Catching up - ttc after miscarriage part 2

[Annny27]

Hi ladies- setting up another thread so we can keep in touch :)

Hey guys
Sorry I went AWOL but I've been feeling pretty down and not wants to drag anyone else under with me so kept away from social media and WA for a while (also coz my Mum friends are all now preggo with their 2nd). As happy as I am for them its also heartbreaking it's not me.
Massive congrats @Sparkl I'm so happy for you, you deserve it after 6 months!

Fingers crossed it's your time too @Fizzl

I randomly started spotting a tiny bit and v slightly yesterday and literally a drop today which is bizarre! I MC'd on 1st April and only bled for a week so too early for AF, stupidly been googling and reading theories about ovarian cancer etc..
Has anybody else had this?

Yep its defo true that when you stop trying it works, happened to me on all 3 pregnancies although only 1 gave me my DD!

I've been pretty chilled this month and DTD every other day but I doubt it's my time...

Hi @melds22
Sorry to hear you're feeling rubbish it's the absolute worst journey and the ups and downs are unbearable at times and especially when ppl around you are conceiving left right and centre. I feel like that's all I see on Facebook and Instagram is babies or baby announcements. It's too much.
So sorry for your miscarriage too 😞😞
I had a massive bleed about 2 weeks after mine (not af) completely out of the blue and I didn't even notice until I went to the loo so think it can be normal to bleed on and off for a bit. I was told to expect it. I've never seen so much though when I had it I was shocked especially as I felt nothing.
That's good that you've been chilled though I'd love to take that approach but when we have we ended up DTD at the complete wrong time so our relaxed approach selves can't be trusted 😂

@MilsCookie I also always look at my due date cd1 - I thought I was the only one 😂😂😂 I'm really going to try not to test this month unless I'm late. Don't think it's this month though. I haven't got any and cos of lockdown it's harder to go out and I don't have prime (it's in my husbands name) so I'm really going to try.

Has af arrived @SunnySideUp2020? Fx for you that she's staying away!!! Also high five for giving up coffee. I don't know if I could do that. I mean I do have Nescafé decaf if I have another cup in the day and it's perfectly fine but just that end taste isn't the same. I had a few (maybe 4 maybe not 🤔) g&ts yesterday across the fence with our neighbours and I really didn't want to drink as I haven't for a couple of weeks - I think probably this cycle - but it's was so sunny and they went down so well. Even though last time I did conceive around xmas and was heavy boozing every weekend but still.

@Sparkl I'm sorry I couldn't see the picture last night, I've just scrolled back and looked, that's amazing news congratulations. I'm so happy for you .... after 6 moths of trying you must feel so relieved and happy. Xxx

Thanks @MrsLBear for putting my mind at ease! I wasn't aware this was normal, I keep getting twinges in my left hand side too but would be naive for me to think I'd get pregnant straight away when it took 8mths last time. My friend got pregnant the month she MC'd without even a period but I defo think some ppl are more fertile than others and my age is also against me.

Don't worry about the G&Ts, the more you relax the more likely it is to happen!

We aren't tracking either so probs DTD at the totally wrong time but I read that 85% or pregnancies are due to spontaneous ovulation so most probably why ppl catch when not trying.

I'm going to take some agnus castus this month and give that a try along with my fertility tea. Any other recommendations?

@melds22 I got my first af three weeks after mc, although it was heavy enough for me to think it’s definitely af. But I also had pre af spotting for a few cycles after mc too. I think it’s all a bit unpredictable but worth keeping an eye on if you’re worried.

@scrumdiddly123 @Ljm0101 thank you!
I’m already feeling anxious, I know you’re supposed to stop temping but I kind of wanted to make sure that it was nice and high and it’s not. Partly because I’ve been waking early but just so hard not to imagine the worst.
Anyway one day at a time.

@SunnySideUp2020 any sign of af?

Morning:) 9dpo and I resisted the urge to test because my tests have arrived now - I have written a deterrent on the box so that even if I am tempted, hopefully I won't go through with it 🤣🤣 ttc makes you crazy

@MilsCookie yep I check my due date every month too! How are you feeling 9dpo? I have slightly sore boobs but nothing else major

@scrumdiddly123 have you taken anymore tests to see if its reducing now?

