Looking for a TTC buddy!

[Lorriella]

Hello! I'm needing a TTC buddy as I'm finding myself constantly over thinking things and it's driving my husband mad so would be great to discuss it with someone else in the same boat!

I'm TTC baby number 3. I came off the pill 3 days ago and I'm very impatient, want to get started right now! Anyone else in a similar situation want to buddy up?

Hi boo - nice that you have been busy through the tww torture! Maybe the lack of optimism is because you have been so pre-occupied and not a chance to think about it? Shame about your cold, mine was pre-xmas! If that's the case, hold out until Saturday to test, be easier on the mindset! What cycle are you in now? I am coming into my fertile window this week (fingers crossed) so I have text OH this morning that he had better be feeling energetic as dtd every other day hasn't worked for us so far, so this week it's EVERY NIGHT!! He doesn't know whether to be excited or shattered just thinking about it haha I'll then be due to test around the 25th - hopefully bringing a shiny BFP to the thread!!! jeez this optimism is hard work

If AF comes this weekend then this will be cycle after coming off the pill, first three months I'd say were just 'seeing what happens cycles' nov/dec cycles I was taking it as ovulating around the average time so been dtd on and around that time. Compared to the last cycles this non optimistic month is totally throwing me! I think feeling so gutted when AF showed up last time has maybe put me off. Yip, being optimistic when you want something so bad really is hard work! I know its hardly been the longest time ttc but it gets you down, especially when we have to go through it every month!

Oooh your OH must be looking forward to this week haha. Mine still doesn't know the extent to which I obsess over it (normally) and for now I'd like to keep it that way...he's just happy to be dtd so much, Must be great to be the man!

I'm sure I wouldn't notice any bloating or twinging this month anyway considering I've at 10 times my body weight in chocolates!

cycle 6 thats meant to be!!

You appear to be doing great, good attitude Well I have my fingers crossed for you!

My OH would say your OH is very lucky - my OH has witnessed some awful break downs and obsessive behaviour in the months leading up to xmas., maybe should have tried to keep it from him a bit. I think that because I had thought about being pg over xmas so much, my sub-conscience had made me believe it. My OH & I both have fertility issues, so I know deep down that it's going to be a much longer road for us but hey, at least we have the fun in trying!

Me too - back on the health kick wagon. I do like salad, I do like salad, I do like salad.....

Haha...I am a total salad dodger 90% of the year...unless its smothered in some kind of ultra fatty sauce, which defeats the purpose obviously!

Sorry to hear about the fertility issues yous are having. Fingers crossed for you its not too long a journey.

My OH has never had a child and my son was born when I had just turned 20, he was conceived when I was on the pill at 19 tho, I was prob missing the odd one or late taking it so I think I prob thought at first that it would happen right away being off bc....naive! Two of my friends have had long times ttc, one just over a year and the other around 2yrs. I don't want to jump the gun and be thinking about having tests done and stuff at this point but at the same time I don't want to be 2yrs down the line, coming up for 34 and realising we do maybe need help in that area.

I dont want to be nosey and don't feel like you need to answer but how long were you ttc before you found out about the fertility issues?

I'm 31 and def dont feel or think 31 is too old...I just don't want to be too much older before I start 'investigating' these things. My Aunt had fertility problems and my cousin also has the same issue, I know it's a heartbreaking thing to go through.

Salad? Bleurgh! I can tolerate watercress and rocket but iceberg lettuce is my nemesis, can't stand the stuff!
Don't need to lose weight (bottom end of healthy BMI) but eat far too much sugar. Took some corn fritters, leftover homemade coleslaw, olives, cucumber, tomatoes, chickpeas etc to work for lunch...then got bored and went and bought monster munch and skittles!

I'm 30 and this seems to be about the age most of my friends started TTC. There have been a couple of early starters but still mostly just happily married with no DC yet. Going to see how we get on, DH is a little concerned as he had mumps when he was a teenager. I did suggest he speak to the doctor if he was worried but resolutely against that.

Ok no more salad talk on this thread then!

Same as me, I have dd age 9 from previous relationship, had her at 18 & thought it would just be that easy again. Not nosey at all. I knew straight away. I only usually have a period every 3/4 months so knew that would be a factor, just didn't know how much. I had a coil after my daughter was born, and decided in April 2014 to have it removed after long chats with OH to have another baby. It was a stubborn little bugger and got lost\stuck in my womb. After several GPs/health advisors and me havin enough of constantly having someone prodding me around with my legs in the air I eventually had to go private to have it removed as it was 8 month waiting list on NHS. That was September 2014. It was only when the private gynae explained to me how difficult it would be for me with cycles like mine. He casually asked if my partner had any children which was no. Then he said we may went to get him checked as a precautionary measure.. Didn't expect that one to come back bloody low! That's just my luck though. So I'm technically only in cycle 3 of 4 months. The acupuncture seems to be helping me have a more regular cycle now - 33 days as opposed to 90. But bow trying to find out whether I am actually ovulating and whether I do have any eggs left... Should have eggs as am only 28. 31 is also still young. My advice would be to take it as easy as you can. If you have regular cycles etc, chances are that you are fine. If it comes to a year, ask docs for basic bloods.

