TTC after recurrent miscarriage - thread 3

[Miami81]

Hi all. Sorry I hadn't realised other thread was full.
Have tagged who I can remember.
Please add people in.
@AnneLovesGilbert @Labmum @Hopefulforourrainbow @zarala

I'm so happy to read your updates Anne, bean and Miami, it's wonderful to come on here and see good news.
I'm sat waiting for a call from EPU to see if my HCG is rising.

Hope everyone is okay.
I have my confirmation scan tomorrow, then i think they'll probably book my termination for over the weekend :( starting to sink in now...

Will be thinking of you tomorrow FMU.
Bad news for me, HCG is going down, will get a call from consultant re next steps tomorrow. Hoping this will be counted as a mc rather than a chemical pregnancy and I can be referred on to rmc.

Oh, oddsbobbins I'm sorry :( are you okay?

I’m so sorry to hear that @oddsbobbins, mine was counted so I really hope that you get your referral. What a week for you, take care of yourself.
Will be thinking of you tomorrow @fmu xx

Does anyone know if I'll be eligible for testing through RMC now? I have had 2 recorded miscarriages and numerous chemicals that are not on my medical records. However I doubt this pregnancy will 'count' towards my total, as I'm not having a miscarriage, I'm choosing to end it. (albeit with not much in the way of other options)

Oh @FuckMyUterus I have no idea, but has anyone mentioned testing/ the baby? When dd died at 27 weeks we opted for a full post-mortem which included the placenta and a full chromosomal check of baby. If they had found any genetic anomalies that could have been inherited they would have then checked us as well. She was our third baby after 2 miscarriages. The post mortem helped narrow our issues down to a placenta related problem. I think it's definitely worth you chatting to someone about testing. Have any of your miscarriages been checked for chromosome problems? I think you mentioned that you are on clexane, are you already under the care of a consultant/ rmc? I would try to get back to see them if I were you.
Again my lovely I really feel for you. Take your time with decisions as much as you can, I am thinking of you and your sweet baby always.

And also @FuckMyUterus they should totally count this pregnancy. You are making a compassionate decision for your baby and your family, anyone who thinks that this pregnancy doesn't count needs their heads examined.

I'm so sorry @oddsbobbins I think any pregnancy where they have recorded your hcg should count. I would be kicking up and almighty stink if they don't. I haven't seen any guidelines about chemical pregnancies not counting.

miami81 I don't mean count as in count as a pregnancy, I mean will it count towards miscarriage total? I doubt it very much though.
I'm only under a consultant due to family history of blood coots during pregnancy, he discharged me after issuing a run on prescription though.

@FuckMyUterus and @oddsbobbins thinking of you both and sending you both love. Xxxxx

Thinking of you both @FMU and @Oddsbobbins.

I started bleeding late last night- fresh blood clots. It settled a little through the night but I definitely think it's the start of miscarriage.
Just resting at home as husband has started new job this week and parents are away on holiday so not sure if I'll phone EPU and go for a scan today or not. Feel pretty alone right now x

@Munchies89 is there someone that can come and stay with you today so you're not on your own. Sending you lots of love xxx

Thinking of you @FMU and @oddbobbins.

@Munchies89, hugs to you. Take care lovely, sit with a cuppa, a shed load of biscuits and watch some trash TV.

Unfortunately not @Laura everyone will be at work and none of my friends have been through a miscarriage. Luckily I have my puppy keeping me company. Hopefully my husband will finish early once he tells his new boss x

@LabMum I've stocked up on lots of chocolate and biscuits and trashy tv x

Awwh that's nice you've got your little puppy keeping you company @Munchies89 hopefully your hubby will be home early. Lots and lots of chocolate sounds good. X

