anyone else been ttc for over 2 years?

[Madigan]

Thought I might start a thread for anyone who has, like me, been ttc for a long time (nearly 3 years in my case).

Would also be great to hear from anyone who was ttc for long time, then got their bfp, to keep those positive vibes going ...

My stats:
Me - 34
DH - 36
TTC - nearly 3 years
DH - initially low sperm count (14 mil), now up to 60 mil (but 80% abnormal and borderline level of anti sperm antibodies)
Me - mild/moderate endometriosis (treated by laser in Oct 05)
Clomid: Dec 05-Feb 06 - BFN
IUI: Feb 06 and April 06 - BFN
Currently on 3rd cycle IUI (day 10 DPO)
If this doesn't work, IVF/ICSI in November 06 at ARGC.

Please join me for support in getting that elusive BFP ....

Madigan, don't know if I qualify, but here are my stats :

Me 39
DH 45
TTC - 23 months and 3 weeks then got BFP.
DH - normal (according to sperm tests).
Me - normal (according to bloods, internal scan and HSG).
1 BFP in March ended in M/C in May.

Now 6+6 weeks and hoping it goes well.

If it doesn't I have option of IUI and IVF, but can only use them by June 2007 as will then turn 40.

4 years in total

2 1/2 years trying naturally
then 1st ICSI attempt at Bourn Hall which didnt work
FET at Bourn Hall which again didnt work
then 1st ICSI at ARGC, somehow found that I was pregnant before started but it was eptopic
Had surgery after eptopic, lots of scarring so ICSI still recommended which worked and dd 1 is now 4
And then a little miracle came 18 months later who is dd2

Hi Madigan- Good idea..
Me/ dp - no tests yet- were due to start in April but fell pg and then had 3rd m/c in June.

TTC -for 3- 3.5 yrs (1.5 yrs to 1st pg/1.5 yrs to 2nd pg/ 6 months to 3rd pg and then 3 months to this pg)

3 m/c in total.

Pg now and am 5+6- having early scan in 2 weeks- still have appointment for investigations but have put in on old to see how this pg goes....

We had been trying for 27 months when I fell pg naturally with dd who has just turned 2. I fell the month following a laparoscopy that gave the all clear.
We've been trying for number 2 for 5 months now. No mc as far as I know. I've been charting for 2 months because I'm definitely not prepared to wait so long this time. We'll seek medical advice if nothing happens by Xmas.

Me: 36
Dh: 44

its so good to hear all your success stories after so long at ttc .....
I can only hope that my story has the same happy outcome. were you always optimistic that you would get there in the end, or did you (like me) have nagging worries that you would never get a bfp? Having a really hard time at the moment, thinking it will never happen .
Jenkel - how did you find ARGC (which is where I am being treated at the moment)

Madigan, we wanted to give nature a good go before turning to doctors. The thought of ivf scares me a lot, I would have rather turned to adoption. We were very naive and I was very ignorant about the whole baby making thing. And we had very stressful jobs at the time, in a stressful country, etc, that made us think we needed more time than the average couple, iyswim.
Of course I was scared never to get pg. With number 2 it's different, I know we can do it, and I've educated myself !

Madigan, Started to think after about a year in that I would never get a BFP.
By that time we'd already had tests to show there was nothing wrong, but it still wasn't happening.

Then we went on holiday and I fell pg, so was definately necc to relax. However, this time it was like a military operation LOL, but think I was at the "oh well it probably won't work anyway" point"!!

Its a long time since I was there so trying to remember.

I did feel confident that if it would work it would work there, felt that they would try anything possible and had lots of different ideas on ways to proceed, the office seemed a little bit disorganised and perhaps the staff that I dealt with on a day to day basis were a little abrupt, probably seemed worse as you are in a bit of an emotional state anyway but I did have great faith in the actual medical staff and the medical staff seemed to be really friendly.

At the time that we were using ARGC they were probably one of the most expensive and also probably one of the ones with the bast statisitics, not sure if thats still the same now, and you can probably read what you want into statisics anyway.

We were referred for treatment as DH had a very low sperm count, cant remember the actual amount. And then after I had the eptopic and the scaring that went with that. So really not sure how our little miracle happenend.

