Preconception planning - anyone want to join?

[sunflowersaremyfav93]

Hello!

I've been reading loads on the importance of pre-conception nutrition and preparing your body. Some say 3 months before and I've seen some that say 6 months before.

I find myself trawling through threads on Mumsnet but wondered if there were any ladies planning to start TTC in the next few months and wanted a forum to chat about ways to prepare / excitement of it all etc.

I often find myself going on to my bf and mum and they're like ok ok! 😂

@wrensandrobins to be honest no different on or off it, I didn’t suffer too badly with cramps as a teenager though from what I can remember and emotionally I’ve been fine on and off the pill. The implant was another story which is why I came off it, I was so moody and touchy all the time! When I got it out my sister said to me “thank god I’ve finally got my sister back”, I didn’t realise it had been that bad until I got it out and felt loads better!

I would love to join in with this thread!

Me and DH are going to TTC from around October/November time.
I stopped my pill back in April. I was staying on it because I wanted to take it for our summer holiday this summer to ensure no period, but obviously that got cancelled so...off the pill I went! I've been tracking my cycles using OPK's and the premom app to get an idea of when I ovulate. It turns out I ovulate quite late (cycle day 20ish), so I am glad I am doing this because if I followed what the apps say it would be totally inaccurate for me!

I've been taking vitamin D and folic acid too. I actually found out that I am deficient in folic acid through blood tests last year despite having a good diet so that's something I'm being sure to take as it is important.

We also have a 'baby fund' savings account so when the time comes we can start buying our baby bits!

@StellaDelMare welcome to the team! Sounds like you'revwell prepared already.

So I joined the band wagon and bought impatient guide too....anyone else feeling totally overwhelmed by what supplements you should be taking?
I've been on pregnacare pre conception ones for almost a month, I bought a cheaper version in home bargains and compared the ingredients...folic acid was the same and generally pregnacare had higher dosages. Then read in the book what we should take and the rainbow ones she recommends contain vitamin a...which I thought we weren't meant to take?
All the brand's seem to vary on something and I don't know what I need. my diet isn't amazing...I don't like a lot of veg and OH hates me eating fruit so eat little of that.
Dr just says folic acid and vitamin D are enough...
Mind is blown!!

@butterfly5291 There's a lot of information out there and I think it's easy to get overwhelmed. My understanding is that, provided you're getting sufficient folic acid, there's probably no need to stress about the rest. I think a multi-vitamin like Pregnacare should have you covered.

Also(and please tell me to stop being nosey if you want!) why doesn't your OH like you eating fruit?

Also(and please tell me to stop being nosey if you want!) why doesn't your OH like you eating fruit?

I am wondering this too Can we be nosey together?

I’m with @queenatom personally, I’m just going to stick with a simple pregnancy multivitamin. My plan is to keep things as simple and low key as possible for as long as possible to try and avoid stress... That might not last though, who knows! NHS website is very anti Vitamin A though.

Haha he just hates it...can't be in the same room if I eat it or see the peelings from an apple or kiwi. It's very weird!

Maybe I'll just buy some more pregnacare again then and some calcium ? I don't even have milk in my tea!

Evening just had a catch up read through the comments :) I have purchased the ‘bible’ to jump on the band wagon and obsessed already.

Omgosh though all the information! Some bits I’ve fully laughed out loud at- have had to stop telling dh what I’m learning as he thinks I’m crazy so nice to read that you guys are also thinking all the supplements list was huge and that the part about trying to make a girl or boy baby was interesting :)

Sounds like there are more and more of us looking at ttc sept onwards which is super exciting :)

Xxx

@maloney123 my boss finally got back to me about that book she read, turns out it’s more geared towards trying to get the sex of the baby you want but I think it talks about general success methods too. It’s called Choose the sex of your baby: the natural way. Can’t remember if you’re reading The Impatient Woman’s Guide? There are loads of tips in there regarding timing, but on positions she just says some women swear by missionary with a pillow underneath their bum but others swear by doggy so she says if one isn’t working for you then mix it up!

Hi @StellaDelMare, you sound very organised! Have you been taking your temperature too or just the OPKs? I can’t decide whether to try one or a combination before we start TTC as I have no idea what day I ovulate. Or I might just try the “lots of sex” method from The Impatient Woman’s Guide for 2-3 months and if no joy will then try a more scientific approach!

