TTC and still breastfeeding? Thread # 5 - Positive Vibes!

[peardrop2]

Peardrop - age 33, TTC cycle #9, DS is 26 months (stopped bf soon to be 4 months ago). Af returned when DS 14months, currently on CD14 and have had 4 flashing smileys. Praying for a static smiley tomorrow! Dangling legs in air!

Dougal!! It's good to hear from you I had wondered where you had disappeared to! I know... I keep saying I'm going to take a break but it never happens! I think now it's because I don't really want an August baby which is very silly! Can I even afford to take a break!!! Sorry to ask but what sort of costs would I be looking at if I go private? Please could you PM me if you don't want to say publicly. I'd be very interested to know how much I would have to invest! It sounds like you're getting a lot of help. Are you finding it ease the stress or just as stressful?

My progesterone levels came back today. Last month it was 53.1 and this month it is 20.5 so quite a difference The doctor is calling it borderline. Looks like I didn't ovulate this month after all It's weird...you stare at the ov sticks and you jump and down when you get a static smiley but you never believe that it might all be for nothing and that the egg never actually left the building!

Hi Dougal crossing my fingers that this is your month. It must be good to know something is being done to help fix your issues. I wonder if my NHS GYN will be as good, dh and I have already talked about going private too. he's 41 and doesn't feel he has all the time in the world, I know everything works longer for men but its more the age factor, doesn't want to be too old raising school kids.

pear, sorry for the disappointing results, will your GP be more helpful now can see theres not regular OV? hopefully you'll get more tests.

Still no AF here, don't think I could have OV'd after all! [sigh]

Lea - or are you pregnant? my doctor says I need to have one more blood test (3 in total) before the next discussion happens.

I found out that somebody else I know is now pregnant. It happened quite quickly after a MC too. I know another friend who has had a recent MC so I'm expecting her to announce news v soon. I found myself in a very small space with lots of babies yesterday. I did avoid baby cuddles which was great!

Don't encourage my crazy Pear!! I'm almost certainly not at from my chart I'm either 15dpo or 19dpo so would have had a +be by now, I'm testing daily with ICs (because I'm crazily holding out hope)

So hard being surrounded by babies and pregnancy announcements. I suspect another of my antenatal group is expecting, though not announced. Funny as I was the one who wanted to ttc asap and everyone thought I was crazy and looks like I'll probably be the last one to conceive no2 haha (laughing so I don't cry!)

Didn't check before posting, I hope that makes sense with the typos!

*pregnant not at
*+ve not +be

Pear - I am happy to share. I am a bit behind on paper work and am paying as I go so have not totted up, but what really matters is the pattern they see you in and how much they charge for appointments.

Basically you'll go and see them, they will order blood tests. That is LH, FSH etc on days 2-5 of your cycle (maybe a few others) and then progesterone levels on day 21. I had this done before I saw the gynaecologist on the recommendation of a nurtritionist. Cost £350 for the lot, though I was tested for thyroid function, vitamin D levels and a few other things too as the nutritionist request it.

I took this along to my first gynae appointment (though I saw her when we conceived DD - the mini pill had messed up my cycle so she knew me).

Happily these tests were everything she needed so didn't need to get that done again. Also, good news was that one of them (I can't remember the name, the one that measures the quality of the eggs you have) had improved since I saw her three years ago. So its not true these things always decline. I chalk that up to the nutritionist sorting out what I am eating.

My blood tests show my progesterone levels are not as high as they could be. So my pattern is:

See gynae around day 11 of my cycle. She scans me to see how ovulation is progressing. If it looks like I have / will ovulate she give me something to support that, and progesterone for the second half of the cycle.

This cycle the day 11 scan suggested ovulation wasn't about to happen, so she gave me something to bring that on, then I went back three days later. Scanned again, ovulation confirmed, gave me something to support post ovulation plus a higher does of progesterone for the second half of this cycle.

She charges £250 per appointment, including the scan. She was saying that she was willing to give me 'a recipe' the drugs to self administer for a few cycles so I wouldn't need an appointment with her each cycle, but now it appears I am not ovulating on a regular pattern I think she might be less up for that.

Drugs etc are included. Costs of other tests are not. Eg. if no success this cycle she wants DH to do a sperm test, will be a fee to analyse that, i'd expect about £100.

I've not been billed yet so don't know whether she will charge for both appointments last week, but I assume so.

These are central London prices, might be less outside London or the South East.

