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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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IVFers thread

839 replies

TheMNPeacekeepingForce · 23/12/2007 18:51

Anyone fancy starting an ongoing thread for those who are having IVF/ are planning to try again via IVF soon?

Ds was conceived via IVF - he's now 2.6 and we're stepping back on the scary rollercoaster ride with a FET - I started taking the drugs yesterday!

OP posts:
sootykalucy · 23/04/2008 17:41

I think it's good to dip in and out of. . the headings are quite good like that. . . . you can sort out what is relevant to you.

nomoremagnolia · 24/04/2008 11:42

Hi girls - can I ask when might I start getting side-effects / menopausal symptoms from the downregging? I'm feeling fine today (started the spray yesterday am) but am worrying about how I might feel when the symptoms kick in!

sootykalucy · 24/04/2008 14:27

Hi nomore, the first week or so was fine for me, the last one (week three) I have had more headaches and generally feeling like I am in constant PMT. I have to say it hasn't been that bad, but then I know that I experience PMT quite mildly compared to my friends.

I had my scan/blood tests today and I am responding well so I am a booked in to start taking the menopur in a week. It's annoying to have to wait another week (and keep downregging) but I guess the NHS has to build the possibility that you might not respond into their number crunching. . . .

Not looking forward to three needles rather than one though, does anybody have any tips for avoiding bruising or is it just pot luck as to whether you hit a blood vessel?

soosy · 24/04/2008 20:09

NoMore you may not have any side effects but I remember feeling really flat, no hot flushes, like taking clomid though!

Sooty, why three needles? Avoid bruising, do the injections where you can see! Your tummy below your tummy button is quite a good area as there is some fat there!

Good Luck girls.

nomoremagnolia · 25/04/2008 08:58

On Clomid I was just loads more emotional - unable to hold back tears over even the most little/stupid things (you know when you can usually stop yourself...) and more snappy/short tempered than usual rather than having any physical symptoms. Though for downregging I'd kind of like to have symptoms to show it's working - a bit like morning sickness I guess, at least you know your body is reacting to the hormones which reassures you that the hormones are there (or not in the case of DRing)

sootykalucy · 25/04/2008 10:00

Hi Soosy,

I have been told to split the menopur dose - one on each leg, and then also keep up the suprefact (at a lower dose) . . . hence the three needles . . . I guess they have their reasons but I wish they would explain why. . . my nurses are recommending the thighs not the stomach???

And Clomid should come with a health warning - YOU WILL FEEL SUICIDAL! Did anyone read about Helena Bonham-Carter saying she had a terrible experience on Clomid? I think it is handed out way too liberally, I would rather have skipped that episode entirely . . . and I would recommend people not to bother unless they are doing IUI as it dried me up completely.

Sorry to hear you are naseaus nomore, have you tried ginger tea? I find just inhaling it helps.

sootykalucy · 25/04/2008 10:06

sorry nomore I didn't read your message well enough, I thought you were having symptoms, not wanting the reassurance of them. If it helps - I didn't really have any but when I went in for my scan/blood tests the Dr's said my body had responded well to the hormones and they'd done the job . . .

soosy · 25/04/2008 21:35

I am with you Sooty about clomid, I just got hot flushes and a longer cycle! (with 3 follicles instead of the usual one)!!!! I have to tell you I think clomid is worse than IVF and you are right to want to miss that episode. I don't understand about splitting the dose or the thighs, as your ovaries are in your lower abdomen. I have always had a really good response injecting into my tummy and in one place. Read the leaflet that comes with the menopur - it would interesting to know what the manufacturer says! BTW ask the nurses, perhaps it is just to keep you occupied.

Nomore you probably won't have any symptoms and you won't know until you have a scan if they are working, but they are working. Don't worry about that.

sootykalucy · 27/04/2008 19:28

Good point about reading the leaflet - I will study it tonight. Yeah, I did ask the nurses - but my 'teach' wasn't with one of the smart ones.

Has anyone noticed worse symptoms around 'ovulation' time? I have had a hell few days - bad headaches and feeling really tired - but I also noticed a few ovulation symptoms. I am wondering if my body is just fighting it harder at this time? Hopefully, cause I have a hell deadline next week and at this rate I will be wanting to sleep through it!

Good luck for the week all . . . .sootyk.

soosy · 28/04/2008 19:24

Its probably that your ovaries are really working overtime that you feel grotty. Remember to drink plenty of water, follicles are full of water, so the headaches may be because you are slightly dehydrated. Good Luck.

I am glad I cancelled my FET as I have had stress unknown this last week, the buyer of our house is prevaricating, we were supposed to exchange two weeks ago and today, neither of which have happened, we have another buyer in the wings but I am finding it hard to keep calm. Also DS is v unwell with tummy bug, which of course I shall catch, so a good thing i am not have embryos put back.

Good Luck Sooty

sootykalucy · 28/04/2008 20:45

Ta soosy, am actually feeling much better today so god knows what is up. How are you feeling nomore? Any symptoms yet?

And just a general question, does anyone else think about adoption when they are doing this?

nomoremagnolia · 28/04/2008 20:54

Have been mega emotional today - just like I was on the Clomid Have cired twice today and have almost cried a few more times. In a way I'm glad to get some symptoms, though I think DH wishes I wasn't!! Am also feeling really low today, am thinking of getting signed off for a bit if it doesn't go away and if GP agrees - what do you think, should I give it my all in this sense or should I try and keep life as 'normal' as possible?

nomoremagnolia · 28/04/2008 20:55

cired = cried

sootykalucy · 29/04/2008 09:23

Hi nomore,

Really sorry to hear you are reacting so badly, from what I have heard people do get really different reactions. I know a woman who went through ten cycles before success in a very business like way, and another who did one, failed, but felt so miserable the whole time she never tried again.

