35+ TTC#1 Thread 6

[BambiOnIce80]

Spring is in the air and it's time for a new thread!

Basically: a wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the TTC journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Here's hoping we get some spring BFP luck for all of us!! 🍀🐣🍀🐣

I had the same concerns as you about starting temping @QuantumGirl, but I've found that I tend to come around at the weekend at the same time as I do during the week so I just take my temp, log it and go back to sleep. I'm still getting plenty of lie-ins 😉

As for your CM/OPK/temping query, I've attached my temping graph for this cycle so far to try and help (although I dare say everyone will be a bit different and what's normal for me may not be the same for you). First off, I'm a flo app user historically but I think the basic fertility friend app is a bit better for temp monitoring 🌡️I get a little bit of EWCM for maybe 3 days before I get the watery stuff and my BFP OPK tied in with the watery CM on CD15. My temp dipped the day before that (CD14) and I think I ov'd the same day as my BFP OPK (CD15) because my temp shot up by 0.4°C the day after (CD16). I've had a bit of a lag with the temp rise this cycle (not sure if there's something going on different to normal there 🤔), but I've hit my usual post ov temperature this morning, indicating that there's plenty of progesterone hanging about now 👍

On the clinic front, when are you due to turn 40? I agree that it seems mental that a woman magically starts losing their fertility when our bodies tick over that particular mile stone, but the IVF success stats certainly make it look that way! 😕 That's why I'm not waiting another year for NHS funding - I don't see the point if it's way less likely to work next year or the year after 😔 I do have a low AMH success story for you though (albeit in a 32 YO 🙄). Someone I know told me she has an AMH of 3 and she's just had her 3rd and last fresh IVF cycle (she simply couldn't afford anymore than that, understandably). She had less than 5 eggs retrieved each time and none of a good enough quality for the freezer. 2 embryos transferred each time (which you can't have done after 40YO). She's currently 8 weeks pregnant 👍 I'm the same as you about not wanting to part with a huge chunk of my life savings for this (I'm still getting really annoyed about it 😞), but I think with a low AMH I'd go with sooner rather than later... definitely a tough choice to make.x

Thank you @Laney79 well I am managing with most but the stress I cannot control! I'm actually probably failing at the 'NO' drink rule too, I have no idea why all my plans seem to involve alcohol but they do! and even if they didn't I can't resist a wine on the weekend it's the only thing that makes me stress less lol. I need more will power with this one!

I completely understand your concerns @Laney. I would be the same I'm sure. keeping my fingers and toes crossed for all to be good and well. good luck with the scan decision, I don't think I could resist an earlier scan, but I guess it comes with it's pro's and cons.

I'm so sorry @QuantumGirl I pasted your name instead of @CNizzle in my last post. I should really stop replying to mumsnet on my phone or at least re-read my replies before pressing send (I am forever rushing).
I also apologise for my lack of grammar on this site. I am certainly a lazy writer and way to used to word and autocorrect doing all the work for me!

I'd say I am definitely the ditz of the group!

@AliceFF we are really close.

I'm sure I will be asking you all for opinions on my "symptoms" during tww. I'm not doing any type of tracking/temping this month but I'm sure it won't take me long to get on board with it. I'm currently feeling excited/optimistic to start ttc but I know for many it can be a long journey!

@Pastnowfuture It should be exciting but it’s easy to get your hopes up (I did last month and then af came) and I imagine it gets harder every month (until you get a BFP) so hopefully we all get our BFPs soon

Fingers crossed for a lucky summer full of BFPs

@QuantumGirl what unit was your AMH measured in? I can't remember you specifying and I know there are two typical units and it can make a big difference. If it's very low IVF might be a waste of time anyway and you're better off just trying naturally.

