We may all have the --rabies-- crazies, but we don’t need no ‘hints’ thanks! Grab yourself a (small) cider, get your sex towels at the ready, it’s Just Shagging 47!

[5hell]

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.
5. Thou shalt not be offended by the word vagina.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also known as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit), or PIATLH (Tea light holder), PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage (Self explanatory, who wouldn't?)

ROC = Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like Something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband (or Cuntraband) = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A Lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

Miroid - The male compadre of a viroid

Cat - Compulsory

Skittletits - Killer molten painful tits and nipples

Ghost jizz/goat jazz - When the amazing foof sucks up all the jizz - achieved when coming at the same time/nearly the same time.

The link to Part 46 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2374301-Sod-the-elections-we-want-erections-Were-hoping-our-miroids-will-deposit-their-seed-in-our-lady-gardens-and-well-all-end-up-growing-giblets-Come-and-join-us-on-our-magical-new-bedsheets-its-Jus?pg=1" target="_blank">HERE </a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2380377-JS-viroids-are-here-in-their-28th-outing-complete-with-exploding-belly-buttons-Theres-royal-foofs-and-jiffy-bag-gifts-but-most-certainly-NOT-x-rated-colouring-books-at-the-VAGINA-party-HQ" target="_blank">HERE</a>

The current Mumming Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/2355867-Weve-no-time-for-JSing-Were-battling-green-nappies-sleepless-nights-x-box-playing-men-and-trying-to-hide-our-sling-addictions-Fuck-it-lets-do-a-runner-on-a-golf-cart" target="_blank">HERE</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">HERE</a>

The Fred about 'how wooode' our Fred is darlings can be found <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2358940-The-title-of-those-conception-threads-rein-it-in-their-please-ladies?" target="_blank">HERE</a>

Stats sheet is <a class="break-all" href="https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/14Ap3NlZ0dP2Rjd1tRdpZ58my-7vZ-oUhevZ-4JROvyg/edit#gid=0" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">HERE</a>

We are the dark side of MN... Welcome!

Boo honey and I also think you deserve some kind of award!

So a 'friend' has an opk q, cb digi had another sodding flasher, ic really faint line. So, do we reckon yesterday's strong line was positive and the cb missed it?

ahh that amazing feeling when you see your ex, and he sees you,and he looks like shit whilst you look shit hot

I'd say so just but keep shagging just in case.

honey soy is "natures clomid". tricks body into thinking oestrogen is low so body produces more FSH and LH. depending on days you take you either ovulate earlier, improve egg quality, and/or increase no one of eggs released. you can do days 1-5, 2-6, 3-7 or 4-8. 1-5 for earlier icing but higher risk of multiples and 4-8 for egg quality. I was going to do 2-6 which is common online but forgot, so doing 3-7 this cycle. will let you know if ov dates change much.

oh and why the fuck would a photographer know that lots of brides get AF on wedding day! not something I'd have shared with my photographer!

I guess I could do 2-6, could do with icing earlier so longer LP but could also do with better egg quality I imagine.

Any advice on dosage?

lol i did think it weird that a photographer knew about AF haha! I certainly wouldn't tell mine when we get married!

just agree with lil keep shagging!!!

Aww she was lovely lil I built up a really lovely relationship with her whilst planning the wedding. I told her in the morning at my house because I felt a bit iky and she was reassuring me. I know it sounds a bit wierd but really she was like a friend by the day of the wedding.

I have soy questions, is it like a vitamin (where would I ge it fom

Ignore last post, pressed post on iPad too soon don't even ask about the green heart and the funny face!

my post take two
So I have soy questions, is it a vitamin, (where do I get it from)? How much do you take? Why if you take it on days 2- whatever it was 6 would that result in a giblet pregnancy?????

Excellent, I'll def keep shagging. Am worrying that might miss today as dp working late

I'm catering a wedding tomorrow janey!

Yes lil! Love that feeling! X

OK. I got soy isoflavones in Tesco once but couldn't find it the other day. I ended up getting it on a Holland and barret type shop.

usually cone in 40mg doses so online ppl say do 120, 120, 160, 160, 200. (being the 5 daily doses). if you are worried about multiples go later. 3-7 is a middle ground. don't take for more than 5 days. the dosage is based on clomid starting dose or something.

