TTC after MC - August 2020 (Thread 10)

[VP91x]

Hey ladies ❤️

BFP list
@Hayleylou89
@1990EM
@Tink20058
@mumoftwobeauts
@DontStandSoClose
@peonyrose87
@Ejb86
@Girlmum83
@Dipsy77
@DBTJ
@SmileyT
@ManchNic
@Niisa
@fafi
@2020wish
@calimommy
@Rebecca1992
@Beesy90
@Pugprincess
@IWM20

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@VP91x
@Runnergirl1
@Hayley19835
@Mommybear05
@HE88
@Rainbowhope11
@HopeForRainbowbaby
@Renna
@Diorissimo1985
@Rb486
@Wishingfornumber2
@Northernsoul90
@Sallyjo27
@Jazper
@littletandme
@MichT4
@Re6ecc4
@Bellabubble
@Lollol86
@Firevie
@stayinghopeful92x
@chloedancer897
@MrsK21
@LKMH
@CasperFlamingo
@Scrambledeggy
@Happyvibes
@Bl0ndi3
@Lemondropsandgumdrops

Update on me - there is no update 😂 CD20, not even a sniff of a positive OPK and no temp rise. Will have bloods done in the next couple of days. Gynae appt on 16th Sept is the plan xx

@SmileyT I am so not productive at home though 😂😂, terrible. Oh god, that's so shit that they'll get zero pay! I'm not sure if the government should be allowed to affect people's income like that. Totally get that it is a risk to go away but that's a massive hit to take because of a snap decision! Yeah, I still done OPKs today but definitely don't think it'll happen now. My GP won't do anything else now until my gynae appt where they'll put me on a metformin/clomid combo they said. So just have to wait that out. Xx

@HappyVibes thanks lovely, I'm just glad I know now it is the PCOS causing all of this otherwise I'd be so frustrated like I have been before.xx

Ah I see @VP91x I’m not sure if you saw my earlier post to another lady regarding Inositol? One of my friends was diagnosed with PCOS. She had gone 7months without a period - started taking Inositol & I kid you not, within 4 days her period came along. If you research into there are so many TTC success stories for ladies with PCOS particularly - it’s like baby magic apparently. My friend literally was just taking that, no metformin or clomid - they were her next steps had she not conceived in a couple of months. Xxx

@HappyVibes yeah I've heard great things, I've been taking myo-inositol this month! I'm lucky in that I do get periods every month they have just been hugely irregular post-MC between 20-33 days. So hopefully it does help things! Xx

@scrambledeggy Sorry that you feel that way and I'm sad to see you go! You aren't silly or immature at all, the one thing that joins us all together in this thread is the shared experience we have of miscarriage regardless of where we are in our lives or our other experiences.

Thinking about it I don't really know anything much about any of you ladies other than your mc and ttc journeys but I think it's really nice that we have created a community from such sadness. Do come back in the future when you feel like it! Wishing you the very best and I hope you get your bfp soon ❤️ xx

@VP91x that’s one of the hardest things I’ve found about post MC - how much it has knocked my cycles. Before I used to be able to read my body pretty well but now I just let it’s do it’s thing cos I have no blooming idea what she’s doing ha. Just let her do her thang & hope for best at the moment.xxx

@scrambledeggy sorry you feel that way and hope you rejoin the thread soon. No one really has life sussed out though and don't let what snippets strangers choose to share on social media or Mumsnet get to you or think people have a perfect life.

