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Getting Ready For Baby Challenge - Thread 7

930 replies

HopefullyDothButterNoParsnips · 06/04/2017 08:21

We are a bunch of ladies who are either

  • humping (TTC)
  • by humping yet (waiting to TTC)
  • humped (BFP)

And everything in between!

We've had 8 BFPs since January (and counting!) and we love a bit of lucky lube and a squinter on 9DPO - come and join the madness!

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24
HbH · 08/04/2017 21:37

In bed too! Jupiter that quote you popped up earlier is SPOT ON!

Ah two weeks will fly by dancing and you can have the longest hottest soak known to man!

Just shared my name list with DH & he's totally on board with my top girl's name! He outright discounted quite a few (but when he said them out loud i could see they were a bit silly in context!!) Boys list definitely needs some work!

Tigger83 · 09/04/2017 07:02

Morning all thanks so much for your kind thoughts and words. Im finding it pretty shit at the moment it's really hard because I'm still carrying the baby I can't get any closure just get. The cramps are starting to get worse on and off.

It's the weirdest feeling, I said to the sonographer that I knew it was going to be bad news but it still kicks you in the gut when they tell you. The cruelest thing of all was although my boobs stopped hurting (which I should have taken more notice of I guess) I felt nauseous the whole way through, it was only Thursday afternoon it stopped.

Hoping to potter about in the garden a bit today but too worried to go to far from home in case it starts properly. I'm back to epu on Monday and I'm hoping I can go down the surgical route as at least then I might get the closure I so desperately need.

Work are being amazing, taking Monday to Thursday off then off for Easter.

I haven't cried any more yet, don't think I've got any more tears to shed. I'm strong and I will get through this, forever in my heart I'll carry a little space for my baby who was not to be.

I'm really sorry if I shouldn't have posted or if it scares people it wasn't my intention. I've had so much love and support from you all I just really wanted to be honest about everything as it might help someone who's going through the same thing. This is my way of drawing my line in the sand and after Monday I'm hoping that things can only get better.

I hope you all have a beautiful sunny day. grumpy I'm glad you're home safe and sound and the flights were ok, Jupiter hope you're taking plenty of time to relax to get you through the symptoms. Dancing para I hope my journey isn't dragging up bad memories for you, you're both such strong amazing women. Everyone thanks for the beautiful messages of love and support, I showed my oh and he was as blown away as I've been, you've made a hard time that little bit better.

Parastars · 09/04/2017 07:20

Tigger not at all, I found it so helpful to talk about it and still do, but only really chat to a very small amount of people in real life so this is hugely important. I completely understand how you are feeling and it's important we stick together! No bad memories...it is still shit of course, but I do feel better now than I did and I found out 3 weeks ago today. We have to be positive and try to look forwards, but we will always remember our babes ❤

Have a gorgeous day in the sunshine everyone. I was woken up by the cat, think she wants to go and play Smile

Penguin27 · 09/04/2017 08:03

You're a very brace, strong woman Tigger. I hope you're able to get the closure you need tomorrow so that you can start to heal and move forward. It's good to hear that your work is being supportive. Take care of yourself Cake

HeyJupiter · 09/04/2017 08:11

Tigger I am so moved by your post. Thank you for writing.. its was absolutely okay to do so because we care so much and so pleased you feel able to express those feelings here. I can't imagine the pain but so pleased your wonderful oh is there (and work are being supportive.) Have a beautiful, restful and simple day in your garden Flowers x

confusedat23 · 09/04/2017 08:13

Tigger you are strong hun you need to see that!... obviously it is going to be weird still carrying the baby until seeing EPU but whatever feelings you have own them!

No one can tell you how to react when you lose a child... and even though you have not met yours does not make it any less real or less hurtful as you and DF were Mother and Father from the moment you got your BFP

About scaring others please don't be worried!... when we all started on this journey together we knew there would be ups and downs and thats just what we signed up for... but just as we all love to scream and shout about the Ups we all have tissues and hugs ready for the Low times.

Symptoms are a hard one to judge at our stage in the race as they should be easing off... as the Placenta starts to kick in they should get better gradually and ease... my boobs have stopped hurting now too and trying to stay positive but i guess none of us really know whats going on in there!

❤❤❤

On a slightly different note... what is everyone doing today? I'm going to the baby and toddler show at Sandown Racecourse... i'm so so excited but obviously still causious... me and DH have agreed not to buy anything too big as we are not out of the woods yet... it was a hard decision whether to go but the only one between now and due date is in Birmingham at the end of May and i'm not sure if i fancy it atm... maybe i'll go with my mum if everything goes well at 12 week scan

DancingUnicorn · 09/04/2017 08:15

Tigger ❤️ I'm so glad work are being good, I definitely went back too quickly because I felt guilty about missing a meeting. I should have taken the whole week, without question. I really hope they are able to do the surgery on Monday for you and they look after you as well as they did me.

I feel completely betrayed by my body, as baby had been dead for more than a fortnight before I found out. Only the complete sense of dread I had before the scan, which seemed otherwise irrational, made me think anything was wrong. With hindsight, there were maybe other things I could have noticed. But the EPU doctor told me even if I'd gone for a scan every single day, there would have been nothing they could do. My husband said my body was just determined to cling onto its baby, which I think he finds comforting.

