December 07- MC Avengers in big pants, going through, been through or pg after a mc, still here, still eating cakes. We will not be beaten!

[aquababe]

Hope the titles ok

OK so I have a reasonably positive start to the new thread.
What I thought to be AF turned out to be a bad case of theruns
And so when I poas'ed last night I actually got a BFP

Very nervous about it, but happy too. I actually went to the place(shopping centre) I got the positive with my dd for good luck
My dh thinks I'm mad but hey don't they all
now if I can just get past the nine week stage without going insane

ALBS glad your finally able to admit your pregnant

Lissie glad your getting that referal at last
ilts sorry it didn't happen this time

I don't want to be disrespective to those having a tough go right now but I really need to post that I just got a very faint, kinda shadowy, BFP and I'm kinda in shock (happy shock but scared).

disrespectful not disrespective (is that even a word)

Agree with the insensitive comments my Mother said "maybe it was for the best as 3 children would be expensive" someone else said "maybe it was a boy and you can't carry boys"

All in all I think everyone has forgotten all about it, it's as if now I am pregnant again well I must be fine the baby has been replaced but sadly it doesn't work like that. I think this baby is only going to be here as it's brother or sister died and I still think about the mc every day, the scars have healed a bit but they are still there.

And if one more f person asks me if I want a boy I will scream!!!! Sorry

Twilight that is great wishing you luck

called my aunt today as she was having a rough time, she then told me 'you shouldn't dwell on what happened to you, you know you are like that anyway'I promised to call back but the will fails

Yay Twilight!!!! That is THE BEST news!!! On a selfish level that really gives me hope as I think we had ERPCs within about a day of each other? Mine was 3rd Nov... And if you can get pregnant again so soon then maybe I can too, I know it doesn't work like that but even so... How many days past OV do you think you are?

Teeheelaydee Thank you! It really helps so much to know you're all out there, floating in the ether somewhere with a big tub of B&J!

Really feel for you sk. I really hope this isn't the wrong thing to say but I was talking to a friend who had a mmc about 3mths before she got pregnant with her DD. She said that while she's still sad about her lost little one, if that hadn't happened Ellie would never have existed which she finds impossible to even imagine... As I said, please forgive me if that sounds remotely like the sort of thing my or anyone else's MIL would say!

thanks sfx and kate. kate my mc was officially 09Nov with last bits passing 11Nov. I'm using the 11th as my cycle start as the 12th my bleeding stopped completely. That makes me CD26 today. I had EWCM on CD13&14. BDed CD15-AM. Today "could be" 11DPO. I've had a weeks worth of rising temps (today's being the highest). I've never temped before. Cervix is so high it's out-a-reach and CM is watery. Deep down I know this could all be a result of residual hormones so I'm holding out just a little while before I allow excitement. I've phoned my doc to see if I can come by and get a baseline progesterone test which would give me comfort...if the numbers rise, of course.

CONGRATULATIONS TWILIGHT ***

Aqua - brandy will help - hope you are ok x

Jules - any news - thinking of you?

Kate & Sfxmum - i got an insensitive comment along the relax lines today - my friend said "dont worry about having another mc you get pregnant really easily" - umm yeah but i also need to be able to carry them

Sweetkitty - i know what you mean about the one you lost they cant be replaced

TJuice - how are you doing?

I went to the GP - who was amazingly reassuring (horrid male doctor was on holiday). I burst into tears as soon as i entered her office. She went through my symptoms in detail and did not feel there was any great cause for concern. Interestingly once she said that they disappeared (psychological or what!). She was understanding about how hard this was going to be for me and helped me make a plan for getting through the next 8 weeks (it was obvious what a wreck i was). Lovely midwife from when i had mc is going to visit me on Monday and then provide regular support. At present i am not going to have any medical intervention but EPU have said i can go in anytime for reassurance (i would have to be desperate). So i am going to try and take a day at a time and try and get on with life as much as possible. So if you see someone walking around with there fingers crossed - say hello it will be me!

