby, firstly because I didn't want to be heavily pregnant over summer and also because of the potential disadvantages of always being one of the youngest in their school year (I'm august born so have experience of this). It took 6 months to conceive ds1, who has a February birthday. Second time round conceived straight away, with October due date, miscarried at 12 weeks. Conceived ds2 2 months later, he has a march birthday. So you can't always plan these things.

My birthday and both my siblings birthdays are December. It's always been a magical time for us as everyone is in a celebratory mood and there's a lovely atmosphere everywhere. However, my mums was very early January and she said no one had any money left after Christmas for presents and no one ever wanted to go out anywhere and the atmosphere in restaurants etc was flat.

Rather a December or January baby than a July /august baby because they go to school at a younger age (yes I know you can opt them out until the next year but still)

As an adult approaching 50 I'd say as a child I loved having a birthday just before Christmas. The older I get the more I hate it. Everyone is either travelling away to see family or out at Christmas work parties.

My DH has a birthday just before January payday. He thought that was pretty shit , until he saw the reality of a Christmas birthday.

We now both celebrate our birthdays on DH's birthday in January, it's a lovely way to brighten up the end of a long dark month. All the local restaurants have amazing deals to tempt people in, and it's just so much nicer than the madness of December

I have a mid Jan birthday and that is absolutely fine! In fact half of my family has Jan birthdays and its never been a problem.
However, I will personally be avoiding a Christmas baby, because I dont want to miss Christmas myself!!!
so Im planning on trying in May. I would also avoid July August, but mostly because being heavily pregnant during the summer sounds horrendous!

Must admit, as a pp said, unless I had had a really hard time trying to get pregnant, and trying for several years, I would be avoiding trying to conceive in March and April if possible. As a few other posters said, I have known a few people over the years who had December and January birthdays and they really hated it. (Moreso the people born in the second half of December and the first half of January.) Obviously the further away from Christmas it is, the better.

Like, I know 3 people with 23rd January, 27th January, and 29th January birthdays, and they say it's just far enough after Christmas to not be 'spoilt.' Ditto December... I know 2 people 7th December, and 9th December, and they say it's just far enough away. But the people I know born between say 15th December, and 10th of January did not like their birthday where it was, and wished constantly as a child that it was somewhere else in the year. (Indeed, a few of them wish it was somewhere else in the year as an adult...)

They either got forgotten by some people, OR got the dreaded 'joint Christmas/birthday gift.' So mean! If someone had a birthday in May, you wouldn't give them a Christmas present in December and say 'oh by the way, this is for your birthday on May 17th as well' would you?! So why is it OK to do it to a person who has a December/early January birthday?

Sometimes people have no choice! A friend of mine was only having one child ever, and her first born was a girl. (Born November 2016.) She and her daughter and DH were a little solid family unit, and were never having any more. (Had her at 29.) Then out of the blue, just after the little girl turned 3 years old, my friend discovered she was 5 months pregnant. No clue, still had periods, and couldn't remember ever missing a pill. (Put it down to a 2-3 day tummy bug later!) She kept the baby, another girl, who was born Christmas Eve 2019.

I think (and I could be making this up) that the majority of babies born in the 2 weeks leading up to Christmas day, and the 2 weeks after, are probably not planned (for that particular time...) I mean, most certainly wanted but not planned for around Christmas. I think most people in an ideal world would plan to have their baby between February and November if possible! (Just my musings!)

Well, I don’t know about that @HeavenIsAHalfpipe ! My brothers birthday is 28th December and it has never bothered him. It perhaps depends on how important Christmas is to you. I’m no Scrooge and I enjoy it but it isn’t a huge deal either.

We decided to start trying March 2020 and it happened that month, despite me being 39 at the time. Second time around it took six months and I was 41/42. Ideally I’d probably have missed October/November to avoid a late summer baby, but that’s what I’m having, so … To be honest, given the choice I’d probably have opted for dec/jan again over July and august but we get what we get.

I think a baby is a blessing whenever he/she arrives and not many of us have the luxury of choosing when it is conceived. I remember my friend thought she would be able to pick time of year baby was born and soon found out it wasn't that straightforward! I struggled to conceive both of my children so any due date where baby arrived safely I was more than happy. I have an early Jan baby and although it is a busy time it is actually lovely to have a birthday to look forward to after the Christmas celebrations.

As a PP said I think a December/January baby is better than a Leap Day baby who only has their true birth date to celebrate every four years 😬 it’s a leap year next year so some babies conceived this spring/summer could arrive then!