Sorry, I didn't mean to have a depressing moan. And hope talking about it doesn't make people more anxious. You are all such wonderful people, and have been such a source of comfort throughout everything. ❤

TheGrumpySquirrel · 09/04/2017 08:21

Big love to you tigger I can't imagine how hard it must be still carrying the baby. Hope they can do the surgery for you asap. Take care Flowers

HeyJupiter · 09/04/2017 08:29

Oh Dancing, the whole pregnancy process makes us reevaluate our bodies - the miracle of what they can do and then the inexplicable decision they make to do the opposite. I know you feel so let down by yours right now.. but it tried so hard. Even if you had noticed something had changed, the outcome would have been the same. The singer Tori Amos once described miscarriage as very "thief in the night" - unexpected, not always overt. That's always stayed with me. You're so brave my lovely. We're all here xx

I'm going to spend today sitting by a beautiful river enjoying the sunshine. Am trying to practice mindfulness at the moment (given we advocate it so much at work!) and try and live in the moment a bit more.

HeyJupiter · 09/04/2017 08:30

Hope you had a lovely long sleep grumpy

Have fun at the baby event confused, can't wait to hear all about it :)

Penguin27 · 09/04/2017 08:34

Dancing ❤️ I have no words xx

I plan to spend as much of the day enjoying the sun as possible, whilst also doing all the usual household-y stuff I have to do on a Sunday! I feel like I always miss the sun, usually I'm stuck at work or otherwise busy with indoor stuff 😕

HbH · 09/04/2017 08:35

Lovely words at such difficult times Tigger, & dancing they made me well up... not in a way that they shouldn't have been said... really appreciate your honesty. Your OHs sound like absolute rocks, so important x

Hope today goes quickly for you Tigger & EPU come through for you tomorrow... all the hugs x

HbH · 09/04/2017 08:40

Mindfulness sounds like a great plan Jupiter i was thinking of looking into something (never needed it before) but when i go to the loo in the night i seem to be awake for up to a couple of hours worrying/frustrated i can't sleep! Need some sort of meditation i think!

Enjoy the babyshow confused do you buy stuff or just get ideas?

HeyJupiter · 09/04/2017 08:57

Oh Hb I'm exactly the same! Keep going to the loo at about 4:45 and then can't get back to sleep before alarm at 6:45. There are some guided relaxation videos on YouTube that you can then recreate at those times. Lots of stuff about finding your 'safe place' which I like.

How are our two week waiters? Any symptoms orange and mummy?

MrsC2017 · 09/04/2017 09:07

tigger and dancing both of you are amazing, you have both been so honest and like para has said getting it out helps, that's what this group is for, the highs and the lows of which there will be both, the lows can't be prepared for or seen before they happen and symptoms come and go and nobody is an expert at this including our own bodies who may still think everything is OK when it's not. I hope Monday brings some closure tigger and then it's just a case of time doing what it does anyway, helping you move forward without ever forgetting, big love to you 3 amazing strong women xxx.

buzzmoon · 09/04/2017 09:14

tigger, dancing and para you are incredible ❤️ I'm so moved by your words, I hope it has helped sharing and please don't ever feel like you can't cause we're all here for it all, no matter what ❤️ hope you enjoy the sunshine today, I'll also be in the garden tigger planting more and definitely thinking of you. I'll be planting 3 sunflowers today, one for each of you, I hope that's okay 🌻

Have fun at the baby show confused

jupiter and hb I'm having such weird dreams at the moment, they keep waking me up!

HbH · 09/04/2017 09:21

Oh Buzz that's so lovely re. the sunflowers ❤

How you feeling MrsC? Hope the nausea is calming? Have you got a scan today or have I remembered all wrong?!

Seven0fNine · 09/04/2017 09:21

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Crying now after catching up this morning (but in a good way) glad we are all here to share your journeys and support each other as we go xx makes this whole thing much easier to handle.

But on the other hand....

God dammit! I forgot to test with fmu!! Halfway through a sleepy wee at 5.30am and then remembered. No symptoms of being pregnant tho so doubt I am (hope not I've been drinking like a fish..taking the drink til it's pink to heart)

For whoever asked...(dancing maybe?) I think I remember reading somewhere if you take too much folic acid then your body just takes what it needs and gets rid of the rest. But I may be making that up xx

Tigger83 · 09/04/2017 09:22

Buzz that's gorgeous thank you Flowers

Original poster
HopefullyDothButterNoParsnips · 09/04/2017 09:24

Oh tigger what beautiful words. I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you at the moment. You're doing so well. Just take each day as it comes.

Can I just say how lovely this thread is. It's so weird to be sharing so much with people we've never met but I do genuinely feel like we're friends (sounds weird I know). I've felt genuinely affected by everyone's news when it happens - whether sad or happy.

I'm glad you're all here xxx

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Original poster
HopefullyDothButterNoParsnips · 09/04/2017 09:25

Ps happy to share insta details but I don't know how to pm?!

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MrsC2017 · 09/04/2017 09:46

hb yes it's this afternoon, we'll remembered! Unfortunately I think I have a sinus infection or something, my head is pounding and pressure behind my eyes and nose, my throat is red raw, has the sweats all night too, going to go to gp tomorrow, apparently lemsip and strepsils can't be taken, so I'm finding it hard to think about the scan as I'm just feeling sorry for myself! I feel like I'm always complaining too which I hate, I'd say DH wants to choke me although he's being very nice I'm sure in his head he's like "I wish she would shut it" 😂 😂! Anyway I need to shake myself and just get on with it!

buzzmoon · 09/04/2017 09:54

parsnips and grumpy I've sent you a PM but no idea if it's worked!

mrs good luck today! I'm really nervous about drinking all the water before and wetting myself 😂

MrsC2017 · 09/04/2017 09:55

Haha buzz I know, she said full bladder in the phone and all I could think of was that I don't know when my bladder was last empty anyway!

HbH · 09/04/2017 09:55

Moan all you want babe! Its rubbish to be ill and not be able to take the usual remedies (encountered this with hayfever on hol!) im sure you're entitled to all the moans to DH for at least nine months!! He just got a shag... you have to do all the hard work!!

Hope the scan goes well x