@CNizzle do you calorie count at all? I exercise almost every day (including running!) and mostly follow my trainers diet guidelines but don't lose weight. But if I actually weigh my food and calculate the cals with MyFitnessPal I actually consume quite a few calories. A bowl of porridge is full of them unless you have a toddlers portion for example. It's bloody ridiculous. Losing weight is hard. I have thyroid issues so get mine checked regularly so I know it's not that, too. I would insist on the blood test though, it's not expensive and they shouldn't be saying no. Throw in a few symptoms like lethargic and feeling cold all the time and then they really can't refuse. Conversely mine was overactive back in the day and I was manic - I kept breaking things and crashed my car twice! It was only when the tremors started that I went to the doctor and got diagnosed. I am now an excellent driver once more :)

Not much news here. I had my usual strong ovulation pains coinciding with a positive opk, sexy dreams, well timed sex and BFN. Five months till 40! Just booked myself a holiday to Morocco for it, flying into marrakech and will then either go to the mountains or somewhere else for a few days. Never been so if anyone has any tips let me know!

😳😳😳 ooohhh thanks for that @79andnotout I’ll check the AMH unit and report back tonight. Do you have any stats on low AMH and ivf? I’ve only have the lister fertility stats as all other clinics are based on age 🙄.

@BambiOnIce80 thank you for sharing your temping data with me, what do you think happened on CD11? I might join the temp squad too although I am very lazy and always running to get out of the door in the morning 🙈.

Thanks also for sharing the low AMH story, I gave me hope 😊. I’ll turn 40 in 18 months time and I’m inclined to collect 3 months worth of eggs before a transfer but like you said it might not be an option depending on the quality of those eggies 😟.

Anyway, it’s Thursday and sunny and I will be working from home tomorrow. I will treat myself to some milky bar buttons tonight (pls take my ‘cool badge’ away from me, I don’t deserve it). What are you ladies up to this weekend? 😎🤩

Hi @79andnotout, same here, another cycle another BFN. Morocco sounds nice, always fancied it, but not so sure about the bustle of Marrakesh, you'll need to let us know how it is. I use My fitness pal and am a serial (cereal)-weigher. Had blood results today, and apart from marginally high glucose (a non-fasting test after a toasted tea cake will do that!) And marginally low iron, everything is normal. TSH is 1.09, so well within the normal range, can't blame the thyroid. Had to have a repeat fasting glucose done today to prove the tea cake incident was just that.
Looks like I'm gonna have to either reduce my food or up the exercise. Urgh.
I have to look at it positively. I'm healthy, I just need to tweak my diet & exercise. On a positive, I've lost 4lb just cos AF is away!

@quantumgirl join the temping club, I think it certainly helps knowing when you've ovulated. I tend to get a positive OPK the day before the rise, but sometime 2 or even 3 days before.

@79andnotout I have been to Morocco a couple of times! Am personally not massively keen on Marrakech but the Atlas Mountains and also Essouira (which I have possibly spelled wrong) are lovely. Have heard great things about Fez too.

You are absolutely not the ditz of the group @Carley32! And I'm with you with the struggling to abstain completely from booze... hmmm lovely gin 🍸🤤😂 I am trying to go caffeine free once my decaffeinated green tea bags turn up today though (think it'll make bugger all difference, but I guess it shows willing! 😬).

I am very jealous of your holiday plans @79andnotout 😏 We were watching a wanky 'Netflix original' movie set in wine country a couple of nights ago and we agreed that if IVF is a BFN, then we're going to save like hell (to replace the funds that IVF has taken 🙄) and book a big blow-out holiday for my 40th next year (chileanwinetourchileanwinetourchileanwinetourchileanwinetour!!! 🍾🥂🤪🤪🤪).