For those with BFPs I agree there is a lot of pregnancy chat on the thread but personally, I really hope this TTC after MC thread becomes one where we all get our BFPs🤞🏽 so on a personal note- please don't feel bad sharing your anxieties or what you're going through with your pgs xxx

Hi everyone
Hope it's ok to post on here. I suffered an ectopic pregnancy at the start of june at 6/7 weeks pregnant. I was devastated.
The time has come again to TTC and it feels surreal to have to go through all this again.
I'm on CD1 today so this is my first cycle TTC.
Just hoping it doesn't take too long to fall pregnant again

Hey ladies sorry I have me MIA but alot has went on recently... I have been on reading almost every night

@VP91x so sorry to hear about ur wee rabbit and the annoyance with the no peak keep positve not long now to ur appointment. Not long now to u get ur puppy also😁.
@MichT4 how cute is ur pup! oh my give me puppy fever along with baby fever might tip me to get another 😂 finger crossed for ur test I also see a shadow of something. 🤞

@SmileyT glad to hear ur bean in cooking away nicely in there same for u @2020wish 😁

@Pugprincess congratulations on the positive and sorry to hear about the brown can be such a confusing time but try not to stress it cohld just be old leftover from last. Keeping everything crossed for u.
@BEESY90 hope I have tagged the right person up its hard to keep track had 2 threads to catch up on... how horrible of other half to say those things but congratulations on ur bean and u can totally do this by urself u deserve someone better than that.

@chloedancer897 I read ur long comment a few pages back and my heart was absolutely breaking for u love so sorry to hear ur feeling so down about it it gets to us all at somepoint goodluck with ur ava and am hoping u dont need the treatment and u get a surprise before it starts 💖

Going to start another comment to catch u up on me otherwise this will be ridiculous long 🤦‍♀️😂

Also congrats to the bfps i have missed out on and hope the rest of u are well

so here I am.... 🤦‍♀️😂been missing for about 2 week if u recall I was on cycle day 41 well af finally showed cd42 whole 2 weeks late 🙄never had before and 2 weeks before that am sure u will before my melt down before my fertility appointment 🤦‍♀️just trying to catch u up. Well oh has been acting up and being a rather dick recently and just fucking off on a whim with his mates and been so un affectionate so we had a chat about it after I threaten to chuck him out. But to be honest its been going on a few month now. Well the other week I found out by over hearing hes booked a holiday with 29 yes 29 of his mates( who even knows that many people ! )Anyway and paid the deposit without telling me anything about it and whn his mate mention it he tried to chenge the subject instantly knowing i could of heard i went off on one. A mean who even does that 4 years we have been together what a tosser anyway I tried to chuck him out but he refused to leave and managed to worm his way out it withing a week. We spoke av told him thats him no more ripping the piss this is what's happening and if it doesn't ur out basically everything was going so fine. Then today hes left to go fishing with these mates at 4 told me hes be home for 11. But heres where it gets even better I. I stay right next door to this mate hes away fishing with and as I was leaving at 5 to go to work my neighbour on the other side also his mate has said oh peace for u when u get home as they are away camping i said oh u must be mistaken he just away fishing hes said no they won't be back till tomorrow they took tents. So .....I left it thinking maybe hes picked him up wrong well I text him at 12 hey when will u be home hes said oh maybe a hour maybe 2 or maybe the morning wtf. What a lying cunt hes known exactly what he was doing all along. So I have finished it told him to pick his keys and bags up from the neighbour tomorrow when he's back and lose my number 🙈.why all the lying and secrecy 🤔Fuck wtf happened hes never been like this before but I know 1 thing for sure I am not taking it at all so I guess my ttc time is over. Which I think is what I am more sad about right now al probably greive that first before the relationship.
I mean am definitely not over reacting here ladies am I 🙈x

@scrambledeggy I'm sorry you feel that way dear ! In my opinion you show maturity by admitting how you feel 😍 it was a process for me for dealing with my emotions after first miscarriages ( honestly I couldn't hear about new pregnancies of close ones too much especially that I have got people around me with due dates around my first two pregnancies' due dates... it was just making me sad). After second miscarriage I was better in dealing with those emotions but it took me two months to say to myself it is ok if I'm not pregnant this month. I believe 2021 will be the year I will be a mom. So take your time ! And whenever you feel like chatting with us, we are here 😘 I'm very sure you will have your bfp and sticky baby very soon! Sending you lots of love ❤️

@Stayinghopeful92x it is hard to judge without knowing your partner . But I would be mad too in your place. He is not communicating or including you in plans. I'm sorry that you have broken up. Within due time, you will be back to normal self ❤️ just need to go through the emotions related to this. Is he coming back today ?