Yes, I did feel that it would never happen, I really went through my darkest days, I just couldnt imagine leading my life without kids. Family honestly didnt think that I wanted kids as I used to distance myself so much when friends or family had babies, but it was just a way of protecting myself. We never told our family of going through Fertility treatments, again another one of protecting ourselves, I really struggled when the attempts failed and it would have been worse having to explain that to our parents who didnt have any other grandchildren.

Looking back now it seems like another persons life, really hard to believe that it was me.

So Madigan, please keep faith, it can and does happy and good luck.

TTC for nearly 4 years - had hysteroscopy (normal), DH had a couple of slightly abnormal semen analyses & fell pregnant the month before I was due to start IVF (after 6 weeks of reflexology).

Dd is now 19 months & am pg again.

It did feel like it would never happen at times, DH & I made a plan of what we would do if IVF didn't succeed (take a really long scuba diving trip to completely child-unfriendly places). But it was a shitty peiod of my life so you have my utmost sympathy.

D'oh, meant HSG not hysteroscopy.

It sounds like you all know exactly where I am coming from at the moment.... it really is so reassuring to read about your successes -
at the moment I feel so "left behind" my friends, and keep thinking that DH and I are going to be "the couple who can't have children". I know we would cope, but at the moment I just can't imagine a life without children and am getting desparate.
It's all coming to a head for me now, as I am waiting to see the outcome of my final IUI (on day 10 DPO today, did test today and got BFN, but even I know I tested far too early), before going on to IVF/ICSI next month. Feel like I am at the final opportunity stage - and if this doesn't work, nothing will.
But it is so brilliant to read all about you guys and see that there might be a light at the end of the tunnel. XXXX

Really hope things go well for you, Madigan. Have you tried reflexology BTW? I was pretty sceptical about it (but willing to try anything). I've heard it can help relax you during IVF, too.

Madigan....what a good thread to start....really encouraging to read all these success stories...especially the people who needed some help after ttc for a long time and then fell pg naturally anyway!

My stats...
me 35
dh 34
TTC from Dec 1998(ish) - September 2003
clomid for 3 months.....fell pg month after!!
TTC from June 2005 - now.........
clomid for 3 more months.......nothing yet!
No official medical reason but my LP is very short.

As you know...DS was stillborn so I guess we have been ttc for a l-o-n-g time with a nice 9 month pg gap in the middle there!

Hang in there....you've several days to go yet.
X

I also appreciate how you feel about being left behind....lots of my friends are on their second children and some who were ttc at a similar time as we started have their children well in school!!

Madigan - another success story here.

We were ttc for 2.5 years. DH has a very low sperm count (about 3 million I think, with terrible motility and mobility too). We were due to start IVF/ICSI in April 2004. I found out I was pregnant in Feb/March 2004. DD is now 22 months.

We followed the Marilyn Glenville book "Natural Solutions to Infertility". We gave up alcohol, caffeine, red meat, cow dairy (switched to goat), changed to an organic diet.

We both had acupuncture which I think helped a lot. My dh also took chinese herbs, zinc, vitamin A,C & E. I can't remember which supplements I took other than Vitamin B, Omega 3, 6 & 9 and folic acid

We're now ttc Number 2, but won't wait as long this time. I'm absolutely certain that there's another baby out there for us, even if it's an IVF one. Just as I was always absolutely sure that we would have a child the first time.

I didn't know whether it would be conceived naturally, by IVF or adopted, but I absolutely knew that we would have a child in our lives one day.

Littlefish -
I was wondering - how long did you follow the diet for before becmoing pg, and did you ever have your husband's semen analysed again to see if it had improved as a result of the diet???

Jenkel - thanks for all your info on the ARGC. I do feel that I am in good hands there.

Liath - I have tried a little reflexology, but am also doing acupuncture as well. Have another reflexology appointment next week - so will stick at it now - might as well do both...

Coggy, glad you have joined thread XXXX.

Madigan - it was a gradual thing, I gave up alcohol first, but it took my dh another 2 years before he gave up. First we switched to organic food, then we gave up red meat and cow dairy. We certainly couldn't have made all the changes at once. As it was, we felt we were living like monks at the end!

We didn't have a re-test done, because I got pregnant! I suppose that would have been done if we'd gone as far as IVF.

Even if it hadn't improved, I still feel that it helped us cope with the situation, by feeling we were doing something to help ourselves and taking control. We made the decision that if IVF was the way forward, we were going to make sure that we gave ourselves every possible chance of it working, by eliminating toxins etc. from our bodies (and particularly mine) and being in optimal health.