I think at CD10/11 @QuantumGirl that was my oestrogen kicking in (it drops our temp) and gearing up for ov, but it didn't quite get there. The temp has to rise by at least 0.4°C to indicate ovulation (that's why the fertility friend app is quite good - it calculates the baseline and let's you know when it thinks it's likely you've ov'd with the 'cross-hairs', so you don't have to do maths! 🤓). Ovulation on CD15 seems likely for me this cycle because it ties in with the BFP OPK and temp rise the day after. The app seems to agree too 🌡️👍 If you do go for it with the temping and have any questions, just shout.x

Glad you got your bloods/results in the end @CNizzle 🙂

How's things with you @beverlymarsh?x

@CNizzle @quantumgirl I just haven’t got into the habit of temping. Tried three days last month - forgot altogether twice and then third day did it but forgot the temp (through T had a memory function but couldn’t work out how to use it!). Trying again this month but forgot again this morning before I got up to go to the loo 🙄

Must try harder...

Thanks @BambiOnIce80, you got the right day :). The counsellor was very kind. She said it seems as though I'm mentally overloaded and exhausted. She also said I am perhaps putting to much emphasis on doing things (like pilates etc) in order to feel better, instead to try and focus on what I need at that time. I was so tired when I came out.

Had another appointment letter today. So I am having: an ultrasound, hsg and a hysteroscopy with a follow up in September. So that's at least 2 months until my appointment follow up that we actually can't ttc. Not sure how I feel about that. Almost feel like I need to get this cycle over with. Would love af not to arrive and to get a bfp but if it does ttc will stop for a while and maybe that's what I need. Less than 2 weeks to go.

Am off today and a friend popped over with cake and flowers which was nice.

Hope everyone is OK xx

Sounds like your appointment was positive at least in some ways @VenusStarr It must feel odd not to TTC for two months but hopefully you see it as a positive thing / a step in the right direction and can benefit from having “a break” and that’s only if you don’t get a BFP in the meantime. Hope you’re having a nice day off.

I’m at the gym. DH was annoying me so that was just the kick I needed to get me here!

@quantumgirl this is what my clinic said about AMH

Chronological age is a simple way of obtaining information on the extent of ovarian function; however, it cannot always be used as a surrogate of ovarian age. Several recent studies, including some published research by my group, have suggested that a hormone called anti-Müllerian Hormone (AMH), directly produced by small follicles in the ovaries, is accurate and reliable to determine ovarian reserve. AMH does not fluctuate during the menstrual cycle and can be used to assess ovarian function in many areas of women’s reproductive health, including general ovarian performance, subfertility, polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) and premature menopause.

You have recently attended Centre for Reproductive Health in Daresbury for a blood test to measure the levels of AMH in your blood stream. You have agreed to be notified of the results of your test, hence the purpose of this correspondence.

Your AMH levels have come back at 8.1. pmol/L. Please find the reference range of AMH levels in different age groups.

Age 20 – 29 (13.1 – 53.8)
Age 30 – 34 (6.8 – 47.8)
Age 35 – 39 (5.5 – 37.4)
Age 40 – 44 (0.7 – 21.2)
Age 45 – 50 (0.3 – 14.7)

This is within the low ovarian reserve/fertility range of 5.5 – 37.4 pmol/L. Please note that this measurement represents your ovarian function at a specific point in time and cannot be used to determine the rate of decline. The results also have to be interpreted in the context of your age and any other factors which I am not aware of. If you intend to assess routinely your ovarian function I recommend you have the blood test for AMH repeated in 6 months time. This will enable us to plot the levels and pick up any significant changes.

With regards to IVF, apparently the AMH number in pmol/L seems to correspond with roughly the number of eggs you will harvest. That rule of thumb seems to correlate well with the results my friends and sister have had. No indication of quality, though, just the initial harvest.

That test was carried out two years ago now, I will find out what mine is when I have the NHS AMH test carried out at the fertility clinic next month. The AMH cutoff for my CCG is 6 pmol/L so I suspect I will not be eligible.

@BambiOnIce80 I have bought decaff, that I can do. Saying this, every time we are out and about I end up having a coffee and cake lol. this ttc is bloody tough going, so many rules. I wouldn't mind if I thought I was getting anywhere with it all. Oh and yea defo the ditz lol.