Lcy That's great news. It's also good to know you've got the support you need if you require it. If only all doctors were like that! Hopefully you can relax (well, a bit at least) now.
Jules How are you doing?
Kate I had the same comment about the Pill from my gran the day after my mmc Then yesterday a friend "helpfully" said that she'd read that mc could be caused by excessive exercise... That had me Googling straight away but turns out there's no evidence to support that theory. I hardly think going to the gym 3x per week qualifies as "excessive exercise" anyway!
I think people open their mouths before engaging their brains sometimes - either that or they feel they have to say something in the circumstances whereas keeping their mouths shut would be a far better option!
Hope everybody else is OK.
CD20 here and no surge according to the OPKs - I've now run out so hopefully the regular bd'ing will do the trick

Oops, forgot to say "Congratulations" to Twilight! Fingers crossed for you...

Cricri - i did the OPKs everyday and didnt get a surge once - it obviously didnt pick it up because i am preggers so just keep bd'ing regularly x Good luck x

kate - no your not being insensitive at all, I think just now I am still at that worry stage and don't actually believe I am pregnant, I am sure next year once I have the baby and am totally in love with her/him I will feel differently. I once read this really interesting article that said that a mpther has all her babies souls around her at all times, sometimes the little body isn't strong enough so the soul goes back to being a soul and waits again for a body to fill IYSWIM? A lot of people believe that your next baby is the soul of the one you lost. I also had a lot of people ask me if I was going to ttc again or just leave it

TS - what kind of test did you do? Can you get a digital one in the next few days? I know where you are at you don't want to even THINK about being pregnant again, I will keep everything crossed for you xxx

Lcy - everything crossed for you too, am glad you got a nice doctor as well

cricri - regular BDing always a good way to go although not in my case, it seems less is more with us, I have got pregnant twice with one BD in a month, once was 3 times around ovulation and this time last time we did the deed was CD14 and I ovulate CD15. Maybe DP only has super strength girl swimmers. Best of luck anyway

jules - hope that bleeding has tailed off

aquababe - thinking of you too we are all here if you need us

Sweetkitty you are soooo very right. I don't want to believe I could be pregnant. That has no bearing on my desire to be, it's just hard to be excited having just gone through my mc. I didn't want the digital tests because I have this desire to SEE the line get darker each day. I bought a three pack so I'll be POAS for a few more days. My doc that saw me after the MC said the progesterone test would probably ease my fears as I would get to see real numbers increase over the first trimester. He's not phoned me back yet but I'm sure I'll be giving bloods to his staff in the morning. Things are so early yet that I could have AF arrive normally....which makes me feel stupid for testing. I tested for two reasons: #1 I really had "that feeling" and #2 I have my regular dental checkup Monday morning...they might need to do xrays as they do every so often and that could be a bad thing if I'm pregnant. This is just a bit more overwhelming than I had expected. I could bring myself to tell DH when he phoned earlier. He doesn't have a clue that I even thought I might be. My RL friend that came by to look over my test works in the medical field. She feels bad that she knows before DH but my thought is if it fails over the next few days I've saved him the worry. He'll be on vacation in two weeks. That will be a good time to break the news. DD will also be on vacation for a month so I'll be able to relax during the scariest part. Sweetkitty I'll probably be asking you loads of questions. Now if I can just start breathing normal again!!!

oops could should be couldn't...

twilight - congrats, lady! i am so chuffed for you . . . .

lcy - yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

so fab . . . .

TS - I had very faint line the day before AF was due but wouldn't even think about it, even though I did a control with water, CBD gave a BFP the day AF was due but the ebay cheapies were still really faint, it wasn't until a week after AF was due that the line started to darken up and a good two weeks before it was as dark as the control. I feel a bit better after the scan but I have said before I won't feel pregnant properly until I have a bump and the baby is kicking me.