@butterfly5291 and @mackjm20 yay to more bible readers! 😂 Butterfly I started taking calcium with vitamin D in a combined supplement, it says take 1 or 2 a day so I’m taking 1 as I do have milk in tea or porridge and eat a fair bit of yoghurt and cheese. I’ve read so many chapters already, only stopped yesterday when I got to the miscarriage chapter as I decided that was a bit depressing right before bed! The chapter about ovulation and timing sex blew my mind! I never realised how short a window there actually is for the egg to get fertilised! It was nice to see the table of typical number of months to get pregnant though and even into mid-thirties the average is around 3-4 months so I feel quite positive.

Another reason to feel positive, my DH initiated the baby making conversation himself for the first time this evening!! He suddenly seemed a lot more excited about it and said the reason he’s been a bit reluctant about trying when we go on holiday in September is because we’re going with my mum, sister, BIL and niece so he feels a bit weird about it. But has said he wants to take me away for our first wedding anniversary in October and he thought it would be romantic if we start then 🥰 So I’m super happy as he now seems on board with the whole thing and it’s the first conversation we’ve had about it that hasn’t ended in an argument or me in tears which felt sooo good!

@Lollipop87 @butterfly5291 it’s such a good book but the level of information- I still can’t get my head around how much there is to it!

I am glad i know all this now though so I’m not panicked if it take a while ttc.

I think we are going to use the ‘lots of sex method’ for a couple of months aswell and then if that doesn’t work start more with the tests and monitoring which sounds intense to say the least.

@MsQueenInTheNorth That’s my thoughts exactly try and keep it as low key and stress free as poss (inside knowing how unrealistic I am being about my future self just gave me a little chuckle) 😂

@StellaDelMare you sound so organised! Similar timings to when so many people on here are going to start ttc :) exciting :) x

Good Morning :)

@butterfly5291 and @mackjm20 and @Lollipop87 haha yes there is a lot of information and actually I think lots of it is irrelevant in the first couple of month as well :D I found it a bit harsh that she is so negative about the whole bmi thing (too low/too high) .. according to her I should stop getting fit because of my rather low bmi which of course I won‘t do. Cardiac and over all healthy benefits from sport are important at all levels of weight I think. Anyway I still love to read all the stuff it calms me and frankly it gives me something to obsess about in the waiting period -

just like talking to you lovely ladies ❤️❤️

@Lollipop87 AHH that's great news about DH initiating the conversation....and even nicer he wants to take you away for your anniversary. Would be very romantic to conceive then...does it fall near your ovulation period?😂

@Nate1 I haven't got to that part yet. My BMI is just over 25 and u probably could do with losing a couple if pounds but it's so hard when you're close to normal weight.
I'm loving having people to talk to too. OH laughs at me when he asks what I'm doing..."oh just replying to my new Munsnet friends" 😂

My Bmi is 31! I have lost 24 pounds during lockdown and I have just 5lb to go until I'm not obese! That's giving me a bit of focus and also helping stop me being tempted to TTC earlier! I am so excited about getting to be 'overweight' 🤣 I want to get my bmi as close to healthy as possible before December.

Morning ladies 😊

@Nate1 yes I think exercise can only be a good thing, it’s not like any of us are professional athletes (or are we..?! 😂) Maybe just take the opportunity to eat more of the good fats and carbs at the same time! And yes I know what you mean, I feel like reading up and getting prepared is a nice thing to focus on rather than impatiently waiting with nothing else to think about.

@butterfly5291 thanks! Well I’m not sure when I ovulate but according to my period tracker app my first fertile day would fall the day before our anniversary, so the perfect opportunity for lots of anniversary BD’ing 🙈 I told him last night that’s what people vamp it and looked at me in horror and said “well we’re not going to call it that” 😂 It was lovely actually, he suddenly seemed really interested in the whole science of it all (I forget he did biology at uni) - he suddenly started talking about follicle stimulating hormone, progesterone etc. and I was like wow, you probably know more than me!

It is lovely having others to talk to who are in the same boat, thanks ladies ❤️

@wrensandrobins that’s fantastic, I’m so amazed you’ve been able to do that during lockdown when eating more out of boredom is what most people have been doing! Go you!! 💪🏼

@Lollipop87 exciting!! Sounds perfect for ttc your baby :):) And how amazing that your OH is invested (hope that’s the correct term) and talks about it :)

@butterfly5291 Yeah I can relate .. being close to normal weight makes it hard on either side buuuut I can cheer you on :) And we can always ignore all the advice and just find comfort in being close to normal :D

@Nate1 yeah it’s like he suddenly got excited, I think maybe because he had an exam to do for work he could only really focus on that (typical bloke!) but now he’s passed it he’s ready for the next thing 😊

My BMI is right on 25, I’m at the max weight I should be for my height before going into overweight. I lost weight at the start of lockdown but then got fed up and started eating more unhealthily and drinking more alcohol (really need to curb that habit once my birthday is out of the way!) So I’ve got maybe 10lbs to lose, which I’m confident I can do before TTC.

