Preparing to TTC in 2023

[DanisEndo]

Hi,

I'm part of a lovely thread which was started in 2021 for those planning to start TTC in 2022 and it was such a supportive group! we've now seen lots of positives and given each other a lot of support and tips through ups and downs.

I'm now 'pausing' TTC until after my wedding in 2023 and thought it'd be nice to start up a similar thread to see if there is anyone else now prepping and getting excited for next year!

On the last thread everyone introduced themself by saying their age, what they're trying for and when they plan on starting - I'll then keep a list up to date and post so everyone can easily see others who are at the same stage as them!

I'll go first:

Age: 27
TTC no: 1
Starting: Sep 23

Between now and then I'm going to be taking folic acid, try and loose some lbs to get closer to a healthy BMI, save some money in a baby pot and enjoy some 'baby free' activities (i.e., wine, gin, sushi and surfing!). I have endometriosis and PCOS so going to try and get my periods more regular and pain management via diet.

Hello! Can I join?
I am 31 and will be TTC baby number 1 in January/Feb 2023! I’ve started prenatals and haven’t told a soul as worried about the pressure 😳😆

Forgot to add, I will be 27 this month :)

Trying

@Weefreetiffany No.2
@WanOvaryKenobi 30, No.1
@louloulollipop 31, No.1

TTC 2023

January
@Mushroo 31, No.1

February
@marleyandme 27, No.1
@babybrainfart 33, No.3
@winterbabyrose No.2

March
@happyfeet5 No.1

June
@ViewFromTheAfternoon 29, No.1

September
@DanisEndo27, No.1

Trying

@Weefreetiffany No.2
@WanOvaryKenobi 30, No.1
@louloulollipop 31, No.1

TTC 2023

January
@Mushroo 31, No.1

February
@marleyandme 27, No.1
@babybrainfart 33, No.3
@winterbabyrose 27, No.2

March
@happyfeet5No.1

June
@ViewFromTheAfternoon 29, No.1

September
@DanisEndo 27, No.1

Just to add my periods have been all over the place since an illness last year…but I’ve been having acupuncture to try and regulate them over the last few months ready for 2023!!

@Almondbut hi! We in exactly the same position :) (I’m 31 and also starting Jan). Hopefully the acupuncture works - please report back!

Id managed to get my cycle super regular through supplements and exercise, then I got covid in September, had a really long cycle and I’m just hoping this one is back to normal.

Trying

@Weefreetiffany No.2
@WanOvaryKenobi 30, No.1
@louloulollipop 31, No.1

TTC 2023

January
@Mushroo 31, No.1
@Almondbut 31, No.1

February
@marleyandme 27, No.1
@babybrainfart 33, No.3
@winterbabyrose 27, No.2

March
@happyfeet5 No.1

June
@ViewFromTheAfternoon 29, No.1

September
@DanisEndo 27, No.1

Is anyone hinting of their plans to family or just keeping it to themselves? I don’t think mine will be expecting it at all, as I’ve not been dropping any hints and we are hardly the most common age where it’s not much of a shock, ie late 20s early 30s.

@happyfeet5we’re not telling family but we’re not that close. (We see them regularly but aren’t the type to really confide in family). We’ve also been married awhile so we’re kind of out of that stage where it’s expected.

Friends wise I’m not telling but we’ve hinted casually we might have a family ‘in the next few years’. I might tell a couple of very close friends before the 12 week scan if we’re successful, just because if I do miscarry I’d like some support.

@Mushroo makes sense letting some people know.
I think my main worry around telling people would be, telling them and then it taking forever. I’m worried about that anyway, to be honest. I know given our age we are unlikely to have issues, but even so… I’m still on contraception. Before contraception I had really heavy and painful periods, sometimes I get a niggle in the back of my mind and I wonder if it’s endo being masked by the artificial hormones. I don’t think you can ever take anything for granted!

I’ve told my mum and sister…and some friends I’ve hinted at a family “in the next few years” like @Mushroo.

I know when I’m stressed my period goes all weird and I get long cycles etc - so I really want to keep it private so people don’t ask the inevitable “any news yet?” and make me feel under pressure!!

I’m just praying it happens quickly (as we all are of course!!)

How ‘sure’ do you all feel? I have days of feeling so broody and ready…and then other days of not broody at all but knowing that realistically this is a good time to try etc
Maybe you never feel 100% ready??

@Almondbut completely understandable! Cycles respond to stress don’t they for so many.

That’s a really good question. Personally, I am constantly broody. I’ve always wanted to be a mummy, and now I think it’s less just wanting a baby to nurture specifically but more feeling like someone in missing from our family. I think that feels like the mark of being ready.
There are days when I really doubt myself but I am an over thinker naturally anyway - are you? Some days I wake up and think, this will change my whole entire life, forever, what if I miss the old version of me like so many people on here do. We could do with new carpets and a new sideboard. There’s always an extra holiday we could take. That is just it, I don’t think you can ever feel 100% ready and something always crops up. You have hit the nail on the head. I think there will always be a reason not to for everyone if you search enough. Though, if anyone disagrees that’s fine too obviously!

@Almondbut i feel the same as you. Growing up I was always fairly sure I didn’t want kids so it’s been a bit of a turnaround.

a few months ago I was really excited, but now it’s getting closer to trying it all feels a bit real! It keeps coming back to though I know I want a family, so I keep focussed on that and try not to let the ‘what ifs’ get in the way. Like @happyfeet5 im a chronic overthinker, and I’m trying not to do that and just see what happens. (She says, having tracked each cycle to within an inch of its life for the past 6 months).

