The wheels on the February bus go round and round

[juneybean]

Ta da!

Maseface come on in and join the madness! Thanks for the comment. I tend to try to do the same. There's too much out there for any one person to know everything! But generally spend most days with knocking knees!

Are you ttc first?

Just catching up on the thread. Loads to read on.

But psssst babs if you visit the same city you went to yesterday again, come and say hi that's where Mr Boris and I are. Shhhhs.

You ladies are fascinating. Such a creative, strong bunch. So many of you have been through so much and so deserve this precious bfp.

Hello I've dipped in and out of previous threads. 10dpo and another BFN for me. I have irregular-but-roughly 39 day cycles and it just feels like such an age between 'chances'. Trying not to get my hopes up as I was very upset last cycle.

rough and for you. 10dpo is still fairly early. What kind of pissy sticks are you using? How sensitive? Hope in a few days you get your bfp :) x

Quick update from a part time lurker/part time poster :
AF got me today so I'm out for this month

babs I'm in the medical profession so not in the same line of work as you but I totally understand what it's like to have a very stressful job. My boss is a twunt not my favourite person. Having dd has helped me put things in perspective and I now see my job as just a 'means to an end' and have developed a slightly thicker skin. I have to remind myself I'm fortunate to have a stable and well paid job. I've also been lucky enough to go back to work part time so dd is my 'career' now and my job is just my job. That may sound a bit defeatist and lacking in ambition but it's the right balance for me.

Thanks to all who have been brave enough to share their difficult stories. I can personally relate to some of them and have nothing but admiration for you all. It is amazing what we have to face in our lifetimes.

Fx for all my cycle buddies. Keep us all updated. Eskimolaura I hope you get some answers soon.

PS, get yourself a blog or summat Purdey We'd all read it.

PPS, I'm not going anywhere yet, I'll sit at the back and stalk lurk some more

Sorry to hear you're out Marys. CD28 here, bfn on cheapy poas yesterday and now too nervous to use the more sensitive Superdrug ones as don't want to see another bfn. If no AF by Tues I might be brave!

Thanks pug How many dpo are you? I've heard that the cheapies aren't as sensitive as they make out to be.

12 or 13dpo I think. It was a Poundland one that is 25 whatever-the-unit-is, so no not very sensitive. The Superdrug ones are 10.

You're still in with a chance then. Fx and try to wait a couple more days

Sorry AF got you Mary.

Just caved and did the only pregnancy test I had left in the house- a Clearblue digital. BFN again, so might as well have just peed on a ten pound note. Still, at least I have no more tests = no more temptation. Ordered some ICs just now and they won't arrive for a few days, so hopefully I will not be tempted to buy anymore in the meantime.

Eskimo, you could have still spent ten pounds afterwards tho? Sorry that was flippant. Hope you are ok and get some answers soon.

Mary, thanks. I come back to that whenever I feel stressed. I'm so lucky to have the job I have and the opportunity. But I'm looking forward to having a child for exactly those priority reasons (amongst many others). Its not defeatist, it's the way life should be. I hope to go part time if we are lucky enough to have a baba

Babs, I would probably have spent it on another test!

Today is officially the longest day in history. DH has gone to visit his dad, and there is a huge pile of marking to be done, which is sitting on the kitchen table surprisingly NOT marking itself, whilst I am poas, fretting and Googling such things as 'Can you ovulate and not have a period?' 'Long Luteal Phases' and 'Estrogen/Progesterone rises after conception' (trying to find out why my skin has changed from being lovely and clear 2 weeks ago, to dry and flaky now).

Right, need to pull myself together. I can't be falling apart right now at the beginning of my TTC journey. What on earth will I be like if I do get a bfp? I am a worrier, but I need to stop. I'm not even late, if I did ovulate on Monday 9th. This marking isn't going to do itself. I will go and get on with it and stop procrastinating over this silly AF business. Of course it will arrive, and when it does, I will definitely be temping next cycle and then there won't be all of these questions.

