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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

ttc #1 support during the waiting game and friends needed on same boat

393 replies

beccarella · 15/06/2015 22:27

Hi ladies! I am 33 and have been trying to get preggars 6months now :( feels like forever. my partner has two children from prev relationship (marriage) and his ex fell pregnant straight away apparently, my younger sister-by 6 yrs is pregnant with her 2nd which happened 2 months into her relationship ! I have been really positive this month but my period is due wed and now i have brown spotting-meaning am out again. I guess i am just on a downer now... this sucks. I have a regular 28 day cycle and ovulate day 13 (opk) and have sex at least every other day! eating more healthily and tried fertilcm to help. I have worked with children for years and so long for my own. I am addicted to these threads and love how everyone is so supportive of one another! Fairy dust to us all!x

OP posts:
SharyBobbins · 03/08/2015 14:20

Hi ladies, thank you for the warm welcome Smile
I've been having a little look round other threads on this forum & a couple of people have mentioned seeing the GP, having fertility checks etc. Sorry, I know how clueless I must sound but is this something we're supposed to do early on when ttc? I'd read online that you should see your GP after 12 months of trying?
My last three cycles have been 43 days, the first one was around 36 (just four cycles since coming off the pill in January due to the length of them and periods which last a week!). Apparently a 42+ cycle makes me irregular? Surely I need to try a few more things before troubling my GP? Sorry in advance I'm having a wobble today... Sad

VioletIbiza88 · 03/08/2015 14:38

Shary I think its generally 12 months trying and then see the gp is no luck by then. Although if you're over 35 or have a known gynae issue that may impact on ttc then after 6 months. When I came off hormonal contraceptives in Jan, I had one long cycle and then they settled down to between 26 and 29 days, but everyone is different, and some seem to take longer to get back to their pre-pill cycle length. What was your cycle like before you went on the pill? Personally I would see how it goes a bit longer and see if they shorten on their own, I wouldn't worry yet. Do you use opk's - do you know if you are ovulating? x

PallasCat · 03/08/2015 15:43

Don't worry Shary! I have also seen comments on here and advice elsewhere (maybe WebMD...? Can't really recall) about seeing your GP at the start of TTC. I don't get the impression that many people do. At this stage it certainly wouldn't be anything about treatments/difficulty conceiving. As Violet said, it's 12months TTC before seeking medical support for conception, or 6 months if you're 35+ or have a condition/situation which would make it harder to conceive.

Seeing your doc at the start of TTC would I think be more of an MOT - weight, diet, smoking/drinking habits, any existing medication you're taking. Perhaps discussion about family history with reference to conception, history of spina bifida or anything of the sort. Also advice about starting dietary supplements like folic acid/iron (which I have done, because of maternal family having a history of spina bifida).

So my view (for myself, anyway!) is that if you are in good general health and are keeping yourself well-informed (and the fact that you're on here already suggests you are) there probably isn't a need.

Obviously if you have any specific cause for concern around TTC, then of course, see your GP.

So far as post-pill period mayhem it is not unusual for this to take a good 6 months to settle down. I came off the pill last November, and my cycles just now seem to be starting to make a bit of sense!

FX for you - it is early days and it doesn't sound like you have anything to worry about yet. Smile

Babycakes100 · 03/08/2015 18:12

Welcome newbies!

Sorry to hear about the long cycles ladies.

Feel you pain. CD 51 and nothing. No AF, no sore boobs, no BFP. Nothing. I think I'm broken :(

sunshinegirl12 · 03/08/2015 18:26

Welcome 2 all the new peopleSmile

I have the opposite problem and worry that my cycles are too short, usually around 24 days but AF started today which was super early even for me (21 days)... as if Monday mornings aren't bad enough anyway. So have spent most of today in a major sulk googling anything that might improve my chances.

I think I'm going to start taking my temp each morning from tomorrow. We were going to have a month off ttc so I wouldnt be on holiday during very early pregnancy as we are going with family and I know they would click on when I'm not drinking, but now the time has come I dont think I can stand a month off (just incase) so would just have to tell them if I was. Hmmm.

