Grab your Ganeshas and collect your cats: The Elderberry Pavlovas in the Quest for the New Year clusterdiff (thread 25)

[happylass]

The smallprint –
Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 12+ months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot and definitely no mention of baby dust or baby dancing).
Those not abiding by the rules may be escorted from the premises.

Ha Pip I've never heard of this grumble business but the Urban Dictionary has explained

Urban dictionary is a worry - so many innocuous words can mean something completely different in the right wrong circles!

Just had a quick look at Gill's runners and riders list. Good luck at your scan today Beaky. Any news from Barking?? OTD is tomorrow - wowsers, hope all is going well. Good luck

Well done smidge and kudos on making MrS some viewing material!

I'm afraid it's a BFN from Barking.

When I saw the word "grumble", I thought it was a typo. Who knew?! I will never hear the words "I mustn't grumble" in the same light again!

hallo everyone. so much going on in berry HQ these days.

Really sorry barking. Totally sh*t.

gil what an absolute freaking nightmare! how is that even physiologically possible? ARGAHRGHARGAHR

Happy and HB - day at a time, day at a time... fx so tightly for you both.

tiger how's the commuting going? knackering isn't it. Hope the job makes up for it.

Have some workign at home days planned next week so should be able to do a proper catch up then. Good luck to you smidge too...

Thank you for letting us know about Barking sending big hugs your way, we are here when you are ready but thinking about you.

Smidge hope that you are being fussed over and are taking it easy. Barry White is playing........

"grumble" must go and consult Google now....

Arghhh just typed massive post and effing phone list it.

Anyway;

smidge good job on the eggs, and on the adult entertainment for MrS!

Scan was shite, only two follies and only one was remotley big enough. Cycle is cancelled and they've suggested doing an iui and then next cycle short protocol IVF. So it looks as though I have a low ovarian reserve too. The clinic were lovely though.

I had a dream last night that they cancelled the cycle and didn't sleep well generally so am tired and upset! What a lovely beaky today poor MrB tried to cheer me up but I was too busy tripping over my chin.

Hope everyone else is ok and sorry for lack of checking in, will do so properly later.

Beaky I'm so sorry to hear that you have had to cancel, utter rubbish. I'm not surprised you are upset, the news alone is pants but on the back of a rough night....

Just googled the urban dictionary definition of grumble. I must never do that sort of thing at work again. Period.

So sorry beaky, good that they have a plan but rubbish for you and MrB at the moment. Big berry hugs coming your way xxx

So sorry they've cancelled your cycle Beaky, it's so disappointing particularly when you've been injecting for weeks on end. Seems like they have a plan of action though so hope the time passes quickly until you get cracking again.

Oh Beaky I'm so sorry - how very frustrating . Did they suggest testing your AMH? Sending big Berry hugs.

on no beaky. DAMN YOU WORLD. big hug x

to both barking and beaky. What a sh*tty week it's been in Berryland. Hopefully we'll have some good news soon.

Now I've posted that I'm reminded I used to commute though a place called Berrylands (it's near Kingston in south London) and it always smelled terrible because of the sewage works so I think I'll should call us Berrytopia instead. We don't need any more bad luck.

Oh beaky my lovely, I'm sorry to hear that. After all that injecting and anticipation it seems mightily unfair. Will they do thd IUI in this cycle with a trigger then? Big hugs to you xxx

Well done to you smidge and six eggs is plenty. Let's hope they're doing their thing right now. Hope you've recovered and at the homemade porn! It's all laminated stuff from the 70s at our FC according to MrT. Blurgh!

happy so when will you test? Keeping everything tightly crossed for you and hb. The vitamins from Zita West include £22.50(!) for the men's ones plus vitafem and vitafem boost and dha. I currently take pregnacare and omega plus coq10 so I'm already shelling out around £25 per month. Will discuss with Mr T tonight and do some research.

nolly the commute is knackering but the job is good and hopefully worth the disruption. I feel like I have purpose again! Also, the uncertainty about moving etc stops making the ttc uncertainty loom so large.

