Tits out, chin up and ❤️ yourself - TTC Bus 19

[Juno231]

Come join us on our TTC journeys - all you need is a sense of humour!

Bus history:
June - 24 BFPs
July - 11 BFPs
August - 18 BFPs
September - 4 BFPs

October BFPs so far:
@blackcurrantqueen - Oct 5th
@mrsbear1122 - Oct 12th
@savethechubbyunicorns - Oct 13th

Testing dates:
@adogisforlife - October 17th
@pebblesinthesand - October 17th
@mosherchick - October 18th
@Vil10 - October 21st
@ladybird345 - October 22nd
@lucyrp - October 22nd
@Franklydear - October 25th
@Kay00 - October 25th
@Juno231 - October 26th
@dsr87 - October 28th
@clairey844 - October 30th
@notyetamumbuttrying - October 31st
@katao - November 1st
@2020mission - November 2nd
@nestinginNL - November 18th
@Hopeful110 - November 22nd

@Franklydear I bow to you 🥒queen (I actually do, my CD doesn't matter & I still update Femometer 😂) honestly mate you crack me up prob as much as I do you. Love it your Facebook comment 😂

@Mosherchick you are too sweet when I think your 3 months was likely worse. Flax seed you say (adds to list of "might as well try!") I drink pomegranate juice & swear that's helped

Thank you @Vil10 yeah it's just when you hope for a bit of a "fist pump" I hear ya & it's ok and do you know what the ppl that teach out are the ppl who I've become mates with from Mumsnet when DS was born who I'm still close with so yeah, you guys are very important & why you can't get rid of me! You are ON ONE THIS MONTH!! Love it girl!

Ah thanks so much ladies, knew you'd all be accepting of my creepiness! That was actually my first post on MN ever, so still figuring it all out!

@Clairey844 no ideas for the badge unfortunately! I do love @Minster2012 idea but I feel it may be a tad inappropriate 😂

Thanks so much @franklydear @lucyrp @Vil10 @mosherchick and everyone else for the welcomes! I'm usually good for keeping up with reading but we'll see how I go with replying, feel I've missed some already!!
@mosherchick My wine drinking skills are phenomenal (possibly what prompted me to bite the bullet and jump on board today!!) so I feel you!

My mam has suggested I stop drinking if we're TTC. I almost quoted 'Drink til it's pink' to her, but didn't think she'd understand 🙈

Thanks @2alreadywantanother and sorry for your recent loss 💕

@notyetamumbuttrying hopefully this is the month month bus ends as everyone joins a grad bus!! Fingers crossed the efforts to improve sperm quality pay off soon 🤞🏼

@Minster2012 Thanks so much for the welcome! Definitely treated myself with copious amounts of red wine - my weakness!! Fair play to you for doing the post - it sounds lovely and a pity that people didn't show support. I know it's a very personal thing but speaking openly like that should be applauded - even if they don't feel ready to talk openly with you. At least you have the support here! I'm in awe of you and your strength after everything you've gone through!!

@clolo ooh that's good!! Still not heard but Dh has his urologist appointment on the 28th Oct. will chase them up next week as it was only days apart when we asked to be referred.
@Vil10 I was like that yesterday hence why we did it this morning! I was aiming for every other day but I just couldn't last night. Was so windy 🤭
@RecordPlayer ah thanks, don't think we'll see a difference until Nov tho as he only made changes from end of aug and takes 3 months to make nice new ones but as everyone always tells me...it only takes one good one! 🤪
@Minster2012 hopefully it's just a case of delayed reaction. I'm sure you'll start seeing things soon, if not on fb but on WhatsApp or IRL etc.x

Oh @Minster2012 that is crap! I’m really sorry! I’m so sorry you’ve been going through so much and you’re right, the journey can make you feel utterly alone. But let’s keep looking forwards as you are :) And you have all of us to keep you company, here for you for anything! Lots of magic dust being thrown your way my lovely! Xxx

@Newbie0818 Hello lovely! Oh the PCOS is bloody crap isn’t it? My cycles are all over the place and fairly long so it just makes doing anything much more of an effort- never know if and when I’m ovulating, never know when to do the deed, never know whether a cycle is going to be a dud one. Absolutely exhausting!

I’m on metformin but that was only started a month or two ago, my GP was refusing to do anything before that.

How are you getting on with it? What are your cycles like? Xxx

my anxiety is through the roof tonight trying my best to not let it knock me but all this shit about going into another lockdown for 3 weeks in wales is setting me off. my job isn't as secure this time etc 😬

@Minster2012 I think it's a mix of people not knowing what to say or how to approach it too but I'd be like you and upset that friends and friendly didn't reach out! You're never getting rid of us now lady!!

@notyetamumbuttrying you'll deffo be covered don't worry about that! It feels horrible when you're so sick and bloated doesn't it, the last thing you want is to be jumping and jiggling around!