I think (and I could be making this up) that the majority of babies born in the 2 weeks leading up to Christmas day, and the 2 weeks after, are probably not planned (for that particular time...)
Perhaps if your experience of pregnancy is just about having some sex. For us, we just tired every month from the moment we were married until it happened for 2.5 years. I knew we'd struggled, I don't like condoms so being fussy would have meant coming on and off the pill every few months. Craziness.
For Dtwins they were 2nd month Clomifene babies but I was 37, grateful we'd been given the medicine so quickly. Due early Jan, born mid Dec so destined to hate their life forever clearly

Rather narrows the ttc window tho

Thanks for all your responses ladies! I really enjoyed reading all your thoughts and opinions! I hadn’t thought about baby being early or late… and it’s really good to read all your positive experiences with dec/jan birthdays! And I hadn’t even considered the July/August birthday education thing! My first baby was born in July which I’ve always thought was a nice month for him to have a birthday! I guess there are positives and negatives with any month! And it’s lovely to hear that so many people really love their Christmas/January birthdays! I hadn’t really considered that a January birthday could brighten such a dull month!
I’m 36 (37 in august) I don’t have any known fertility issues but my ovulation day varies each month so makes it difficult to time BD on the best days so I don’t think I have all the time in the world! I’ll definitely go ahead with trying because at the end of the day I’d rather have my little baby in my arms regardless of the month!

@wonderofu your first comment didn’t bother me at all, I just took your opinion on the chin but your second reply was just rude saying that “ the OP needs to get real and get myself a life”. It’s clear from the number of people replying that they would prefer not to have a dec/jan or aug/July baby that I’m not the only one to think that way. And what’s wrong with considering how your future baby will feel about a Christmas birthday? As I said before I have friends who do not like their Christmas/January birthdays due to it being overshadowed and people not being free to help celebrate! It’s only a discussion to see what others thought! That’s what this forum is for. I’d personally never want to make someone feel bad for thinking differently to me. I hope whatever it is that has made you bitter towards others gets resolved and you find happiness! Baby dust to you ✨

I was born in mid-December, should have been Christmas Day. My birthday was never overlooked - my parents ensured this didn't happen - and I still love all the decorations and celebratory atmosphere around for my birthday. Better than July!

DS was born on Christmas day 1994. Christmas day went:

Early hours: stockings, then tea and biscuits.

Mass 9.30.

Smoked salmon sandwiches and champagne: 11.30ish followed by Christmas presents.

Lunch: 3.30ish - DC usually taken to park beforehand by grandparents with new bikes, scooters, etc.

6pm: tea, birthday cake and birthday presents.

Party: first Saturday after school started back. Another pile of birthday presents.

It's a very, very special birthday shared with Jesus.

DD was born late May and I must confess it was much easier to be up to feed at 5am as the sun was rising rather than than in the darkest days of bleak winter. More difficult in many ways because from 15 until about 22 she always had her birthday overshadowed with GCSEs, A'Levels and then her degree. Also it often co-incided with Whitsun so she rarely had her birthday at school either.

@Lola19 I think it's the right call given your age (no offense meant, I had mine at 33 and 38). Good luck and may you fall at the first sperm 😂

Your choice but I think trying to control something utterly uncontrollable is a bit fruitless. What if those two months were the one you got pregnant? All months have pros and cons.

I'm still wavering so much on whether to TTC next cycle or not. If I fell pregnant, baby would be due end of December.... I'm 37 this summer though so don't feel I have the luxury of 'wasting' a cycle.

My baby was due 1st March and was born 4th December. Not something you can control unfortunately! I wouldn't skip because ultimately it wont matter when your baby is born and you cant control it anyway x

DH and I always joked we'd have a December baby as our 2 nephews and niece are all December babies too! And lo and behold, DD1 is a December baby!

So we have 4 birthday in our family within 8 days of each other, on the run up to Christmas. The kids all love it (now 10, 6, 6, & 3) we always celebrate birthdays separately to Christmas and try to avoid joint gifts for birthday & Christmas. And so far for birthday parties, they all usually get a decent turn out (but you do have to start planning well in advance!)

For DD1, we don't go crazy with gifts for birthday and Christmas if we think they're will be something big to buy in the summer (large garden toys, bike, etc)

I was due on the 31st Jan ... twice....

DC1 was early and has a Jan birthday, DC2 was late and a Feb birthday.

I don't think either of them mind being so early in the year.

I get the instinct to try to make life perfect for your child but you are going to have to let go of the idea that you can plan everything to avoid even the most minor inconvenience, which is what a December/January birthday might be. Or it might not be. My nephew loves his New Year’s bday because our extended family from all over the country are together, which would never happen on a random weekday in February. Nobody forgets his bday, in fact he gets a big cake and a lot more attention than he would otherwise. Haven’t you ever heard the saying “life happens to you when you’re busy making other plans”? If you haven’t learned that yet you definitely will once you become a parent.

I had a christmas day baby 😅🙈 but wouldn't change it - you cant plan everything and sometimes babies come really early anyway so would ruin any well crafted plansa (friends was 7 weeks early!) So I would say just let it happen and enjoy whatever season baby arrives in 🥰

Yes I would. There is often something. September birthday would be shared with niece recently born. Feb it's Dh and his Dad's birthday. Also several spring babies in family. July/August it is hot and they will be youngest in the year. Basically if I wanted to be too fussy I could write off several months of the year 😅