🎄Is your turkey 🦃moister than an oyster?💦TTC bus 51

[Minster2012]

Wow that last bus was an amazing bumper BFP filled bus where we were all crying and screaming for joy as lots of our lovely passengers got their BFPs…🙌🏻we are having an ADVENT CALENDAR of a BFP each day! 🥰❤️

There’s still some ppl lingering on this bus so that’s it, I’m calling time, all the rest of you are due off this bus with your 2 lines please 🤞🏻

This is the bus where we’ve got lots of things going on, bumps, rainbows 🌈, ivf, and now lots more miracle BFPs before ivf! Maybe we should issue passengers with an ivf referral on your way in too to help spur those eggs & sperm into action!

Whether you are TTC “normally”, IUI/ivf or anything we are a crew that cling together to the bitter end & always ready to help a sister out. We’ve had multiples, some losses so know two lines can be just as terrifying as none, and we’ve got ladies where those two lines are more illusive than a white Christmas 🎅🏻

It costs an embarrassing story for your ticket, doesn’t have to be TTC related as we know laughing when TTC is needed.

If you see mention of Instagram I have a public account where a lot of people are linked too:
Minstermusings, and a few people have created new anonymous accounts to record their TTC journey/life stupidities m/general annoyances on…just don’t mention TTC on a personal account.

Happy Boxing Day ladies, hope you all had a good Christmas 🎅🏼

@larrythelizard @Franklydear snap on the contraception front. It wasn't until coming off it over 2 years ago I realised how much it made me have mood swings, low mood in particular and lower libido too, I don't think I'd ever go back on it

@bez91 @Franklydear @larrythelizard I too won't be going bk on contraception after this baby is born. We always wanted two so I'd love to have an "oops we weren't even actively trying moment" but it's doubtful with my low amh and endo history, plus he's had sperm issues before, so it'll be interesting to see what happens... Hope you've all had a lovely boxing day and still have more days off to come 😊

@Franklydear I’ve just turned 44 now too, so if this one doesn’t stick I’ll try my last two Frosties then I’m done. Sometimes I think it helps to have a set cut off point.

Morning ladies, it's interesting about the contraception isn't it, I think a lot of ppl feel similar & don't go back on it after being off, I'm not sure. I was on drop & it stopped my periods which was great & I didn't feel much different other than that. I've had a coil before for 6 weeks & was bleeding the entire time & in pain. On the other hand I HATE periods, being on depo for years isn't great. There won't be any more children here if this goes well, we just can't go through the heartache or afford it really so I guess it's the snip & me dealing with periods🤷🏼‍♀️

@Franklydear hugs for you talking & thinking/deciding

@Franklydear @bez91 @larrythelizard @Minster2012 Another one here that would never go back on hormonal contraception. I was on the pill, depo injection and mini pill from being 15 (not all together 🤣) and I didn't know what normal was. I came off way before ttc but I was worried as in the past I had really bad period pain. Omg it was like a new lease of life. I didn't know what a sex drive was until 2018! Most of my life has been ruined! And I used to struggle sometimes with hot feet in the night and could never sleep. Whether it also contributed to my infertility I've no idea.
I'm not sure what we'd do though. Can't see DH having the snip and sterilisation seems extreme. We previously just used condoms but it's not as good as without. And they aren't cheap! I've just asked him actually and he was like- why do we need to use anything? Its never resulted in anything before! 🤣

I don't know where I stand on contraception 😬 periods were definitely more manageable when on the pill but it definitely affected my mood too so pros and cons to being on or off it. @paintfairy also with your OH on is there really any need? Depends on how you would feel about an unexpected bfp I suppose. @franklydear sorry you are having a hard time and making hard decisions. We've also played the moving goalposts game and it's not easy. You keep thinking a little longer but the dynamics are changing all the time.

@Manifestingbaby whilst I'm not sure we'd (i say we, I have no idea what he'd say) be totally against a 2nd one turning up unplanned, no way can we afford childcare. So if it happened within a year or so we'd be up shit creek! 🤣🤣

Not sure what I’d say if they tried to have a conversation about contraception with me - it’s nearly 4 years since I last had sex as it is! 🤦‍♀️

@sunbird24 safe enough so! Do you get sick listening to our dtd ramblings? 🙈 par for the course though I suppose in a ttc group.

