Our first month ttc our first

[rosiej95]

As soon as AF disappears, which will be soon 🤞 me & my partner will be ttc :)
I've been keeping an eye on my cycles for a little while using the flo app & have been taking pregnacare.
Is there anything else we should know or do to help prepare ourselves? :)
Exited to go on this roller coaster of a journey & as no one knows of our plans would be lovely to hear off people ttc too :) xx

@Amy259 all the details 👆🏼😂

@Amy259 I'm only enjoying the DTD side of it, everything else is just a hassle!! 😂 Yeah I get that, he says the same he enjoys DTD with me so I'm like well show me then!! lol.

Honestly don't feel guilty sharing, it's an anonymous thread so here would be the place to ask for advice. Have you tried having a few drinks/beers beforehand, it might help relax his mind a bit? Obviously it's not ideal to be drinking every night but maybe just for those few days in your fertile week. It'll be so hard for him to just switch his mind off so I get where the pressure is coming from but maybe a few shots to cloud his mind a bit. That sounds a bit rapey now I read it back but obviously only if he consents to giving it a go! 😂

Omg how is AF not here yet?! With your temps being up before it deffo seemed like you had already O'ed?! And your temp dropped so it should be here... what is going on....if AF doesn't come today either I'd assume you haven't O'ed yet or like you say maybe a bit later than you thought? Maybe go from the first day you found the first high temp and count that as DPO1? Where would that sit you? How confusing!!

@Rice1992 Omg that's definitely a BFP....congratulations!!!! 💛

@meganlea thank you ♥️ Yeah he’s the same, says he loves it so I’m like right then let’s go 😂

Hahaha yeah that could do the trick! The weird thing is that obv the more we do it, the longer he lasts - and that’s when he starts panicking in his head that he’s not going to finish. Just because it happened that one time he panicked. I’m like ummm it’s absolutely fine that we’re going longer, buddy! 😂

That’s a good idea - that would put me ov around CD20 which is when I normally do, but I didn’t actually temp 19-22 so can’t be exact. But cd18 it was 36.23 and cd23 it was 36.54 so my jump could’ve been in there. Which could put me about 10dpo now. But I was LH testing 3 times a day and CB digi every morning then.. so how could I have missed it?!

How are things at your end? What did your temp do this morning?

@Amy259 ohh yeah I bet he felt a bit embarrassed when he couldn’t finish so now it’ll be in his head like it’s happening again taking his mind completely out of the moment. Haha yes, this is what I’ve been wanting for a long time don’t be shy ✨ keep trying ✨ lol.

Yeah you definitely couldn’t have missed it! Is 36.54 definitely a post ovulation temp for you because if it’s gone back down and no AF it could either be implantation dip (hopefully) or just not ovulated yet which would be weird because your temps were high?? You deffo couldn’t have missed it.... what CD did you start LH testing?

No change for me yet my temp went back to average this morning so god knows what’s happening. I’m just glad as it looks like I haven’t ovulated yet which means I haven’t missed anything. If I am going to ovulate and my cycle is 5 weeks again it will be in the next week as I’m CD18 today. Just attached my chart so far! I spoke to DH as well last night and he said he’s sorry for not putting in as much effort as I am but he will make sure he does in future. He said a lot more but that was a quick summary. I was still feeling a certain way last night though worrying I’d missed O day again so I wasn’t up for DTD so hope we can start tonight. Let’s see how long it lasts this time!! 😂.

@meganlea god look how steady your LH is! That’s mental! Yeah definitely looks like you haven’t ov yet.. which is annoying! But at least you’ve not missed your chance this cycle.

It normally sits around 36.0-36.2 before ov then about 36.5-36.6 after ov so that would’ve been right. I couldn’t check this morning as I had such a broken sleep so didn’t get 3 hours together. Hopefully I can check tomorrow, assuming af doesn’t come today. Maybe we’ll just dtd every couple of days until af comes just in case I’m having a super late ov, but I wouldn’t think so with those high temps... next cycle I need to get back into temping every day!

@Amy259 that makes sense! I totally get how it could be the case for men though. Don't really think about it from their side but it is pressure even if it's not from us.

My fiancé always has really hot baths.. like two a day. I've read that's not good so I've banned him!! 😂

@Rice1992 aw amazing. So so happy for you!! Keep us up to date!! 🥰

@meganlea 'that sounds a bit rapey' 😂😂😂😂 weak!!!