I am cd17 and think I may be in my window, although I'm not actually sure because my only symptom was a little ewcm (to much info). My opks are everywhere so far and the darkest line to date was cd10. so I don't know what's going on. feeling confused.

But at-least it's Saturday. Hope all you lovely ladies enjoy the weekend.

Thanks ladies for your thoughts on early scan etc. I have one booked for 29/5. According to my LMP I should be 6+5, by ovulation more like 7+3 so really should be seeing a heartbeat I guess. As several of you said I'd be worried that it would be ectopic or that the progesterone would've helped if I start bleeding whilst away and I don't have it so best to get it done and get the prescription. That said if it is bad news I'm not sure we'll go on holiday. I know how physically painful a loss is for me and I'm not sure I want to go through that away from home, especially in Greece where you can't put paper down the loo etc. Plus if there were any complications...so I guess we'll see on the 29/5. I'm not feeling overly confident if I'm honest. Had the discomfort on the right side last week then yesterday had some sharper pains on the left side. Trying to convince myself it's just things stretching and shifting but if I'm honest I'm scared s**tless. Haven't got many "symptoms" either...boobs a bit bigger and a bit windy on and off but I'm not peeing as often as I did with the previous two, and not as tired as I've been before. I really wish there was a way of knowing things are ok.

Still don't have the results of my AMH test either which I'm annoyed about. Consultant asked if I'd pay to have it done to speed things up (about £25-30), which I said I would. Had it done 18/4, but it wasn't back when we had our fertility appt on 8/5. Consultant gave me another blood form (this time on the nhs) but a) being needle phobic and b) not wanting to waste nhs money as it had already been done I rang the blood sciences lab a couple of days later and they said it had now been reported back. They aren't allowed to give results though. So I left a message for the consultants secretary to ask for a copy, and even tried my GP to see if she could access the result-but nothing! I'm loathed to pay the invoice when I haven't actually got the blooming result!!! We're not due to see the consultant again unless I miscarry, but if I do I know he'll want this result. So do I check with the path lab again and chase the consultant for the result or just bite the bullet and get the test redone on the nhs?.

@79andnotout holiday for your birthday sounds awesome, I'd like to go away for mine too. Not done Morocco but friends who have been have loved it.

@CNizzle your TSH is really good-fingers crossed a fasting glucose gives better results!

@BambiOnIce80 and @Carley321 yeah, abstaining from booze is bloody hard I have to say. But I do console myself with the occasional fake beer (0% alcohol one). It does get easier the longer you don't drink, but there are still days when I could quite happily take a straw to my litre bottle of jack and sink the lot.

In terms of temping I only did it the month I fell pregnant but I've attached my chart...I got a static smiley (clear blue connect @AliceRR ) the day my temp rose and only had one day of flashing smiley before that. As I say I do wonder therefore if I'm one of the odd ones who ovulated quickly after the LH rise.

@VenusStarr I find counselling useful if only to offload without fear of judgement or upsetting anyone. Sounds like lots of tests too for you. Is the HSG the dye/X-ray one?

Oh and @Carley321 if you are on decaf tea my tip for when you are out take decaf tea bags with you that you like-lots of the coffee shops don't do decaf or if they do it's posh stuff which I find tastes rubbish! I have a stash in my handbag!!!

It's OH 40th today, and typically I've got a rotten cold! So no birthday bonk for him with this snot/flem monster! We still haven't DTD seen the positive test, bit scared to. But then we didn't with either of the other pregnancies and it didn't help them so when I'm feeling better I'm keen to try. Maybe his spermies will have some magical properties that will help this one grow healthily (note to self: don't be an idiot! You know that's idiotic bollocks 🙄)

He's requested a chill out day in the garden so at least that's nice and easy!

Hope you're all having a good weekend xxx

Oh @Laney79 these things are just so frustrating, it’s just not what you need at the moment is it! I hope you get some answers soon. But I am absolutely rubbish with advice, so better not put my 2 sense in.