When we conceived DD I saw her for two cycles, successful second time. The all in cost of the blood tests and appointments with her was a bit less than £1000.

If we don't have success this cycle I think I will park the gynae for a cycle or two while I focus on DD stopping feeding.

I felt like we were really close and if only my progesterone levels were higher I'd have a BFP.

If it doesn't turn out that way it seems a bit silly to continue spend at this level while I'm still BF.

That sounds really thorough Dougal, and promising for this month?

Pear will your GP prescribe progesterone supplements?

No AF yet for me, today surely? Did a test on an IC and definitely BFN just before anyone asks if I'm pregnant! I think ov sticks were definitely wrong last month. This month I think we'll just DTD at least every other day between CD10 and CD20 and forget about ov sticks etc.

Thanks for the welcomes, and the sound advice - which is annoying but true - everyone is different. Oh, if only it was do XYZ and BFP happens.

Since I posted, we had an amazing night on Wednesday, when DD slept through the night (nb I know milk isn't a big part of her nutrition now, but she ate an unusually large amount at dinner, and then threw up the bedtime milk as she was overfull! And then slept through - coincidence? Or no emerging hunger in early hours). So, no night feed required! I have cut the wake up one all week (except on the sleep through night, but I felt it was well deserved). This morning she only required it at 05:15, so hopefully we may be moving away from night time milk wakes, which may help my hormone levels further. I'm feeling positive about it all - I'll enjoy this, as I may be feeling down in the dumps in a months' time!

After a nightmare weekend in August when she lifted my top up in public constantly, and was going crazy for it, I became resolute in my decision to cut down, and am happy to do so. I like not wearing tank tops and I'm looking forward to not having a hand down my top/ top lifted up. Very few people know we are still BF-ing (lots of negativity about bf-ing from in-laws), so it would be nice to not have to keep it secret anymore.

My friend I though pregnant just announced with a lovely scan pic today. Happy for her as took them a while to conceive #1 but can't help feeling so jealous that it's not me and guilty for feeling that way

That's great your dd is sleeping better espresso, you're right, it can only help those hormones level out. Very positive :)

Hi all. DS is teething and wanting night feeds. I'm giving in at the moment because it gets him back to sleep but feel like I'm going to have a fight on my hands to get him back out of the habit. I'm not really enjoying feeding atm it hurts and he gets so whingy asking for it.

Thought AF was paying a visit today but then seemed to go away. It's not any kind of implantation as nothing has been implanted this month! Be good to have something to put into my period tracking calendar thingy. Can't believe it's coming up to two years since DS was conceived.

Anyway enough ramblings. Happy Friday all.

Sorry for radio silence. Holiday and Jeffrey, took ages to reset my password and am only now getting back on to all of my regular threads.

AF finally returned 3 months to the day after I stopped taking the pill, then had a second AF last week. Unless it was fluke I've gone straight back to my pre-pregnancy cyle of 33 days.

I'm another one surrounded by pregnant people, and totally understand the "jealous but guilty" feeling!

CD 26 here. Spotting (which I have been throughout this cycle, since the gynae gave me something to bring on ovulation, unusual for me) increased over the weekend. This morning it looks like it is tipping over into my period. Need to do a test to confirm so I know to stop taking the progesterone supplements.

Feeling very down and pessimistic. Have already retreated to the loos at work to have a weep this morning

dougal and lots of

Awwww Dougal. Big hugs! Nothing I can say will make you feel better but we're here for your tears and moans!! Thank you so much for sharing your experience with Gyni. It really helps to hear how much I would need to save

My mum announced yesterday that she would give me money to go private if needed. Wow, I did not realise how desperate she is for me to fall pregnant again . It's just time, I'm sure I'm getting ahead of myself here! AF has gone and I've got another two weeks of nothing exciting happening.

Cupcakes - great news about your cycle settling.

Lea - I totally get the feeling. I no longer feel guilty though!

That's - did AF show?

Yep started properly now, be interesting to see what happens this month.

Best of luck for this month ThatsNot and Peardrop. That's really nice of your Mum peardrop.

I'm sorry Dougal, that's tough.

Still no sign of AF here. What on earth is going on (definitely not pregnant)? Last 4 cycles were all 31 days exactly and now as soon as we start TTC it goes haywire. CD35 now. Wondering did my body psyche itself up to ov, then not, but did later in the cycle? Or maybe just not at all? Frustrating as I was hoping we could just get cracking on the next cycle.