@meganlea update: just went to the loo and af is in full swing! Have absolutely not idea what went on this cycle as it means I either had a super long LP or completely missed ov or didn’t ov at all?! Who knows. Glad I know where I am though and definitely going to track more this month!

@beckyBP yeah no hot baths haha. Yeah I try to hide my obsessiveness from him and be super lighthearted about it but I guess that doesn’t stop him from putting pressure on himself!

@Amy259 it's frustrating every time I test I'm like ooo it could be this one!! been disappointed 30+ times so far haha! Yeah I'm still in with a chance it seem sand suddenly I'm excited and happy again. Crazy what TTC does to your mood!!

Awww no ... yeah definitely track this time just so you can see what's going on, it's good that your cycle was a bit shorter you might not have to wait as long now go again, fingers crossed. You'll know more once you start tracking!! At least you can enjoy some alcohol at Christmas now and not have to worry about your intake....eat and drink until you can't no more haha!! Ready to try again in the new year. Hope you're okay though. AF time really is an absolute bummer.

@beckyBP Honestly it didn't sound like that in my head but I read it back like okay it definitely doesn't sound right. Haha. I've not heard about this hot baths thing does that apply to women too?? DH has showers and they're never hot. But I love a hot bath, I LIVE for hot baths?!

@meganlea assuming we don’t need to worry about your testicles over heating and killing your sperm, I think your baths are okay! 😂😂

@Amy259 Oh thank god! 😂

@Amy259 glad you know where you are doll. You can relax over Christmas now.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 @Amy259 that cracked me up! @meganlea I love a hot bath too. I think it is just for those with the testicles so we're good!

😂😂 really making me laugh today! X

Hi everyone! I hope you don't mind me joining this thread!

My fiance and I have started TTC recently. I came off the pill in July and I have kept a vague eye on my cycles since then, and DTD around the predicted ovulation date in Flo. We've had no luck so far, but I think Flo might have my ovulation date a bit off. This cycle we've cranked it up a notch (it's a lockdown Christmas, not much else to do!) and have DTD every day since CD8 (now on CD12). I had some EWCM on CD11 so I think ovulation is near but I've been taking Clear Blue ovulation tests but no peak just yet, but having read this thread, I worry that once I've had the smily face I might actually be to late!

We're basically just DTD as much as possible in the run up/during my FW in case I'm ovulating earlier than Flo predicts (in previous months we've only really DTD a couple of days on Flo predicted O day and the day before).

Any tips from anyone who's been successful greatly appreciated!

Welcome @lydiarose7!

So basically you’re right - cb uses first urine of the day so your static smiley will probably come the morning after you peak. Most women peak in the afternoon then ovulate 12-36 hrs later, so you could be already ovulating by the time it goes static. If you’ve already been dtd that’s fine, but chances of a healthy conception from just dtd on o day are really low.

Because eggs only live 12 hrs once released, if you dtd after ov the likelihood is the egg could be old by the time the sperm reaches is so the chance of successful implantation is slim (or could end in a chemical for that reason).

I read a study recently where couples only had sex on one day - either two days before, one before, or o day and 85% of successful pregnancies were the days before.

So basically the day before peak and peak day are your best bets, although it could happen either side too. So tracking is good for using the data to predict, rather than waiting for the smiley - does that make sense? Sorry if that was too much info! I’m a researcher and can’t help myself. I think I’ve been dtd too late so next month will be starting before I predict I’ll peak xx

@Amy259 thank you so much - that is really helpful! I feel I can go into such a TCT rabbit hole so it's good to get some good advice!

I think for this cycle we'll DTD every day/every other day during the FW and see where we end up. Will keep you all posted!

We were/are due to get married in May 2021 but with the new restrictions things are feeling less likely and we don't want to wait another year to try for a baby as I know it can take a while for a lot of people!
x

@beckyBP she made me giggle too with that post ahha!

@Amy259 wow I just read all that and it's making me wonder now, like I'd want to DTD the days leading up to the surge, the day of the surge and the day after, but I might just not do the day after surge because if there's 85% chance the days before will work then what if it does more harm than good DTD the day after the surge. Like TMI but what if there's sperm sat in there fighting for the egg, although I know sperm don't actually fight each other but what if they knock the sperm positioned perfectly waiting for the egg out of the way and then they start trying to get to the egg but it's too late then because the egg has already matured a bit.....IDK maybe I'm thinking too much in to it haha. Do you think it'd be harmless to DTD the day after the surge too, or could it hinder your chances? I might have a quick google

@meganlea I’ve had all those thoughts too 😂 plus I always worry about dtd around implantation time - can a whoosh of new sperm/semen flush away a wee fertilised egg trying to implant?! But apparently not...