You both talk a lot of sense!!

Love how we are all over thinkers! Can’t wait to get started with you girls in 2023 🎉🤞

@Almondbut @Mushroo
I could have written both of your last messages!
I spent the first 25 years of my life adamant I didn't want kids and have only been getting my head around wanting them for a few months now but the broodiness is so strong! I'd say I'm 95% confident now, I still wake up some mornings thinking it's not for me but that feeling passes pretty quick.

I've told one friend that it's something we're thinking about, would not tell family as it'd be constant questions! Can't stop talking about kids with my OH now though, he's more excited than me! We keep talking about who we'd tell first and how soon though 😊

@marleyandme how lovely, so exciting to have those conversations isn’t it.

Nosey question alert, has anyone saved before TTC? Thinking to cover maternity leave, if you’re going to take it

@happyfeet5 I have told my mum and sister because we are really close. I do feel like I might feel the pressure but at the same time, if it takes us a while to conceive I will want to confide in my mum and sister. I also just find it so hard to not mention because I can't wait and it's just always on my mind so it's super hard not to talk about it. Also in answer to your question about saving.. we haven't saved for it. We do have savings but they are specifically house savings. I do want to save a bit for maternity though so once I get pregnant (if I do) we will save during that time and if we need to dip into our house savings we will. Not putting too much pressure on that though as practically everyone I know didn't save and have done fine

@Almondbut oh god I go through stages of "I need a baby RIGHT NOW I can't possibly wait any longer" to "actually I don't know if it's for me..." But overall, the wanting is stronger and I know that I want a family. Those other moments are just cold feet and overthinking. I worry about if I will cope though and the fear of the unknown is terrifying.

@ViewFromTheAfternoon yes I think it’s over exaggerated how many people actually save beforehand. You’ve 9 months to save once you know and a further 6 months for most people to save full pay when DC is here.
I had an exciting thought earlier… for some of us, this time next year life may look very different!!!

Hello everyone!

I am planning to start TTC in January. I will just have turned 37 by then (36 at the mo, birthday in December) and it will be my first baby.

I have suffered from severe PCOS for years (sometimes with only one or two periods each year) but as I’ve got older, they have become more regular thankfully. I am scared that I have left it too late - and will be the oldest on here by a long way! - but it would have been very difficult to get pregnant up until last year as my periods were so infrequent. My doctor explained that one silver lining of PCOS is that women can experience “delayed fertility” where periods become more regular after age 35 and are usually able to conceive up to age 44. Menopause is also meant to come about four years later for PCOS women. But who knows?! I really hope I’m able to conceive but some days it just seems difficult to imagine.

I am taking Pregnacare Conception Max (the ones with the omega capsules), inofolic alpha sachets, folic acid and additional vitamin D as lots of women with PCOS have a deficiency in this.

Good luck to everyone! xx

And I forgot to add - my periods are now every 4-6 weeks instead of one or two a year! I had lost a small amount of weight but the big improvement seems to have been since I hit age 36… Weird but my doctor says she has seen it before with women with PCOS as they get older (something about the extra follicules on the ovary declining, which helps ovulation).

Hopefully this brings some hope to any other ladies with PCOS who currently have very irregular periods! 🙏

@happyfeet5 were saving but not specifically for mat leave. I think we’ll just have to take it as it comes. Luckily I get 22 weeks full pay, but I’m the higher earner so realistically I might only be abLe to take about 10 months. But I’m going to tell work I want 12 months and then I can always go back earlier if I want to.

@bethhop85 welcome! Good to have another person on the PCOS journey. Sounds like you’re heading in the right direction :)

@happyfeet5 we're going to start saving when we get a BFP, we figure we've got 9 months from then! Also been spending on getting our house ready atm so have no money right now 😂

@Mushroo wow, that’s a really generous entitlement. I get that! It’s hard to say how much time you’ll want off until you’re in that position I guess

@marleyandme oh no! House related decor and furniture really does just have a way of gobbling up all your money, doesn’t it!

All this baby business is occupying my brain a lot more than it probably should - oops! Hahaha.

I'm really happy to have a place to talk about this stuff. It's always on my mind and I drive DH mad always going on about it, so I try not to. Then all of my friends either already have kids or don't want them so I feel like I just have no one to talk about all this with because no one relates or is in a similar position.

There's so many pre pregnancy/conception vitamins it's quite overwhelming!

Are you guys planning on properly planning out when to DTD and tracking ovulation etc or just come off contraception and see what happens?

Also is anyone else trying to lose a bit of weight before TTC? I have gone up two sizes since COVID and have been trying to shift the extra weight but just can't. I'm really struggling. I have a desk job so that really doesn't help

@happyfeet5 yeh I’m really lucky! I’m quite new in my job though so a bit nervous about telling work if it happens quickly, but they’ll have to deal with it!

@ViewFromTheAfternoon it is all so overwhelming! I’m theory I should be ovulation around new year, so given we’re both off work should be able to do lots of DTD. I sort of vaguely know when I usually ovulate but I’m going to hold
off using ovulation tests to begin with I think… try and keep it fun! I’m sure I’ll soon change my mind and become obsessive though. I was really healthy over the summer, but autumn has meant I’ve fallen out of my good routines. I really need to try and get back on it, but making good food choices is hard when it’s so cold outside! Are you planning to track or just see what happens?