I agree tammy some good news needed!

hb hope your dear hound is ok. l

On the train home and less than an hour to go!

Oh Beaky that is just horrible. No wonder you are tripping over your own chin, it's completely understandable. Especially after you have been stabbing for weeks. It's just not fair.

On the up side, IUI is not nothing. And I assume this wont count as one of your NHS goes? So at least the FC will have a chance to find a treatment which suits you better.

Don't jump to any conclusions about having low AMH. Some people's ovaries just don't like being shut right down and then jump started again. This doesn't necessarily mean that anything bad is going on with you. The treatment just didn't suit you.

Really sorry to hear Barking's news too. What a rubbish week all round.

I'm very impressed by the homemade Smidge porn. Smidge you deserve some kind of award in recognition of your extreme dedication to baby making. Congratulations on getting through EC. Sending good vibes to your embies.

Yes I think MrSmidge got his timing very right with the request for homemade porn - how could I refuse when it was to help the baby making process - he even said something along the lines of how being able to see me/us together at the time of giving his sample will make him feel more part of the process etc.. Very cunning!! He certainly seemed to enjoy it more (and have plenty of anticipation on the morning of the EC!) so I hope it adds a little je ne sais quoi to his sperm! I hasten to add that I laid down conditions that the 'grumble' must be destroyed after it has fulfilled its purpose and that under no circumstances did I want to see it - am sure it would make me incredibly self conscious the next time we got down to business!

Oh Beaky that's so disappointing. I can't remember if this was your first attempt? I'm glad the clinic were nice about it and have already got a plan in place (well, two really). I'm sure they must come across this quite often and it actually just helps them narrow down the best treatment approach for you. I seem to remember short protocol can produce more eggs so fingers crossed with that, and at least this month you can try IUI while you wait.

for Barking too. So sorry to hear that.

Glad the job is going well Tiger and giving you plenty to think about. It's good to have other things to obsess over while you wait.

I'll let you know the fertilisation news when we get the call later today. Barry do your stuff. I felt really sore in the night when I got up to venture to the loo. Real sharp stabbing pains when I tried to stand up straight. Reckon the bloody scabby things inside after the EC must have stuck to each other or something smidge makes up medical explanations, probably not helped by me having fallen asleep with a hot water bottle on my belly squashing my insides together!
I feel much better now - but then again I am still lying in bed ... (But the time difference makes this ok Wild! )

I am wowed by MrSmidge's cunning!

Buggerration... Typed out a massive post but lost it! Grrrrrrt

Gill sorry to hear that. That's really crummy news.

Beaky - likewise on the crummy news front. Glad they've got a plan for you. Wild is right you may have over dampened your ovaries. Short protocol may suit you much better. Can you "try" with these follies? Or do you run the risk of being octo mum?

Smidge - well done on the fantastic 6 and hats off to Mr S on homemade porn! Do you get an update today? Hope you're feeling better anyway

LOl at grumble! Going to offer this to Mr Jellie ! Sure he'll say no!

I'm wide awake worrying about taking all my injections with me. (Cos of course I'm the first person on history to have to) hold luggage, hand luggage? Do you get extra hand luggage if one is 90% meds? I just want it to be Wednesday so I can stop fretting (this is a massive lie! I will completely be worrying about something new by then!)

Smidge look after yourself. I couldn't stand up straight for 2 days after EC, I was shuffling around like a crazy hunchback. And sneezing was the most painful thing ever! I literally had to curl up in a ball and hold the sneeze in as much as possible. By day 3 I was right as rain though so hopefully you'll heal quickly.
Jellie almost there for you but I know it doesn't seem like it when you're the one waiting.
I've had fair bit of brown CM over the last day or so and now I'm in a complete panic that AF is on her way. If it hadn't worked would I start bleeding so soon? (I didn't bleed at all last time until I stopped the meds). I'm on knicker check every 5 minutes! My sensible head is telling me it's probably nothing and I know I would be saying the same to any of you lot posting this but every little thing is a worry in this hideous process arrrrgh

Beaky Gill Barking hope you're all doing ok. Look after yourselves and treat yourselves to something nice this weekend

Handhold for you happy. There's no escape from our bodies and every little twinge and symptom. I'm hoping with every ounce of hope for your bfp this cycle. Not too much longer to wait.

