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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

TTC for 10 months and the rest. Ten plussers welcome. Thread 2.

987 replies

lucieloos · 07/10/2015 11:21

We have been so busy chatting I've started a new thread. Welcome all 10+ ladies. Hope we all have some luck on this thread.

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loopylou1984 · 10/10/2015 21:56

Ouch Sali, you poor thing. Rest up, and you'll be back on your feet in no time. Is this your 1st you're trying for? Xx

loopylou1984 · 10/10/2015 21:58

Ohsnd are you wanting to get IVF privately as well? Xx

Salimali15 · 11/10/2015 09:54

Yes, our 1st. I've been advised that in our area, we can have 3 private attempts and still be eligible for NHS - pretty good, I think? So we're thinking to give it until Christmas and then start the ball rolling privately.

Original poster
lucieloos · 11/10/2015 10:04

Whereabouts do you live sali? Is it Wales by any chance?

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Salimali15 · 11/10/2015 10:19

Yes, Cardiff.

Original poster
lucieloos · 11/10/2015 10:26

Me too, I don't think that's correct about 3 private attempts. You are entitled to 2 free attempts on the NHS. The waiting list is currently around 18 months to 2 years though so if you aren't on it already then I would get on it quick. I have been on it for almost a year now and haven't had my initial consultation yet. You are entitled to one attempt privately which won't affect your NHS attempts, however if you have 2 attempts privately then you will only be eligible for one attempt on the NHS and if you have 3 attempts privately you are not entitled to anything on the NHS. That's my understanding of it anyway.

We have got around this by having treatment abroad. It's a lot cheaper and the NHS are none the wiser Smile

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Salimali15 · 11/10/2015 10:51

I'm on the waiting list for an initial consultation. I was told the waiting list is 6 months, so perhaps the lady I spoke to was telling porky-pies?!?!

Whereabouts are you having your treatment abroad? Would you recommend?

Original poster
lucieloos · 11/10/2015 11:55

Yes I don't think it's 6 months hun, the IVF Wales is in an awful state at the moment!

I'm having treatment in Czech Republic. I was looking for treatment abroad and they stood out as they have great success rates and the prices are way cheaper than uk. We pay less than £1500 for a cycle including ICSI. It's all very easy. I'm doing embryo banking at the moment so doing a few cycles and saving up any embryos that make it. We have a forum over on fertility friends if you want to find out more. The clinic is called reprofit.

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Itsme247 · 11/10/2015 20:40

Hi ladies, I've been on and off this bus for a while but have been for our first meeting at the fertility clinic. I have high prolactin levels and DH has low motility , the doctor was a bit odd if I'm honest and said that as long as long as I have a period every month and my DH has at least some sperm , there is a likliehood we can get pregnant but in the same breath said if nothing happens ire the next few months, come back in April for our (one and only Nhs funded ) round of ivf!!!! Does that sound right? Surely there are other steps to take before ivf?

Original poster
lucieloos · 11/10/2015 20:46

Hi itsme, how long have you been trying for? It sounds about the same as happened to me really. I went privately for all my blood tests which were ok. Dh has low motility and they said we wouldn't be suitable for iui as a result of this. The doctor didn't think it was worth me having a hysteroscopy or anything like that as no indications that anything would be wrong so basically said try for another 6 months and if nothing then come back and begin ICSI. Nothing happened so we went back and have now just finished another treatment.

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Itsme247 · 12/10/2015 07:03

We've been trying for 18 months, although I had the implant taken out almost 3 years ago (we were just careful around the middle of the month)

It's just so stressful having to decide as a couple how far we are willing to go, only one nhs funded round seems really low chance to me but there's no way we could afford more than one private ivf treatment :(

And even more difficult, if we are unlikely to become parents, and the ivf fails, then we will pursue a different kind of life together . Sell the house we worked hard to fill with children, and maybe do something else- travel, take up our passions without concern of being irresponsible... But we can't even do that because there is this slim hope that one day , after we've sold everything that's baby friendly and were in the middle of nowhere with a campervan to our name, that I might miraculously get pregnant...

Which would be absolutely awesome but I'll have nothing left to raise he/she how I am planning to now!!!

Has anyone thought of life after maybe not having a baby? Or is that just pointless waste of mental energy. I suppose I want to come to terms with that first, to save any disappointment with the treatment :(

Original poster
lucieloos · 12/10/2015 07:29

Aww itsme, I know it's hard, I have thought of life without children and thought should I give it all up and go travelling with Dh but I don't know. I couldn't imagine a life without children. I'm having treatment abroad at the moment to save money on costs. Have you thought about that? What would have cost us about £5k per time in the uk now only costs us £1500 so we can afford a few more tries. I think if it came to the worst and it still wasn't working for us we would look into donor egg or even double donor (egg&sperm) A lot of people have it at the clinic I'm at and the success rates are very high. It just means coming to terms with the fact that the baby wouldn't have your DNA which some find easier than others but there are ways.

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Itsme247 · 12/10/2015 07:40

I think abroad would be the way to go, do you find it more stressful having to book flights/time off etc?

