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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

TTC 4 months going on 5...

15 replies

SEpoppet · 14/12/2020 15:56

Hi all, new to this but feel I need some support from others going through the same thing. Been TTC for 4 months, can feel AF coming on this month so think I'm out. Feel like I'm going slightly bonkers, all my pals are pg or have just had babies so don't feel I can turn to them...anyone going through the same thing and want to buddy up and look after each other?? Hubby is great but don't want to dump on him all the time as he is being so positive xxx

OP posts:
wildraisins · 14/12/2020 16:22

We've been trying for 3 cycles and just had AF come along again which was disappointing.

It's really hard not to think the worst and worry that maybe there's something wrong, even though I know it takes most people a while!

My partner is in his 40's so always feel like time is running out and I think each month we don't conceive is going to get more and more difficult emotionally - it's very stressful. If we knew it could take so long I think we would have started much earlier!

Original poster
SEpoppet · 14/12/2020 17:01

I hear you! How old are you? I've heard it is more to do with the woman's age than the man's - on NHS website it implies that anyway. Have you thought about a sperm analysis if you're worried about him? Think we might go down that route next month...cba now with xmas coming up. At least we will be able to have a drink!

People do say it takes a while but everyone I know seems to have conceived in a heartbeat! X

OP posts:
lizwells2020 · 09/02/2021 15:55

Hello-I'm in simillar situation - TTC 4 months and AF due tomorrow.BFN on sensitive test today so looks like it's on to month 5.
I know it can take up to a year but reading some of the fertility research it really usually happens in under 40s by month 3/4.
All my close friends and colleagues got pregnant month 1 or 2 so its really hard not to feel disappointed and worried.

We actually got DHs sperm tested and all good. Im 32 he's 35. Don'twant to put my worries on to him and make trying a stressful thing for him too.

glow92 · 09/02/2021 16:04

Hello 🙂, we're cycle 3 which I know is barely anytime at all really but it's become far too consuming, definitely compounded by lockdown... I'm so anxious there'll be something wrong, people make it seem so easy don't they.

Original poster
SEpoppet · 09/02/2021 16:21

Hey @lizwells2020 and @glow92 - this is really weird, I posted this a couple of months ago and got my BFP today!! 6th cycle of trying. I honestly felt like I wasnt pregnant and was on the verge of giving up but got a line at 10dpo. Who knows whether it will stick as it is early days! I know it feels really unfair that it is taking so long but keep going. This month I had sex every other day until 3 days before ov, then did it every day until the day after ov (5 days). I also used a little bit of preseed and for the first time a ferti lilly cup. I really think that must have made the difference and all the sex as in previous months we have done it every other day only. Best of luck, both

OP posts:
lizwells2020 · 09/02/2021 16:28

@SEpoppet CONGRATULATIONS!!! So happy for you and so encouraging to hear your good news.

I’ve actually bought pressed to try for this month as I don’t ever get EWCM so who knows if that’s contributing. So good to hear maybe it’s worked for you.

Sorry - do you mean you put it in a lily cup?! I thought you just squeeze it up there before DTD?!

I’m b jealous of your BD schedule! Sadly my OH has not got the same libido as me so there is no way we could do it every day! I think aiming for every other day is probably a good idea though- and maybe takes some of the stress out of madly OPKing !

lizwells2020 · 09/02/2021 16:29

@glow92 so with you on people making it look easy! And if one more person says you need to just relax.......

glow92 · 09/02/2021 16:30

Omg I didn't even look at the dates! Just assumed it was today as it was at the top of my feed 😂.
That's fantastic, congratulations!
I ordered some conceive plus lubricant but haven't used yet I don't want my partner to get weirded-out, he's so chilled about it all and always wants to dtd so want to keep it relaxed and fun for him.

Original poster
SEpoppet · 09/02/2021 16:33

@lizwells2020 thanks so much. Trying not to get too excited as it really is so early but I've never even had a squinter before and this one was pretty clear. Yeah so you squirt a bit of preseed up before, do the deed, and then after you insert the ferti Lily cup to keep it all up there! I'm not going to lie, it isn't pretty but I think it got the job done! I have used pre seed on it's own for a few months but didn't find it was making a difference. I get loads and loads of watery cm around ov which I've read can actually be just as good if not better.

OP posts:
Original poster
SEpoppet · 09/02/2021 16:36

@glow92 thank you! I didnt even tell my hubby I was using the preseed, I would just squirt a bit up there in the bathroom before. So glam, not!

OP posts:
lizwells2020 · 09/02/2021 16:50

Oh that’s so interesting! I was actually about to throw away my lily cup as don’t like using it for AF but now I definitely won’t and I’ll be trying your trick!

I actually misread your post before and didn’t realise your BFP was TODAY! So amazing. You must be so so happy. I can’t even imagine looking at that stick and seeing the second line. I think I would just lose it now and keep looking at it every second not believing it!!

I know it must be tough after trying for what feels like ages but try to just enjoy it now and let yourself get excited!!! The fact you have conceived is BRILLIANT and shows your body can do it and has done it! Hooray! Wishing you a healthy and happy 9 months!! Xxxxx

glow92 · 09/02/2021 17:08

I actually have the mooncup! I've used it the last couple days after dtd and will definitely continue to now I'm so pleased I read this today haha.

@lizwells2020 I know, feel like we're doing everything right and then someone comes along on the first time 'that wasn't even trying'....!

Original poster
SEpoppet · 09/02/2021 18:39

Ah @lizwells2020 that's so kind thank you - very wise words. I have been checking it about once every 30 secs Grin The worst thing was DH was on a work call so I couldn't show him for 3 hours! So weird that you commented on my post on the very day I got a positive - I feel it is fate and now you have heard about the cup it will make all the difference! I actually didn't use a menstrual cup, it is a specific one designed for TTC - cost about £30 but apparently it increases your chances of conception by 150% over 3 months. Perhaps the menstrual cups work the same though! Good luck ladies, keep me posted x

OP posts:
Hopingformydb · 09/02/2021 21:16

Oh my congrats OP @SEpoppet what a coincidence haha see it does happen eventually!! I'm month 2 of TTC no 2 so I'm hoping its before 12 months 🤞🤞🤞 good luck with pregnancy xx

ComeONBridget · 09/02/2021 21:26

On our fourth month of trying too 🤞🏼. Fell pregnant the first month, first time. Don't know why it's taking so long 😞

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