Preconception planning - anyone want to join?

[sunflowersaremyfav93]

Hello!

I've been reading loads on the importance of pre-conception nutrition and preparing your body. Some say 3 months before and I've seen some that say 6 months before.

I find myself trawling through threads on Mumsnet but wondered if there were any ladies planning to start TTC in the next few months and wanted a forum to chat about ways to prepare / excitement of it all etc.

I often find myself going on to my bf and mum and they're like ok ok! 😂

@KittyT30 congratulations!! My manager at my old job was secretly pregnant on our Christmas do and she was drinking gin and lemonades all night... or so we thought! She was just having lemonade but we never for a second thought there wasn't gin in there as it looks the same - we only knew afterwards when she told us about the pregnancy. I reckon gin is a good way to go, and as it's your house you can make the drinksso they'll never know!

@KittyT30 my friend has always been really into having prosecco on a night out, we were our for dinner for her birthday and she was sharing a bottle with her sister (or so I thought!) - her sister just kept sipping from her glass every so often and I never noticed!! You could do that when out, but at your house I reckon just pour from a different bottle while standing at the fridge and no one will even notice. Good luck!

@mackjm20 & @Lollipop87 technically I reduced hours at the start of the year ago but only actually worked like that for a really short time

I don't know of any twins in the family, would just be our luck (DP just got his first grown up type job and thought he'd actually have money, then I got pregnant like 2 weeks later)

@sunflowersaremyfav93 it will be confirmed in about a week but no one is optimistic.

I think it's the woman that can have twins run in the family, something like some women are more likely to put out more than one egg and then fraternal twins happen. Identical twins are a fluke.

I got a call from the GP about my blood test, my prolactin level is high and they want to redo the test to rule out stress making it high. I said you are never going to get a needle in me and not have me incredibly stressed. She suggested various time frames ranging from next week to a few months to see if it changes and I replied that it wouldn't make a difference to my stress level, the only possible difference is the frequency of DD breastfeeding because she'll be at nursery for a bit or the week. I only realised this evening that there was no mention of my weight loss, a quick bit of research says that prolactin can prevent weight loss?! I need to go back to them and try and clear some of that up but I just shut down when people start talking about more needles

just asking for a friend... it’s such a low chance to get pregnant if you do the deed 4 days before AF right? Right?

Oh gosh morning freak out! DH and I just DTD AF due Monday and seem to be On a pretty regular cycle now. I don’t know why we did it unprotected it seemed fine in the moment and the app and everything I know says VERY low chance of getting pregnant.

But now I’m stressing like what if all the research is wrong. I’ve spent all my life preventing and now the research has got me all cocky in the moment lol! It’s meant to be November ahhh! Needless to say I don’t think I can cope with the stress of tracking low fertile days! Condoms it is from now!

Someone please tell me it would be like a near miracle conception (less than 1%) chance for this to happen?!

@mackjm20 you got cocky?! Hahaha🤣 I think your chances are pretty low

"The likelihood of getting pregnant right before your period is extremely low. For women with a typical 28- to 30-day cycle or longer and their cycles are regular, it is fairly safe to say your ovulation occurred between Day 11 and Day 21. The egg is only available for 12 to 24 hours for conception."

americanpregnancy.org/getting-pregnant/can-you-get-pregnant-on-your-period-9163

@olderthanyouthink yes twins can run in your family - they run in mine. Everyones first question when someone is my family is pregnant is "how many?". But apparently it's only non-identical twins that are hereditary as it depends on how many eggs a woman releases in her cycle. Identical are a fluke - although we have two sets of those as well (and i know of at least 4 sets of non-identical in my direct family line too). My DH is dying for twins to get it all done in one go (his treatments are painful and expensive) but having looked after twins I really don't want that.

@KittyT30 how are you feeling? I agree with PP about picking a mixer drink and then just not adding it. I always joke no one will ever realise I am pregnant - I don't drink much anyway and my fridge is always filled with pickles and cheese!

@mackjm20 to be fair even when done perfectly conception chances are still only about 1 in 3 so i think the chances are very low. Would it be that awful if it was a few months early?

@olderthanyouthink haha cocky! Pardon the pun! Thanks just needed talking down from my panic lol!

