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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Saw the GP today...

469 replies

Got2besoon · 07/11/2022 12:10

Well after 16 months of ttc number 2 and one mmc at the start, I finally bit the bullet and saw the GP this morning.

She was lovely and she's going to order some bloods and a sperm analysis for DH. She also took a swab today (for Chlamydia I think).

I'm sad that I'm at this point and a little angry too. I thought my DS would have a sibling by now and I just want this fertility journey to be over. Definitely grateful to have DS but fearful no more will come.

Is anyone else at a similar stage in their fertility journey?

OP posts:
oliveroses · 13/03/2023 09:06

@vitahelp - thanks, all okay here so far but I am very anxious! It's around this time that my last pregnancy miscarried so I'm on high alert and probably will be for the rest of the week. I am praying I can get to week 6 and I'll work out a new coping strategy after that, probably also involving a private scan. Very few symptoms but trying not to think about it - I've had enough that I am not panicking. I only tested the once as I have had bad experiences (both ways) with charting line progression before, so trying to stay calm and not overthink.

I know exactly how you feel, especially with respect to being a year on. I was shocked when I thought of it like that too - I couldn't believe that much time had passed. About a month ago I read a blog post/podcast by Emma Grey called How To Get Pregnant Fast - it's online. There is one post about how it can just take time and how part of the key to success is simply having the mental resilience to stay in the game for as long as it takes. I found that really heartening and calming and it might be worth a quick listen x

vitahelp · 14/03/2023 10:06

@oliveroses I'm so glad everything seems fine so far! And that makes total sense why you aren't testing and looking for line progression. Did you have many symptoms when you were first pregnant with your son? (not to say this pregnancy would necessarily be the same). Have you told anyone IRL aside from your DH?

Thank you for recommending the blog, I'll have a look for that this evening. I'm definitely not one to give up on things easily (if ever). It stems from being an only child and being used to getting what I want. I just hope if the time does come to give up that I can do it for the sake of my own sanity and my family. The trouble is I'm not sure at what point that time comes, and do you ever really 'give up' trying, or is it still there in the background?

TheBirdintheCave · 14/03/2023 11:19

Finally got a temp rise! Should have O confirmed as Sunday in a few days time. Odds aren't good though as we only dtd O-4 and O-2. AF due March 26th.

oliveroses · 14/03/2023 23:05

@vitahelp thank you - I didn't have symptoms with my son, no. Not for ages! I have thought hard about what giving up would look like for me and I still don't know the answer. Would I stop taking a conception vitamin? Maybe. Drink caffeine again? Not sure. I think as long as I wasn't on contraception there'd always be a hopeful part of me. It would take a really long time - or major life events - to forget about where I was in my cycle etc.

@TheBirdintheCave hoorah! Fingers crossed anyway. Glad that things are seeming a bit clearer!

Keeptrying32 · 15/03/2023 18:20

@Got2besoon Glad that your tests got darker. I do agree they are best for pregnant or not rather than looking at progression. It is very easy to say as it is so anxiety inducing but try not to worry.
@oliveroses Congratulations. Fingers crossed that this one sticks for you.
Hopefully the positive tests keep coming.

@TheBirdintheCave O-2 is one of the best days as it gives time for the sperm to get there and be waiting for the egg so deffo a possibility.

I ovulated a bit late this month going by LH tests and mucus so I’m about 9dpo today. I’ve had a few twinges this evening and I normally start spotting day 10 and period is 13 dpo. Honestly don’t feel that this is my month. I’ve yet to book our fertility assessment appointment. DH is on a course for the next 5 weeks and is due to be away in my fertile window next month so I’m coming to terms that I won’t have a baby by Christmas. Going to call on Friday to get an appointment lined up for when he finishes his course I think. I’m hoping they may offer me clomiphene initially as I’m not sure I want to go the whole way to IVF.

Original poster
Got2besoon · 15/03/2023 23:06

@vitahelp I'm sorry you're feeling negative but I think it's so understandable. Every month I got a negative took a little piece of my hope and it is utterly draining and, at times, all consuming.