@fizzl have you been tempted to test??

@Leok83 just saw that AF arrived. Sorry lovely :( such heartbreak to see those two lines and then it all get taken away again. Definitely lots of chocolate, alcohol and relaxation this week

Morning ladies!

@Annny27 hahaha I love your note to yourself! hopefully that stops you! I just have the usual sore boobs I get pre-AF and I've been having some cramps since Weds eve which feel a bit like AF. I do often get on and off twinges and cramps throughout the TWW since the mc so it's probably nothing. I've just realised my app says AF is due on Tuesday (which would be CD30) but as she's showed up on CD31 the last few months I wouldn't test till Thursday at the earliest. I'm so tempted already but I know how upset I get so really have to make myself wait!

@Sparkl I know it's so hard but try to relax and enjoy it. They say every pregnancy is different and just because we've had a mc before does not necessarily mean it will happen again. Since having my mc I know of quite a few people now who had a mc then went on to have their babies. Have you had any symptoms yet?

@scrumdiddly123 how are you doing lovely?

@Leok83 I'm so sorry that AF arrived what a horrible, cruel business this ttc malarkey is. Hope you're okay xxx

@SunnySideUp2020 thinking of you this morning and hoping AF hasn't shown up! x

Haha I love that @anny27!!!

Ah @Leok83 I'm sorry 😔 our bodies are so cruel to us sometimes. It's like we're being repeatedly teased. Look after yourself this weekend. Eat all the ice cream (I can recommend that Ben and jerries Netflix one at the minute 😏) and enjoy your g&t.

@Annny27 I caved this morning. BUT there was some logic to me testing. I had a few symptoms yesterday feeling a little sick, still getting cramps and my boobs have started to get sore (which hasn't really happened that much since my mc) and I woke up with temps still high. So this morning I was actually starting to get my hopes up slightly (don't know why because I have no idea what is normal for me with temping yet but the fact it hasn't dropped gave me a glimmer of hope). I had an internal debate for ages about whether to wait until tomorrow as I had promised myself. I stared at the test packet for ages...but then I thought if this isn't going to have a positive outcome like I'm starting to believe it could, I'd rather start preparing myself now.

And it was a stark white bfn. Not even a shadow of a line. No evap. I couldn't even force myself to see where the line would normally be either it was that negative.

So at least now I'm in the mindset that af will arrive (probably tomorrow) and it's on to the next month. And if for whatever reason I get a late BFP it will be a nice surprise now.

That's my logic anyway 😂 not that I don't have any will power AT ALL 🙄

Ohhhhh @Fizzl I'm so sorry but you're still early!! It's so frustrating that pregnancy AF symptoms are so similar and they trick us!! AF hasn't arrived so you're not out yet lovely. Keeping everything crossed for you xxxxx

Awww @Fizzl so sorry you got a BFN, nothing worse than seeing a blank test when you have your hopes up You're not out until AF arrives but at least like you said, it'll be a nice surprise now if you get a late BFP

@Leok83 sorry to see your AF arrived, keep your chin up and it will happen eventually. I have everything crossed for you and sending baby dust your way for a new and successful cycle 🤞

Haha @Annny27 love your note! That’s some strong willpower you’ve got there! As soon as mine drop through the letter box I’m straight up to the bathroom 😂
@MilsCookie thanks for asking, I’m doing ok.
I’ve just taken a test this morning and it was darker than it was a couple of days ago 😭 so looks like whatever is going on is still going on! Which I’m gutted about but just got to wait for my appt on Monday and find out the next steps. I did an opk at the same time and got a really strong positive but I guess the hcg is interfering. So frustrating!
Will keep my fingers crossed that AF stays away for you both and anyone else in the 2ww! X

Today’s test! This has been dragging on nearly a month now 😫

And today’s opk

@Annny27 love that note!! Stay strong!!

Sorry about the BFN @Fizzl 😥that’s rubbish news
Got my fingers crossed for everyone else 🤞🏻🤞🏻
@Melds22 I’ve had random bleeds after my match MMC, well I just have, I had what I thought was 1st AF at 28 days later, then yesterday was bleeding, bit more today so that’s 11dats after. Phoned EPU & they said normal & to note down bleeds if trying to track so I think it would be v difficult to try do OPKs or anything & ive no idea til things settle we will do same approach as you DTD as much as poss in case of ovulation then wait til dust settles.