Hope you're recovering well smidge!

jellie sounds like the kind of thing I would worry about! I would take them in hand luggage, if it is allowed otherwise I'd probably spend the flight stressing about the possibility of lost luggage!!

Af is threatening here, last but one before our ivf cycle. Zita vits ordered on the joint account after a discussion with Mr T. Two months supply at £150 which is probably a ridiculous waste of money but what the heck. I've wasted money on worse things!!

beaky hope you're ok.

Thank you all for being so supportive and kind. I did put more detail in the post that was lost to explain things but then was hurrying to get a new post done!

Happy no to amh testing at the moment - he said it does indicate low ovarian reserve but he didn't think it would be too low as I have ok fsh and Lh (I know that's not necessarily right but I wasn't focused on that at the time) I will certainly ask at the next appointment though.

So I will trigger tonight and iui will be Monday afternoon, and they've given me the delightful bum bullets too. I did bleed heavily after about 8 days post iui last time. Wild yes by changing to iui I still get the full NHS IVF entitlement which is very lucky I know. Like I say they really have been good when I've needed them to be. I just have no faith in iui working!

Tiger I say why not to the vits! especially in the run up to IVF. That is going to fly now. Glad the new job is going well too, I definitely think we can't just put out lives on hold for ttc or time just passes.

Happy I hope the spotting is nothing, but remember it is very common. All fx for you lady.

HB how are you and your puppy?

Smidge what's the news? Did Barry White do his thing?!

Jellie I think you would be unusual if you weren't worrying about all sorts of daft stuff, that's just stress for you eh.

Yesterday whilst I was a bit miserable, I deleted a whiny vm from a client who was whinging about something which she said was so much harder for her because she has a 7 week old I didn't even listen to the full thing also dh later told me he went into a new housing development and basically quizzed the rep for 20mins about why the houses are laid out so badly! Again, I think it's fair to say he wasn't over the moon at the IVF cancellation. He is so laid back usually!

How's everyone else today anyway?

Happy here for a hand hold if needed.

Beaky don't blame you for deleting the whinging vm, why people insist in oversharing like that is beyond me.

Smidge an news on your embies? Hope that you are feeling better, with your feet up and being waited on hand and foot. I am very impressed with homemade porn!

Tiger at the end of the day you have to be happy that you have done everything that you can regardless.

Jellie it may be worth contacting the airline as they may be a little funny about needles etc. they should be able to advise in the best course and may reassure you a little?

All okish here. The hound is starting to look better so stubborn infection it is (hopefully) which will mean up to eight weeks of antibiotics. Need to get the claim forms in as this has set us back about £1500. Still he is worth it

In other news not sure what OTD will show, my boobs are no longer tender and I don't feel of but I have given up trying to second guess what's going on. I still feel tearful (and this is different from last time) so I am clinging on to every shred of hope. DH is making like an ostrich and is still positive and so won't even consider discussing what happens next.

HB that sounds positive (I think!). Feeling different from last time must be a good sign. And despite my obsessive daily boob-cuppage in my tww, from all I've read, the hormone levels wouldn't be high enough to cause any noticeable changes til about week 5 (a week after BFP) anyway! Glad to hear your pup is on the mend too

Happy fingers crossed for you. Like I said for HB any symptoms that are different from last time must be a good thing, right?

Beaky I've definitely heard something about comparing the AMH to FSH/LH so don't dismiss what your doc said just yet - I think low AMH matters much more if your FSH/LH levels are also low

We got the fertilisation call yesterday and Barry (and the berry pom poms) must have done their stuff. 6 have fertilised normally (presumably it was the two teeny tiny eggs that didn't) so we're actually back in the game.... Fingers crossed they are good, strong, perfectly-chromosomed embryos who have each matched with the right sperm and are ready to get dividing and move back into my welcoming womb! (What's the opposite of a womb of doom? There must be a better phrase).

Day 3 call due in about 30hours not that I'm counting