@paintfairy ya the practicalities are a whole different story aren't they. Childcare definitely a big one. And much as a surprise bfp sounds fab I dont think I'd like to end up pg quickly and put my body through it all again quickly (if I were pregnant to begin with, getting ahead of myself!)

@Manifestingbaby not at all, you’re all so funny with the way you talk about it! I do have vague memories of quite enjoying it sometimes but mostly I don’t miss it really. I think it’s probably a bit less stress to just go to the clinic a few days after you ovulate for them to transfer an embryo, but also a lot less fun I expect…

@Sunbird24 tell me to piss off if you'd like but do you miss sex? Is it just because you are single (then obviously wanting a baby I can totally get that) I think I'd really miss sex. The 2 major times in my life I've been single (& not ill) I've had a friend with benefits cos I love sex 😜 but that was all whilst on the depo injection so not sure it caused the lower libido ppl talk about like @paintfairy (I think you'd find a way to afford childcare, so I'm also with the others on don't bother with contraception) 2 ladies from our ivf thread back in 2017 (who had nhs ivf in 2917 & it worked) have had their second child this year naturally. It's funny as I had a conversation with @blackcurrantqueen when I had my first natural BFP this year & she said "you may need to be careful in the future as you aren't as infertile as you thought" it's a bizarre thought

No, I miss cuddles, but not sex, or even kissing! (I really don’t like things in my mouth which aren’t either edible or a toothbrush…) I’m sure I used to enjoy it when I was younger and in a relationship (although I do have memories of getting super frustrated with my ex cos he just kept fucking stroking me when I’d told him I needed something a bit more spontaneous and exciting, like right now - he had form for generally not listening to me though, that’s why he’s an ex!) Maybe if I meet someone nice in the future I’ll be into it again, but for now I’m perfectly fine without. 🤷🏻‍♀️

@Sunbird24 I have sensory issues, I don't like kissing and sex has to be on my terms, but I have a wonderful understanding partner that doesn't make me uneasy at all, so it is enjoyable, I was for ever on the minipill without breaks, or periods and eventually that made my libido off, and it dulled everything, the hormonal feelings coming out of it were extravagant, but I got used to them

Just stroking oh god @Sunbird24 that sounds awful 😂no wonder he's an ex that would piss me off so much!

We really aren't painting a good picture of hormonal contraceptives are we?!

I must be the exception, I can't wait to get my implant put back in!
15 years on hormonal contraceptives.. The only difference I can see now is that I want to cry all the time and I'm getting really bad headaches. Maybe I need to give it longer to see any benefits. Still no periods so maybe my body just needs more time to settle and I'll feel like a new woman!

I feel like you if I go ages without sex @Sunbird24 - I don't think I have that high a libido - but also like you @bez91 that is exacerbated by hormonal contraceptives.

We'll probably go back to condoms for a while but actually use them at the vital points in the month!

I’ve seen the stretch between Christmas and New year referred to as the ‘merryneum’ today - made me chuckle, thought you lot might appreciate it too!

@Sunbird24 😂😂😂😂love that!!

@larrythelizard actually withdraw at the right time 😂😂😂

@dmb91 we await your "new woman moment" when it kicks in 🤪

So random one but was talking to a friend who described what her mate is having to do before her Roman Catholic wedding...anyone get married in a Roman Catholic Church & can confirm this?? Her friend & OH have to do several "courses" before their wedding, & she's just got an email from the person conducting the wedding asking her to book in with him to discuss "fertility management"
As in how to have sex & not get pregnant until you want (they imagine) does this actually happen?? Maybe we all got the outtakes & took them wrong? Do you think she'll get told when he needs to pull out? @larrythelizard you should have taken note 😂 apparently this friend doesn't like talking bout sex anyway so how bout with a stranger telling you what to do...all to just get married in this one specific church. Bonkers

@sunbird24 I think when you dont have it you don't miss it. Ive been with my OH forever but survived dry spells when I was single without being too bothered 🤣 I think like you I'd miss affection more.

