TTC and still breastfeeding? Thread # 5 - Positive Vibes!

[peardrop2]

Peardrop - age 33, TTC cycle #9, DS is 26 months (stopped bf soon to be 4 months ago). Af returned when DS 14months, currently on CD14 and have had 4 flashing smileys. Praying for a static smiley tomorrow! Dangling legs in air!

What? Is this a joke? Did I really just read that the Duchess is pregnant again? Can't be true surely?!!!!!

I've seen rumours floating around, has it been confirmed then?!

I heard those rumours but don't think its been confirmed or denied by the royals yet.

How is everyone?

Im on CD48, still no AF, so guessing I should give up hope lol. My temp did drop down, now its all over the place, sure sign of an anovulatory cycle :(
Wondering if my body will gear up to ov again or not. Cant take another 6month cycle! luckily under a month until I see the gynecologist, wish it were sooner but I've waited this long so no point going private now.

Hello! CD 12 here and for some unknown reason I have become paranoid that I may Ov early so we have dtd just incase. Feeling a bit tipsy after a couple of glasses of wine but DH is cold sober so I'm not sure how I've managed to convince him

Lea - ahhh so not long until your appointment now! What a crazy long cycle for you. I thought my 39 days was bad. I'm so sorry that you're in limbo. Sucks

Also, did a OV test today as I just wondered whether there is more pants action then normal. The second line is quite dark. Just wondering if body is trying to gear up early. Oh well I have dtd just incase!

I've spotted a strange pattern. Last month I suddenly got an urge to dtd on cd11 and this month it's been cd12. Weird that. Perhaps my body tries to ovulate but fails and then tries again over a week later. On a good note I think maybe my cycle length is settling. Every month it's been a different number ranging from 27-39 but the last 3 months have been 36, 35 and 36. That's got to be a good sign, right?!

Sounds like your cycle is becoming more regular Pear, has to be a good thing.

I had major ewcm yesterday, all day was dripping sorry for the TMI!! took a opk yesterday and was quite dark, took one today and was positive so seems my body is trying to ovulate on CD51.... we dtd yesterday night and hopefully again tonight so got my fingers crossed that I Ov...

Lea - yay! I have it all crossed that it's your month and that your body is ready before you even have your g appointment!!

I did an opk test this morning and the second line was faint with no ewcm around so I have to wait another week...boring!!

Fingers crossed Leamice! Google has not confirmed Duchess news so thinking not? Google knows everything. Fact.

Those of you that have stopped feeding after 2yrs, or 18 months, how did you drop the bedtime feed?

DH has put DD to bed Thurs, Fri and Sat nights. I did last night and could not manage to say no to her for a v quick feed (though it was 2 mins one side, 1 min the other, tops). Tonight DH did it but i was home and said goodnight. She was ok with this on Saturday (maybe as we'd been together all day) but today she got very upset and was yelling "I want BOOBS" after i left the room and ran around refusing to let DH console her. She actually did calm down ok after 5 mins or so, but I find it v tough to listen to - all my instincts are screaming to just go back and cuddle and feed her.

I guess to really stop i need to refuse her when I'm doing bedtime and let her express her upset about that. I'm not quite motivated enough to do that yet. Though i am really ready for a second baby now.

I thought the three days in a row of no feeding maybe meant I'd stopped making milk, but, although my boobs feel fine (not over full or anything like they were when i was away for night in April) I saw a little milk leaking out on sunday morning which hasn't happened in ages. So the milk production hasn't stopped yet.

I'm out at a work event tomorrow, but realistically will do some bedtimes myself this week.

So tell me ladies, how did you stop the bedtime feed? Any ideas to make it gentle? Or do i have to find a way to just say no and tough it out?

Or is a couple of mins a day maybe ok...?

Dougal - I did things rather differently to you. I told DS that boobies have gone to sleep and there is no more milky. I then said we could have cuddles for as long as he wanted and that I would stay with him. The first night he whimpered in my arms for about 5/10 minutes and I paced the room before putting him in the cot. The second night he asked for cuddles on the chair. We then fell into a trap where I would have to cuddle him for about 30 minutes before he was sleepy enough to fall asleep on his own. After a few weeks of that we then moved to sleeping on the floor next to his cot and then creeping out. A couple of weeks after that I'd had enough and just walked out with him crying for me to come back. I then negotiated that I would sit for 5 minutes and then walk out. That is what we do now. We sit for 5 minutes and then we walk out. He is fine with that.

How old is your DS again Pear?

Dougal I’m very similar to you – DS isn’t ready to give up, but he’s taking very, very little milk now. He’s had a few long weekends at my mum’s house with no problems and I don’t feel full when he’s away so there’s obviously not much milk there. At the moment I’m not ready to push it, we’ve only just started TTC so will see how things are in a few months. Might re-evaluate if not pregnant in, say 6 months.
Fingers crossed for you, pear.
CD18 here (first time I’ve been able to write that!). Nothing exciting to report I’m afraid.

My friend’s little girl was rushed to hospital yesterday – she’s recently been diagnosed with a heart murmur and she collapsed at nursery. They think it’s a nasty virus causing a febrile confulsion. Very upsetting for everybody and she’s quite unwell with the virus. So I went over to my friend’s last night and we had a good chat about things. She’s also hoping for a DC2 but it’s not looking likely as her DH is not onboard. Such a shame as she’s an amazing mum, she has SO much patience! (teacher, so I guess that’s why!).

You poor friend LetTherebe, how frightening.

That sounds really positive Leamice. Good luck for this month.

