Age 38 TTC for 1 year...what next?

[ohbigdaddio]

Hello lovely people,
DH and I have been ttc for nearly 12 months and haven't had a BFP. I am 38 (never been pregnant) and although I started off feeling really positive and relaxed, the months of disappointment have added up and I am now pretty low and verging on becoming depressed. I do have a history of depression so need to watch out for this.
I've had blood tests to check ovulation which came back normal and DH had sperm test, also fine.
My question is what do we do next? Are there further investigations I could have? If it wasn't for my age I would be more relaxed about it all I'm sure, but I feel so worried. The disappointment of AF a few days ago has knocked me badly and I feel unable to enjoy anything really. I'm lucky to say I have a lovely DH and a very nice life really, but now that the focus is on TTC, everything else seems pointless and the future seems very bleak. Again I do recognise that I could be becoming depressed.
Friends have told me to relax (I don't know how to!) and forget about it for a while but I feel I have a time limit and can't put it on hold, especially if we need medical help with conceiving.
Thank you for reading. Any advice would be much appreciated x

I hate it when people tell me to relax and it will happen! Grrr!
While it's good news that you are ovulating and that DH's SA is normal, now is probably the time to get some more tests done.
When you had your ovulation blood test done, did you also have a check of your FSH / LH and oestrogen levels? These are other baseline blood tests done by the GP, which can be useful and give you an idea of your egg reserve. You may find this helpful for a list of the tests which may be useful: www.conceptionadvice.com/fertility-tests/
Otherwise the next step would be a referral to a fertility clinic so that they can check your tubes are open and get the ball rolling if you were to need further treatment...
Good luck x

I know emmag, several friends have just told me to relax and it will happen. I know they're trying to help but it doesn't help!
I had 3 blood tests and they were all normal, they were to check I was ovulating, done at different times in my cycle. GP didn't mention anything about my egg reserve. Is it worth going private for these tests or is the NHS fairly quick to react? Can't really afford to go private but I'm worrying about time...
Can you tell I'm a massive worrier? I'm sure that's not helping!
Thanks for the link, will have a read.

I suggest you make an appointment with GP and asked to be referred to fertility services locally for further tests. This could be a gynaecologist or infertility clinic. See how long the wait is and what is offered in your CCG in terms of treatment. Good luck.

Thank you JeNeBaguetteRien It's all quite daunting but I guess I just need to get on with it. x

Hi ohbigdaddio

I'm also 38 and been TTC for over 1 year.

I've had 3 chemical pregnancies (basically a very early miscarriage around time AF would have been due).

Tests I did on NHS (had to push GP to do them!):

When you do tests ask for print out of results.

Thyroid TSH
needs to be under 3.5, ideally between 1-2 for TTC

Progesterone
needs to be above 30 to show ovulation

LH Hormone
needs to be between 2-12, the lower the better

FSH Hormone
test on day 1 of cycle
needs to be between 3-12, the lower the better

Lining of womb
needs to be between 10-13mm on day 21

Have internal scan to count antral follicle count and check for fibroids/polyps etc

Male tests for concentration, mobility and shape

Clotting tests for Antiphospholipid syndrome (APS)

My tips to get pregnant:

Use clear blue fertility monitor

Conception supplements

Wild salmon fish oils

Ubiquinol (doc said women above age 35+ should take these to improve egg quality)

Daily baby low dose aspirin 75mg

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/science/science-news/11943048/Aspirin-a-day-could-boost-chance-of-having-a-baby.html

Green tea and lots of water for EWCM

No caffeine, gluten, sugar, alcohol, strenuous exercise in 2 ww

And the best advice I received re trying to get pregnant

"don't feel bad if you want to punch someone in the face when they tell you to just relax and then it will happen"

Hi user Thanks for your long reply and advice. Are you TTC #1 too? It's so hard, isn't it? I recently found out a friend of my DH's is pregnant with her 3rd...and it was an accident! Hearing that sent me reeling, especially as it obviously happened whilst we were TTC! It's so hard not to be affected by other's situations and just focus on yourself.
But this advice is much appreciated. I'll get to my GP asap.
Strenuous exercise is a tough one – I exercise 3 times a week at an outdoor bootcamp and have done for the last 3 years or so...would this count as strenuous, or as I am used to it would it not? It's definitely tough and very full on/exhausting!
Have your tests revealed anything? Hope you (and everyone on here!) get a BFP soon.

Hi ohbigdaddio

Yes we are TTC for #1 and still hopeful.

I also do a First Response test early every month (5 days before AF) because a lot of women have chemical miscarriages and never know about them unless they test. I think its good to do this test early because they you will know if it happened or not.

If I didn't do these early FRER tests I probably would never have know about the miscarriages and then the doctor would never have done the fertility tests!

All of my friends around me are either falling pregnant or just giving birth. Its hard.

I do gentle exercise in 2 ww like yoga, pilates, swimming, brisk walking on treadmill etc I follow the same advice that women are given when they do IVF and are in the 2 ww.

If your body is used to doing this bootcamp stuff maybe its OK to do it in 2 ww?

Good luck user hope you get a BFP soon.

I didn't know about chemical miscarriages until now. Don't think I've had one though.

My full sympathies with you, I know what it's like, lots of people are pregnant and I dread the 'what about you?' questions!

Maybe I'll take it a bit easier in the 2ww though I've not really read about why you need to?