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Conception

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Would you TTC if you were in my position?

9 replies

fornowmaybe · 29/07/2020 00:10

I don't know what to do. DC is 22 months old. We wanted to try for #2 before the pandemic but then lockdown and furlough happened so we decided to wait for a bit. DH's job is 100% safe and OK and he is also the higher earner. I work in the hospitality industry and I'm currently on furlough. Last month we had an announcement that there will be redundancies, which there was but it was confirmed to me via a letter that my role is not currently under risk of redundancy or change of contract but should the situation change, this will be reviewed. I know quite a few people we made redundant or are in the process still. There is only 3 people in our department and we all do a very specific job. After receiving the letter of confirmation from my employer, I originally wanted to TTC next cycle but thinking about it gives me so much anxiety because if there is a second round of redundancies, there is the risk of losing my job again which we can't afford (I am only assuming due to the comment on the letter). I personally don't think there will be but I'm naturally a very anxious person and a worrier. I was told this week that the other 2 members in our team (one senior and one who has been there 6 months longer than me) have been brought back part time to do their job and help with the day to day tasks. I was not asked but at the same time my side of the job isn't needed during the pandemic or at least until things pick up a little so I think this may be the reason. There's a part of me that thinks that they decided to bring them back to see if the 2 of them can do both their jobs as well as mine so they could get rid of me if that makes sense? I don't think we should wait any longer as the age gap is already too big for what we wanted but I also can't stop worrying. I guess my questions are

  1. Do you think a second round of redundancies is likely to happen once they've already made people redundant the first time round?
  1. Would you TTC if you were in our shoes?
OP posts:
fornowmaybe · 29/07/2020 00:25

Anyone? Grin

OP posts:
Livingmagicallyagain · 29/07/2020 06:46

What do you think you'd regret more?

I would try!

fleurdeliz · 29/07/2020 06:51

Honestly there is never a good time to conceive. My first was conceived 4 weeks after my husbands cancer diagnosis after being told to try now because we might not be able to in the future. Shit timing, wonderful baby and it all worked out ok.

The future can't be predicted. Life can't be planned.

Go for it

RaisinGhost · 29/07/2020 06:55

If it was the 3rd/4th + you were having I'd say don't take the risk. But for a 2nd? I'd go for it.

ivfdreaming · 29/07/2020 07:09

Yes a second round of redundancy is possible but there isn't much you can do about it

I wouldn't put TTC off - you don't know how long it will take anyway

fornowmaybe · 29/07/2020 07:23

Yes, very much so. I know I would regret it. I already regret not trying pre lockdown, things would have been perfect now. Things always work out for us one way or another. I'm only worried about losing my job and my entire salary which would put us in a very crappy situation. I think we will go for it and take things as they're thrown at us. The anxiety about it is sky high though!!

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RobinRose · 29/07/2020 07:38

Go for it! It is so easy to put obstacles in the way, if they weren't there and you have a child then something in your circumstances changes you will always find a way to make it work. You will manage and make it work whatever happens!

Regulus · 29/07/2020 07:46

I Agee with pp, for a third + child I would say wait but if you are careful babies don't cost much and by the time they start becoming expensive the covid crap will hopefully be sorted and you can get another job

fornowmaybe · 29/07/2020 08:03

I'm actually so glad I'm not the only one thinking like this. I will update you all when(if) I get my BFP Grin

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