Mmmmm monster munch!! Can mumps impact fertility then manderley?

Wow. Sorry about the essay!!

Loving the lettuce free zone although I have just filled my fridge with all fruit and veg to help boost my baby making vitamins and energy.

Manderley... Intrigued by the mumps thing, my nurse asked if I was protected from mmr jab because it would be important for me and baby in future when I eventually get pregnant?! Didn't realise it could affect fertility.

Really feel for you if having problems getting caught pregnant must be so hard. Could be me yet! Guess you don't know until you start trying. The whole coil thing sounds scary can't! How rubbish.

Fingers crossed for your bfp this weekend boo. Could be your time.

I'm shattered first full day at work today with 5:30 start!! Hmmmm dtd tonight? Best have a coffee for some energy haha!

Hi everyone, very new to this but have been reading the posts and completely sympathise.

I'm 30, and DH 32 was on Yasmin for 6 years, came off in September, gave it a month and we started trying in October...I never thought I'd get so obsessef but it's crazy, I feel like I am wanting to be pregnant so much that I am making symptoms appear then convince myself I must be pregnant only to get a BFN every time. I didn't realise I'd be so upset about it.

Lots of you are surrounded by those lucky enough to be pregnant and im the same my 2 best friends have under 1's and 1 is expecting her 2nd already, my baby brother became a dad 6 months ago, my big brother became a dad 16 months ago and expecting 2nd in April, and my sister who's quite a bit older than me and has a 13 year old has just announced she's pregnant. People treat me and DH like we're not worth anything. This isn't why we are trying, we waited to be in a semi-decent financial situation.

So now I'm 1 week away from AF and the wait is killing me. And I'm creating symptoms that I've read on the net in my head. DH and I have dtd every other day and knowing it's for a purpose kills the passion a little, especially when we make sure we're doing 'conception friendly' positions. Is anyone else having that issue?

Oh and sorry I forgot your name but your SIL has no right at all dictating when you should get pregnant.

Thanks for listening xx

First day back for me too... I have a 3 hr commute (total!) and feeling shattered.

Also swear I have EWCM again which makes me wonder whether I was optimistic earlier in the month. Ovid says I should have ovd a week ago, Ovuview says tomorrow. Both have same info! Last cycle was long so maybe that's it?

PLEASE don't think you are worth less as you have no kids yet. However hard it can be, you have to remember you're a human being not a walking womb. Christmas is probably a hard time for this as I know a lot of people for whom it's y'all about the children' He'll no! I will celebrate Christmas and buy/expect presents until I'm old and wrinkly!

MMR is as those can be dangerous once pregnant. Mumps is potentially an issue in men as, if they have it as teens, it can make their testes swell which can then affect fertility. It's not overly common though, I'll keep you posted ;-)

Ovia, not a Roman poet! Though this is a bit of an epic! Also excuse random apostrophes and typos, new phone required clearly!

Hi Stircrazy..you'll find we're all in the same boat here and the support is great because of that, not like boring friends and family with it every day haha.

My AF or testing should be around saturday..as i've said before last month i was so gutted by the bfn (i had created every single symptom under the sun!) that I'm really disheartened with it all! Oh well, I'll see very soon and if its not to be this month, I'll make sure we give it a right good go again next month! So far I haven't been saying much to the OH about it being fertile time or trying the 'conception positions' so for him it must just seem like we've had a great few months haha. Obviously he knows we're trying lol we had a very long few months discussing it before I came off the pill. But like you said I dont want to completely ruin all our 'moments' just yet. This month will be my 6th cycle off the pill although I've only really been making sure we dtd at the right times for maybe 3 or 4 cycles.

Fingers crossed for your bfp...plenty of help and support on here!

It's not great but you just get on with it and keep shagging I guess haha. Started my mission week off well! Happy OH! Yeah coil thing was shitty, but the private gynae was amazing. I have never really had an opinion on the NHS to be honest, as I've been lucky enough not to really use it other than when my daughter was born (which was fantastic) but after the whole coil scenario, it made me realise how bad it is compared to private care. We have embraced the possibility that it may well be IVF for us if we are not pregnant by the end of this year and we will 100% go for private treatment. The wait isn't great as it is, but the level of care is incomparable and fortunately we are in a financial position to be able to.

Did you have EWCM before manderley? Just think of it as your lucky second chance and OH's lucky day!!