Radley fair enough, she must be a friendly person with all her brides! to be fair my photographer was a man!

Having read the first and last few posts, is this somewhere I can come and drink cider and really try and not get the crazies over ttc?

Welcome bonkers can't promise you won't get the crazies though!

Yes bonkers it is indeed! Grab a cold one and join us :D :D :D

radley the reason you can get multiples with soy if you take it early is it encourages release of an egg earlier and can stimulate two to be released

There's some useful info by kittyvon on one or two of the older soy threads. Just do a search. I think she reposted on the more recent "soy or agnus castus?" thread which might be on page two of the conception page. Fwiw I think soy triggered ov for me last cycle which my stupid short lp rendered useless anyway and brought my lh surge forward by six days so I was pleased with it regardless of no pregnancy. I took cd2-7 as I wanted to being Ov/surge forward as much as possible (although later is better for egg quality) and basically took dosage of 50,100,100,200,200 (although my dosage was weird because of tablet size and it was more like 47.5 and 87.5 and 198 etc). Best tip is probably to take at night to minimize side effects like nausea or headaches.
Cease cuntraband talk immediately!

I took soy this cycle as I figured it couldn't do me any harm. Have ordered more for next cycle online as Tesco no longer stock it!

I took it day 3-7. I'm hoping it made me ovulate - I had ovulation symptoms around CD11. Seeing that I don't have cycles, I'm waiting to see if it manages to help me at all.

Is it sad that I'm slightly impressed that giblets has become part of the vocab now?! I shall no longer fret over my typos ;)

Can someone please explain to my why my vag is regressing?! 12DPO but I have EWCM

would I had EWCM this cycle post ov...just sayin'

I think ewcm is quite common after ov. The corpus luteum still produces small amounts of estrogen so not unusual. :)

I had small amounts of ewcm yesterday and the day before too... unfortunately I think it's common as aut has said...

Wine are you still in for a Sunday piss party?

Ok, one more question on soy, if for example I come off BCP and I don't have periods, if I took spy would I then ovulate and then subsequently have a period?? when ttc #1 I did not have a period for 13 months

Also I resisted the Nutella choccy spread tonight feeling smug at this dh came home with some bad news, he thinks he may get sacked next week. A few weeks ago he sent some stock to the wrong company (he works in a warehouse) about 25k sent to America he knows he will get bollocked for it, but last year he had a written warning didn't realise he was getting one as he spoke to manager so thought it was just a verbal one he was getting he thinks the time frame will over lap and therefore if there another written warning it's likely to lead to dismissal. company is a bastard to work for I wish he would leave,

Strangely feeling calm and proud I left the choc alone I am now thinking about carma and weather he is being punished another long story or if I'm the one that's being punished again. But think I'm too tired to still be contemplating this.

Hmm... My ex has just added me on FB. Accepted mostly because I'm a nosey fucker . He's just messaged me saying 'hi' and all that jazz, and has just started talking about how he's just got out or prison... Think I was good to make him an ex when I did! Definitely gloating a little right now. Does that make me a bad person?

Feels almost as good as I imagine Lil felt in her post earlier...

Hi bonkers

Firstly sorry all for my seemingly insensitive craft xpost.....honey you are some sort of super woman powering on through all of that- pg must be a breeze in comparison

i am actually drinking a cider right now bonkers. ..Westons vintage 8.2%!!
Honestly sometimes were completely crazy over ttc, occasionally ha! some use contraband, sometimes we go off on a total random tangent, but everyone is always lovely and supportive no matter what's happening or what stage you're at

how's everyone rocking friday night?

Radley I tried taking soy when I didn't have periods for 9 months... it didn't seem to induce anything. I didn't take it for too long though as I didn't want to risk messing things up... Though that was at about the 4 month mark. It was at 4/5 months that I started taking the metformin though so I didn't try taking soy again just in case.

Now that I finally have had a period I DID take soy on CD3-7 this cycle. Had some ov symptoms around CD11, but don't know for sure if I ov'ed. Playing the waiting game now to see if it has had any effect.

5hell it was me that asked about seeing pictures of the craft... Looks great. I haven't tried cutting words yet...