@AmesK from what I know of PCOS from the lovely ladies here & the long cycles & DTD over the time it seems very frustrating & a bit soul destroying but there was the lady who was doing the clear blue OPKs when I was and she got 14 days of flashing smiles in a row when I was laughing I had the same & they were just mocking me & so I gave up at 11 days & she got a static at day 14 & she fell pregnant that month so keep the faith 🤞🏻❤️

@RecordPlayer ive just drunk the rest of a bloody good red wine I have to say from majestic. Testing more expensive wine in honour of AF & also we send out a few bottles to customers at Xmas (though this year we will be donating to food banks our usual corporate customer fund) so we always have some tasting sessions. Really good. And your mum meh, little bit of alcohol is good for loosening the vagina strings, Was she teetotal when she conceived you? Maybe you might consider it next year eh if you are still on the bus but certainly no need yet unless you choose to of course. As @Vil10 said the other week (I wholeheartedly agree with but I like my drink), if you conceive then you've got months of not drinking so why not drink before that of course in moderation as with anything, But as with everything it's entirely up to everyone 🥰😘

@lucyrp catchphrase, I haven't watched that on agessssssss have you had a lovely time off with OH?

Morning sunshines 🐞

Welcome to the newbies!

@lucyrp ah love, I can't imagine how you're feeling about more lockdown. I really feel for you.

If it's ok I might be ready to share my situation because I really need some support and don't know where to go (sorry in advance if it ends up being a long msg).

For anyone who doesn't know me, I'm 34, TTC #3, MMC at 11 weeks in Feb. I've been on this bus since #1 and got my BFP in early June. Jump forward a few months and we made the heartbreaking decision to terminate for medical reasons. I'm not going to go into details because I honestly feel a lot more resolved with it (am seeing a psychologist and being well taken care of so don't be worrying about me!).

So I needed to give a bit of context to the next part, my current situation:
The whole experience was almost unbearably difficult, I was in a pretty bad place. But a big part of what lifted me out of the depths was looking forward and getting excited to try again. Before I even had the D&C OH and I had a conversation where we both agreed to try again straight away.

Fast forward probably 6 weeks (cycle out of whack after procedure) to me ready with OPKs, CM checking, gearing up for the big ov day...

Got a blazing opk and loads of EWCM tuesday 13/10 and told OH I'm ready to go!
OH then tells me he doesn't think we're in the right place to be trying again and that he doesn't want to have unprotected sex. He actually offered to have sex using a condom.
I nearly lost my fucking mind.
Have been pretty confused and upset since and we've been fighting A LOT.

SO, the other part is that we actually had sex the night of 12/10, being totally unaware of if ov day was close or not (my opks were honestly white as white on that day).
I know that would have been a very fertile day, so I'm technically in my TWW, but in the unlikely event that I get a BFP I will know my OH won't be excited about it. I know it takes two to tango, he has to deal with it etc etc, but I'm more worried for his mental health, my mental health, and our suffering relationship. If it's BFN it will mean I have no idea when he will be ready to try again, could be many months, and I would feel devastated.

Thanks so much if you made it this far!

I don't know that I need advice as such (though if you have any pearls of wisdom, feel free), but really need a hand hold over the next week before I test.

I hope this all makes sense xx

@Minster2012 also meant to say, I'm sorry you're feeling unsupported after your candle post 💗 FB can be such a tricky gauge of friendship, but I hope your family and friends care more than you realise, and chose to show it in different ways xx

@Minster2012 i lobe all the saturday night tv, and we had a chinese too so was a proper old school saturday. haven't really had one in ages as OH is on his game a lot of the time so was nice to just have a chilled evening watching tv. also i find nowadays that as people in general we don't tend to watch just what's on the tv anymore if you get me ? like when i was younger you'd stick the telly on and watch whatever came on and it was likely really good tv whereas now you pick like netflix or a film etc ? but last night was good old saturday night tv! can't complain ! we've had a nice time off together yes but we haven't really done anything! just been at home really ! 🙈

@Skip86 it's so crap honestly, my work was so good to us last time so can't see them being an arse this time but our manager is scaremongering us all at the moment sayinf she's looking for other jobs as she doesn't think we'll stay open etc but i did hear some gossip about only her job not being stable as we're actually able to run it without her so not sure whag to think 😬
oh lovely i'm so sorry you had to terminate for medical reasons, i have a family member who fell in love with her husband at the age of 14 who had a genetic disease which meant he wouldn't live much past the age of 40, the symptoms all actually started showing on their lovely wedding day which was heartbreaking and then i'm sure they had to terminate 2/3 pregnancies when ttc as all the babies has this genetic disease. they finally got their miracle baby but her husband passed away a couple of years ago now at the age of 46 leaving behind his daughter who was only 9😔 she's the spitting image of her daddy tho and its so lovely. sorry for the long winded reply but i just wanted to say lots of people have to do this and you're not alone and it is for the best. i'm not really sure what to say on the ttc again front, is the reason you had to terminate for likely to happen again ? maybe that's why he's thinking he doesn't want to do soon? you said you're seeing a psychologist, would it be good for him to speak to someone too ? xx

i forgot to add this too, took my temp this morning and my lovely fermometer app decided to tell me this 🙄🤷🏼‍♀️

i forgot to add this too, took my temp this morning and my lovely fermometer app decided to tell me this 🙄🤷🏼‍♀️