@TheBirdintheCave Woohoo, gotta love that temp rise! I've heard o-2 is the ideal day, so fingers well and truly crossed for you.

@Keeptrying32 Good to hear your update but I'm sorry you're not feeling it this month. But... you just never know!

I completely understand your reservation to go for IVF, though I suppose I'm now really biased as the Clomid worked for me. However, it does seem like something worth trying that is much less of a commitment than IVF and success rates seem quite good from all the research I did.

OP posts:
IHateLegDay · 16/03/2023 00:33

I'm so happy to see your tests are getting darker! Good luck xxx

vitahelp · 16/03/2023 08:05

@oliveroses I hope all is ok for you. I was the same with my DD, no symptoms at the start and not many throughout the whole pregnancy really. I know exactly what you mean, my cycles are quite regular so I will always be quite aware of when I am fertile and when the 2WW is happening. Like you, unless I started using contraception again I would always be 'trying' and 'hoping' to some extent.

@TheBirdintheCave Our timings are very similar this cycle, I think I ovulated Sat/Sun and AF is also due around 26 March.

@Keeptrying32 I'm sorry you're not feeling too confident about this month. I tend to feel that way most months these days, but at least I'm not getting my hopes up too much which means the disappointment is also reducing slightly.
I can understand the disappointment regarding the Christmas milestone. I recently realised that if I don't fall pregnant this cycle I would be rolling over to 2024 which was a difficult one to get my head round.

@Got2besoon How are you doing now? Are you still testing/temp charting?

Keeptrying32 · 17/03/2023 08:25

So started spotting yesterday and major cramps this morning so I am out this month. Going to call the clinic this morning and get the ball rolling. We may not have a baby this year but there is still time to get pregnant. This cycle I’m going to focus on loosing the bit of extra weight I’m still carrying as DH will be away. Going to do it gently as don’t want to stress my body but hopefully then I will be in better shape for any pregnancy.

fingers crossed for positives for @TheBirdintheCave and @vitahelp this month.

Keeptrying32 · 17/03/2023 10:06

Blood test and scan with clinic appointment all booked- not until next month with DH’s working away but feel like progress being made.

Original poster
Got2besoon · 17/03/2023 18:58

@vitahelp I'm feeling like I'm a little bit in limbo land until my early scan. I've had a lot of nightmares about getting bad news and I've still not had any morning sickness, so that's not reassuring me much (I did have MS with my DS at this point, but never got any MS when I had my MMC). I'm trying to just be grateful for the 'here and now' but that's easier said than done.

I took a ClearBlue 'how many weeks' test a few days ago and it came up as 3+ so that was nice. I had been delaying using it in case I didn't get the 3+ 😅

It's funny, I genuinely did not foresee any of this stress when TTC and saw the big hurdle as getting pregnant.

I'm sorry AF seems to be on her way @Keeptrying32 but it must be nice to have a definite plan to focus on. For me, it was a relief to put the responsibility onto someone else when it had been on my shoulders for >12 months.

OP posts:
TheBirdintheCave · 17/03/2023 19:19

@Keeptrying32 Thanks! Sorry AF got you ☹️

oliveroses · 17/03/2023 22:16

@Keeptrying32 that's great that you made the appointment. Focusing on losing a little bit of weight really helped me (and might again) as even if that month I was out I started to feel a bit better about myself and it gave me something to be a little bit more confident about x

vitahelp · 17/03/2023 22:26

@Keeptrying32 I’m sorry you’re out for this month but that’s great that you’ve booked your tests. I had these done last month (DH has his scheduled for next month) and it gave me a sense of control back and something else to focus on that the usual ovulation/2 week wait cycle.

@Got2besoon It sounds like you’re dealing with it so well, that must have been very reassuring seeing 3 weeks come up on the Clearblue test. When I was pregnant with DD I was quite laid back throughout the pregnancy, whereas I sense that this time round (if I do ever get pregnant) I will be much more nervous since it will have been such a long journey to get to that point.

