Hints, tips? Am I missing ovulation?

[PoleFairy]

Hi, first off, sorry this is so long. Not a soul knows im ttc (other than my husband) and I feel like I need someone to download to and maybe tell me im doing things right/wrong. I was trying to avoid getting too bogged down in the ttc threads but of course I've caved going into cycle 4 of ttc and feeling down hearted so asking for some reassurance or tips.

I came off the pill after 11 years in August. I thought it would take a looooong time to get my cycle back but downloaded the Ovia app and started tracking things anyway and did get ewcm on day13 and then after a 27 day cycle my period showed up, lasted 4 days and finished up neatly. The next cycle was 26 days and then this cycle just gone has been 26/27 days (started brown spotting yesterday am and by the late evening there was a little red blood so if I count yesterday as the first day it was a 26 day cycle. I know I'm really, really lucky this has happened after 11 years on the pill. This is the same as my period before starting the pill. Is a 26 day cycle ok?

Last month I tried ovulation tests (just the poundland ones) and on day 13 at lunchtime and evening they were very, very high and almost peak, then on day 14 in the morning they were high but not as high as day 13, so I missed my peak (maybe it was overnight? Is that possible?) I know they dont confirm ovulation but I'm hopeful as my cycle is regular that i am. I got ewcm on day 12 so we dtd day 12 and day 13 when I was almost peak but DH was away day 14 and 15 so I'm guessing I actually missed ov because the peak means I'll ovulate in the next 36 hours? When do you think I ovulate with a peak on day 13?

I'm 30, healthy BMI and quite active. Pre ttc I did pole fitness, yoga, weights and kettlebell HIITs weekly but I admit I've stopped the kettlebell HIITs since starting ttc because they just felt quite a lot. I dont know, I was worried I'd do some damage with the intense weight lifting but I know that's probably silly.

For the last 3 years I've taken vitamins C, D and E, Zinc, high strength omega 3 and iron everyday and 3 months before coming off the pill I added Folic Acid. I started Q10 yesterday as I read it improves egg quality.

I know I'm expecting too much and it will probably take a year to conceive but is there anything else I can do to help? Husband is in an active role (on his feet all day in construction) and cycles to and from work everyday but he is a little overweight (but generally always has been, hes built like a rugby player if you know what I mean so I dont think it would be hugely easy to slim down).

Well done if you got to the end of my rambling, at least you've saved my DH from another night of my worried rambling.

Hey just wanted to say give it time! It's been what, 3 months? Straight off the pill at that. Sounds like you're ovulating just fine (could be any time from CD13-15, no one can guess for you unless you start tracking your basal body temperature) and I assume you have enough BD?

Give it another 3 months and then if you're still worried maybe get a private TTC MOT check up for you and OH? Remember it could just as easily be his swimmers so don't go crazy thinking it's all on you.

Thank you, yes I know I'm being silly and 3 months is nothing really. I havent done BBT and not sure I could as I suffer badly with insomnia and get up a lot in the night to go for a wee, I think I wouldnt get very accurate results.

BD was good the first 2 cycles (we were actually on our honeymoon during my fertile week the first cycle) but the last cycle not so good as DH went away on cycle day 14 for 4 nights and then I had the cold of doom thats going round so the 2nd half of my cycle BDing was basically non existent.

@PoleFairy tbh I wouldn't recommend BBT to you as you seem to have a really regular cycle and do OPKs as well. Just carry on with what you're doing and you should get pregnant in no time. Remember there's only like a 20% chance per cycle anyway!

Give it time. I know that's not what you want to hear but it'll happen when the time is right and there's absolutely nothing that truly "works". Trust me I tried everything.

Before I was ttc my daughter, a friend told me it took her two years to conceive and her and her dh were totally fine fertility wise. I said, no well I can't wait that long.

It was 27 months between me starting to ttc and giving birth.

I never got on well with standard OPK’s, never got a positive but I did fall with my first third month. (Had been off the pill for 10 months). This time I wanted to get pregnant straight away so used the Clearblue Advanced Ovulation sticks. They look at two hormones instead and you only need to test with your longest overnight wee once a day. We got pregnant second month this time and I really think it was down to them. They may be good for you as your cycles may still be settling. Good luck!

You can't really go wrong with having sex every other day during that fertile window. So if you're regular and using ovulation sticks then maybe every other day from day 9? So maybe day 9/11/13/15/17.
Depending on both of your libidos doing it every other night gives sperm time to regenerate, it can live for up to 7 days internally anyway and your safest best is having sperm waiting for the egg. Sometimes waiting for just the peak May mean sperm are still swimming up and the egg is coming out and you miss optimum meeting

Hadnt really thought of it taking a while for them to swim up @1940s, you might be right there. Last month we did every other day up to cd13 so this month I will try from CD 9 until 15 like you suggest. It's just finding the time, which is terrible really isnt it.

I always wonder if that's true for them living up to 7 days, don't they just sort of fall out?

I think up to 7 days is the far end of the scale. But 3-4 days is very 'achievable!' And they don't necessarily fall out, the 'fluid' leaves your body but the sperm live inside you.

Every other day helped take the pressure off for us. It became a chore doing it every night!

3-4 days for sure OP. You're most likely to conceive in the three days coming up to ovulation as the egg only really lives around 12 h so it's best if swimmers are already waiting for it.

And no they don't fall out - your cervix don't just let womb content fall out willy nilly

Ok, will just keep going and hope for the best. I would say having looked at my app we have always BD in the 2 or 3 days leading up to ovulation and my concern was that we hadnt on actual ovulation day. I will make sure this month we keep going way past my surge on an opk though as we failed at that last month and then we might hit the day too. Will also aim for every other day as we are more like every 3/4 days in the month and then 1/2 days on fertile week.

The other thing I did think is that we use lube occasionally and have been using a water based one but I dont think they are very fertility friendly.

There are two fertility friendly lubes, preseed and conceive plus (maybe there's others but those are the big brands)