I'm sorry @Munchies89 hope you are as ok as you can be. I would get it confirmed though as you never know what's going on otherwise.
And @FuckMyUterus I think this should count towards losses total, they should definitely be offering examinations/ tests to understand why you are losing this baby, but also why you have lost the others. I really pushed for them to take my entire pregnancy history into account. This is a miscarriage you are having, no other way of looking at it, it's a much wanted baby that other then the complications you would be having it. It's heartbreaking for you, but I found that the only person advocating for me was me, if that makes sense. I pushed really hard for all tests. I know that the nhs is stretched but this is your life and your precious babies lives. My RMC had the attitude that my dd I had lost at 27 weeks was a 'success' in that I had gotten that far, I actually couldn't believe that someone said that to me, that someone could be that heartless. So I never saw them again and my consultant obstetrician took on all my care even when I wasn't pregnant. She organised all my tests and saw me around 6 times in the 9 months before I got pregnant again. I honestly don't know where I would be without her. If you can at all try to speak to the bereavement midwife (if there is one) to discuss next steps. Thinking of you.

FMU - thinking of you lots xx

Munchies - I’m so sorry. Glad you’ve got puppy cuddles. I’m currently snuggled on the sofa with our dog - frankly he’s preferable and less demanding than any friend of family!

@bean did you carry on taking progesterone when you thought you were miscarrying? The reason I ask is they don't want to scan me again yet as my last one was Monday and there wasn't a hb yet. So it's a waiting game to see if I start bleeding badly again or to see what shows up on the scan next week. I've never had a miscarriage before where I pass a lot of blood and then nothing- it's either been missed miscarriages or a lot of blood over a couple of hours. I know every miscarriage is different and it can stop and start.
Anyone else been in this position and have advice?x

Hi munchies. I did carry on but I got a scan within 24 hrs (and it was only 4 days since my previous one). I argued hard for it as because of ivf and recurrent miscarriage I’m taking progesterone, oestrogen and clexane and didn’t want to take them if I had miscarried or stop them If I hadn’t.
My bleedkng lasted around 6 hrs then stopped and was very heavy. They said the fact I had had no pain was positive as it appears that most mc are associated with cramps/pain. Have you got either? Hope your as ok as you can be x

Thanks @bean. Well I had really bad back ache yesterday but it was mid way up my back and that subsided by the evening. The bleeding then came out of nowhere with a tiny bit of cramping when the clots were coming out but then nothing much today x

Have you spoken to epau? When are they willing to scan you? Seems cruel to leave you uncertain as surely if there was already something you could tell if it was still there and growing or gone?

munchies I'm sorry, hope it's good news when they scan you.
Well, I'm no further forward. Scan shows my amniotic fluid has increased, although it's still very low. Baby's right kidney is multicystic with extremely low function, and they still can't see a left kidney, although there is significant blood flow to where it should be. Baby's lungs aren't nearly as developed as they'd like to see, however they're not under developed enough to need a termination by themselves. I'm still measuring 2 weeks behind too, although baby's head shape has corrected itself since last time and is measuring bang on. I've got yet another scan booked for the 17th. Just sick of the constant head fucking :(

Oh @FMU I'm sorry you're still in limbo, is there any hope for a positive outcome if things have improved a little?
@bean I decided to phone the tommys midwives that I'm under from my RMC as I find the EPU staff really hit and miss over the phone. I suppose I could phone them for advice or for a scan but not sure if I'd gain anything from it. If I had seen a hb then I probably would but as I hadn't it might not tell me much as I haven't bled enough yet for much to have gone....if that makes sense. I'll see what tonight brings. It's always typical that things normally happen on evening's and weekends x

munchies it depends what you mean by hope. There's always the tiniest chance, but the fetal medicine consultant who has done both my scans said that in 14yrs she's never seen a good outcome from this many problems.

A good outcome would require baby's lungs to fully form within 7 days, my fluid to increase almost 10 fold, and the left kidney to not only exist, but be absolutely, completely perfect and preferably rather large too. Obviously there's a tiny chance that all them things could come together all at the right time, however, being realistic its extremely unlikely, and more than that, I can't afford to hope, because the liklihood is that on the 17th they'll tell me my only real option is to terminate.