RESPONSE Trial for recurrent miscarriage: Thread#3

[Marchgirl]

For anyone on the RESPONSE medical trial for recurrent miscarriage, or thinking of joining. Peeps at all stages of the trial welcome!

Link to previous thread is here

Sorry you've had some spotting gen. Why can't it just be straightforward? Hope it buggers off soon but i would agree with calling the trial nurse x

I really wish it was straightforward! I feel like all the fun and excitement of pregnancy has been sucker out of it! My mate messaged me this morning to tell me she was pregnant before I saw it on facebook which I really appreciate but she is 32 and this is baby number 8!! She needs to share her secrets me thinks!! X

Gen the stringy stuff I'd say is just old blood, but def worth the phonecall!
Ditto here with fertile friend. I have a friend that has 7 kids, the first 6 conceived on the pill (apparently), and number 7 was because his vasectomy didn't work!!
She's been tied now and her youngest is 4 so I'd say she's not having more!

Brummie hope all ok for tomorrow!!

Choccywoccydodah 8 m/c pregnant due 24th Oct 2015
Sizethree 3 m/c pregnant due 5th Nov 2015
Indiedog 4 m/c pregnant due 2nd Dec 2015
MAS7 pregnant due 10th Dec 2015
LouiseM1987 3 m/c pregnant due 4th Jan 2016
Philippa88 4 m/c pregnant due Jan 2016
Joy2713 6 m/c pregnant with twins due Jan 2016
Marchgirl 5 m/c pregnant due 22nd March 2016
Brummiemum87 4 m/c pregnant
Genwah85 pregnant
Kazz2112 3 m/c pregnant
Clairemorgan81 3 m/c
Vicki272 3 m/c

sorry your spotting genwah let us know what trial nurse says hopefully they 'll fit you in for a scan as 2 wks is a long wait. big hugs.

good luck for scan tomorrow brummie will be thinking of you.

hope everyone is doing okay x

god its bloody awful seeing my name at the bottom of the stats!!

god its bloody awful seeing my name at the bottom of the stats

god its bloody awful seeing my name at the bottom of the stats

Same Claire... I'm still with you at the bottom. Fingers crossed for us this month eh? xx

Did anyone see the lovely message that Mark Zuckerburg put on facebook? They were announcing their pregnancy but talked about the fact that they had had 3 mcs... How it was a lonely experience etc. I thought that it was a really brave thing to do, sharing that with the whole world. X

Great is luck on the scan tomorrow brummie!

Fingers crossed for you Gen...

Hope you are feeling okay Kazz and staying as calm as you possibly can.

Hope everyone is okay! Xx

I seen his post Vicki what he wrote was lovely

hope its our month vicki did you start ov testing today? Did you manage to get some cheap internet ov tests?

I'm not only pissed off about mcs I'm now worried about why I'm not conceiving. it's been 8 months since last mc. the whole thing is just shit.

sorry about multiple post - something else shit.......this app!!x

Really really hope it's your month, both of you too. Would be so nice to have everyone pg. As you've got your gynae appointment booked it's bound to happen before that claire!

Thanks ladies, I will report back to you.

Vicki I read their story the other night, made me emotional! Lovely to see people discussing it openly, it seems such a taboo subject. I only told a few close friends & my parents about our losses...we haven't even told any of husbands family as they always feel the need to tell the whole world! I know I've always been anxious telling people incase they assume I'm doing something wrong but I know nobody truly thinks like that & I've had nothing but support off people I have told. X

Started ov testing yesterday, the cheap ones arrived. Got some one step ones I think they were called?

Fingers crossed for both of us Claire! Thanks March! I feel like j
I need all the luck in the world at the mo.

I thought his post was lovely too... We told close friends and family and work knew in the end too. As the first MC was a missed one, had to wait a week for the op, then they messed it up so had to go back in. Because it was all over christmas had to wait for ages so was off work for a long time! Not many know that we have had 3 though... Does make you think... Are they thinking I am doing something wrong?

I thought what he says pretty much summed it up. It's incredibly lonely going through it all... Such a taboo subject still. Which is odd really when it is apparently so common! X

Right... On the ov testing kits (cheap Internet ones) what does a slightly fainter line next to the control mean?

I tried yesterday and just had the control line... Then today have another line, the pack instructions say that if it is fainter than the control its a negative. But it is still quite dark! Xx

Vicki the lines have to be the same colour or the test line darker on those for it to be positive. Mine usually started light then Grady got darker. I used to test twice a day but with those do NOT use fmu.

I've always been upfront about my mcs. I've never been ashamed about them, and thought if my friends shy off from me then they're obviously not real friends. I recently had a go at some 'friends' about this recently after they did admit they felt bad as they'd had babies etc. I kind of understood that but I did say I told you because I wanted support and wanted to be around babies as it actually helped! Being dropped certainly didn't!
Mcs have been a part of my life and will be there forever, I will always talk about them and tell my boys about it all one day x

And Claire and Vicki you WILL be pregnant by the end of sept!!!!!!

They are totally different to the hpt vicki. A faint line isn't a positive (for most people). You'll probably find that you get a gradually darkening line and you'll be thinking "that's quite dark, that must be a positive, but these things are rubbish", then the next day you'll get a really dark one and feel a bit sheepish for doubting them (or maybe that's just me!)