Babs, I think there are lots and lots of people who struggle with university. I don't know hoe an eighteen year-old even gets through the first term. They are babies in life and knowledge and experience. I was thirty-six when I started my degree and I found the isolation paralysing at times. Yes, I only lived a few hundred yards behind campus but I was a raging alcoholic, friendless but still possessing a stomach-crunching determination to make my parents proud.

When I look at that picture I have just described I could laugh salty tears; there was no way on Earth I was going to get to graduation day. Anyway, that was seven years ago, but the failure feels like yesterday. I do not know why university is pushed on us as though it is a panacea when so many graduates end up at MacDonalds anyway I don't even think it is the work itself that makes uni so damned arduous; it is the pressure - pressure to be someone so much better than we are; the pressure to tick all the boxes; the pressure to succeed.

babs yes 32 years old and ttc#1 although less trying to conceive and more no longer trying not to. We haven't bren very 'organised' about it. I think I nievly thought that I'd come off the pill and get pregnant straight away seeing as I put all that effort into not getting pregnant for the last 15 years!
I've come to see the job as a job and not a vocation. Family would come first even if it's taken a long time to get to this point in my career. If I could give it up and runs a craft shop/ cake shop i totally would!

It's so nice to hear people talking about putting family etc before work. I feel exactly like that but seem to be the odd one out amongst my friends and work colleagues :( the culture at my work is to give everything to work and sacrifice personal life, I hate it!

Completely agree with you regarding uni purdey, although I am quite academic and enjoyed that side of it the social side was a nightmare, through pressure ended up in a relationship that made me miserable and ruined the whole experience. Would love to go back now and do it again. Don't beat yourself up about not graduating, it's definitely not all its made out to be and like you say nowadays does not guarantee a good job.

Maseface. I know. I thought I'd sneeze and be preggo, spent so long freaking out about not getting that way! So now just seeing what happens for a bit before I get seriously organised like the ladies in here....they put me to shame!

Purdey, I think we live in a bit of a perverse society today that weights formal education unduly in the achievement stakes. It is not the be all and end all. Life experience is worth so much more. If anything, uni is a bit of an artificial life that really doesn't set u up for life afterwards. You spend so much time amongst one group of peers, being labelled, competing and just trying to fit in in this pseudo reality that you come out virtually useless to real life.

Sorry for the rant. I have a few personal demons about measuring my self worth off academic achievement and social acceptance.

Eskimo, sweetheart, I can feel your angst about this cycle. There is nothing to do but watch and wait, my love (actually, my advice is to stop watching - your knickers anyway - a watched pot never boils). We can't know for sure whether you aren't going to need Noristherone again to bring on a bleed, but I don't know enough about the drug to know how (or if) it realigns a woman's cycle after its initial use. The fact that your day 3 hormones were normal is good news. Try not to worry; I think your period will come by itself.

hairstylist, it's internet cheapie sticks. I worry that I'm not ovulating - although got a huge positive on OPK this month which was good.

Starting to feel a bit crampy. Was inconsolable when this happened last month, feel a bit more ok about it this time.

I agree with the comments about university not preparing you for the real world. I am currently in my last semester and sometimes I look around in lecture halls & just see people on their phones, on Facebook, whispering to each other. Hardly any of them actually pay attention. Add to that the fact that they are allowed to wander into lessons whenever they feel like it, and that they only have classes 3 days a week and I honestly don't think that any of them will be able to handle an actual grown up job!

Although in some ways I wish I could have gone to uni when I was 18, I think that the fact that I have life experience and have worked for several years is invaluable when it comes to organising and motivating myself.

eskimo I am really sorry you are going through such a crappy time. If af hasn't arrived by mid week, I would definitely go see your doctor again. In the meantime, could you go out with friends or do any hobbies to try and take your mind off it?

New stats! As of this post:

BFP: 16
AF: 36
Late: 4
No update: 27
Pending: 20
TOTAL: 103

Thanks for that babybump You are a star.