TTC First Baby Massive Thread.

[Delilah7]

Hope all my lovely ladies have found this group can't tag you all as there is too many!! ❤️

@sunshine1987 while you're totally right, I know far too many people who fell pregnant either immediately or without trying, or by accident.

@katbecool of course and there will be lots that do, I’m just trying to find the positive of that statistically it isn’t right first time for most x

@Delilah7 oh and temping actually gives you some peace. Don't see it as an extra measure because you haven't gotten pregnant yet , it's super helpful to temp.

@sunshine1987 oh no, statically it's not easy most of them. The circle of people I know just happen to swing it the wrong way haha. I know a couple who got pregnant with their first after trying literally once. Took them 8 months to conceive the second. The norm is absolutely not "one and done".

@KatBeCool you say that however my body never does EWCM after ovulation. Does it before and during which is how I knew I ovulated and fell pregnant last time. I'm going to DTD this week again just to make sure.

And regards to temping it's just not something I want to do right now. X

@Delilah7 well you're not losing anything by dtd-ing, your poor noonie though 😂

@katbecool haha 😂 swing it the wrong way. Yeah my best friend was the same, 7 months first time, fell pregnant second time after having sex once in the month when drunk, she just thought she’d come off her pill and start soon as would take ages, she was wrong lol 🙈 x

@KatBeCool it's just going to be a kebab after this. She's gonna hate me. 😂 I know they were negative btw but it's he strongest I've had all cycle so that's why I'm taking them as 'positives' in my case haha

@mrsc87 I feel exactly the same, I have actually been told it could take me a while, and I have this feeling in the back of my mind that it's just not going to happen for me. I'm gonna be one of those that takes a year or more!

I actually found it helpful to take a break from mumsnet. Although it's good to chat, seeing other people get their BFPs while I'm still slogging away onto cycle 6 can be disheartening, despite being happy for those that have bfps!

I also like to think that if it's not happening straight away, then it's just natures way of saying this wasn't the time, I would much rather have a healthy happy baby that took a year, than experience complications after getting pg immediately.

Are you young, fit and healthy? Are your cycles regular? Are you tracking with anything etc? Having regular sex?

If everything is saying normal, then chances are, you're fine, it will happen, and you won't care how long it took once your BFP comes!

The only way to know for sure, unfortunately, is time.

And we all have time :-)
Even if we don't like it!

@delilah7 that's def stronger. Maybe it is a bit mayhem since the MC, maybe just go with your CM and use that as your guide. Worked before, right?

@katbecool thanks, I def haven't missed it this cycle as it's still early for me and I'm doing OPKs in between the digital ones, but I think maybe I could have in previous cycles as we have stopped DTD the day after the positive, when actually ov could be 2 days after the positive!

Hi @Crossfitgirl, thankyou for your reply.
I am doing OPK's, lots of sex and would say I'm fairly healthy. Don't drink or smoke and although BMI a little high, I'm not obese. I think my diet is the only thing I could control a little more, cutting the sugar and fat out.
Cycles are regular 27-29 days. My only worry is the spotting for 3-5 days before AF arrives and period is light.
So far Mumsnet is helping as have a place to vent and talk with others ttc but if it gets too much will have a break.
I think like you it's just a feeling, and as you say the only way to know is time. I'm just impatient. But we all are, together and that's the key we are all wanting our BFP's
Sorry for being a moaner and thankyou all for your support 💕

@Crossfitgirl it did seem to Hun. Took another and it's weaker than that one :( my bloody cycle!!! Just gonna DTD the up until period I think 😂 how're you?

@Crossfitgirl one thing I want to mention about "if everything is normal", i thought I was fine, no unhealthy symptoms. And then my thyroids blood tests came in... I hope everyone got a full checkup to make sure of that normal. I'd hate to see anyone in my boat. Started my meds today! Never been more excited to take a pill haha.

I usually ovulate two days after the positive, as long as I catch the surge right away. My surge sometimes lasts over 24 hours. If I know I caught it right away (through addictive stick peeing many times a day), I for sure add two days. This is when temping helps for sure as I get a dip the day I ovulate.

And I so agree with you, I'd much rather have a healthy baby after a year of trying than an unhealthy one right away. Although I'll take a healthy one right away too!

@mrsc87 I feel like you have literally described me! We are similar by the sounds of it, I am regular 25-27 days, but have 3 days of spotting before my period and mine are always light too. How old are you? I am 30, I'll be 31 in December.
I'm the same, I don't smoke, only have the odd drink now and again, and my only downfall is sugary foods in my diet! I do have PCOS but I'm not even sure if that's a factor, given I'm regular and seem to be ovulating (albeit a little late in my cycle).