Hi everyone. Haven't been around since the Nov 07 thread as been having a bit of a rough time with renovating our house and feeling rundown. Haven't been ttc since my m/c in October and feeling scared about trying again. Just found out my step sister is pregnant with her 2nd (our DSs are the same age and this baby will be born in the same month I would have had my baby) and couldn't help feeling sad and a bit cheated if that makes sense? Sorry to be a misog! Congrats to all the BFP-ers here. Hoping I'll feel better about things soon and be raring to go for ttc in Jan 08 :-)

Thanks TJuice.

LoveAngel {{hugs}} all in due time, my dear. We're hear for you the whole way.

Aqua - just wanted to say how sorry I am at your news. Can completely empathise with how you are feeling. Hope you get some time to just curl up and shut the world out and cry.

Jules - hope you're hanging in there and that your ass hasn't left the sofa.

Twilight - congrats. Fingers crossed for you. It is such an exciting time. Hope you can enjoy some of it. Although I know it's a complete roller coaster between fear and elation!

Kitty - people keep asking me same question. Not that I'm pg.But along the lines of, do you think you'll try for another one to see if you get a boy'. . Love my girls and wouldn't know what to do with a boy's bits .

Cricri - wow. You're a tramploining coach? That's so cool. Would LOVE to train to do that.

As for people and their insensitive comments. Grrrrr. Until you've been through something this life changing then you should be banned from commenting on it. This is especially relevant to idiotic doctors and nurses.

Just as a slight aside, DD1 (6 yrs old) too scared to watch all of The Golden Compass. it's a bit frightening and quite dark in places. We had to leave half way through.

Still no AF here. Know everyone else going through tough time and I'm just whining. But just desperately want to get body back to normal, have a period and then at least I know my bits are working. At the moment I haven't had period since Aug and I'm over- flowing with hormones. Feel like broken peice of equipment at the moment

LoveAngel that totally makes sense. Girl I work with is due 3 days before I would have been and right now I hate her. Of course I'm happy for her, and their baby wouldn't be our baby IYSWIM, but really tough even so...

On the subject of people saying insensitive things, forgot to mention the worst one I've had which (I think) is so awful I hope it may make you all smile. Told a "friend" that my boobs which were pretty tiny before I got pregnant haven't returned to their normal size post mc, she told me to look on the bright side, how lucky I am to have had the benefit of being pregnant without having to ruin them by breastfeeding!!! Couldn't believe it - is it just me or is that totally astonishing?!?

SK I hadn't heard that theory before but I love it, totally gave me goose bumps, thank you. I hope it brings you some peace.

Keeping everything crossed for all the bfp-ers, really hoping to join you soon!

Evening ladies sitting on sofa with my fur baby watching ANTM with a bowl of crisps and a chocolate mousse to follow BLISS
I really look forward to reading the posts - some make me laugh out loud, others make me cry - . I hate the fact that we all have to be here - so much pain and suffering!

For anyone new to the MC game I can sa things do get better but I am now ping my pants at thought of getting PG again (i should be so lucky) and at thought of going into that scan room - I really think I would shatter into a million pieces if it happened again SFXMum your story really touced me as it took me back to that moment - i call it the sliding doors moment - when your lifechanges monumentally one way or the other and some faceless medic says "it doesn't look good I'm afraid ughhh even writing those words makes me feel ill

Hey nh I know what you have been through to get here and I can imagine it is really just another hurdle in a crappy year - but your pics are so fab and you are going to be super duper mum!

We should start a wall of shame for all of the insensitive comments we have endured - am sure most of them will come from MILs or maybe DH buying me Tena pads by mistake after the ERPC (never let him forget that one - gotta see the funny side eh?)

gilly I had the tests and scans back in the summer - might go see doc after xmas - will have started new job, had a boozy xmas and been on fab hols so a new start to the new year (I am scared in case it works and in case it doesn't work IYKWIM?)

Jules how are you doing?
acqua hope you're okay?
Congratumalations twighlightmummytobe

lady with long cycles (forgotten your name but don't want to go back a page cos I'll lose this message) nh101 had relly really long cycles after MC but went on clomid and got PG first time...there is hope

Has the bleeding stopped Jules?

I'm off to bed now - i hope you are ok x