Suppose atleast I can have a nice glass of wine tonightWine xx

SharyBobbins · 03/08/2015 18:39

Thank you so much for your replies VioletIbiza88 & PallasCat, your reassurances really have helped! ttc is making me even more irrational than usual. I don't think AF & an empty office (too much time to over think) have helped today either!

Violet- if I'm honest I'm struggling to remember my cycle pre-pill but I do remember it wasn't 28 days, possibly every 5 weeks from what I can vaguely recall. So I guess they've always been longer than average. I didn't used OPKs for the first few cycles- I'd convinced myself I was going to be super chilled about ttc! I used the CB 'smiley face tests' one cycle & got quite a few highs before a peak that time round. After that I switched to the CB advanced monitor but because it was my first time using it the monitor told me to test between day 6-26 so although I got some high readings it was too early to detect a peak. I'm going to use that alongside cheaper test strips from Amazon this cycle.

PallasCat- thank you for your views, my rational self agrees with you entirely! I'm glad your cycles have settled down, mayhem is a good way to describe it!

Babycakes- when did you come off your contraception? It's SO frustrating isn't it. Any other long cycle ladies out there?

Nice to meet you Sunshinegirl, enjoy your well deserves wine! It must be so frustrating having your AF come around so quickly Sad Hope you're feeling okay x

sunshinegirl12 · 03/08/2015 19:02

Thanks Shary. I'm ok, luckily AF isnt causing any pain this time round and DH is out at a job (probably lucky for him so he doesn't experience me in my sulk)Hmm I've put my thermometer out next to the bed ready for morning though I'm not sure how good I'll be at keeping to it. Hope you're all having a good evening xx

Babycakes100 · 03/08/2015 19:46

Hi Shary :) sorry to hear that you have been so anxious and worried. It doesn't help does it...it's like a vicious cycle! You should definitely go to see your GP if it will help to put your mind at rest :) don't put it off. But just to make you feel better, your cycle lengths really aren't too bad, especially if you've recently come off contraception. I hope things settle down for you soon x

I came off the pill a year ago...had 3 irregular AFs (about 6/7 weeks apart) then nothing for 6/7 months. Now I'm on CD51. I think I do have fertility problems to be honest. Going to the docs at the end of this month. Wish I never went on the pill :( especially considering I don't think I would have even got pregnant. Seriously I've had sooo much unprotected sex with DH and nothing, ha! Have to laugh so I don't cry.

SharyBobbins · 03/08/2015 20:53

Babycakes- I'm sorry to hear you're having such a rough time, I hope your GP can put your mind at rest and give you some support. I've only been on this forum a couple of days but it's already obvious that there are lots of lovely ladies on here who can offer you advice & wise words xx
I wish I'd come off the pill much earlier. Its ridiculous, a couple of years ago the thought of getting pregnant terrified me, I only ever missed a pill the once and was convinced I'd fall pregnant! If only I knew how much it actually takes to make a baby Sad

PallasCat · 03/08/2015 21:50

Sorry for AF sunshine. You're well entitled to a sulk IMO

Sorry to hear you so down babycakes. Definitely worth a visit to GP.

sunshinegirl12 · 04/08/2015 08:25

I know what you mean Shary, if we ever had an accident I would always rush off to buy the morning after pill, probably shouldn't have bothered. Dh has agreed that we should carry on trying despite family holiday coming up so I feel better about that as we arent wasting a month, and I started on the B50 and D3 this morning as I've read that has helped alot of ladies so feeling more positive today. Think what makes it so hard is that we all just have to wait around and hope for the best with no control over it.

I hope everyone is ok todaySmile xx

SharyBobbins · 04/08/2015 09:06

Do you mind me asking what B50 & D3 are? (I'm definitely a baby making novice!!) Smile x

sunshinegirl12 · 04/08/2015 11:01

Of course not, from what I've read B50 is meant to help regulate cycles and lengthen the luteal phase which will hopefully help with my short cycles, and Vitamin D is meant to boost fertility by balancing hormones (could be another reason why so many couples conceive on holiday) I think I read D3 is the most easily absorbed form of vitamin D.