Keeptrying32 · 18/03/2023 08:19

Thanks everyone. I’m trying to keep positive. Definitely going to focus a bit on my health as a whole rather than just the TTC. I’m trying to exercise more and I’m swimming again. Last time I was this active just for me was just before I was pregnant with DS so maybe it is something. @oliveroses I lost half a kg which isn’t much so far but I already see a difference so you are right.

@Got2besoon It is completely understandable to be anxious after trying for so long. But it is good the test says 3+. Remember each pregnancy is different. I had hardly any sickness at all with DS and even then it wasn’t until about 8 weeks. Hopefully an early scan will reassure you.

It is so lovely to have this thread as a support. I’ll update you all with the outcome of our appointment when it happens but in the meantime will stick around for your updates and hopefully see some more positives soon.

Original poster
Got2besoon · 26/03/2023 12:01

How are all of you ladies getting on?

I've been incredibly anxious the last couple of weeks, and constantly wondering if my pregnancy symptoms are 'strong enough'.

I'm 7 weeks today and I just got back from the reassurance scan I booked; all is good, and baby measuring right on track with a lovely heartbeat! I can't quite believe it. I didn't even let DH come because then we would have had to bring DS and I didn't want him to see me upset if it was bad news. Thankfully I have some little, blurry photos to share with them :D

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oliveroses · 26/03/2023 12:37

That is such lovely news @Got2besoon ! I've been wondering how things are going. You must be delighted!

All is okay here though I have a bad cold and freaked out yesterday as my temp hit 38 - as soon as it reached that point it started to climb down again but I am a real worrier and terrified this will have some kind of bad effect. I haven't booked a scan yet - my DH is in two minds and I don't know where to go. But now that I've been ill I'm more tempted ...

Original poster
Got2besoon · 26/03/2023 12:49

@oliveroses It is a tricky decision to make Re the scan for sure. I was half regretting it this morning as I hardly slept last night and my heart was racing all morning with the anxiety.

I know what you mean about the worry with a fever. I had covid during my mmc and that's put me on high alert for this one. It sounds like yours wasn't too high, which is great and hopefully it stays down now. Every little thing is a big worry isn't it?!

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oliveroses · 26/03/2023 13:29

@Got2besoon that's exactly what I'm worried about. Just had another chat with DH and for some reason he's really not for a scan - guess I did a good job of talking us out of it last week. Ugh.

TheBirdintheCave · 26/03/2023 13:57

AF is due tomorrow for me, my temp is falling and I've started spotting so I'm out. Last natural cycle now before IVF starts around April 28th.

Original poster
Got2besoon · 26/03/2023 14:55

Good luck @TheBirdintheCave I've seen so many stories of success the month before IVF, so there must be something in it!

Have you seen the Alex Jones documentary on IVF in Kings? I found it really interesting and enjoyable to watch, although certainly emotional at times.

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TheBirdintheCave · 26/03/2023 15:07

@Got2besoon Yeah I watched it as that's our clinic :) Haven't found them to be that nice so far though 😂

We did hit the jackpot in 2020 with our son who was conceived the cycle before IVF :) Hopefully it will happen again but I think I'll probably still lose the next one.

Original poster
Got2besoon · 26/03/2023 17:27

@TheBirdintheCave Oh, no way! I'm sorry to hear your experience wasn't as good. It's funny, I've worked with a few TV vets who are not as cheery and empathetic in real life when compared to their TV personas! I guess they have their best bedside manner when those cameras are rolling.

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oliveroses · 26/03/2023 22:26

@TheBirdintheCave all fingers crossed for you!

TheBirdintheCave · 26/03/2023 22:52

@oliveroses @Got2besoon Thanks guys :) Either way we've lost out on some money now :/ I have to buy the IVF meds before we'll be able to find out if our last natural cycle worked and there are no refunds. So if we get pregnant this cycle it will have cost us £1k 🤦🏻‍♀️🙄