@Stayinghopeful92x oh bless you, well done for being so strong and not putting up with it. If it’s a total change in his behaviour and your gut is telling you something isn’t right then it’s good to trust that I think. I’ve been with my OH a long time but we have had lots of break ups over the years. Some I thought I couldn’t come back from. How long ago was your MC? I’m just wondering if he’s not coping with it and it’s triggered this, men react so differently sometimes. Maybe after some time apart and him realising how serious you are and that you won’t put up with it will make him realise what he’s lost. I know my OH came back with his tail between his legs a few times. I think sometimes they need like a strong reset and shock to the system, I know mine definitely got confident that I couldn’t be without him and that’s when they think they can do what they like. We were together from very young though so a lot of this is years ago I’m referring to now. We broke up for 6 weeks once though and I was with someone else lol. Hopefully the time away and your actions will make him realise and go back to how he was. X

@VP91x I think it can be really tough working from home, I did it just after my MC for a few days a week and I honestly did nothing. I answered the phone and replied to emails but I wasn't very proactive at all, think it takes some getting used to 😂 And yeah I think it's really harsh if you go on holiday and a place isn't on the quarantine list and then they decide one evening that if you're not back by 4am you'll have to stay home for 2 weeks. He's had a really tough time over lockdown as he has 3 kids, one with ADHD and normally his parents helped a lot 😔

@Hopefulmummie I'm so sorry you find yourself here but hopefully you find this thread a good place of support whilst restarting your ttc journey. There have been loads of ladies that have conceived quickly after a loss so fingers crossed you join them soon xx

@Stayinghopeful92x ahh I'm so sorry that you're going through this and it can be hard to judge without knowing you both but my ex was like this towards the end so I have one view on it. My ex is honestly a good guy but we had a lot going on and rather than talk to me about it, he chose to escape at any opportunity, I tried to be a reasonable gf but it would just get worse and worse with the little lies. When I speak to him now about why he was such a dick, he says he just felt suffocated, we'd moved cities, started new jobs, were saving up to buy our next place and he just couldn't convey to me how that was making him feel so instead would say 'I'm going for one drink after work' and turn up at 4am 🤨 It is completely your choice how you deal with it, but after years together I'd ask to sit down with him and really ask what is going on. Explain how you feel and then give him time to explain why he is making these choices, you can still make your decision after that but at least you'll look back and know that it is a considered decision and not one made in the heat of the moment. Really hoping that if you love him and he loves you, you can find a way through even if that means putting ttc on the back burner for a bit. I really hope that you can sort it out or at least end things on good terms after what I'm assuming was a mainly happy relationship. Lots of love x

@Stayinghopeful92x oh gosh, I'm so sorry! I think you're absolutely right in breaking up with him. He's hurting you and worst of all lying to you. If he can lie about going camping for the night then there's more he can feel comfortable lying to you about. It doesn't even make sense because he would know that quickly you'd figure out he wasn't coming home 🙄. As you said it's all the lying and secrets that are something you can't live with, I wouldn't either. Importantly, now don't let him 'refuse to leave' let him go away and suffer the consequences of his actions. If in a few months time you feel like he has gone back to the person you loved then obviously that's a decision for you personally. Please, look after yourself and put yourself first ❤️

@SmileyT ah shit, that is tough. Poor guy, will work not budge on the zero pay thing? Yeah it is really bad, they should let you come back as normal if you were there before the cutoff date if that makes sense. What makes Suzie that got back today any different from Chloe who gets back tomorrow? 🤷🤷

Our dog arrives overnight today. So that's exciting xx

Oh wait forgot to say ladies.. I got a bloody temp spike. It's probably a one off..