There are a few people on the rmc board who seem to have a low lh surge and for them,they are completely blank for most of the month and the faintest line is a positive, but i think this is unusual. If you normally get a smiley on the digis you shouldn't have a problem.

Ahh March I hope your right.

vicki I think I have same ov tests if line isn't equal or darker than control one its negative. hopefully it won't be long for you. I usually test at lunchtime and about 5 with those ones.
I have only told close family/close friends and a few people at work. a few extra colleagues were told as 3 ladies I work with asked on separate occasions if I was pregnant as looked it, charming. I responded by saying no I'm not but am carrying a little extra weight around my tum as I've had a mc. I would be mortified but they didn't seem bothered one bit. the last time it happened was about 3 wks ago, made me feel like shit, some people have no idea how to go on!x

Evening ladies, lots to catch up on!!
I felt baby move just last week at 14 weeks, it's like a butterfly flapping it's wings really fast, so almost like a buzzing! It's only when I'm lying still and normally about this time of night! My first baby too :)
Kazz all you can do is take it day by day - the first few weeks are really hard but even further along, for me, time is still dragging! There's no real way to relax other than hope, hope and hope!
Gl girls ttc, it will happen!!! Xx

I lost two friendships due to ME having MCs!!

To cut a long story short, I lost my mum when I was 21. I had my partner who is now my hubby, and we got on with it.
I have always been a tough cookie, and dealt with things, and I'm not one to spill my heart out to even friends.

So I meet them when our DC where born. Had my first MC, which they knew about, but they didn't put pressure on me to talk too much.
Then I had a second, and just kinda kept going. One of them knew as she was a nurse.
I was seemly plodding along, I had moved on, but apparently they thought I should be talking about it!! I wasn't opening up to them.
That's not me, I don't do that, I deal with it in my own way and get on. My friends have always been there IF I need to talk, otherwise they are there to have fun with, social, go out, distract from everyday life.

Well anyway, the pair of them got me round to one of their houses one evening, on my own, and literally said I NEED to talk to them about stuff. I HAVE to get it off my chest. One of them even put her shoes on and said I can't do this anymore, and went to leave,!!!

Yep SHE couldn't deal with it. I was in tears, and felt totally picked on.

Anyway I left saying ok, I will talk more! Just so I could go home and cry!

I eventually realised that it was them who had the problem, they were quite happy to spill their guts about every little problem they had, God their poor hubbies took a hammering! They didn't like the fact that I sorted myself out, accepted what had happened, picked myself up and got on, with the help of hubby of course. But I didn't need to spill to them. All I needed from them was their friendship, and time and to BE THERE IF I wanted to talk. Like my other two close friends have. They don't pester me with what's going on.
Those two clearly couldn't deal with how I coped, didn't hear from them much after that, now not at all.

I now realise some people want to talk, so you listen and support.
Some people don't want to talk, but your their for them, and when/if they do talk, you listen.
Everyone is different, and we should be able to openly discuss what we want to, if we want too.
I would happily discuss my MCs to anyone, if someone wanted to know or I needed to talk. I wouldn't put it upon someone if they were uncomfortable.

It's a funny old thing.
Sorry, blah blah blah. Bit of a rant. That probably makes no sense, but can of worms springs to mind, and nothing like having a good rant!

Thanks ladies!! That clears it up massively! I will keep at it... Thought it was really early to ov. According to my usual cycle I am about 5 or 6 days away!

Claire... That's bloody charming isn't it? Douchbags!! if it makes you feel any better, my tummy is the same!

I know exactly what you mean about the friends thing choccy! We have some like that... I really hate it when people just ignore it! I know its a hard thing to discuss but even just an 'I am thinking of you' or something like that is all you need.

On the flip, we have some amazing friends... After our first, they delivered a hamper of DVDs, food goodies and pamper stuff with the sweetest card ever. Just because. Makes me cry just thinking about how thoughtful it was.

Xx

Tbh my "friends" most of them are a bunch of arseholes ! My best friend after I told her I'd miscarried for the third time asked me
If I'd thought about how I wanted to give birth c section or natural (seriously ) she then told me this time to be happy and excited because if it ends at least I'd of been excited ! Yes seriously ! Then her and her dh compared their fears with there non problem pregnancy (who's nearly one) with my current pregnancy (I don't think it's the same )
Other friends have told me to get over it and grown up as you see babies everywhere ! I've never once talked to them about it they all know I've gone thru 3 but I've never sat there and told them
Everything. One friend who I wasn't close to has been my rock. Sorry rant over I just get wound up as they have NO idea what it's like and feel they can express an opinion on how I should act when they have no idea how I'm dealing with it as they now don't talk to me any more( I'm glad - bunch of pricks )
Sorry I hope everyone has had a nice evening it's been lovely on cov today finally but I went to check on my parents house and the pond is dry whoops ! Luckily there is a little bit of water and some fishes still alive so spent the evening trying to refill it

Sorry lloooooong ranty message xxx

Omg can't actually believe all these bfps big congrats kazz, just trying to keep up with the board!

Indie my scan was today, I've had no internet,stupid data usage, but just brought some more so I could use what's app to send scan pics! Thank you so much for your offer though, and if your in Totton your just up the road from me :)

So my twins gender scan was this morning... And we are Team PINK twice! 2 girls, I literally can't believe it as we have ds and I was fully expecting another 2 boys!

Good luck tomorrow Brummie xx