I don't know if it will help but fingers crossed xx

SharyBobbins · 04/08/2015 14:28

Thanks Sunshinegirl Smile I'm taking Seven Seas 'trying for a baby' pills at the moment which have folic acid, vitamin D & iron in them. I'm going to stick with them for a while I think. I've just had a (very helpful) conversation with a gentleman at CB who asked if I'm taking any supplements & said they are fine with the advanced monitor which is good. Apparently some supplements lead to false high readings Shock I've had some faith restored in the monitor after talking to him. He's explained how I can make it work for me even though I fall outside of the 21-42 day category so I'm looking forward to getting home & readjusting it (sad I know!).
Hope everyone is having a good day x

PallasCat · 04/08/2015 14:47

That sounds really positive, Shary. Glad they could help you. I'm also on the Seven Seas one.

bananafish81 · 04/08/2015 15:53

Hi ladies

Hello all and welcome newbies

This is a long one, so strap in! Apols for such a long post, but quite a lot has gone on over the last week.

I saw my consultant last Monday for the results of my Day 3 bloods, and they were pretty much catastrophic.

When I’d last had bloods done, at the age of 28, my FSH was great (low), my AMH was good (high), my ovaries were polycystic but my antral follicle count was good and I had a cracking ovarian reserve. PCOS presents fertility issues, but it's usually very easily dealable-withable.

Dial forward 5 years, and my blood tests last week indicated at 33 I had the ovaries of a premenopausal women in her late 40s. FSH ridiculously high (v bad), AMH practically non existent (very very bad). So bad that most clinics wouldn’t accept someone with those scores as the chances of getting any eggs out for IVF would be tiny. Seemingly crashing towards premature ovarian failure.

FUCK.

However the scan showed a different picture. There was some activity going on in my ovaries, incl a dominant follicle, suggesting I was gearing up to ovulate this month. Whereas the blood tests suggested we’d see ovaries that were completely asleep.

In the consultant’s words ‘something doesn’t stack up’, as the tests are saying two completely different things, and all my meds over recent years might have sent my hormones haywire. So he starts me on low dose Clomid (50mg, 5 day course) to see if it has any effect at all on my ovaries, and to come back in a week.

The last week has been so so hard, as it was a lot to deal with. I’d gone from being polycystic with a good ovarian reserve at 28, to seemingly pre menopausal at 33.

I was coming to terms with the very real possibility I might never be able to conceive, and seriously thinking about the possibility of donor eggs. And very, very, very sad.

However.

Given the bloods, it looked like we’d need the sledgehammer approach to get any response, and the gentle nudge of low dose Clomid was likely to do bugger all.

Except it didn’t. I took it Mon-Fri last week, and today the scan showed a nice ripe juicy 22mm follicle, and 2 other smaller ones that the Clomid had kicked into gear.

Fuck. Me.

Consultant said he absolutely didn’t expect to see this at ALL. He was flabbergasted looking at the ultrasound screen. It is v v v good news.

Holy crap, my ovaries responded to low dose Clomid. WTF?!

My lining was very thin, so even if we do manage to catch this egg, the chances of implantation this month are slim. And giving me medication to thicken the lining would throw everything else out, and he doesn’t want to bugger around with my messed up hormones even more.

That said, I’m going for a trigger shot tomorrow, and should ovulate 36h later. If DH can get back to London by tomorrow evening, we’ve been told to DTD Thu and Fri to see if we can catch the egg. Not expecting anything, but we’ll give it a go just in case!

Hopefully if I ovulate, that’ll mean I have an actual cycle, and even if I don’t get a proper period because the lining is so thin, my cycle will be reset so we can redo the Day 3 bloods.

And more to the point, given I’ve miraculously responded to 50mg Clomid, then there is a v v v good chance that I should respond well to much stronger FSH stimulation for IVF. And that if the lining is looking too thin, we can freeze any embryos we get, give me medication to thicken up the lining and do a FET the next month so there’s hopefully a nice comfy lining to give the best chance of implantation.