I would keep on for a few more days. I had a really bad time on thurs/fri/sat - headaches and overwhelming tiredness, but it seems to have lifted since Sunday night. I guess I am suggesting it may get better.

If you do go off - have you thought of 'natural IVF'? My sister is doing this - it involves very minimal drugs and is getting good success rates. I am going to move to it when I have used my NHS cycles (if I am not lucky ofcourse).

I'd hang in there for a bit longer, but remember there are other options.

nomoremagnolia · 29/04/2008 10:25

I just feel so down and tired I have been having headaches, but headaches alone wouldn't normally stop me. Think I will sit it out for a few days and see if it gets better or worse. Not helped by the fact that there are lots of other stressful things happening in mine and DH's lives at the moment as well as the IVF...I know it'll all be worth it in the end though

sootykalucy · 29/04/2008 10:41

Don't be afraid of the paracetamol!

nomoremagnolia · 29/04/2008 11:15

It doesn't seem to help with the headaches though I'm getting a bit hooked on 4head - it helps a bit (temporarily at least)

soosy · 29/04/2008 20:36

Yes, we did think about adoption, until one person told me that at the age of 32 and DH 38 we were too old to adopt a child under three in this country. We would have to go abroad. I have thought about it vaguely since DS as well but it's not so easy as we have to spend time abroad waiting for it all to go through and I am not sure that it is fair on DS.

I cried the whole way through my first cycle of IVF, it wasn't not only the drugs it's the was the final realisation that conceiving was going to be tough and the not knowing what is going to happen. You feel v vulnerable. My advice have a glass of red wine. headaches I'm not so good at!

nomoremagnolia · 30/04/2008 07:51

You're spot on there soosy about the "final realisation that conceiving was going to be tough and the not knowing what is going to happen" I think also (without sounding too over dramatic I hope) that there's also an element of grieving for your body not being able to do what it's meant to. One of the things someone said to me on Mon that made me cry was that we just needed a bit of help and I snapped that it was more than just a bit - my body was crap and I was useless!
I really didn't realise quite what a nightmare rollercoaster I'd got onto with the IVF - I was just relieved when the gynae said he'd refer us that something was going to happen (I was worried he'd say keep trying naturally)

sootykalucy · 30/04/2008 10:00

Morning all, hope you are feeling better nomore. I agree with what you are saying with IVF and the realisation that it isn't going to happen naturally. I had four rounds of IUI previously and I think that helped prepare me. My doctor says it is best to look at IVF as a 4-6 cycle treatment (if you can afford it) because the statistics hold for that long - ie a equal chance for each cycle. I am trying to think about it as a long haul rather than a cycle by cycle attempt. And Soosy, you have had a lot of cycles haven't you? At what point did you find it easier?

As for adoption, I can't help but think if I am successful I almost need to give something back. It weighs on me that I am going to such lengths and expense (or the NHS is at this stage) and yet there are still so many children out there that need looking after. I have found myself very aware of calls for adoption from overseas, or for older children and I wonder if this will pass. I guess it just seems like such an intervention and although I don't see it as selfish, it makes me question it all I guess. . .

nomoremagnolia · 30/04/2008 12:36

This has all come up on us very quickly (I know I shouldn't complain) - when the clomid didn't work the gynae said well we've done all we can here, it's time to refer you for ivf. I asked about iui but gynae said you'll only get nhs funding for 1 'go' whether that's ivf or iui and iui has the same sucess rate over 5 cycles as ivf has for one. That's a brief paraphrasing of what he said but we saw him end of Jan when clomid hadn't worked and ivf hospital were contacting us by the middle of Feb to sort out baseline scan/blood tests etc. Can't help but feel we've been swept along in a tidal wave without any warning! It's only now that the hugeness of this has really hit me.

nomoremagnolia · 30/04/2008 12:38

Hi sootyk I would like to think of it as a 4-6 cycle treatment but this is the only one the NHS are paying for so I want it to be this one! We can afford more but it will take us time to save the £££ (hopefully we'll get some to freeze so it'll be cheaper)

sootykalucy · 30/04/2008 13:22

Hi nomore, sounds like you haven't done so well from your primary care trust as we have - the old NHS lottery - it makes me very grateful. The money is still a big issue though, we have put off buying a house because we have decided to make our deposit available for IVF if we need it, fingers crossed neither of us will, but I do feel like you are putting a lot of pressure on yourself to succeed first time round.

Hang in there, my symptoms have really gotten a lot better in the last few days, I have no idea why but I am not complaining!

soosy · 30/04/2008 21:45

It doesn't really get any easier emotionally, well not until I had DS. Now I just look at him and realise how lucky I am to have him, but I still worry about him not having a sibling (main motivation for having no2, as I now feel I have been pg and given birth) but I know talking to only children that I am probably worrying for no reason. But my last cycle failure hit me hard we had a perfect score two grade one eight cell embryos, not bad for a babe hitting forty next year, and four to freeze. Physically it is never fun.

I am sorry I can't be more optimistic, you just learn to cope with it better and hiding your misery. Girl friends are a blessing, including those who have children. But girls I have complete faith in both of you, statistically you have to both get PG and it will happen.

nomoremagnolia · 01/05/2008 09:51

I think DH and I are putting a lot of pressure on ourselves - I keep saying the chances of it not working are higher than it working, but I don't believe myself! I expect to crash completely if this doesn't work, though we hope to have the embryos and the money to do a couple of frozen cycles later this year. Am worrying myself sick about so much of this - I think the headaches are partly stress as well as a side-effect of the drugs.
RE NHS: though we only get one go I am impressed at how quickly it's all happened, I was really expecting to be told we'd have to join the back of a long waiting list for the ivf.

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