I’m glad you are all decided and have a plan for the scan. Sounds like a good one too. 🤞 that all is going to be fine for you and you have a healthy pregnancy 💗. Happy Birthday to OH!

I’ve not bought tea yet, but will get some in for that reason. Thank you. I hate missing out on my coffee shop fix, and there’s only so much hot chocolate you can drink.

CD18 and a beaming BFP this morning on the OPK. Managed to dtd Friday. Today is also on the cards 🤞. I hope this under 35 day cycle continues.

I know it’s so early and this may sound a little nuts. But i am entered into the pretty muddy race for life on July 6th. My question is, if I were to get lucky and fall pregnant. Would it be safe to do? Any opinion welcome!

I just can’t stop worrying over what I would say to not do it and what on earth i’d do after taking all my generous friends donations 🙈. Random for this page I know but it’s on my mind!

@Laney79 I'm hoping that things not feeling the same as the 2 before may be a good sign 🤞🏻🍀🤞🏻🍀 On the AMH result front, although the lab can't give you the result they can tell you which requesting location/clinician they've sent the report too (depending on the computer system they use, they should be able to tell you when it was printed off/electronically sent too). That should hopefully help narrow down where you should be looking for your result? I'd hold off getting it repeated - some labs have demand management policies and therefore might reject your repeat sample if it's been done in the last X days/months. Wouldn't want you going through the trauma of venepuncture to then have it rejected! I hope your DP had a lovely relaxing time on his 40th.x

Excellent news on the BFP OPK @Carley32! Sounds like you're hitting your window perfectly this cycle 😊 I would imagine @Weathergirl1 would be the best of us to provide advice about exercise and early pregnancy? Mine is purely based on what Charlotte is advised in the sex in the city movie when she falls pregnant - her doc says if she's a runner then she should be OK to continue doing short runs 😬 Possibly not the most reliable source of pregnancy related advice! 😂

@79andnotout I checked my results and I am definitely 0.7pmol/L and yes I have the AMH of a 45 year old woman even though I am 38 😭.

My appointment with the fertility clinic is on the 3rd of June and I can not wait for my verdict. I am totally freaking out and had a complete melt down on Saturday when I started spotting. Feels like I am sabotaging myself by thinking there is no hope for me, the ivf odds just aren’t on my side. I’m struggling to distract myself and sometimes I fall into the ttc black hole.

The spotting started the day after I started with DHEA so I immediately stopped it in case they are related and will ask about it on my consultation. I’ve also booked reflexology appointments for June and ordered a bbt thermometer off Amazon so I can join the club 😉. @AliceRR I can see myself doing exactly the same as you 😀

@79andnotout your birthday plans sound fab! I’ve never been to Morocco but have heard it’s amazing.

@Laney79 glad you booked your scan. Fingers crossed it will all go well.

@Carley321 on the running front I don’t know either, I think I would test test test. I’m in the same boat, I need to lose weight as I am getting a bit ‘rounded’ but I’ve heard when you exercise your body divert its attention to ‘healing’ the pain of exercise instead of focusing on ttc and now I don’t know what to do. Bikini body this summer is out of the window 🙈

@BambiOnIce80 loved the SATC advice, it really made me laugh 😂. Which CD are you on btw?

Ah @QuantumGirl that's shit. Although it's possible the test was wrong. My neighbour got a result of 1 when she was being evaluated for NHS IVF, and they offered her a retest, which came back at 6 pmol/L, so she could then proceed. Although it still didn't work (they are on round 6 now, and donor eggs).

2 weeks today then for your appointment @QuantumGirl! 🍀🍀🍀 I'm excited and nervous for you all at once! It's a really personal choice about how to go forward and I think nearly every single one of us would choose differently in the same circumstances 🤔 What's your gut leaning towards at the moment? I'd be the same as you if I started spotting having taken a new 💊 When I had the crazy short cycle the only tablet I'd started was Maca Root and I ceased that immediately (even though realistically that cycle was way more likely to be due to bereavement stress 🙄). Been taking it again for a few months and everything is fine - hoping your doc will give you some clarity on the DHEA (I have a sneaky feeling they'll say go for it and monitor you 🔮).