Continuing with Clomid isn’t going to do much to get me pregnant if it makes me ovulate but thins my lining. Injectables won’t thin my lining, but the risk of multiples with injectables + DTD is too great, so injectables + IVF gives us a much better chance of a healthy pregnancy.

And whereas last week it was ‘there’s a slim chance of IVF working but it’s very slim’, it’s now ‘OK things are looking much much better, let’s go full steam ahead and try and get me pregnant’.

My consultant trained under Professor Robert Winston and is the lead clinician for reproductive medicine at Barts Hospital, so he knows his stuff. He said the bloods had him completely stumped and (his words) ‘I’m not usually stumped’.

So Christ knows what kind of medical marvel I am.

However what’s going on with my ovaries is what matters right now, not what the bloods say. And that’s a hell of a lot more positive than the bloods would suggest.

Head still spinning, but now in a good way.

We have a plan. And things are looking significantly more positive than they were.

PHEW.

Sorry for epic post, but it’s been a long old week.

Trigger shot tomorrow, hopefully AF in 2 weeks time, redo bloods, see consultant first week in September, start IVF, keep fingers crossed.

And breathe.

PallasCat · 04/08/2015 16:10

Blimey, bananafish! What a dramatic week for you. I'm so glad things took such a positive (and surprising!) turn for you. FX massively for you, and hoping DH can make it back in time. You must be drained with all that going on. Try and get some much-needed rest over the next couple of days, as well as hopefully DTD!

Babycakes100 · 04/08/2015 16:19

Banana - wow it has been quite a week for you. I'm so sorry to hear about the results of your bloods and all that you have had to go through this week. I admire your strength appreciate you sharing. It sounds like things could all be working out ok. Stay positive. I sincerely hope you catch the egg this week or that your plan works out v v soon xxx

Sizzle81 · 04/08/2015 19:43

Wow Banana!!! What a roller coaster! So glad things have turned positive for you. Fx x
So sorry for those with long cycles. I really hadn't thought about the negative side.
Nothing to report on my end. Just pissed at OH as no dtd at all so am sure I've missed this month.

SharyBobbins · 04/08/2015 20:25

Sending you lots of luck Banana, I really hope everything works out for you.
Is your other half away Sizzle? Hope you're okay, you sound very fed up x

Sizzle81 · 04/08/2015 20:43

Hi Shary- OH is not away. He has quite a low sex drive and just isn't interested although does was a child with me. He has a 5 yr old dd and I get the idea that it didn't take long to conceive her. I have tried to explain about the small windows and how lucky he actually is that it only took a couple of months but he just doesn't get it.
I'm of course panicking because, having never been pregnant, I worry that I'm not fertile. Grr! Sorry for the rant but I've been keeping it bottled!! xx
How are you this evening? !!

SharyBobbins · 04/08/2015 21:12

I know what you mean Sizzle, because I've never been pregnant I keep having thoughts about not being able to conceive. I'm sure other ladies on this thread probably do too Sad I can't even begin to imagine how frustrated you are feeling tonight. I think my hubby was quite shocked when I explained how narrow the window of opportunity to get pregnant is (to be honest I think I'm still shocked by it!) xx

Mermaid36 · 04/08/2015 21:42

Yeah, my hubby was also surprised/shocked when I told him about the tiny window of opportunity we had.... I think he thought we'd DTD a few times a week for a couple of months and it would all magically happen...

Sizzle81 · 04/08/2015 21:55

Exactly! How do people "accidently" get pregnant!!
Oh, if only!
I think I just felt really positive this month and now not so much, but oh well.
Early night for me! xxx

SharyBobbins · 04/08/2015 22:05

Yep! My husband was pretty confident we were going to get pregnant the first month of trying and I think he was quietly disappointed when we didn't! He doesn't have children already, I think it was simply based on male pride! Likewise, how people fall pregnant by accident is beyond me! Oh to be that lucky!

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