TTC after MC - June 2020

[SmileyT]

I'm 31 TTC #1 after a MC in March this year, AF has just finished and I'm on CD6 and all ready to go for my 2nd full cycle.

This month I will be tracking with opks, CB connected, BBT and following SMEP plan.

Thanks @VP91x I'm hoping its something like sciatica and chiropractor can help rather than anything else xxx

That sounds ungrateful! 👆🏼👆🏼

You know what I mean though - of course we should stay positive, and it WILL be fine, but when someone hasn’t been there it’s just a bitter pill to swallow sometimes.

Argh, I sound like a dragon 😂😂

@MichT4 it doesn't matter about Corona you are still allowed to be sad and grieve your loss. Make sure you give yourself to do that. ❤️

My partner is the same he doesn't like to talk about things or finds it hard. I'm sure the Ava will help hard it'll track your temp which is a brilliant indication of when you ovulated.

I've just been decorating or organising the house. This next couple of weeks it'll be the garden. Started repainting the fences etc.

But I have a toddler too who is very demanding. Although she's very good at playing by herself. Just have to set up a new activity constantly and fulfil her snack demands.

Have you done anything nice to occupy yourself during lockdown? Xx

Thank you for the lovely welcome. It’s amazing how supportive a few strangers over the internet can feel. I’ve had a little cry. A bit of feeling low, but mostly due to your kind response.

Just want to give a hug to those of you who have had recent, and not so recent, miscarriages. xx

@VP91x not really. I’ve been working throughout but from home so I haven’t been able to do loads to the house/garden. What an excuse!!
We moved into the new house in October so we can’t decorate yet 🙄. I really want to do the garden so we are starting to look at that now.

I’m into powerlifting so luckily I’ve managed to train a bit from home, when I can be bothered. Amazing how less easy it is to motivate yourself when you only have to go a few steps.

Lots of walks etc too but then my mind wanders again.

I’m a huge overthinker, I need a hobby. Am thinking of dedicating some time to really trying to get in better shape, so maybe I’ll make that a little goal to focus on

I bet your little girl keeps you nice and busy!

What have you done to the house? You might inspire me ☺️ Xxx

@NightDreaming I know what you mean, it’s lovely to have people to talk to.

Sending hugs to you too, and they are here whenever you feel low xx

@@micht4 dont be silly hun xx I reckon weve all felt the same at some point .. I know I deffo have xx

By the way girls, if you don’t already I recommend following Charlie Launder on Instagram. She suffered 4 miscarriages last year and is now expecting a baby in July. She fills me with all sorts of hope xx

@MichT4 welcome ! I'm sorry about your loss! I have noticed that MC is not linear process and we all hit bad moments. I think it is a part of grieving process. This is also what the chat helps me with. I wish you an awesome Healthy pregnancy !
And btw guys seem to go through MC differently. I need to talk to people a lot about it( for those who know), it helps me to process it and I try to somehow calm myself down.

I have also tried to occupy myself with organizing and decorating the house and garden like Collecting Multiple boxes for organizing bits and bits in the process ... seriously how many organizing boxes a woman can have ( I guess not enough). I have even ordered a metal organizer for cutting boards 😅

Thanks for tip @MichT4 i will check her Instagram

Thanks @HopeForRainbowbaby, I am really hoping June is the month 🤞🏼🤞🏼. I hope that for all of us 😘

You girls are putting me to shame with the organising. I thought my house would be the tidiest it’s been but it’s really not! I need some projects, and some boxes 😝

She’s amazing! She found out after the 4th that her body was attacking pregnancies like they were an illness. Just as she started treatment she fell pregnant and it stuck. It will happen for us all 🥰 x

@Hayleylou89 I'm sure no symptoms is a blessing although probably doesn't feel like that right now, when you see the little flicker of a HB next week it'll make everything feel better again... and yes he has started watching a load on eBay ready for if AF arrives next week x

@VP91x I'd say don't bother with CB tbh if you get a peak on ic then I think it's a waste of time, some people get the picture perfect 4 flashy smiles beforehand but if not I don't think it's worth the money, especially if you are doing SMEP xx

@MichT4 I'm so glad you've decided to join us ☺️☺️ I had surgery for my MC on the 19th March, 1 day before I was due to fly on holiday (flight was obviously cancelled) and with lockdown it's been shit not being able to get back to normal. I think we all understand how hard it is to celebrate other people's happiness when you are so desperately sad. One of my best friends is 36 weeks pregnant and just stopped shielding so wants to see me and although I'm so happy for her I'm so horribly jealous, not only for my loss but for the loss of the mat leave we were supposed to have together and our kids that were supposed to be 4 months apart. I somewhat luckily have been going into the office from one week after my MC and I've actually told the people I work with and have found it nice not to hide it and have some form of routine in this crazy world. Sending you lots of love xx

Hey @SmileyT

It’s hard isn’t it. I totally know what you mean about jealousy for both those things. I want to be heroic and be really happy and enthused but it tore me in pieces when she told me. Luckily, she’s totally aware of it and kept telling me she was sorry and that I’d hate her, before she told me what it was. Of course I don’t, but it helps that she’s sensitive to it.