@Bells3032 absolutely you know when you just have a panic! It would still be amazing if it accidentally happened before nov just not the plan so going to be much more careful :)

I’ve been so desperate to start ttc and this morning there’s me having a full mini breakdown! I’m losing the plot lol. DH thinks I’m mad- self confessed x

@KittyT30 congratulations!! I think gin and tonic without the gin is a good idea, if that’s something that you’d normally drink? Or if you were feeling really committed you could decant a bottle of non alcoholic wine in to an empty wine bottle and then it wouldn’t matter if your in laws saw the bottle?

@mackjm20 I’m fairly certain you’ll be fine You’d have to have ovulated exceptionally late in your cycle (day 24ish) for an egg to still be viable? I have fairly regular 26/27 cycles and nearly always ovulated on day 14 or 15 when I used Natural Cycles for tracking. I think the latest I ever ovulated was day 18, so still a long time before my period.

My grandma was a twin, I don’t know if there are any more sets though and I don’t think once counts as running in families!
My ex boyfriend did say once when we were talking about babies that we would be very likely to have twins because they ran in his family too... I did very gently explain to him that it didn’t make any difference to us whether they ran in his family or not!

@MsQueenInTheNorth thank you :) this is why I need to track as I have no real idea of when I ovulate I was sure it would be fine then after DTD had sheer panic haha! don’t even know why I panicked so much when I want a baby so much lol! I’m a mess haha!

@mackjm20 cocky 😂😂 brilliant. I agree with the others I think it’s highly highly unlikely you’d get pregnant 4 days before period is due unless you ovulated super late. I’m also going potty today, I was busy with work this morn so cracked on with that and now I’m googling TTC and nutrition and buying a blender so I can make loads of healthy stuff haha.

@kittyt30 let us know what you decide to do, are you not telling them until the 12 week scan?

So with the twin thing, they run in my bf’s fam - his maternal grandad was a twin, maternal grandmother was a twin and paternal uncles are twins but because it’s his side it wouldn’t mean that I’m likely to carry twins?

Also another question... I recall reading somewhere that it’s best to eat fruit normally rather than in a smoothie because when they’re blended the fat breaks up in a different way, does anyone know if that’s the case?

Omg an old colleague just posted on Instagram she had her baby on Monday....my ovaries just exploded 😔 164 days to go!!!

@sunflowersaremyfav93 with the twin thing you are correct. It also depends on if identical or non identical. Identical is not hereditary (although there is some evidence that tendency towards it may be). If fraternal twins then him having it in the family will have no impact on your likelihood of having twins as it depends on how many eggs the woman releases on each cycle. However, if you have a daughter together it will increase her chances of having twins.

@sunflowersaremyfav93 yes what Bells said is right, it always really confuses me but this explains it very well and explains the theory that twins skip a generation (because men don’t ovulate so it won’t affect their own children being twins or not, but could be passed on to their daughter):

If you've heard that twins skip a generation, this myth is actually based on some truth. Here's how: If a man inherits the hyperovulation gene from his mother, he may pass this gene on to his daughter. His daughter, in turn, is then more likely to release more than one egg when she ovulates and therefore could conceive fraternal twins. So the twins have, in essence, skipped a generation. (From www.whattoexpect.com/pregnancy/twins-and-multiples/do-twins-really-run-in-families/)

And in answer to your question about fruit smoothies, yes but it’s due to sugars not fat - when fruit is blended the sugars in it become what’s called free sugars because the natural sugars are released from within the cell walls of the fruit. So they become more like added sugar rather than the natural sugar you get in whole fruit. I think they maybe have less fibre when blended too. I work for a well-known baby food company and remember our nutritionist explaining all this to me!

p.s. it’s a great part of my job that I get to look at cute pics of babies all the time, but also makes me soooo broody and I don’t know how I’d cope if I struggled to conceive!

@Lollipop87 @Bells3032 ah that's so interesting, thanks both!! And thanks on the smoothie thing, I think I'll stick to eating fruit as normal but using the blender for soups and sauces.

And oh god... even seeing pics of cute babies now makes me stupidly broody and impatient so yeah I bet that'd be a challenge!