Peardrop I definitely noticee

We're still feeding here. Not a huge amount, but a little at bedtime and once during the night. I've mostly dropped mornings. I'll try and drop the others if we don't have any joy TTC in the coming months. He's 17 months. I'm away for 2 nights this weekend and he manages fine when I'm not there, but when I come back always looks to feed. Good to hear how some of you are approaching it as one way or another I think we'll be looking to wean soon enough (would not fancy feeding when pregnant either).

CD8 here, this is the boring part! Will ramp up the efforts at the end of this week!

Apparently I'm on cd 11. I'm still in 2 minds about trying this month as it would lead to a due date same time as DS's birthday, obviously that's assuming we'd be extremely lucky!

Elle I've read that children can often wean themselves when you're pregnant as the milk changes or dries up.

Let that sounds awful, hope everything is ok

Hope your friends little one is doing ok cupcakes, must have been so scary for your friend to get that call from nursery.

Dougal, I stopped the bedtime feed when DS was younger so no experience with dropping the bedtime feed for older ones, for the bedtime feed, I gave him a beaker of cows milk then cuddled him to sleep. I still cuddle to sleep most nights, not sure if its for me or him.... I guess I replaced the breastfeeding with cuddles lol. Probably not much help, I realise it must be entirely different to stop feeding toddlers as they understand so much more and can ask for it.

Thanks for the suggestions Pear, Cupcakes and Leamice.

DD rarely drinks cows milk. She does have water at bedtime, and her habit with me is to have a little boob feed, then a drink of water, maybe a little more boobs, then bed.

I know from the experience of dropping the morning feed that it wouldn't be a one night thing if I just start saying no. When we dropped the morning feed she was still asking 3 or 4 weeks later and several times got very upset when the answer was no. She asked again the other day. It's not every day, but she hasn't forgotten it / completely accepted that morning boobs are over.

So me saying no will take more than just one or two nights of strength I think.

Cupcakes, yes sounds similar to your DS. And the truth is I would be happy for her to still have an evening feed while she wants it, if I could be sure I would get pregnant soon.

Dougal - it's such a hard decision isn't it. I remember wishing we could continue but I stopped thinking that it was the night feed stopping me from falling pregnant. It's now been 6 months since I stopped He was 22 months when I stopped the last 7pm feed and he is now 28 months.

I'm so looking forward to next month when I can book a GP appointment and beg for help. I'm on CD16. Started to spot a tiny bit of cm change which is normal a week before my body tries to ov. I've only got 3 tests left so I won't be able to test a lot this month

Cupcakes!! Your poor friend. How traumatic

Thanks Pear. If I were you I would move the 'official' date you stopped BF back when talking with the GP, to push as hard as you can to get a referral etc. It's none of their business when you stopped, really.

And also if they fob you off with 'oh well hormones' then to ask for a second opinion. My GP was so utterly rubbish when we were conceiving DD (mini pill had upset my cycle, causing similar short cycles and luteal phase spotting) that it didn't even occur to me to talk to them this time.

Whereas Auf who was on this thread seemed to get a lot of help direct from her GP.

Thanks Dougal. Unfortunately I think it's now on the computer when I stopped BF as I mentioned it last time. However, my GP was surprisingly supportive to me last time so I have real hope that he will help considering I have will have done the 3 blood tests that he suggested. I will definitely wait for him to ask me about BF again and hopefully have a chance to backdate it!! Failing that I will certainly ask for a second opinion if he says there is nothing else he can do!! I went in guns blazing last time with my notepad and shyly came out a bit taken back that he had been so helpful

How beautiful is the weather this week! I've just been invited to a baby shower...will I be OK?! The good thing about it is children are not allowed so I'll only be surrounded by 1 bump and lots of adult. The crap thing about it as I am 100% sure I'll be asked the dreaded when will you have another child? question

Oooh tricky one. Depends who it is, and who else is likely to be there. Can you give a 'maybe' response which would allow you to opt in or out nearer the time?

is it their first baby? if so maybe the focus will be so much on them you won't get asked. But have some answers ready for if you do.

If asked 'will you have another?' I usually say 'we would like to, yes.' or 'I hope so, yes.'

if asked 'when will you have another?' (which I think is a much more personal and intrusive question) I say 'I don't know, we've got lots going on at the moment' (which is true - renovating our house!)

If asked 'are you trying?' I say ' wow I can't believe you've asked such a personal question'

I'm wondering a bit how to handle my close family, who have so far studiously not asked me. But the standard gap in our family (cousins etc) is 2-3 years and I'd need to be pregnant now for a 3 year gap. In some ways I'd like a bit of support from my brother and SIL, but my mother would both broadcast it around the family, and want to get over involved which I would hate.

Dougal - I love your responses! Made me smile She's a friend I've known for 7 years (from a large group of friends) so I feel like I should be there for her and able to celebrate her happiness! I will start practising some of those answers!! Hopefully I'll be pregnant and then I won't have any trouble!! I'll either be pregnant or have AF to deal with

CD18 for me. I have good news that I have spots appearing around my chin area which is a great sign that I might possibly OV this month. I've also spotted ewcm so I'm really really hoping that I OV over the weekend. I have already discussed dtd plans with DH which starts tonight and then we will go with EOD up until Tuesday/Wednesday. It's hard not to get my hopes up but I am praying that this is my month. I want this so much and I want to be off the TTC roller coaster so bad! As we all do hey!

How is everyone?

Oh and Dougal its her second. Not many friends I know have baby showers for second babies! I don't think personally I will have one. I would feel bad charging people to have tea with me in a hotel just because I'm having another baby lol but then I am thoughtful and would worry about putting people out. As it is I will have to find someone to look after DS for a few hours.

We are still in teething hell, also due to ovulate this weekend according to my app and we are at my mums for the weekend. Both effective contraceptives I reckon!

Ooh baby shower for a subsequent is a bit cheeky imo! Fx you've ovulated this month pear