🤷🏼‍♀️ I'm trying not to be too disheartened. We weren't actually meant to be ttc this month anyway, we'd said we would put it hold so it was kind of a bonus month! So if it hasn't happened, just wasn't meant to be I suppose.

My only worry is I kind of secretly hoped it would happen quickly like it did last time. The first month we put some proper effort in with opk's, pre-seed, raising hips etc it seemed to do the trick and deep down I think I hoped that because it all worked last time, it would work again this time. Plus we spent 3 months getting ourselves back on a healthy regime post-Christmas I kind of felt that made it a given that it would make it happen even quicker (😂 I realise how naive that sounds). I know it's only been two months trying so in the grand scheme of things it's really not long and I just need to be patient.

@scrumdiddly123 that opk looks pretty positive to me! It is odd though how your hcg hasn't properly gone out your system yet when your levels were so low. I hope you get some answers on Monday.

Not AF yet but it is a matter of hours as i feel it coming

@MrsLBear i know it’s hard! When i first switched to all decaf i hated it. I was so frustrated... some places don’t even do it 😕
But eventually got used to it

@Annny27 ahah love the note on the package! Well done you for waiting - so much better!!

@scrumdiddly123 the opk is defo picking up hcg so wouldn’t rely on them.
Hope that they have a plan for you on Monday as it’s really dragging now. For such low level of hcg not going away there must be something.

@Fizzl sorry you got the bfn so negative you can’t imagine the line. This is the story of my life now :(

Can I ask a very TMI question... as I mentioned earlier I started to bleed yesterday 11 days after last bleed which was 1st after MMC. Started red first thing then was brown quickly by 11, then basically stopped. Today bit brown now awful like black?? I did the pregnancy test 3 weeks after MC like they said, was negative so they think not retained products and it’s not smelly? Has anyone had this before? Am freaking out a bit. Not helped by the fact DS been being a bit of nightmare this morning & whacked me twice in the face & screamed the place down 😬

So AF arrived for me this afternoon 😫 it happens every time I do a pregnancy test. It's like it kick starts her arrival 😒.

That means another 9 day luteal phase I believe if she arrived at 10dpo? I thought it meant 10 day luteal phase but according to my apps because she started today on day 10, it makes it 9 days. Trying not to stress about that but can't help feel somethings not right.

Sorry @Minster2012 I can't really help with that one. My bleeding after miscarriage started back up around 10 days post surgery after pretty much stopping for a few days. It was red and then tailed off to mainly dark/old blood but didn't stop properly for 3 weeks. Not sure that really helps tho sorry.

And does anyone know why my temps stayed high? I thought I'd get a pre-warning of a temp drop this morning at least?! 😒

@Fizzl ohhh bugger I'm so sorry lovely 😔 so frustrating that you'd just taken a test! Hopefully you're not too disheartened as you weren't officially "trying" this month. The disappointment of AF is always hard though...sending virtual hugs 😘 I'm sorry I don't know anything about temps as I don't take mine... hope someone can help you with that though. Also I think your LP is 10 days cos I read that's it starts as soon as you ovulate... so if you were 10dpo, you'd count the 9 days (before today) plus the day of ovulation. Were you sure of the day you ovulated? Xx

@scrumdiddly123 oh goodness me you poor thing. It's getting a bit ridiculous now and I think if it was me I'd be getting quite grumpy with my doctors!! It's been going on for so long for you and I really think you need some help so you can start to move on!! I really hope the doctors do more for you on Monday! Sending a big hug!!

@SunnySideUp2020 still keeping everything crossed she stays away...!

@Minster2012 I wouldn't worry too much lovely, our bodies are bound to be a bit different after what we've been through. I was told my body might take a few months to settle down and get back to normal. All I've noticed so far is my cycles are a bit shorter than they were before (they've gone from 34-35 days to 30-31 days) xxx

I know they say you’re not out til AF arrived but my tests are stark white... and they’re ultra early ones so really now i just want cd1 to come!