Using donations is a route we won't go down for various reasons, but would look to foster later in life when the possibility of having our own is out of the question.

Original poster
lucieloos · 12/10/2015 08:06

I don't really know if it's more stressful as its the only way I've done it. I find it fine and in some ways I think maybe it's easier as I treat it as a mini holiday and seeing and doing new things kind of takes my mind off it all a bit. The first time I went for around a week and that included egg collection and transfer but now I am doing embryo banking so saving up any embryos we get from each collection and having them transferred at a later date. I went out last week for my egg collection and only stayed one night and came home the next day so it's fairly easy for me to organise around work etc at the moment. Flights and hotels are very straightforward so no problems there.

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Original poster
lucieloos · 12/10/2015 13:53

Not good news from my day 3 results today. We have one embryo at 7 cells and the other at 4 cells. Last time at this stage we had a 9 cell and a 4 cell which both somehow miraculously made it to freezing on day 5 but I just feel really disappointed. At least last time I felt the 9 cell was doing quite well but it just doesn't look good at all now. So fed up and really don't know what to do next.

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Stace2015 · 12/10/2015 14:05

Hi all, how are we doing?

My husband had is semen analysis today and i have my ov bloods on Wednesday, hoping for some definitive answers finally! Been dtd every other day this cycle but haven't had an indication that im ovulating this month.. usually get cramps, egg whites cm etc.. but nothing!? Feeling a little confused

loopylou1984 · 12/10/2015 20:03

Have missed a whole chunk so will read back later but Lucie, both of those could still make it based on last time, don't give up hope!

And Stace - good luck with your test results. No symptoms doesn't mean no ovulation, our bodies like to play tricks on us. Xx

Original poster
lucieloos · 13/10/2015 13:38

Thanks Sammy, the waiting is awful! I really don't feel hopeful and don't know what to do next if we don't get any. Dh is going to ring for me tomorrow.

Good luck with your results stace.

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Stace2015 · 13/10/2015 13:58

Thanks ladies! Appreciate it Smile x

Trixielilac11 · 13/10/2015 16:57

Lucie, I'm not sure, it would be easier to do a FET for our NHS go but after having lost 2 embryos already I think I would prefer to save the ones we have for a sibling in the future if necessary and do another fresh cycle now, though we may well change our minds. It's really hard!
Good luck for tomorrow, will check in for your update. I know the waiting is hard but try and stay positive - FX!

Hi Salimali, we are also unexplained - so frustrating. I hope you have recovered from your HSG now.

Great news that you don't have to wait Sammy. I hope AF arrives on time and your clinic can fit you in.

Hi Itsme, the thought that it may never happen for us has crossed my mind over the last few months but I just cannot picture a life without children. I am very maternal and I'm not sure I would ever give up hope. There is every chance that you will conceive naturally.

Good luck with your results Stace. Hopefully you have oved but bear in mind it is perfectly normal to have the occasional annovulatory cycle (I'm sure I've had a few since I started TTC)

AF arrived on Saturday so I am onto cycle 23. DH and I are trying to keep busy and take our minds off TTC. We are looking into a mini break between Xmas and New Year so have been looking into destinations/flights/hotels etc.

Original poster
lucieloos · 13/10/2015 17:32

Trixie that sounds a lovely idea about a mini break between Xmas and new year! I fancy doing that too. I haven't had a holiday at all this year. Let me know if you find anything good.

I think that's a good idea keeping your frosties for a sibling if you don't have to wait too long for your NHS attempt.

Thanks for the good luck wishes. DH will be ringing at midday so will update you shortly after that.

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Original poster
lucieloos · 13/10/2015 17:34

Also trixie I don't think you can use your frosties from a private cycle on an nhs attempt. They make you start from scratch again or they do in my area. Doesn't make sense really.

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loopylou1984 · 13/10/2015 18:22

Trixie - planning a trip sounds great. It's so important to still do things for you. All too easy to let ttc struggles become the only thing in your life.

Lucie - will be checking in for your update, everything crossed for you.

It's the same in my area re. Frosties. You can't use private frosties for a nhs go. It's totally ridiculous, costing them unnecessary money!

Af arrived on Sunday for me and the clinic have booked me in for a scan Thursday and all being well we'll be good to go this cycle! Eeek! Xx

Itsme247 · 13/10/2015 22:29

Thanks for the advice all, good luck everyone that's on the IVF journey this month.

AF arrived for me this morning, miserable as ever. Giving it all we have for the next 6 months, one round of IVF and then I'm out for a while! I can't keep chasing a dream, it's exhausting. Keep it up everyone, your determination is inspiring!

Trixielilac11 · 14/10/2015 10:14

Fresh cycle it will be then! As much as I had a good experience with my private clinic (except for the BFNs!) NHS may be easier because we'd be at Kings College which is a really good hospital and literally a 10 min walk from my office so would be really easy for scans etc.

I think we're looking at South Spain for our Xmas break, I'd love to go a bit further afield but DH isn't keen on flying too far. Should still be a good 10 degrees warmer than the UK.

Sorry for AF Itsme, sounds like a good plan, I think having a plan helps.

Not long to go now Lucie!