But for gods sake 😩

@Stayinghopeful92x gosh that sounds like you've been having a rough couple of weeks. I agree with both @VP91x and @SmileyT in that for me, I couldn't deal with the lies. I can't be arsed with it, and I would also be wondering what's else could be being lied about. I also agree that maybe a chat with him is worthwhile, but I'd wait a while and let the dust settle, and also to see what his next move is once he goes. Absolutely don't let him stay again because he'll only realise how serious you are when you tell him to go. Problem is with men (and probs women tbf) is that if they see they can keep doing it and getting away with it, nothing changes.
I hope you are ok though, how do you feel about it all (other than angry).

@VP91x I can't believe the temp rise! What are the chances. Don't you just wish you had a crystal ball now to see if they stay up there?

Update from me - 2 very faint lines once again. I can't even be bothered to post a photo. I did a CB and a Tesco cheapie. Only thing making me think progress is that the Tesco one isn't an early and I'm pretty sure there's a line. And I did the invert thing and can see it there a bit. But then the CB one should be darker I think. I've got no idea. I was ready to just say it's bollocks and get the Prosecco out (later!) but of course I googled and quite a few things suggest it can be faint for a few days. So I think I'm going to find some non alcoholic bubbles and beer, put the tests away for a few days and enjoy the holiday. Either AF will show or I'll test in a couple of days and I will hopefully have more clarity. Not letting this get in my head for the holiday xx

@MichT4 I'm fuming 😂 I can't even say it's weather related because my temp didn't fluctuate even with the crazy weather. Fml. I wonder if it is a blip.

I'm sorry you're still in limbo ❤️ absolutely enjoy your holiday and test again in a few days. You'll know for sure then. Hope you've already had a nice/day evening yesterday xx

@Stayinghopeful92x wow how can people just change like that. You have done the right thing and give your self some time to heal. Sending lots of love xx

@VP91x oh how exciting about your dog, make sure you put some pictures up xx

@MichT4 oh no how bloody frustrating. Hopefully it gets darker over the next day 🤞🏻 what do you have planned for today? Xx

So today is the day I get my brows done, so excited 😆

@Lollol86 god I'm excited for you! I really wanted to get my brows done 😩.

I definitely will! My OH is like a kid at Christmas xx

@VP91x I was going to say that, it's actually got a little cooler. Don't suppose you've been DTD in the blazing heat?

@Lollol86 it is frustrating but I just can't be arsed with it 😂 I feel like it's going to knob me about all week and then be negative so I've missed a week of drinking. I'm aware I sound like an alcoholic which I'm not, but it's my holiday 🙄. As I'm sure you know I want it to be positive really, but I also just want to know. I still feel ok because I haven't got excited about it yet, so I just want to be sure what's happening.

Had a lovely chilled day yesterday and have had a coffee with my gorgeous view this morning, . I was up super early for testing so I had some nice quiet time. Nieces are up now so that's that done 😂. Think we will venture out today so I can find boring bubbles and see more of the lakes

Any plans? Super jealous of the brows!! xx

@scrambledeggy you might not see this but sorry you feel you have to leave. The other ladies have said it all but please don't feel like everyone else has it together; we have all been there for sure and we all struggle with our own things. You have to do what's right for you though and I admire you for being able to put your mental health first. Good luck with everything lovely. Always here xx

@VP91x super excited for puppy pics. What time does he arrive? xx

@MichT4 I don't blame you, if you get to end of the week and not have a drop and it is a positive then it would have been worth it, if it's not then you need to book another holiday to enjoy 😂😂
Are you all in 1 caravan? Does your sister know your situation?
Not much just my eyebrows this morning and then meeting a friend this afternoon but in all honestly
I just want to her back into my pjs already xx

@Lollol86 exactly! Hopefully I'll know mid week, although I won't know what to think if they are still there but faint. I'm expecting it to either disappear or be darker so I at least know.
I don't actually care about drinking, but I just want to find a good equivalent so I feel like I'm having a glass of bubbles.
Yeah we told them, we couldn't not. At least I can then just relax and not have the added worry of making stuff up

Your day sounds lovely. Just having the eyebrows done is a dream xx