I’m not sure about dtd on o day doing harm, I don’t think so. If the egg has already released and met sperm sitting waiting on it, new sperm on o day don’t stand a chance. I think the aim is just always to have the sperm waiting on the egg.

I’m trying to find a great table I saw but can’t seem to locate it! Basically sex 2 days before ovulation was most successful, then one day before (peak day) was next best, o day was really low and the day after was 0%. The facts about the scientific trial came from a great ttc book I read, and actually none of the ladies in the trial had successful full term pregnancies from just having sex on o day. So yeah, it’s aaaall about before! And not waiting for that peak!

@Amy259 let me find this book!!!.....some bed time reading for DH hahaha

Welcome @lydiarose7 we were due to get married this year! Twice actually 😂 and TOTALLY get where you're coming from with not wanting to delay starting a family. That's what we decided too.

We're trying preseed for the first time this month. Heard really good things!!

@Amy259 I really need to read that book as I was amazed by that and wouldn't have know / thought it at all!

@meganlea @beckyBP couldn’t recommend it more.

www.amazon.co.uk/Impatient-Womans-Guide-Getting-Pregnant/dp/1451620705/ref=nodl_?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

There are bits of it that are quite American, like what diagnostic tests to ask your ob-gyn for, and a couple of stats I’d rather not have learned (like how quick the average couple under 35 conceive!) but it totally debunks every myth you’ve ever heard plus answers all questions about supplements, timing, herbs, positions, you name it. It really helped me with all my obsessive googling - answers the questions with science not opinion xx

Hey everyone! Hope you all had a lovely Christmas!!

Luckily Christmas week fell during my fertile window so we've DTD CD 8, CD 9, CD 10, CD 11, CD 12, CD 13, CD 15 and CD 16. I got my LH peak on Christmas Day (how festive!). I think we'll try and DTD CD 17, CD18, CD19 to be sure, and see how we get on! Luckily my fiancé has a pretty HSD so doesn't take too much persuading but it's scary that you can do everything you're meant to do and still unsure whether it will work!

Keeping fingers crossed for everyone!

Lydia
Xoxo

Merry Christmas ladies!!

@lydiarose7 wow - that’s impressive!! So much dtd, I’m exhausted reading it 😂 fingers crossed, you’ve definitely given yourself a real good chance anyway!! I’m not sure I’d managed to stop it from becoming routine/repetitive if we did it that much - what’s your secret there??

The first couple of days after ov are always my favourite, when you know you’ve done everything you can and it’s out of your control now. Then obviously the two week wait kicks in, but that’s another story 😂 enjoy the satisfaction of knowing how well you’ve done and it’s out of your hands now!! Xx

@Amy259 I know! It's been quite full on but with lockdown and the Christmas holidays I feel like we've had quite a lot of time on our hands!

I was thinking the same actually - now I'm in the TWW I'm sure it will start to drag but the first few days I feel like I can just relax a bit!!

Will keep you all updated xxxx

Hello ladies! Hope you don’t mind me joining in - have just been reading your thread in the bath (I feel less crazy now haha!).

Currently on my first cycle of ttc with my fiancé after our wedding due this year was also postponed! I’ve been super broody for over a year now and we agreed to wait until after we got married (had to fit into the dress my parents put a deposit down on!) but since postponing Ive felt like Im about to explode with broodyness, plus we’re not even sure if we can have the wedding for a couple of years now as my parents live in NZ so no idea when they will be able to travel safely. So we decided why not give it a go now instead of waiting until after our new wedding date - I’m 31 so I’d be at least 34 by the time we had our first if there are no issues but I can’t bear to wait that long!!!

According to Flo I ovulated on Xmas eve so we dtd 21, 22, 23, 25 Dec (not on actual ovulation day though! Think my fiancé wanted a bit of a rest haha). So I should be 3dpo now.

But!! Reading through the thread it sounds like Flo isn’t as accurate as I thought. I’ve got very regular cycles of 28/29 days so I assume I usually ovulate at some point in the window!

Mild cramping today (hence the bath!) which is unusual for me and I’m spending every waking moment on google symptom spotting - would die if my fiancé saw my internet history the last two weeks haha!

Anyway, thought it would be nice to find a lovely group of girls to chat to during the madness! Xxxx