Hi stircrazy - welcome to the clan! You sound like me- In the past 6 months - BF had baby, Sis, SIL, other best friend, oldest friend & colleague have announced pregnancies. It's so hard, but I just think, I didn't want that baby anyway, I'm making the perfect baby :) And yes that would be my SIL.... I'm kinda over it - but our relationship has suffered. Did my best the other day by offering to buy items for baby, that almost killed me off. And yes, I think it was last month that I could smell onions everywhere - that's a pregnancy symptom right??
And exactly as manderley says, you are not worthless because you don't have kids... in fact you will be worthless when you do have kids!! Nobody comes to see you anymore, nobody buys you gifts anymore. I sometimes think when I had DD .. it was ME who went through 9 months pregnancy, sickness, grew a baby, then went through 16 hours of labour (which wasn't that bad) and then everybody bought the baby presents... um excuse me?! What about poor me over here?? So embrace it while you can!

Stircrazy and boo - do you mean that you are in not in the throws of passion every single time & you just can't get enough & that you put baby making to the back of your mind? No me neither

So it's you 2 in the running for the 1st BFP this thread!! How exciting!! I hope it's both of you

cant you are so right about the baby gifts! Where is our reward haha! Well we know our reward is really our kids but come on lol. And you're also right about after you've had the baby...after the first few weeks of visits it all tails off and suddenly its like you dont exist maybe a bit over dramatic of me there but also some truth haha. Throws of passion? What throws of passion...I'm primarily baby making lol but for the OH he's blissfully unaware of my masterplan..muahahahahahahaaa! Not really!

Yeah my wait is almost over...though I'm still not holding out much hope this month for whatever reason. Crampy feelings on and off last night and today so I'm sure the witch is on her way! Just in from a big long walk with the dog and OH and the cramps seem to have gone again, no mad symptoms at all compared to last month when I had every pregnancy symptom you can imagine which I'm sure was down to wishful thinking!

I swear our dog got more for Christmas than we did. I even have friends who come over 'to see the dog'. Charming! I see it as preparation for kids?

Sticking with presents, we always buy presents for the parents, particularly things that aren't allowed in pregnancy

Fairly certain I had EWCM already but it's never overly obvious for me anyway so who knows!

Ah what lucky friends you have lol! I never even had any idea about checking cm til I was lurking on these threads! If I get a bfp this month I'm gona have to do a little research about that, I intend to take ttc more serious after this cycle and get to know my body.

Well I've said before that I've kept symptom spotting to a minimum this time as I don't feel I've really had any to notice but 4 days out from testing/AF and its back with a vengeance! I think I'm about 11dpo and since sunday I've been noticing light cramps/niggling very low in the abdomen, last night in bed I had a few sharp pains at either side (immediately thought ovaries? But again, not completely sure I know my body that well at all since ttc!) just for a min or so. Same again today, on and off light cramps low down. I dont remember cramping this early before AF...anyone else experienced this? I dont have sore boobs or feel overly weepy either. Damn this ttc is so confusing! Other than the cramps the last few days I'm still pretty symptomless!

Promised myself not to test til saturday but already having thoughts of..."well I have to go in town tomorrow for a few things...maybe swing by superdrug and pick up a....."

Stir crazy, welcome. I was exactly same as you post ovulation last month, consistently googling symptoms but guess it was my body adjusting to not being on the pill. Also dtd... I've convinced dh that my pill supressed my sex drive and that I'm now incredibly horny and he's bought it so luckily it keeps it exciting!!

Can't, I cannot begin to imagine how hard it is month after month struggling? How did you realise there was a problem? When did you decide to get checked out.

Boo - there's no harm testing unless you think it will break you if it's negative. I wasted money last month because deep down I think I knew I wasn't but still poas about 3 times. Superdrug has got good rep so probs a good indicator?!

Hope everything ok with you manderley?

I'm apparently in fertile window so on it like a car bonnet! Even woke dh up last night to dtd when I got home from a late nail appointment... He looked astonished when I disappeared under sheets. Trying my hardest not to symptom spot this month so please no one let me!!!!! Anyone taking any preconception vitamins? I take folic acid and vitamin c but any other recommendations?

You are right boo - but I would still love somebody to walk in immediately with a ready poured glass of bubbly and a cheese board
Lucky friends be buggered - and the hardest part is that they have no idea how lucky they are. Not their fault I know but still hard! I haven't experienced your symptoms, but I have heard stories like this about implantation bleeding? Def poas on Saturday! Let this month be your surprise month. Step away from Superdrug!! I have also heard that they do good sensitive tests.

manderley our dog is spoilt rotten also, and my mother breezes through the door, no 'hello' - it's 'where's the dog?' haha. What breed do you have?