@Skip86 I'm so sorry for everything you've been through. It sounds like you've had a really rough run.
As you say you can appreciate he needs time etc too but how annoying he was all for it then backed down, I'd feel really frustrated too!!
I will keep everything crossed for you for this month! Xx

Morning ladies

@Skip86 oh lovely sending you loads of hugs 😘have you said to DH one of the reasons you could deal with the D&C was because you thought you had a plan you were both on the same page with? Obs you prob will have done I guess. We are here for you whether it's BFN or BFP and he may also be actually disappointed at the end of the month if it's BFN, who knows. Has he been to counselling? Keep talking to us hun xxxx

@skip86 ah hun. You poor thing 😥 you really are having a rough time. I suppose looking in from the outside and knowing my Dh main priority and worry in all this is me. It's not easy on them watching as our hearts crush. Have you spoke to each other about what happened. After my mmc there, I was worried sick DH wouldn't want to ttc again because my heart was broken. And he seen the pain and upset it caused (plus I'm now 40) but me talking helped him talk and ge was the one who actually suggested trying when "I" was ready. I personally couldn't bring up the subject in fear of him saying NO. What's important is remembering hes grieving too. And sometimes (not necessarily ur situation) we forget about the dads in all this.
I know your in a situation now with the tww but honestly as frightening as it may seem, what's for u wont pass you.
But try and have him open up to u. But I totally get where you coming from on the using a condom part, I'd be heartbroken. You need to talk to him. Explain how u feel and find out what he feels.
Sorry, a bit long winded there but ur not alone huni. We are here for you night and day xx hope it all works out. Ttc can be stressful on relationships as is without going through what u did xx

@Skip86 I'm so so sorry for everything you've been through, I can't even imagine the pain! Maybe it could be good for DH to go and see a psychologist too? Hopefully then you might be able to get on the same page and support each other! Has he said why he isn't ready to try again? We're here for you no matter the outcome❤️

@lucyrp what dpo are you?? Are you going to test or just wait?

We DTD this morning and it seems that started af off a bit more. Below is how I feel!

@Minster2012 aww we're here for you. And don't forget not everyone pays attention to social media as much anymore, they may just have missed it. Hugs 💕

@AmesK it's crappy and GPS just know shit all about it despite all the research on there! If you're not already, follow #pcosawareness on Instagram as I've found so much helpful info on there.
My cycles aren't as long as some, they seem to be around 35-60 days so far, this one being 34 really makes me happy tbh. Before that I never knew when and if ov was happening but temping has helped too. We're just at the start of fertility help now and I know to be blood ruthless with the doctors from all the other experiences I've heard about!
How does the metformin work?

@Skip86 hand held 💕

@lucyrp sorry about anxiety, it really sucks x

Ah and @minster2012 totally get u on the in laws ignoring ur post. Like we were talking about b4 some people are just awkward and prefer to ignore situations rather than discussing them. Like @newbie0818 said, some skip through facebook too and only see what they want to see. My DH is certainly 1 of them.
Hope ur okay xx

@Vil10 i'm either 11/12dpo i'm not sure. or i might be either! going to wait as i don't have any tests in the house but thinking i maybe should order some in the next couple of days. AF should be due tuesday/ wednesday.

@Newbie0818 it reallt is shit x

@lucyrp I'm exactly the same!! 11dpo af due Tuesday or Wednesday!! I don't have any tests in either, but I have the urge!!

@Juno231 wow I can't believe how fast these threads move! Sorry I haven't kept up. However, the good news is it's a short bus ride for me, as got my BFP after giving in and testing a couple days early! Still in shock to be honest, just hope it sticks. Keeping my fingers crossed for you and all the other ladies on here

@Vil10 but then i may not have ovulated at all so i'm not as keen to test and even if af doesn't show on the day i think then still doesn't mean anything 🤣 but then fermometer is teasing me saying it can see an implantation dip and the fact my temps have gone down could be due to estrogen rise 🙄

@lucyrp if your app is predicting implantation though then surely that's a good sign?? I have a positive feeling!! One minute I'm like ooo I could get my BFP with how my rhr is looking but then I'm like well I always think this and then I get a bfn, it's such an emotional rollercoaster!!