@dmb91 I'm 50/50 on whether I like the pill. I remember when I came off it thinking this is great I feel much more lively and positive but then thst only last until pms and periods which are kinda shit so maybe being a bit more on an even keel with the pill is better?

Catholic Sunday school teacher here @Minster2012, you do take courses, they are about the sanctity of marriage as the union of the souls, the fertility management is basically contraception not allowed, you have as many kids as god send you( for those who don’t cheat, gods sends you one every year, I know families with 11-15 kids, remember we marry young) the way to not have kids until you want is abstinence, sex is to procreate not for your enjoyment, tell her not to fret, there’ll be a lot of judgement but by little detail, in a nutshell, don’t.

I’ve never been single since late teens, so I don’t know if I’ve missed it

Oh I remember, many years ago when my friend was preparing to get married a few months before me(we announce weddings at least a year I advance, so people know you weren't pregnant at that point, the shame) I had to go to assure the priest that they were a holy couple for the long term, not silly buggers, cos the silly buggers got pregnant about 3 months before the wedding, and the priest was foaming at the mouth, he did marry them and so they still are, she's an only too, must be about 25 now...

@larrythelizard I don't know if I could ever use that as a reliable form of contraception, I'd probably get my dates wrong and despite 2 years of TTC would end up with a whooops 🤦🏼‍♀️😆

I wish my brothers girlfriend would have attended one of these courses @Franklydear @Minster2012 😅 she claims to be a dedicated catholic yet has 2 children by 2 different men (none of which are my brothers, not married to any of them) and doesn't have custody of one of them, also doesn't see the kid which speaks volumes. I think I've mentioned before on here I despise the woman. She makes me sick that she appears to use religion as an excuse for claiming she's a good person - she's not.

Anyone got any exciting plans up to the New Year? None here, back to work tomorrow so house sorting today and a meal NYE after work. I'm the person who cannot wait until 12th night to get the Christmas decs down 😆

Saying she'd a good person with religion @bez91? Nope that's not gravy, and she's clearly not a good Roman Catholic other than the shagging 🤭

@Franklydear so they allowed them to get married? I guess it was gods way, are you saying your friends have been together for 25 years or got 25 kids? 11-15 kids dear me. 🙄😳abstinence it is then 😋

@Manifestingbaby I think you raise a good pint on the even keel on the pill

We are going to our friends for NY, there will be a number of us there with kids too so they'll just run riot then the plan is for all the kids to collapse together in one room to sleep. Bearing in mind diff ages & sleeping abilities it should be carnage! I just need to go in & bagsy our room with an actual bed in it!

@bez91 if she’s catholic, she would have attended Sunday school, it’s drummed into us that is your actions towards those who need you or aren’t nice to you that determine if you’re a good person, charity is not to look good and not restricted to the food bank, and with that record she’s not even a good catholic, ask her if she was confirmed or only baptised, see if she knows what you’re on about, I hate people who use religion as an excuse, if you want to piss her off you can remind her that Pope john Paul II said that heaven is just your actions on earth, and hell a terrible life style, ... for nye, we have a bottle of Prosecco

@Minster2012 yes, they were allowed to marry but it wasn’t without a lot of convincing, pater wasn’t happy to officiate with a pregnant bride,
They only have that one baby, but others, specially those that belong to Opus Dei (like an extreme section) have many, one of my school friend parents married at 20, so she was one of 14, and another was one of 8 but parents married in their 30s, my uncle joined Opus Dei after they were done having kids, 3, tried to recruit me, fuck that for a game of soldiers!

@Manifestingbaby I see what you mean but the even keel is quite low for me, I quite prefer the rollercoaster

Well ladies, we decided, dh is not done, he’s not asking for another year, but at least until March, so baby born within the year anyway, he’s not opposed to the snip but wants to wait until March to decide, I can see another extension coming my way 🙄 we are in agreement that hormonal contraception is out of the question, I don’t think I want to track anymore, just period dates.

@bez91 also, as I went to a convent school, we had lots of charity work to do, if we ever used that to justify ourselves mother superior or the priest would have our skin, nothing less catholic that singing your own praises