December 07- MC Avengers in big pants, going through, been through or pg after a mc, still here, still eating cakes. We will not be beaten!

[aquababe]

Hope the titles ok

OK so I have a reasonably positive start to the new thread.
What I thought to be AF turned out to be a bad case of theruns
And so when I poas'ed last night I actually got a BFP

Very nervous about it, but happy too. I actually went to the place(shopping centre) I got the positive with my dd for good luck
My dh thinks I'm mad but hey don't they all
now if I can just get past the nine week stage without going insane

ALBS glad your finally able to admit your pregnant

Lissie glad your getting that referal at last
ilts sorry it didn't happen this time

back from scan.
seems I have a 7mm fibroid.
most of the clots seem to have come out
am now reading negative on pregnancy test

just looking up fibroids but seem to be contradicting themselves hospital doc said fibroids didn't cause miscarriage, but on internet it seems to think it's a possibility

had the male scanner, but I'm learning so wasn't too painful
doc was quite nice this time except she told me i got pregnant to soon. she advised I wait 3 months this time. which upset me as my dd will now be 3 before she gets any brothers and sisters.
my head knows I'm not but my heart feels like I'm letting her down. she's so baby crazy.

jules really hope today goes well and you can feel a little more relaxed

aquababe - so sorry to hear of your loss I know how sad you must feel when you so desperately want a sibling for your dd. My ds is going to be 4+ when I manage to have another baby and I feel so sad about that. He is very sociable and would love company Take good care of yourself and wish you lots of luck for when you try again xx

oh Aqua I am sorry
my dd will be 3 in June and we never planned on such a big gap, and not only just because of my age. it is difficult.
I would like to wait at least one normal cycle before ttc, but we will see I know I need to be ready both physically and mentally

aquababe Hope you are holding up OK.

jules - yes it is a full time job keeping up with all that is going on with everyone. I'm on holiday this week so have forgotten I have a full time job already - yuk !
I am OK - Feel a little better this week but have a new if somewhat trivial problem. I cannot stop shopping. Someone help me get some control.
I did do some xmas shopping today but also bought a new jacket and a lovely pair of black boots for myself.
Credit card has now melted.
sfxmum Bless your DH and his blind optimism. My DP is very positive and whilst it can be annoying sometimes I don't know what I would do without it.

aquababe - so sorry to hear about your results, I don't know about the waiting 3 months thing don't think I would personally (well I didn't but thats just me)

ladylush - sorry to hear about the TSH but glad you are getting treated and hopefully it will make ttc easier for you x

TS - I was waiting on the bleeding stopping to ttc again after the mc but I must have ovulated whilst still bleeding as the start of the main mc was 11th August and next AF was 7th September. I found it hard to believe my body was getting ready for another baby whilst still losing the first one but thats nature. Am so pleased for you with the BFP

jules - how you doing? hanging on in there I hope well lying on the sofa on in there I hope

sfxmum - we did puddle jumping on Wednesday what a mess but the DDs loved it, I blame Peppa Pig!

Not much to report here still feeling sick and knackered, big hellos to everyone else too xxx

Evening all (pops sounds like policeman )??

Back on sofa where I belong - only in solidarity for my main lady jules of course

teehee ANTM is Amheyricas next tap maaaadel baby! (said in accent of tyra bootylicious banks)

TJ you are soooooo nice - i would be listing Jo Malone bath oil or dyptique fig perfume or laura mercia blush prism or some marks and spencer red leather gloves (gotta match the hand bag) or a le cruset pan (omlete one!) or anything from red direct or a thick belt or some cahsmere tights (cashmere anything goes without saying)

teehee - you have a sister in shopping sin here

hope everyone has a fab weekend
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

TJuice, how did your appraisal go? I hate appraisals- never know what to say!!

Aquababe I'll second Sweetkitty's remarks...why wait. It's not like our system has to "order out" for a part that needs replacing. I didn't wait. I did what came naturally. Do what you feel is best for you because every doctor is going to give you a different set of directions. So very sorry for your loss.

I've been reading all your posts. I have just had a mmc, after 11-week scan. Had ERPC on Wednesday and am just up and down like a yo-yo. I have a DD aged nearly 5 and so wanted her to have a sibling before she was 6. Had very early mc in Feb due to high temperature. Now this - maybe related to hypothyroidism but probably not. Just so so scared about how I might feel when TTC - am 38 at Christmas - it suddenly feels as if I might only have an only child. My brother said today that maybe I should be grateful for what I have (!!!) nearly throttled him. How does everyone cope? DH is being amazing - but in an action-packed, coping sort of way - leaving me feeling like I'm a defective mother, wife, professional woman. How do you get back to be in control again, on top form when you just feel like crawling into a duvet and regressing to age 9 again!

CDD - so sorry for you - it will take time. I also had a mmc and found out at the 11 week scan, and a D&C. For the first 2 weeks after i was a mess. You will have all the pregnancy hormones going crazy in your body. My advice - allow yourself to crawl under the duvet for a bit - perhaps with some alcohol and chocolate.