Where were you meant to be off to on hols? That’s what I could do with now, getting away somewhere. Although it’s just thinking in new surroundings 😩

Remind me where you are in your cycle now? Testing soon if my memory serves me well? xx

@MichT4 I completely re done little girls room. We replaced the flooring and painted. New curtains light fittings etc. Have re done the dining area as well, now the garden. I wanted to get more done actually, but I got lazy!

Ah you power lift! That's so cool! I've been terrible at keeping up with exercise during lockdown xx

@SmileyT yeah I think I might just save myself the £30 and keep with the ICs xx

I was back at school today so feel like I have missed out on everything!! I have just tried to catch up quickly!

@Renna how is Shelby doing? We moved into our new house and my Bella is adjusting to life without trhe company of my mum and dad’s 3 dogs - I think she is a bit depressed even though oh is working from home at the mo!

@vp91x I have only ever used ic opks - I’m intrigued by cb though I have to say!! It took me about 2 months to crack the ic opks though and they aren’t rocket science..so it’s probably safer for me to stay with those 😂

I’m cd10 today - but having tried smep last month and seeing the oressure it out on my oh - I have been secretly starting my opks today - and I’m going to instigate drd over the next day (and every other day!) but I’m going to tell oh I’m at the least fertile part of the week so he doesn’t feel pressure! Apparently that can hamper conceiving as it blocks the hormones or something 🤷🏼‍♀️ He was super stressed by the smep, despite all the bravado and joking about how much sex we’d be having 😂 I think he let it get into his head too much, as we both desperately want it now!

Yeah @VP91x I don't think I'll be buying anymore as I've never had a flashy smile and always get a blazing peak for over 16hrs on ic so kinda pointless. I bought a box of 25 initially and they will see me through cycle 4 so I'll use them next month but not after that.

@MichT4 yeah I'd told my pregnant friend I was pregnant the day before my MC so she has been very supportive but it's still so bloody hard. And like you say, I don't want to be a complete dick and piss all over her time but distance has been good, her baby shower should've been 3weeks after my MC and selfishly I was glad I didn't have to attend it in the end. Was due to be going to Gran Canaria with the same friend actually... and I'm CD17, 2dpo will be testing middle of next week but desperately trying not to think too hard about it. I hope talking really helps you to grieve and you find some comfort in talking to us all xx

@SmileyT it’s already helping massively. I think I just needed to be able to talk and not feel like I’m driving people mad.
Thank you all for welcoming me so warmly ☺️

Fingers crossed for you xx

@SmileyT oh that's good that they've lasted you so long! I got through a box a month😳😳

@Bellabubble haha yeah the OPKs were driving me mad in general because I didnt expect to ovulate so late but as I do my BBT too I knew I hadn't ovulated so it's good to do both.

I'm going to do SMEP this month too but tempted to start from cd10 instead of cd8. Xx

@bellabubble my OH was so stressed by SMEP last month too. I think it was a mixture of that, and work pressures in lockdown but it was hard to see! We have a very healthy sex life anyway but I think knowing I was tracking he felt a pressure and couldn't 🙈 which has never happened before. I'm going to try and be much more relaxed about it this month and not let him know what my tests say.

Morning girls, and hi to @NightDreaming and @MichT4 it's nice to have you on but sorry you found yourselves here. It definitely helps to know there are others going through this.. literally everyone who has shared their story on here I have been able to relate to in one way or another. The loneliness of isolation and the coronavirus situation just makes the whole thing trickier.

@Nightdreaming hope you have a better day today. This journey is definitely full of ups and downs, be gentle to yourself- I think sometimes we forget that having experienced miscarriage we have all been through trauma 💗

Is anyone testing this week? Sorry if you have mentioned this before, fairly new to mumsnet threads and I'm not good at remembering where everyone is in their cycle 🙈

I only use ICs just because I feel like if I'm in this for the long haul and if I end up spending loads on CB tests it will just make me feel worse. Im not convinced that i ovulate every cycle so i just feel like they'd be wasted on me!!

@peonyrose87 and @Bellabubble the husband thing sounds familiar!😂 bless them..

Morning all. 9dpo today and I'm testing on Friday. Been out and bought my FRER and it's calling my name from the cupboard 🙈😂
Feeling lots of anxiousness and desperately want that second line. Worked out my due date would be 14th Feb too which would be ironic as i have always really disliked Valentine's Day
I'll keep you all posted xx

@peonyrose87 @Bellabubble
I tracked ovulation this cycle and didn't mention anything to hubs for that very reason. I was concerned he wouldn't be able to perform, as can sometimes be the case when he's under pressure or stress from work etc. I'please do the same this month if I aren't successful in a few days.

Just checking in with everyone, hope you're okay. I'm 8 days PO and got pretty drunk at the weekend which I'm now regretting. Determined not to drink as much this month!!

Totally know what you mean re the SMEP pressure, it felt blimmin' relentless at times!!

Good luck for Friday @Jazper, I'll be thinking of you!!

Thank you @WellHurrahAndHuzzah , have you got any plans to test?