Something worked - it may just have been time, it may have been the acupuncture, or the diet, or the chinese herbs, or the yoga. We'll never know really.

We were ttc for 2.5 years with dd who is now 15 months, and have been properly ttc for number 2 for 7 months now. It is unexplained IF.

We did 3 x IUI and 2 x IVF all without success, then got pg naturally (a miracle!) whilst waiting for pgd IVF. We tried all the supplements, diets, reflexology, acupuncture, charting etc

I feel very very lucky everyday to have dd, and remember clearly how hard it was when all our friends and family had babies but we were getting so many BFNs. IF and ttc are tough and really affect relationships (partners as well as friends) too.

I would love another - greedy I know, but I just love being a mummy (and DH a daddy). Im trying to keep calm about ttc again but I find it hard. Its such a strain on a relationship and a passion killer! At the moment, Im not sure that we would have more treatment as we seem to have a problem that isnt helped by IUI or IVF (sometimes I wish it could be).

I believe you will have the BFP you so wish for. Good luck (esp with this month)
x

Sticki...
Lovely to hear about your miracle dd.
X

We were ttc for about 3.5 years & We'd had tests,clomid,lap & dyes with no result.It was unexplained infertility & we were told that we'd probably never have children without IVF.

After ages on an NHS waiting list & no treatment in sight,I started acupuncture & was waiting for AF to start so we could begin IVF privately.My period didn't arrive & to my absolute shock I found out I was pregnant.Sadly it was ectopic & I was told that my chances,even with IVF were lower than ever.

However,I am stubborn & refused to listen & started acupuncture again.A few weeks later I was pregnant again & had a healthy dd.Around her 1st birthday,we decided to try for no2.With our history we knew it could take years to concieve,but I got pregnant the 1st month we tried & now am lucky enough to have 2 gorgeous dd's.

It is hard to believe that 4 years ago,I was convinced by the experts that we'd never be able to have children.I felt like I was in some kind of race with my contemporaries & they were disappearing over the finish line whilst I couldn't make it to the start.I am very lucky to have my girls.

Wishing you lots of luck Madigan & everyone else.

Although dd1 was conceived almost straight away, it took 4.5 long years to conceive dd2 and so, instead of the 18 month gap we had hoped for, there is over 5 years between the two of them.
I had two m/cs during that time, and honestly thought that I would never have another child.
I was told by the fertility consultant that I probably wasn't ovulating any more - yet 6 weeks later, I found out that I was pregnant with dd2 who is 11 months old now.
FWIW, the things I did in the months leading up to dd2 being conceived were: reflexology (seemed to regukate my cycle, with a handy side-effect of sorting out an ongoing sinus problem, too), a low GI diet (also thought to help regulate hormone levels), a vitamin supplement fom Zita West and an omega-3 supplement (mumomega).

me-22(18 when first trying)

dp-26(22 when first trying)

ttc- 2 years, didn't get medical advice.... too young and poor. i had several v.early miscarriages so the problem was obviously me. conceived dd but had such low hcg levels tests were still neg at 10 weeks, had to have a scan to confirm preg, and even then the normal scan couldn't see her, had to have and internal scan. normal pregnancy.

got pregnant with ds 9 months after dd was born without a single period and without much sex! he's 2 months now

Sticki, Mirage LucyJu, PinkTulips

It is just so amazing and consoling to read about your stories - you know exactly what I and many others on MN are going through, and it does give so much comfort to know that it CAN and DOES happen, even after years of heartbreak!!! I am determined to remain optimistic now . (you can remind me of that when I post my next "down in the dumps/feeling sorry for myself" email ....) XXX

madigan- like you i feel i have been trying forever
dh 33
me 29
ttc since 2002
feel like it is never going to happen if only i had a crystal ball then i'll know if the heartache will come to something
been on clomid dec 05 - may 06
just had my 1st iui yesterday and praying that its going to work
Its comforting to know that your not the only one in this situation isn't it especially when everyone around you seems to be getting pregnant so easily .
Good luck on this treatment cycle i shall be checking to see how you are doing .
its good to read all the success stories it has inspired me to be optimistic at least
{smile}

Relax.....I do hope your IUI gives you your much wanted baby.
I am starting it very soon so I will be watching your news and progress intently.

Madigan......how are you holding up in your 2WW?