Take care

CCD I've found I'm not quite the norm BUT I was not horribly crushed by my MC. It was a loss but it wasn't the end. Life moves on and I chose to move with it. Plus I figured it would be easier to get some BDing action if I weren't all weepy. To me baby making is a joy, an adventure. Sometimes adventures have detours but that doesn't mean you call it quits. Think of all those people climbing Mt. Everest (insert mountain of choice), if they break a leg they sure as hell don't sit around mid mountain and cry about it. They move on...maybe up or maybe down...but they do something. So that's a snapshot of my philosophy and how I moved beyond my loss. For me it paid off with a another BFP exactly 28 days later. Just embrace how you feel right now whether it be good or bad. Then take that emotion and do something productive with it. This is your fork in the road...........

CDD I am sorry for your loss, I feel hormones do their worst within a couple of weeks or so and the first AF always leaves me with mixed feeling. I think it is useful and healthy to acknowledge whatever feeling you may have, ask for support when needed and make sure you do things you find help.
I also think that getting back to some sort of routine is helpful eventually it all helps.
the loss stays with you but like most grief it is eased by time
take care

CDD - I can sympathise with you, I had my miscarriage this week, whilst I feel like you do I am trying to do what TS says and carrying on. I feel like crap and want to lose myself for a bit but that will not help DD or DH who is just keeping himself busy. My DD is also 5 and I wanted another ASAP but the main thing is that you stay healthy and continue. Christmas will be here soon and whilst it is sad what we have lost it is also important to acknowledge what we have.

My mum has this week been found to have something behind her eye and is awaiting an urgent appointment with a neuro-surgeon life feels so negative at the moment. 'stop the world and let me get off'

I hope everyone else is OK did not want to post as trying to stay in the background but can particularly respond to what CDD and TS is saying.

Coolkat i hope your mum is ok x

cd sorry that you've had another mc.
I'm currently having my second one (first was in sept)and having learnt from the first have not yet told those who said slightly crap things (except mil) as I just feel I want to hide away and protect myself a little longer.

I know I am so very lucky to have my dd as a couple of my friends have mc'd and don't have children yet (i've always felt a little guilty) and I focus on her to get me through the bad days.

cut yourself some slack though it's all so raw still. give yourself time to grieve. I'm sure we'll both be cuddling little bundles soon enough.

incidently not sure about waiting 3 months but I'm definitely giving christmas to myself this year

Coolkat neuro sounds so scary but things could turn out not-so-bad. I can say that will the utmost confidence because my niece was rushed to ER just days ago and then off to neuro with a diagnosis that is easy to live with. Best wishes to your mother.

Oh and men just deal with it very differently. last time my dh at least cried this time nothing.
he's says maybe it'll hit him later.
though I doubt it. men don't have to deal with the physicality of it all so they can afford to look like superheroes.

and your not defective anything cos if you are so are the rest of us

oh and wine and cakes help

CCD - As you can tell everyone is different. I veered from trying to carry on as normal and then hiding away. Both helped at certain times and didn't at others. Found/Find it goes in stages. One day you think you are over the worst and the next you feel rubbish again. My DP was the sames yours, we don't have DC but he was cooking, shopping, washing etc. Let yourself lean on him even if it is just for practical stuff. Your body and hormones are not right as well.

I suppose my overwhelming message is go with what you need and if that is hiding under the duvet and regressing to a 9 yr old - do it. Listen to yourself.

ccd - i'm sorry to hear your news. Try to take it easy, be kind to yourself, and give it some time. The first few weeks are hard, and I found the first af made me very sad, and generally it's all about ups and downs.

TS - every considered a career in motivational speaking - v ulifting!

Aqua - i think the 3 month thing is the official line from doctors, but I can't see that there's really any sound reason for that. Go woth your own feelings, I'd say.

Verso - this thread is for anyone who's been through the mc experience - you don't have to be ttc, so stay with us, you're very welcome just to lounge around here and munch on cakes, or ice cream, or wine etc.

Ladylush - well hopefully the thyroid problem is the key to your wait for a bfp, and now they're getting it under control, fingers crossed things happen for you.

We've been doing lots of puddle sploshing, but the main thrilling adventure this week has been lift riding and the accompanying button pushing whenever we've gone into town. I never knew there were so many lifts....

CCD - so sorry for your loss. Do you have diagnosed hypothyroidism? I have read a LOT of research relating to the condition and it's impact on pregnancy and conception so if you need any links let me know

CCD so sorry to hear of your loss. As you see, everyone copes (or tries to ) a little differently, but one thing I'm sure everyone here would agree on is that this thread is a lifeline. I certainly find it much easier to 'get on with it' (and not to keep wanting to talk about what happened to inappropriate people...) by knowing that everyone is here, and that I'd only need to shout if I wasn't coping and messages of advice and support would come flooding in, just as they have for you. Bottom line is, it's a really sh*t thing to happen, no matter what your circumstances. You just have to do whatever works for you, be that concentrating on the future or hiding away for a little while - or maybe a bit of both. For a while I found nothing really helped, unfortunately shopping now seems to have regained a little of its former allure...! Thinking of you xx

Coolcat best wishes to your mum, and to you.

I second Kate...MN is a lifeline!!

This thread especially!!