I wrote a little bit above boyle about a problematic coil (don't want to bore anybody again) but basically if I hadn't gone private and mentioned my erratic periods and been advised to have OH tested, I probably wouldn't have known enough to realise that we would have had problems. You don't really get used to it, it's just a bit harder not to become obsessed. Where dtd is concerned and I am not feeling it, I am always thinking 'what if this is THE ONE night that I have an egg waiting and OH has that ONE super sperm that will make it lol.

I am also on it like a car bonnet (love this phrase) - just checked FF and so far have done CD5 (twice), CD9, CD10(twice), CD12, CD14, CD15.. according to FF, I come into fertile window today so this may all have just been wasted effort so far but here's to hoping for some EWCM today as nothing yet. OV predictedfor Friday but we'll see...

I take pregnacare conception (cheaper on Amazon btw) - I take these because there are lots of things in there to help egg related issues - selenium etc and there are lots of zinc, vit 6 etc for sperm count/quality)

Sorry can't just read back and seen your other message using my phone when on here and so this thread is over about 10 pages... That must have been horrible ... Ouch!!!! Seen everything about private healthcare etc too and definitely know what you're saying. A few friends of mine have recently dealt only with private treatment and one has had all her scans for pregnancy privately and paid around £50 for each one but she had four to keep seeing baby.

Bored on lunch break dreaming of being pregnant and how different my life will eventually be...

So my trip into town ended in the pharmacy buying some sticks Now just to stop my grubby little fingers opening them til at least friday! never gona happen!!

My friend who had difficulty conceiving had a terrible time with the NHS regarding testing etc and eventually went private but she was lucky and found out she was pregnant a few days before initial treatment. Not knocking the NHS, its great that we have such a service but it does seem to be being ran into the ground and under so much pressure. BLOODY GOVERNMENTS, NO MATTER WHAT PARTY!! OOOPS MUST SAVE MYSELF FROM POINTLESS RANT HAHA!!

I also know a few people who went for the 3d scans, thats something I would be interested in. I would love to be able to afford to have my whole family go private but until I win that lottery....

That's alright, just didn't want to bore everyone again. Was a little bit ouchie but more relief that we could eventually start trying and then BAM! No not that easy for you love! Never mind, no harm in trying!

I do that all the time - when I was trying to get up for work Monday morning, I was thinking 'dammit, i'm supposed to be on maternity leave right now!!' ahhhhh

Naughty naughty boo - I haven't poas for ages. Gave up the devil OPKs and no reason for PT since before xmas.

Bit peeved if I'm honest, still no EWCM... had the smallest bit you had ever seen 2/3 days ago and nothing since. So frustrating!!! Will still be hopping on OH tonight just in case

I wish we could go back to Christmas where I was so busy and wasn't so obsessed as I am again now

OK - EWCM update - I have just had the teensiest bit again... if I'm going to have it, can it make itself a little more obvious please??

Also having a moment wondering when it became normal for me to have discussions with people (as lovely as you all are) but whom I have never met about the contents of my knicks???

Haha...cant it is so strange to be discussing all this with strangers but also therapeutic in some way? Possibly confirming to ourselves that we are not the only 'crazy obsessive' ladies in the world lol. Before joining MN only a month or two ago, I was feeling that ttc was getting quite lonely..not sure thats the right word but I mean in the sense that not a lot of friends and family know we're ttc and as the OH doesn't have the same bits as me lol then who could I share all this TMI with!

I have no idea what I'm looking for and haven't previously been checking cm so I'm no help at all in regards to that..sorry. Right now at approx 12dpo last night and this morning I've noticed (only when I wipe, not on my knickers lol) almost a yellowy tinged cm, if my memory serves me well (which sometimes I think I'm still suffering from baby brain 11yrs later!) I dont think I've had this before..in recent cycles anyway.

I'm totally with you about Christmas, obsession has kicked back in for me the last few days after a relatively easy going week or so. Almost over for me this time though so I'm now in the stage of being so nervous about testing and dreading another bfn, especially as I dont feel I have any real symptoms. But I said to myself today, if its another bfn then all the months gone by have taught me another thing I never knew about my body and cycles.

Really need to try and push this PMA!

Feeling the christmas pain, I just loved being at home with I oh and relaxing, now back to leaving house at 7 and not getting home until 7!!

Did an actual lol at the telling strangers your business, I'm the same although it's good to get off chest because we've not told anyone were trying and I don't want dh thinking I'm a complete obsessed maniac.

My cm was just a little bit on tissue leading up to what I hope was ov but then on cd16 I got loads and it had red streaks in it which at the time I hoped was plantation. It was gross though and not sexy at all. I'll see what happens this month as I'm supposed to he ovulating by weekend.

Such a rubbish day today, be glad when I'm on way home. Decided to announce that I've given up wine for January and February (did last year for cancer research) and people have bought my reasons why so fingers crossed it will help if I get bfp end of jan!!!