@mackjm20 border biscuits are just a brand, my OH gets them for work for meeting rooms, of course as noone is there, he brought a whole bunch home!! also delaying sounds like a good plan if it means you wont be stressing as much! 92 days will fly by!! I cant believe its nearly September, I am sure @sunflowersaremyfav93 started this group in May or June?! Also I think your chances are quite low so you should be fine!

@threetree welcome to the growing group of crazy pre planners!!

@sunflowersaremyfav93 I do sometimes worry about drinking as well and then I remember that my older sister fell pregnant first try first baby and we had gone to 3 concerts back to back and were drunk for most of the week before she actually realised she was pregnant (obvs preg the whole time) and her daughter is honestly the most perfect little girl and so intelligent for her age! Sometimes I think its so easy to stress ourselves out and stress definitely does not help TTC.

@kittyT30 how about taking a glass and take the smallest sip ever and then when you wonder around dump it in the sink?? I suppose I need to know these tricks too because if I am lucky enough to fall pregnant, then I am gonna be pregs for Christmas and we've agreed to hosting the annual Christmas party this year with OH friends, who all drink like crazy!!

Thank you all for the kind welcome!

I agree I panic about hiding drinking too. I’ve definitely got a friend I’ll likely tell early on cause she will just know immediately! I’m hoping that i avoid any pregnancy at Christmas all together ideally!!!

Hi girls, luckily I have black wine glasses, you cant see through them or how much is in the glass. So il pour them a glass and pour a little into mine and pretend I'm sipping it😂. My husband said just dont offer them a drink, but il seem rude then😂. I feel fine but have havent went to the gym since I have found out and eating everything because I can 😅. Back to work on monday and tutoring in the evening every day so I'd say by week 6-9 the tiredness will kick in. Need to fill out self referral form online for mid wife, apparently most NHS scans are not until 14 weeks now. I'm going for 8 week early scan private and also might book 12 week private and then sure our news. Hopefully all goes ok.

My sister says pure orange juice is the cure for morning sickness

@KittyT30 haha oh no you can't not offer a drink 😂 how exciting though, how many weeks are you now?

Also this might be a stupid question, but once you've done the twat and it's positive do you call your GP?

Oh blimey... autocorrect.. I mean the test not the twat hahaha

@sunflowersaremyfav93 haha I think twat also works. I'd also like to know the answer to this? I think I'd probably wait a few weeks just to be sure it's actually real haha

Had doctors appointment today. Dh blood tests look really good and she's super happy where all his hormones are. Next step is to have a sperm analysis but in 2 to 3 weeks once he's been on the new drugs for four months. So that's the next hurdle and I will have to wait. Still having coil removed on Sept 1st cos whatever the next step is I want to give my hormones a few months to get back to normal after 15 years on BC

@sunflowersaremyfav93 so u can ring your GP when u find out, but all he does is refer u on. So like my sister I'm just gona do a self referral letter which u can do online. Then u see mid wife at 8 weeks and she normally does bloods.

Dinner was a success, poured myself a small glass of wine(in the black wine glass)in front of the mother in law. Just pretended I was sipping from it all night 🤣. At one stage I had to hers and mine up, sure I hadn't even drank any🤣. Thanks for the tips ladies. Also someone I know poured the non alcoholic drink into a wine bottle when over drinking in her friends house, another good trick.

I'm only 4 weeks, just found out 2 days ago. So very early on to be telling anyone. It's actually nice having it a secret between u and your partner.

*had to top up hers

@sunflowersaremyfav93 “once you’ve done the twat” has just had me laughing out loud, my husband thinks I’ve gone mad! 😂😂

@KittyT30 glad dinner went well, ooh that’s a good idea I have a black novelty wine glass that says 29 forever that I got for my 30th so I could always use that and if they think it’s weird I could say I’m feeling old and want to pretend I’m 29 again!

@Bells3032 @Lollipop87 Hahahah autocorrect comes out with the best stuff doesn't it, you're right though, twat also works 😂

@KittyT30 glad it went well and they didn't suspect a thing, I bet it's lovely just you two knowing for the moment.

Can't wait for us all to have positives and then we can chat about pregnancy stuff 😂

Also found this really interesting, I follow Zita West on Instagram too (if anyone looked at my followers they'd think I'm baby mad) and she posts really insightful content too.. don't feel so bad about the corner to I had last night now.