I am not even close to a 'normal' BMI and I'm trying not to stress too much about it. I've spent pretty much my entire adult life trying to lose weight with varying degrees of success at different points and I've found it can be disastrous for my mental health if I get too fixated on it. Realistically unless it takes us a very long time to conceive, I'm going to be overweight when it happens, so I'm just focusing on getting plenty of exercise, cutting down on booze and trying to be mindful around snacking and what I'm eating.

@Lollipop87 good news on the conversation - I think it really helps to have a firm date in mind as the starting point. Ours is my husband's birthday in late September - all being well we are staying in the hotel we were supposed to be in for our first anniversary. If my predicted ovulation tracker is correct (which - probably not, given how recently I'm off contraception!) it should also be my fertile week...

@queenatom yes I feel a lot better now we’ve talked about it. Ooh exciting, will be great if it is! Yeah I keep trying to work out if mine will change, so far my cycle seems to be around 27 days but my period tracker doesn’t change it until you’ve had more than 3 cycles and I think I’m in my 3rd now, so keep having to deduct a day each month! Would be so lovely if all of us Sept/Oct TTC-ers fall around the same time, very unlikely but it could happen! 🤞🏼

just wanted to say that this thread gave me a massive kick up the bum to take some vitamins (I have been meaning to for ages)
A couple of days in and I have so much more energy - I think my iron levels must have been really low and going by google its looks like low Iron can cause issues with fertility!
I feel like I am finally taking charge of things and taking proper care of myself which is quite liberating!

@queenatom I have quite a way to go just to get out of the obese category (about 3 stone) I think i will have a party when I am just classed as overweight and even then it says I should lose another 2 stone to be in the healthy range.......it feels very daunting but I am going to keep trying to chip away at it each week and see what the future holds.
I think if you are taking care of yourself and getting exercise, then sometimes that has the desired effect with weight loss. Stress is your worst enemy. Stay positive

Thought I'd chime in on the BMI chat, my BMI is 25.4 or something, I think 25 is normal? But I'm making such an effort to get my 5 a day in that I find myself not having the biscuits and crisps ... and chocolate and going for the fruit instead. It's so hard though isn't it!!

My bf needs to lose weight, he's out on quite a bit of weight aince losing his dad. Nothing crazy but he has a belly and never used to so really trying to help him lose weight without him realising if that makes sense?

@JamesZebra vitamins are great aren't they :D I was surprised too. My mood is way better haha.

@sunflowersaremyfav93 My grandma used to say "Let them (men) think they are in control - that's the key :D"

@sunflowersaremyfav93 yes I think i could definitely encourage my boyfriend to lose some weight. He's really tall but carries it all on his tummy. It worries me sometimes however I looked on the BMI chart and he would only need to lose about 2 stone which is not a lot......he works nights and insists on taking absolute rubbish in with him. I think he needs to want to lose weight for it to happen, but it wouldn't take much.
My first job is to get him taking some vitamins which he is interested in now I said it might help with his hair growth

@sunflowersaremyfav93 that’s what made me put on weight 3 years ago, losing my dad. Funny how grief affects people in different ways, would have been better to be one of those people who can’t eat and goes super skinny but you can’t pick how you deal with it sadly and I’m definitely an emotional eater. My husband only has to eat the tiniest bit better and do tiniest bit more exercise for weight to drop off him, it’s so unfair! I think he’ll always be one of these lean types.

@JamesZebra I’m so glad the vitamins are helping, my mood is definitely better too! I’m off to my mum’s now to go in her hot tub and have a glass of prosecco, need to make the most of it before I have to go a few months without either!

@Lollipop87 it’s so nice that your DH is now excited too :) also so cute for your anniversary! Laughed about him not wanting to call it BD’ing! When I tell my DH about parts of the book he looks at me like I’m mad haha!

My DH like yours only has to look at a carrot to drop the lbs so unfair!

@Nate1 totally agree about a lot of it being irrelevant initially ! Also feel like you said exercise can’t be bad unless excessive :) However like you said passes the time :)

@wrensandrobins huge well done on the weight loss! Especially in lock down!

@queenatom @JamesZebra sounds like you are both doing all the right things :) I’m trying to lose weight too and have yoyo’d for years but I feel like every lb counts and all that so even if over the healthier the better :)

@sunflowersaremyfav93 sounds like you are doing all the right things. Totally makes sense and sounds like you are being so supportive by encouraging what’s best for him :) x