I'm in the same boat Elle no AF, no signs of it coming but I probably didn't ov :(

Dougal did AF appear or was it just spotting? got my fc for you.

Thats sorry for AF, good luck for this cycle

Welcome back Cupcakes, very jealous of your regular cycles haha! hopefully not a fluke :)

and lovely of your mum Pear, sounds like she's looking forward to more grandkids :)

Thank you all for the kind words.

Yes AF is well and truly here.

I spent a good 20 mins crying in the loos at work yesterday. And then had a big weep all over DH at home in the evening too.

I really really hoped / wanted to either get pregnant while still BF, or for DD to dictate when she stops. And as my cycle patterns were improving, I hoped a bit of a boost from the gynaecologist would tip me over into BFP land.

I think now I need to let go of those wishes, and focus on the big picture. Perhaps we need to make a good space for another child in our lives. As DH said last night, another child would be great for all of us, including DD.

I told DD last night that the Boobs were going to stop working, that we have had an amazing journey, that I have loved every minute of it (while crying copiously). She didn't really listen, as she flitted between my two boobs as is her habit now.

She is really nearly there, ok with just one feed at bedtime, and that is minutes short and she flits between them. All the same she tells our nanny (and me) how much she loves boobs.

Still. Big picture. DH is putting her to bed tonight. I am still in the office, I have lots of deadlines approaching. Probably he will put her to bed tomorrow, too. If so, that will be the longest I've ever gone without feeding or pumping since she was born 27 months ago.

So this may be the end. Or maybe she'll have another little go some bedtimes yet. For me the big moment will be when she happily does bedtime with me without having a feed.

Dh and I have agreed to skip the gynae for a cycle or maybe two. It is crazy to spend that amount of money while I'm still feeding. Hopefully my cycle will settle down quickly, I'll get through these work deadlines well, we will get our house move done. We will try au natural meantime, although I've also talked with DH about how we need to prioritise the every day things: going to bed earlier, eating well, exercise. We have had too many cycles where we stay up late to DTD even though we are both running on empty. We are a bit the walking cliché of the cash rich / time poor couple, and that's not good physically or emotionally for conception. I don't think a gynaecologist can fix that, or vice versa, her help will go a lot further if we are prioritising the health and mindset basics.

I read my way out of misery yesterday, and found two links I thought I would share:

First this article www.thealphaparent.com/2014/12/how-to-get-pregnant-whilst-breastfeeding.html on how a sudden burst of energy dense foods can signal to your body that it is safe to get pregnant. I wish it had a bit more info on what to eat, but nevertheless I will be giving this a go this month to see if I can signal to my body that I'm ready. I have a v high metabolism, so getting to the point of my body intitively feeling abundance would help cycles I think.

Second this beautiful piece on the magic, power and joy of breast feeding www.naturalchild.org/guest/ruth_kamnitzer.html

I'll say it once more with feeling. I love my DD. I have loved every single moment of our breastfeeding journey. Whether it ends now or not, I hope and pray we can give her the sibling she deserves.

Dougal that really moved me. You have done an amazing thing for your DD and you sound like such a lovely mum. I really hope for some more BFPs in here soon for all of you.

Dougal - thanks for the links I think you're pretty amazing too! You should be mega proud of your achievements. We all should. It's amazing what we've done for our babies. Feeding my son was the best 22 months of my life and I can't believe why so many of my friends choose not to or stop so early (mostly 6 months). I am the only person I know who made it to 22months and I don't even think that is that long now. It's an amazing bond isn't it. There are just no words! Dougal, I think focusing on your health sounds very sensible. I aim to do the same. Early nights and healthy eating has to be a good thing.

Just popping out of lurking to say what a lovely piece *Dougal"
21 months and no period but I think that's partly as DS is a bit allergic so I;ve been off dairy and egg and nuts for 19 of those months. I'm 3-4 dress sizes smaller so I'm suspicious the starvation theory is here. Milk ladder starting though......

Oh Dougal. I am sorry.

Feeding her to 27 months is an amazing achievement, you should be really proud. It sounds like you're reaching the tipping point where the benefits of a sibling outweigh the benefits of continuing to feed.

If you have a lot on at work and a house move I think that's enough to contend with for the moment. I think that getting to bed earlier, exercise and good food are definitely worth prioritising. Mother Nature is smart and I do worry about not conceiving because I feel like I'm running on empty a lot of the time. Going into my first pregnancy I was so healthy and had so much energy and I am in a very different place now.

Finally AF showed up here. 5 days late, but I'm relieved.