I think I am quite a stressy / worrier person though, I do get stressed very easily and so does DH, and I wonder whether that is contributing to this feeling in the back of my mind.

I also worry about being worried - I think that worrying about being a worrier will affect my fertility! and it then becomes a self fulfilling prophecy! Lol.

We will power on through together, it sounds daft but I think thinking positively and truly believing you will have a baby and it will happen for you, will actually make it happen.

People's mindset can have such a huge impact on their body, it's truly remarkable, I have seen it in my job day after day. I work with people recovering after stroke, and those with the positivity are always the ones that make the best recoveries, those that give up are the ones that deteriorate.

@sunshine1987 has got it all right, positive thinking:-)

Thanks for that @katbecool. I didn't know docs would do preconception checks unless you were having problems/ trying a year?
I will definitely go and get checked if I can! How did you come about getting checked?
Good to know about the longer surge. I may have to wait til next cycle to follow that through though, as if I don't get a positive tomorrow then I can't make sure we DTD 2 days after, as DH goes away again on Monday! May have to rely on his soldiers lasting ages inside me.

@delilah7 I am good thanks, I am a bit stressed about house stuff today but I'm having a chilled evening and having some nice comfort food. How about you?

@Crossfitgirl I'm 31 and 32 May next year.
Can I ask what the symptoms are of PCOS?

Yes we need to remain positive! It's good to talk to others though who feel the same.

Last month I was stressed at work and was turn stressing about being stressed lol. Thankfully this month it's a lot calmer.
On CD5 so not long until the FW.

@KatBeCool that's also good to know about LH Surge after positive ovulation. We don't DTD 2 days after positive opk so good to know.
I'd also go for a preconception check if I could....

I also would try temping @KatBeCool but DH's alarm goes off first at 5.30 am then mine at 7, so unless I wake with him every morning I am getting disturbed sleep until 7, so not getting a true reading of my temp.

@mrsC87 the main symptoms are
Irregular periods
Excess body hair
Being overweight
Acne

It's to do with hormone imbalance and I think increased testosterone plays a role.

I was diagnosed way back in my early twenties as I had very irregular periods between coming off contraception and going back on again, and i had an ovarian cyst removed when i was 16, but I never had any of the other symptoms at all. I just had a scan when i was getting the irregular periods and it showed signs of enlarged ovaries and they said that's what it was.

If you Google it there's plenty of info on the web, and other symptoms, but I actually think I just have polycystic ovaries rather than the syndrome, as apparently they're not the same thing.

Xx

@Crossfitgirl good! I'm ok apart from this cycle pissing me off 😂😂 I doubt it'll bring a baby so I'm ruling myself out already x

Re temping @mrsc87, you don't actually get up to temp, you're not even supposed to sit up. You could just reach for your thermometer and do a quick temp and go back to sleep.
My DH gets up before me and that's what I do.

But actually I have occasionally repeated it at my own getting up time and it's been the same temp. I've even got up and taken my temp in the bathroom and temp hadn't gone up. Personally i think as long as you're doing the same thing each morning i.e. not taking it when DH gets up one morning then later the next, it shoudlnt matter?

Just a thought anyway. Dunno how other tempers feel about this? Lol

@Crossfitgirl it wasn't a preconception check but a wellness check, it just happened to come up as I've been TTC. And I'm glad I did it or I would've never known that my thyroids needed help. If you go to a Dr and ask to do the blood tests to make sure all levels are normal, especially if it's been more than a year since last time, no doctor will refuse. My TSH was high, my vitamin D was low, my cholesterol was a bit high (Dr said it's most likely due to high TSH). I saw the results and I was shocked. I honestly thought I was super healthy. Granted vitamin D doesn't affect fertility unless you're super low, but TSH majorly does. Never thought it'd be me.

The other hormone tests were done by my OB though, but they mainly check estrogen, prolactin, etc. At least those were normal.

Now of course I made you think thoughts... Chances are you are healthy! Testing just gives reassurance, and, if anything, all of that is fixable but it's best to know sooner than later.

@Crossfitgirl temping is weird but it is consistent. I notice a difference between if were to take temp at 4-5am or at 8am. It's always higher at 8, by about 0.2-0.3. I just log both in two different phone apps. And both apps have a pattern. That's why they say to temp at the same time. If you temp randomly through the night, I can see a very funky looking chart. One thing I read elsewhere, if you're a restless sleeper, temping doesn't work well as you never truly rest.

Must be something in the air today.

I also feel I'll never get pregnant.

Only cycle 3. I know I'm being ridiculous. 😂

I had a preconception appt with my Dr, that’s how my thyroid problems ended up being flagged.

Looks like AF is on the approach for me