I'm CD25/10dpo, thanks for asking 😊 AF due Friday 😏 I've had an up and down week, in all honesty 😒 I've been quietly seething that my 'fast-track' referral appointment is nowhere to be seen - it'll be 2 weeks tomorrow since our last appointment and the doc said we should be seen within 3 weeks (yeah, right love 😕). Went for a run yesterday to calm down (which in itself might be damaging my TTC chances by the sound of things! 😩 Glad to hear there's another SATC fan amongst us though 👠 🍸😉) and decided there's no point ringing and chasing until next Tuesday when 3 weeks will have passed - they'll fob me off unless it's actually later than the date the doc said to expect it by 😒 On top of that, I've been having sharp right sided 'ov-like' pains on and off since 7dpo and my inner symptom spotting psycho is now in full swing 🤪😵🤪😵 Things just feel a bit weird and heavy/tight in the uterus region, but I absolutely know it'll just turn out to be nothing, like it always does (if it's anything it'll probably be a new sodding cyst because I pissed about with soy isoflavones for 3 months 🙄), and AF will be with me on Friday despite inner SSP attempting to get my hopes up 😔 And then I'll feel like a twat for getting my hopes up... Urgh. Can someone give me a strong talking to to help me pull my 💩 together?!

Well got a copy of my AMH result.

It says

Hello ladies! Exercise is completely fine to do, both in TWW and after a BFP. Emily Oster mentions the TWW and whether anything you do (drinking etc) would impact the chance of implantation - she reckons that as it's just a ball of cells at that point unless you do something extremely excessive then it's unlikely to cause any issues. The Athlete book I have reckons that you can keep going at the same level of exercise you are used to doing, but to adapt to how you feel and not push yourself to maximal effort (so if you race, that's fine but don't go trying to pass out as you cross the line).

I'd expect a 5k run to be fine to do shortly after a BFP but just make sure you don't overheat and keep hydrated. And listen to your body. If you don't feel up to it, then don't do it. Equally if you do, go for it! And if you start it and feel like you're going too fast don't worry about slowing down a bit. 👍🤞

@Laney79 your AMH is similar to mine but you are pregnant and that’s all you have to concentrate on! Just out of curiosity did you have 5 follicles in total or on one side? I’d be lucky if I have that many.

@BambiOnIce80 I’m leaning towards a 3 cycle but how we do it will depend on the results of the first consultation and scan. I decided to give my all and I am investing on it with reflexology, massage and I also would like to find a nutritionist that doesn’t charge the earth as £500 is ridiculously expensive.

Not long now until you test, the last mile of the 2ww 🤞. I know what you mean about nhs appointment delays, I’ve given up on them but then again it’s more like they’ve given up on me as I’m not even an ivf candidate in their books. I had asked my GP for a gynaecologist appointment to check my lack of periods and she said she would send a letter. 6 weeks later I received a letter from the NHS saying they haven’t heard from me yet and if I wanted to book an appointment online I needed a password. FFS, who manages this 💩? I just left it, it’s a massive wind up.

If ttc doesn’t work I will have a SATC lifestyle and fill my wardrobe with designer dresses and manolos and remind myself that at least they won’t throw up on me or wake me up during the night and will make me look faaaaabulous , darling 😎🍸. On the SSP front best thing is to listen to it, take notes and switch off. The only thing I’m upping a notch on is sex, as I think my body needs to get used to it all month long and not only on FW.

@79andnotout thanks for sharing a story even if it doesn't have a happy ending (yet). All I can do is wait and think positive but even that I seem to be struggling with recently. Just need a kick on the 🍑.